We have had a very hard, freeing few days.

[mom4him]

My two youngest children and I have fought Multiple Chemical Sensitivities (MCS) knowingly for about 1 1/2 yrs. Actually it has been much longer than that with somethings with our son but the majority of knowing what is happening has been in that time frame.

For those of you that don't know what this is, it is when your body reacts adversely to the chemicals in our enviroment, the things that we put on our skin, or eat. We live in a vary toxic world filled with fragances(more than 5000 different chemicals used in these) cleaning products and food color and preservatives. When you react to many or most of these live can become a nightmare.

One of the major ways we have delt with this and received some healing is through not exposing ourselves any more than we need. This has helped greatly. The other thing that we have done is start taking NAET treatments. With either of these it is important to not expose oneself to major toxins in the air witch can be very difficult at times to even leave our home with fabric softners and laundry detergents with fragrances being used in the neighborhood.

The church that my husband and oldest son works at is the same church that we have gone to for the last 24 yrs. We were a part of it when it was first established in our town and have been faithful throughout the years. I have talked to the leadership about what we have been fighting and how we are doing all we can to stay in as clean an enviroment as possible. My dh and I have been buying the cleaning products for up there for the last couple of years(we knew they were an issue with ds for some time). I had also talked to the leadership about the paint that had been used in the past and asked that zero VOC paint be used(to me it makes sence to use this regardless?). Again we have been using this paint for several years just out of general principles. (I thought that this was being done). I had also asked that the congregation have it explained to them about the fragrances and how difficult they make it for people who are reactive to them. This is something that our pastor never really made a commitment on. For the most part we have had to stay at home because of the high amount of colognes and perfumes that are used by the people that go there.

Well, to make a long story not quite so long, there was a bunch of painting done using regular paint last week. I addressed the issue as VBS is coming up and that is one thing that I have tried to make sure the kids get to go to. In the process our Pastor's wife told me via email that she simply didn't have the time to run back and for getting the zero voc paint(I had told them that I could do the running with some of this stuff but was never asked). I was very upset as this meant that my two dc wouldn't be able to attend the VBS. Her responce was basically, "Oh, well, I am sorry they won't be able to come." I responded back that I was sorry also and that I felt this said a lot about a church that teaches how they show love, have a major vision for the children and encourage everyone to live a healthy life style through good nutrition and exersize.

I guess this upset her a lot. Our pastor came visiting the next day and basicly said he was not going to do anything further releasing the kids and I do find a church that matched up with our needs and beliefs better.

I have found several VBS's that we can go to as they are outside so makes it much easier. We will continue doing home church for a time but will be looking for another church body that is possibly already doing some of the things we need. I know they are out there, I just need to find them.

Sorry this has been so long. It has really been a difficult few days. At the same time I finally feel the freedom to simply walk the other way with my Lord holding my hand.

[Kathy in MD]

There are times that I really wonder about some people. Are they afraid that the special paint will cost a lot more? That's the only possible excuse I could begin to understand.

[Erin's Mom]

It sounds like it is time to walk away from your old church. Continue your home church seeking God's desire for your future. Sometimes these things happen when God closes one door in our life and opens another. God is our leader not man.

Blessings

[mom4him]

There are times that I really wonder about some people. Are they afraid that the special paint will cost a lot more? That's the only possible excuse I could begin to understand.

It does cost more than some paints but not more than the paint that they used. I have been pretty puzzled by this.

It is more inconvienient if you end up having to go get more as the store that carries it is 30 miles away. If I had the choice I would definitely buy locally but they don't even know what I am talking about when I go into that store and ask about zero voc. Not even after 3+ yrs of asking.

[mom4him]

It sounds like it is time to walk away from your old church. Continue your home church seeking God's desire for your future. Sometimes these things happen when God closes one door in our life and opens another. God is our leader not man.

Blessings

Yes, that is what I feel also.

