JennifersLost Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 WARNING - Raunchy content ahead. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! We've had lots of discussions about how to handle that week of the month when we're crabby, cranky, prone to crying and random fits of rage. And we've had lots of discussions about how to handle that week of the month when our friend comes to town and all we want to do is lie in bed with a hot water bottle and a pound of chocolate. But I don't think we've ever talked about how to handle that week of the month in which it feels like God or (insert diety/Mother Nature) has downloaded the entire Universe's imperative to be fruitful and multiply into YOUR loins and you're walking around wondering if your aura is flaming like a beacon. I mean, we all have plenty of kids here; I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one with a "drive", but am I the only one here who does NOT need to take her temperature to know when she's ovulating? Am I the only one who during that certain week finds herself thinking the cartoon heroes are kinda hot while watching videos with her kids, or wishes Anne and Gilbert Blythe would just HOOK UP already? Am I the only one who during that certain week wants to pitch homeschooling to the wind and farm the darn kids OUT so she can just get to it with her dh? Am I the only one who during that certain week hopes to GOD no one can read my mind while I'm out and about running errands because it would be enough to get me arrested? Oh, and this one's kind of particular to me, but during that certain week whatever I'm writing veers waaaaaaaay the heck over toward the harlequin romance category so that the next week (during those cranky moments of rage) I have to DELETE half of it (and kill the hero for good measure). Heh-hem. (Throat clearing). Not that I want this lovely feeling to exactly go away, mind you. But is there no middle road? No pleasant buzz that could just last the entire month rather than these excessive highs and lows? Tell me I'm not the only one. :eek: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OnTheBrink Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 I have no idea what you're talking about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
j.griff Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 The highs and lows ARE The balance, dontcha see? ;) At least, that's the way things are for me right now. I am internally half black, and half white- there is no white spot in my black side and no black spot in my white side- no yin yang, LOL, and no grey either. Just black or white, depending on what day/week/time of day/time of month it is. :D That makes me balanced. Some people are balanced by being all grey. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Nope, there is no balance. We have lots of mommy and daddy quiet time during that week ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Roflol. No. You're not the only one. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle T Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 or better yet, I wish DH would have a week like that! :D Michelle T Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted February 29, 2008 Share Posted February 29, 2008 Well, now that I've picked myself up off the floor, wiped the spittle off my screen, and apologized to ds18 for interrupting his viewing of Family Guy... I can say I understand. I really do. I really, really do. Gray's a crappy color, anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 1, 2008 Author Share Posted March 1, 2008 I was going to recommend Chaste Berry to you, but then I read on. I wouldn't give it to dh - I suppose there's some other good herbal recommendation for him..... But I'll tell you, after suffering a year from heck last year with every manner of female complaint imaginable, taking Chaste Berry daily has really helped. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peek a Boo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 heh-- I'm kinda like that all month long, lol.:cool: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Peregrine Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I call that my preservation of the species mode. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrscopterdoc Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 You are SO not the only one! And what really bites is when dear hubby is halfway across the world and not due home for weeks! Let me tell you, cyber chatting is *not* cutting it! I feel your pain girlfriend! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 1, 2008 Author Share Posted March 1, 2008 Peek, honey, I KNEW you were going to say that! Could this possibly be what men feel like all the time? I mean, you know, it's all over the place, right? But then there's that WEEK..... And Mrs.CopterDoc, I don't know how you do it. I once saw an educational film about elk, I think it was, and male elk prefer to collect a harem. Anyway, the male elk has to continually circle around and around his womenfolk, because if he stops watching them for a moment they'll start drifting away to find...um...greener pastures, so to speak. I've come to believe that human men are similar. Not so much in the harem thing, although some of them seem to like that too, but in the "sticking close" sense. I swear when we're out on the town dh is scanning the room for potential threats to his herd of one (that would be me.) and it would give him a fit to have to leave town and leave me behind. Don't get me wrong; I'm being silly here. I know you would never stray - your love and respect for your dh rings out loud and clear on your avatar. In all seriousness, it must be very hard to have the man you love so far away. Oh, once again I hope I never, ever meet any of you in real life, LOL! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dangermom Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Bwahahah! Yeah, that's a little familiar. But I have to say that this pendulum-swinging thing is better than when I was on the Pill and it took a lot of work just to relax. It would be nice if I could just spread it out over weeks instead of this cyclical thing... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bess Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one with a "drive", but am I the only one here who does NOT need to take her temperature to know when she's ovulating? LOL... That was funny. No, I don't need to take my temperature either. :) I think that week gives us just a little *taste* of what men have to deal with ALL THE TIME. Honestly though, even though, yes, I do get like that somewhat during ovulation, it's pregnancy where those hormones go really wild... I almost feel like a man then (in that way). Am I the only one???? