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I am on year 27 of homeschooling, currently teaching our 14 and 16 yo sons, who are youngest 2 of six. Our 14 yo has HFA, along with OCD that kicked in at age 12. He is strong in math, currently doing Algebra. The wearying part is his attitude! He is often rude and disrespectful (not an issue with any of our other children), resists doing anything he doesn't want to do, and does not seem to be learning from consistent correction or having his main interest removed as a penalty (his screen time). This will sometimes cause him to comply, but is not bringing about an overall change in his attitude. I know part of it is his lack of "theory of mind"-he isn't able to see things from any one else's perspective. I am hoping part of it is immaturity and the whole hormonal upheaval of adolescence, and will improve as he matures. I would appreciate hearing from anyone who has walked through this, as l am becoming weary of the struggle. Perserverance is a strength for me, but l could sure use some hope that things may improve.
I've posted for years about my son. Today, I think I have a complete picture. We had him evaluated again in January, and today got the diagnosis of HFA (Aspergers). No real learning disabilities, though he is behind in math and writing/spelling. His verbal comprehension and spatial reasoning are superior, but working memory and processing speed are low. The evaluator's recommendations were to explore medication to help with anxiety and go to school. I will discuss meds and psych referrals with his doctor next week, but I don't think we are to that point yet. I want to keep working on self-awareness, exercise, controlling environment, etc. before we use meds, I think. She recommended school to help him learn social skills and have more structure, as well as get therapies that might be needed/available. She felt that keeping him at home would increase the gap in social skills between him and other kids his age. Thoughts? Are there others ways I could address these with him? We aren't totally against school, but my husband who is much like my son, hated it and isn't eager to try it. Finally, any advice on what to do now is helpful!