God is so good. I had fought so many things for so many years and not realized what the cause of them were. It was only through researching, trying to figure out things for our son that I realized that most of the things that I had been fighting were caused by the chemicals. I know that it was Gods leading that showed me these things and He hasn't changed. He is still leading.

It is hard to really leave a body of believers you have been a part of for so long. They have been our family or at least I had thought. I have realized that there really aren't many people willing to make much of a change for someone else. I have made peace with that but will never really understand it.

I know that He will show us where and when to do from here.

Thanks for your encouragement.

[LizzyBee]

It is really hard when people don't understand and don't try to accomodate allergies and sensitivities. I had a sister who had multiple severe allergies, including perfumes and fragrances. She was a nurse and her hospital was supposed to use scent-free soap in all the dispensers. She kept explaining that things like this didn't just help her; it would help patients and visitors too. One day she was at work and when she washed her hands, she realized there was perfume in the soap. It triggered an asthma attack, which led to pneumonia, and she died within a week. People who don't have allergies or a family member who does don't understand how serious they can be. I'm sorry your church isn't being more helpful. I hope you find one that will be more understanding.

[lollie010]

I think people just really do not understand the profound effect that environmental chemicals can cause. I do not have anything to the degree that your family is suffering with, but I do have reactions to some cleaners and to perfumes. They are impossible to avoid. I pray that you find a supportive network so that your family can live more.

 

Praying.

Laurel

Edited May 26, 2009 by Laurel T.
spelling

[mom4him]

It is really hard when people don't understand and don't try to accomodate allergies and sensitivities. I had a sister who had multiple severe allergies, including perfumes and fragrances. She was a nurse and her hospital was supposed to use scent-free soap in all the dispensers. She kept explaining that things like this didn't just help her; it would help patients and visitors too. One day she was at work and when she washed her hands, she realized there was perfume in the soap. It triggered an asthma attack, which led to pneumonia, and she died within a week. People who don't have allergies or a family member who does don't understand how serious they can be. I'm sorry your church isn't being more helpful. I hope you find one that will be more understanding.

These are the kinds of reactions that I have sometimes.

Yesterday I was working with some new bedding. I had washed this in detox formula 4 times, dried it on hot 2 times and thought I had all the gunk washed out. Went to fold it and had an asthma attach. Mine have never been extreme. It seems if I can get away of what ever has caused them I can work myself through but can be very scary.

I am so sorry for the lose of your sister. How tragic because of something very preventable.

[mom4him]

I think people just really do not understand the profound effect that environmental chemicals can cause. I do not have anything to the degree that your family is suffering with, but I do have reactions to some cleaners and to perfumes. They are impossible to avoid. I pray that you find a supportive network so that your family can live more.

 

Praying.

Laurel

I totally agree with this and pray that they never personally experience what it is like but rather that the Lord give them a caring, understanding heart.

Thank you for your prayer.

[Tree House Academy]

It is really hard when people don't understand and don't try to accomodate allergies and sensitivities. I had a sister who had multiple severe allergies, including perfumes and fragrances. She was a nurse and her hospital was supposed to use scent-free soap in all the dispensers. She kept explaining that things like this didn't just help her; it would help patients and visitors too. One day she was at work and when she washed her hands, she realized there was perfume in the soap. It triggered an asthma attack, which led to pneumonia, and she died within a week. People who don't have allergies or a family member who does don't understand how serious they can be. I'm sorry your church isn't being more helpful. I hope you find one that will be more understanding.

 

Wow! I had no idea people were that allergic to these things.

 

To the OP, I am so sorry the church did that to you. Prayers that you find another church that WILL accomodate your needs very soon! God Bless!

[mom4him]

Wow! I had no idea people were that allergic to these things.

 

To the OP, I am so sorry the church did that to you. Prayers that you find another church that WILL accomodate your needs very soon! God Bless!

Thanks you for your kind words and prayers.

I don't think a lot of people truly realize how extreme the reaction can be.