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 WARNING - Raunchy content ahead. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED! Am I the only one who during that certain week finds herself thinking the cartoon heroes are kinda hot while watching videos with her kids, or wishes Anne and Gilbert Blythe would just HOOK UP already? Tell me I'm not the only one. :eek: Or Bob and Wendy??:eek: C'mon, Bob! Kiss her already!:rolleyes: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Dominion Heather Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Ahhh, yes.... "Let's get it on" I don't need the thermometer, either.:cool: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tonia Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Ahhh, yes.... "Let's get it on" I don't need the thermometer, either.:cool: GREAT! ;) Now THAT song is stuck in my head. . . :rolleyes: sigh . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JennifersLost Posted March 1, 2008 Author Share Posted March 1, 2008 Are we talking BOB THE BUILDER?!?!!!! ROFL! That's hysterical! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 You are SO not the only one! And what really bites is when dear hubby is halfway across the world and not due home for weeks! Let me tell you, cyber chatting is *not* cutting it! I feel your pain girlfriend! There are err...other things one can do to help relieve the tension. I once had to force a neighbor to order a device because she was *so* incredibly crabby!! She was much less crabby after that. :cool: My poor hubby, he barely makes it in the door from being away without being dragged off like he's a cavewoman ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peek a Boo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Peek, honey, I KNEW you were going to say that! Could this possibly be what men feel like all the time? I mean, you know, it's all over the place, right? But then there's that WEEK..... I dunno --it depends on the man....:cool: even when we were younger, i was the one who was more ready for action at any given time. Maybe I have a higher testosterone level than most gals, lol. I often remind dh [as he's chiding me for the kitchen being a mess] that my domestic skills do not extend to the kitchen. At least, nothing beyond the kitchen table :D as for ovulating, I think I've finally nailed it --there's a certain time ~once a month that i DO get on this HUGE cleaning/domestic kick for about 36 hours. I either scrub the kitchen cabinets, sew a plastic bag holder bag by hand, compulsively organize zillions of legos by size shape and color, alphabetize books on my bookshelf, or any other overly-detailed hands-on activity that I've been neglecting. so the sex drive doesn't really change for me, but other drives do.:rolleyes: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maria/ME Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Delightful thread...you are not the only one, it seems. I have to ask your age. Because, for me, this wasn't at issue so much until I was over 38 or so. Then everything that MOVED made me glad no one could read my mind! I was SO not like that. I never, well, "ogled" men in any way...now its' like anyone over 16 is fair game. I feel like a nasty old lady sometimes. My husband says its biological and scientifically proven that women over a "certain age" are at their peak. That would explain Ashton and Demi. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Delightful thread...you are not the only one, it seems. I have to ask your age. Because, for me, this wasn't at issue so much until I was over 38 or so. Then everything that MOVED made me glad no one could read my mind! I was SO not like that. I never, well, "ogled" men in any way...now its' like anyone over 16 is fair game. I feel like a nasty old lady sometimes. My husband says its biological and scientifically proven that women over a "certain age" are at their peak. That would explain Ashton and Demi. I'm 35 but I've always been this way. I swear if I didn't have such strong morals and high standards I would have been in trouble. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mamagistra Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 heh-- I'm kinda like that all month long, lol.:cool: Wha'? :eek: You?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mamagistra Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I swear if I didn't have such strong morals and high standards I would have been in trouble. It's nothin' to do with the Mike's now, is it? ;) (I'm still LOL about that...I need a bigger monitor! :D) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Julie in CA Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I *love* the good week, and wish it could last all the time. My poor dh is still bewildered, after 20 years of marriage. He takes the off weeks very personally. I just tell him that if it was a good week all of the time, it would lose it's "specialness"!:D ~Julie~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMindy Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 you mean like right now. And guess what, the kids are gone for the evening, dh and I are having a margarita and I'm getting off the computer right now!;) I've been planning and scheming all day!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 It's nothin' to do with the Mike's now, is it? ;) (I'm still LOL about that...I need a bigger monitor! :D) HA! maybe....:p Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 you mean like right now. And guess what, the kids are gone for the evening, dh and I are having a margarita and I'm getting off the computer right now!;) I've been planning and scheming all day!! :eek: I am all aghast! Have a great night, Mindy.;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Are we talking BOB THE BUILDER?!?!!!! ROFL! That's hysterical! Yes, ma'am!:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Valerie in Chicago Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 Because you are so truthful! I have to laugh, because yeah, there's the ups and downs throughout the month, but there's also the seasonal changes. When Spring comes, the sap is UP around here, and I can completely relate to your post. Wintertime? My policy is no s** below 70. Thus, poor DH is left to look for the space heater. So um, the kids didn't exactly float down the river in baskets...... And no, you are not alone......;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abbeyej Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 ...I have to ask your age. ... Um. I'm 29 (got a birthday coming up in April -- yikes!) and I've been this way at least since I was 17. Goodness help me if I get *worse* someday! