telling child they need extra summer work

[EthiopianFood]

My niece is public schooled (doesn't live with me), and she struggles in math (likely a difficulty with abstract concepts, due to some level of FASD). She also loses a considerable about of reading ability over the summer, despite reading for fun somewhat regularly, to the point of needing intensive tutoring/pull-out classes to catch up (yet she is always caught up by the end of the summer).

 

This summer, I refuse to sit by and do nothing (she is in 3rd grade, almost 9 yo). I want to tutor her using MUS Foundations, and find something to use to keep her up with her reading skills (like I said, she does read for fun, but still loses half of her reading fluency), suggestions welcome.

 

How do I tell her I will be doing this with her without making her feel stupid or punished? I have yet to ask her how she feels she's doing in school, but she recently changed the subject immediately when I asked how school was going, and she was aware of a low test score in the fall, and said she "hated herself" over it.

[Stacy in NJ]

My niece is public schooled (doesn't live with me), and she struggles in math (likely a difficulty with abstract concepts, due to some level of FASD). She also loses a considerable about of reading ability over the summer, despite reading for fun somewhat regularly, to the point of needing intensive tutoring/pull-out classes to catch up (yet she is always caught up by the end of the summer).

 

This summer, I refuse to sit by and do nothing (she is in 3rd grade, almost 9 yo). I want to tutor her using MUS Foundations, and find something to use to keep her up with her reading skills (like I said, she does read for fun, but still loses half of her reading fluency), suggestions welcome.

 

How do I tell her I will be doing this with her without making her feel stupid or punished? I have yet to ask her how she feels she's doing in school, but she recently changed the subject immediately when I asked how school was going, and she was aware of a low test score in the fall, and said she "hated herself" over it.

 

I would just tell her that you want her to keep her skills sharp over the summer and to do that she and you will need to do a bit of school work together every day (weekdays). I don't know that you can soft sell that reality. What you can to is make sure you're approaching the work time with a positive attitude and encouraging attitude. Some gentle bribes or re-inforcements may help; a chart with stars, a prize bag with small toys or a bit of candy, tokens she can save up to "purchase" a better prize. Figure out what her currancy is; what does she really value? Trips to the mall to purchase nail polish? Does she have any collections? Ten tokens can purchase a trip to Dairy Queen. You get the idea.

 

HTH, Stacy

[MommyJo]

We are doing somewhat of the same thing with my niece when her father goes to Iraq her mom is bringing her down here to live a bit and she will be joining in on some of our classes. She's a lot younger so of course to "do school" she's excited. I would say your best bet is to make it fun and exciting. Tell her you would like her to see how much fun homeschooling can be and you want her to, I guess see what it's like for others? I know...not the best idea but I'm trying LOL. For reading fluency you could try the Victory Drill book. Or simply have her read aloud. I don't know how old your children are but you could make her the sort of 'tutor' if they do some schooling in the summer. Have her be the read aloud tutor and let her know what a big responsibility it is to help with the youngers.

If your children are too old for this, you could always just tell her it's fun learning time with her cousins? I greatly applaud the fact that you are stepping in to help her though. So many ps'd children forget what they know all summer....most the reason we homeschool year round. It's nice that she has such a caring aunt.

[Dobela]

I heard someone at a special ed conference say once that children with FASD have minds like sieves and that you just have to keep pouring it in until it stays. Unfortunately because of the holes in the sieve sometimes you lose as much as you put in. It will likely always be a continual process for her to learn and remember what she was taught. If she isn't wanting to do "school work" then maybe you can do unit studies and work in the main academics. I have always wanted to purchase the KONOS in a Box studies. Or, What is something that she likes? Cooking? Can you start there and add in math and reading in more real life activities that won't feel so much like school? I wouldn't make her be the only one doing school or make it last all day every day when family and friends are out enjoying the summer. That is where I think a fun unit study could be the way to go. Something different, but something everyone can work on together at their own level.