One time we were out and about and ended up going into several restrooms that had strong deodorizers in them. My ds ended up in a full blown rage. Probably the worst he had ever had. It was so scary, especially out in the public. All I could do was do our best to get him into the car and get us headed for home. Praise God my dh was along and I was able to sit in the back with him and keep him from putting us in the ditch. It was horrible!

You tell someone about it though and they just smile and look like,"well if you would just discipline him everything would be ok." I have gotten that a lot from our church people. They don't realize that it may be their cologne that is part of the problem.

I so appreciate the words of encouragement that have been expressed here.

[teamturner]

:grouphug: I'm sorry the church didn't respond in a more loving way. God has a better place for your family and it may take a while to find it, but he is with you and will comfort you. I'll be praying for your family.

[mom4him]

:grouphug: I'm sorry the church didn't respond in a more loving way. God has a better place for your family and it may take a while to find it, but he is with you and will comfort you. I'll be praying for your family.

Thanks, Michelle. He is the one stable thing in life. He never disappoints.

[Wyndie]

Ugh, we have been in similar situations and it just stinks. At one time, we had to go to the ER every Sunday after church b/c fools in the nursery would not take simple precautions. I am so sorry you are being forced to leave a comfortable spot b/c people are not willing to show the true (sacrificial) love of Jesus to one of their own.

 

I am in a church now that does everything in their powers to accomodate my children. I hate that it's necessary but as the pastor said, if they can't show the love of Jesus to those with the special needs, who will?? They are truly the hands and feet of Jesus at my church. They express love in ways that is not convenient to them, but exactly what we need. Admittedly, we sit some get togethers out just to give them a break, but if we want to be included, there is an entire group of people who are in charge of making sure our needs are met. I pray you find a church that will be understanding of your physical needs as well as your spiritual needs.

[mom4him]

Ugh, we have been in similar situations and it just stinks. At one time, we had to go to the ER every Sunday after church b/c fools in the nursery would not take simple precautions. I am so sorry you are being forced to leave a comfortable spot b/c people are not willing to show the true (sacrificial) love of Jesus to one of their own.

 

I am in a church now that does everything in their powers to accomodate my children. I hate that it's necessary but as the pastor said, if they can't show the love of Jesus to those with the special needs, who will?? They are truly the hands and feet of Jesus at my church. They express love in ways that is not convenient to them, but exactly what we need. Admittedly, we sit some get togethers out just to give them a break, but if we want to be included, there is an entire group of people who are in charge of making sure our needs are met. I pray you find a church that will be understanding of your physical needs as well as your spiritual needs.

It is so good to hear that there are churches/pastors out there that are willing to help more in these areas.

I am going to PM you with a couple of questions.

One thing I am determines to do is walk away from this without bitterness. It is difficult at times as both my husband and oldest son works there in jobs that they love. To keep the jobs they have to continue going to church there. My dh is 74 and I don't think he can handle the thought of job hunting at this point in his life. My ds has been working there now for I think about 18 yrs. He loves what he is doing and for the most part the people he works with.

[happygrrl]

There *are* churches that handle these issuse appropriately, both for the sake of members with issues but also to glorify God by making good choices environmentally. My uncle in TX teaches a Sunday school class specifically for adults with chemical sensitivities... they jokingly refer to themselves as the "canary class!"

[Wyndie]

It is difficult at times as both my husband and oldest son works there in jobs that they love. To keep the jobs they have to continue going to church there. My dh is 74 and I don't think he can handle the thought of job hunting at this point in his life.

 

Oh man, that IS difficult. I wonder if your husband could just honestly discuss all of this with the pastor. Since it sounds like the church has sorta washed their hands of your situation, I wonder if they'd make an exception for dh and ds to continue working there without having to attend weekly...

[mom4him]

There *are* churches that handle these issuse appropriately, both for the sake of members with issues but also to glorify God by making good choices environmentally. My uncle in TX teaches a Sunday school class specifically for adults with chemical sensitivities... they jokingly refer to themselves as the "canary class!"