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1bassoon Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 it's pregnancy where those hormones go really wild... I almost feel like a man then (in that way). Am I the only one???? Nope, I can sooo relate! I was always that way. And. . .WTMindy. . .WHY is your little dot still green??? Heh heh ;) Goodnight, everyone. . . .:D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tracey in TX Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 DH intentionally tries to not travel during Happy Week. (hmmm, wonder if his traveling during Grumpy Days is to get outta dodge?!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicole M Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 There was a book written, sometime in the early 1900s (I have a copy somewhere, I'll have to dig it up) -- it was called Married Love. Basically the author contends that women do have this cycle of desire (with charts and everyhing!) and that husbands need to just get a grip, deal with it, and just take a few days off from work every month and just service their wives all night and all day. I always thought that was a very good idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kat in GA Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I have hesitated to reply as I know a certain "somebody" IRL...but since she seems to be in this group too...why not. I have always thought I was the lone woman with this POV. And it's not at a certain time...but like some of you...all the time. Let me tell you my bagel story... One week at the choir that my children are in...some moms were commenting to the choir director on how good she looked...how great she looks after losing weight. The director responded that it was easy to lose weight because she was in love. On the one hand she could eat a bagel...on the other hand she could have some really good sex (well...she didn't actually say that...she used some euphamism that I can't recall...but her intent was obvious). The director walked away and one mom said she had been married for 19 years...and she'd pick a bagel...several others agreed. Then our pianist says that she's only been married for four months...and she'd still pick the bagel. Now...I am just standing there...listening and observing...there is no way I am going to add to this conversation...and I was quite sure at that moment that I was a freak! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 There was a book written, sometime in the early 1900s (I have a copy somewhere, I'll have to dig it up) -- it was called Married Love. Basically the author contends that women do have this cycle of desire (with charts and everyhing!) and that husbands need to just get a grip, deal with it, and just take a few days off from work every month and just service their wives all night and all day. I always thought that was a very good idea. Was it this book? http://digital.library.upenn.edu/women/stopes/married/married.html If so, it's in the public domain and we can all print off the relevant bits and leave them on our husband's pillow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicole M Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I do believe you've just rendered a wonderful public service to this board. Yes, indeed, this is the one. It's been well on 20 years since I read it. I just hope I haven't completely misrepresented the premise. If I was wrong, let's just pretend I wasn't, because if she didn't write what I presented in my synopsis, then she should have, eh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peek a Boo Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 and she'd still pick the bagel. hey! -- I can eat AND.... er, um, yeah. It's not an either or thing, lol. usually, anyway..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Audrey Posted March 1, 2008 Share Posted March 1, 2008 I mean, we all have plenty of kids here; I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one with a "drive", but am I the only one here who does NOT need to take her temperature to know when she's ovulating? You aren't the only one. You'll have to highlight below to keep reading because I don't want to inadvertently blind anyone with my potentially offensive advice below. Personally, I find copious amounts of nude frolicking to be a great remedy. I don't have a problem finding the time do it, nor the certain someone to join me, though. After the kiddo is in bed is a good time. Or, while he's off playing. It's got to be a bit warmer here, and I'm guessing for you, too. Might I suggest a good naked dive into a soft, fluffy snowbank with your partner? It is amazingly invigorating and very, very erotic (you wouldn't guess it, but it's true). Then you get your amazing goddess self inside with your partner and warm up in the position of your choice. You may even find that your imagination is invigorated by the snow! And, that would be it for my advice, which is probably not helpful in lessening your symptoms, but it will help you to channel that energy! ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*anj* Posted March 4, 2008 Share Posted March 4, 2008 Although it's the furthest thing possible from my mind right now, I totally know what you mean, Jennifer. During that week my name becomes "She Who Must Be Satisfied." Umm, yeah, tmi, right? :cool: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nicole M Posted March 4, 2008 Share Posted March 4, 2008 "She Who Must Be Satisfied." :cool: Goodness, there have been some wonderful "keepers" in this thread. "Choreplay" and "happy week" and "nude frolicking" (which I read as nude-some-other-word-that-starts-with-"f" and thought, well, uh, duh!) and countless other. You kids really do need to have a peek at that book I mentioned, Married Love, by Marie Stopes. I re-read most of it over the weekend, and it is fascinating. I did not grossly misrepresent the premise, as I feared, Mrs. Mungo, but I did misrepresent the tone, which is astonishingly gentle and bold at the same time. That woman was freaking brilliant. That book is a marvel. And one last thing. This thread appeared about at the same time as the one which read "what EXCITES you about homeschooling" -- and I thought, well, not the homeschooling, but the homeschooling mommies are sure helping me with... getting in touch with that which warms up the oven. And that's exciting, yes, ma'am. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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