There have been time that a 'canary' is what I have felt like. the thing with the canary is when it died the men knew enough to run the other way. It seems like in this case they all just go on like nothing is wrong. Of course I haven't died yet.:lol:

[mom4him]

Oh man, that IS difficult. I wonder if your husband could just honestly discuss all of this with the pastor. Since it sounds like the church has sorta washed their hands of your situation, I wonder if they'd make an exception for dh and ds to continue working there without having to attend weekly...

Well, not likely on either hand. My dh doesn't address anything he doesn't have to.:confused: He has done all he can to help make our home safe but it pretty much stops there. Much of their jobs are also tied up in the Sunday services too.

I wish it could happen that way though.

[nancy in nj]

Hi Sandy,

 

I am so sorry this happened to your family. My 14 year old daughter has been suffering with MCS for almost 2 years, but we just got the correct diagnosis in January. Sometimes it feels as if we are prisoners in our own home! This year has been really tough because a builder is doing a knockdown of a house nextdoor and all of the fumes in the air from the equipment and generators they are running have forced us to leave our home too many times to count. I would love to compare notes with you on treatment options (I'm not sure what NAET is, but would love to learn more) and other ideas. I will send you a pm.

 

Nancy

[buddhabelly]

I hope the NAET works for you. My son has had them and his life is much improved. One of the worst things for him was airplanes -- evidently whatever they clean airplanes with is just horribly toxic. Someday I'm sure this will change.

 

My son can even be around pets now. It's amazing.

 

One of his allergies turned out to be B complex vitamins, and since all day long he ate whole wheat tortillas, whole wheat bread, etc. --- curing him of this allergy was one of the most important. He was also allergic to iron (the nutrient) and his own braces. It was also helpful to clear him of these allergies, especially because he LOVES hamburgers. His braces are off now, but don't forget to get your child tested for things like polyester (clothing) and any braces or or fillings he may have.

 

Good luck!

 

Julie

[mom4him]

Hi Sandy,

 

I am so sorry this happened to your family. My 14 year old daughter has been suffering with MCS for almost 2 years, but we just got the correct diagnosis in January. Sometimes it feels as if we are prisoners in our own home! This year has been really tough because a builder is doing a knockdown of a house nextdoor and all of the fumes in the air from the equipment and generators they are running have forced us to leave our home too many times to count. I would love to compare notes with you on treatment options (I'm not sure what NAET is, but would love to learn more) and other ideas. I will send you a pm.

 

Nancy

Yes, Nancy, send me a note or if you want send to my email at mom4him48@yahoo.com

I totally understand the feeling of being a prisoner. That in itself can be very overwhelming.

[mom4him]

I hope the NAET works for you. My son has had them and his life is much improved. One of the worst things for him was airplanes -- evidently whatever they clean airplanes with is just horribly toxic. Someday I'm sure this will change.

 

My son can even be around pets now. It's amazing.

 

One of his allergies turned out to be B complex vitamins, and since all day long he ate whole wheat tortillas, whole wheat bread, etc. --- curing him of this allergy was one of the most important. He was also allergic to iron (the nutrient) and his own braces. It was also helpful to clear him of these allergies, especially because he LOVES hamburgers. His braces are off now, but don't forget to get your child tested for things like polyester (clothing) and any braces or or fillings he may have.

 

Good luck!

Julie

 

I am glad your son have gotten so much better. It is amazing how our body is made and the way we are able to heal.

We wear natural fabrics only. Even when ds was a baby he fussed when I would put synthetic fabric on him. That was back when I knew nothing about MCS.

NAET has truly been from God for us.

[mom4him]

You ladies have blessed and humbled me so today. I can not express how much it has meant to me to know that there are people who at least are trying to understand and in fact do understand. You have been a breath of fresh air.

I had a very wise person tell me one time that holding unforgiveness against someone is like eating poison, trying to kill your enemy. I determined last fall, after many tears and gnashing of the teeth, that I would not carry unforgiveness. I refuse to let this thing rob me of my peace. You have all helped me in carrying this out through this present situation.

Thank you!