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Found 16 results

  1. Please help this tired Momma. Its crazy at home. I start with morning time. I play a nice song to get them to gather but they grumble and complain about leaving their toys. I read a devo and we do SOTW and maps. They like that. Move into math time. My 9, 7, 5 year olds do math sitting at a table but they all need my help and start interrupting me and each other. The baby is crawling around in the middle of this chaos getting into things. Finally put baby to bed and have to wrangle kids to get back to work. More complaining. 5 year old finishes and runs off to play. 7 and 9 year old complain he is too loud and they just can't think. 7 year old cries because she doesn't want to write. 9 year old is frustrated he doesn't understand math. Finally calm them down and we finish. Do English with 5 year old and begin with 7 yo. She cries again because she doesn't want to "do any more stupid work!" 9 year old is just bursting to go play with legos and can't understand why he can't just play all day. This is a sample of a typical day. It isn't at all what I thought homeschooling would be. I purchased a grammar program (MCT) that was I so excited to do with my oldest and he can't stand it. I am discouraged. I don't know what to do. Please give me advice. What works for you? I try to be kind but firm but usually lose it and start yelling at them. Everyday is full of grumbling and complaining and whining. We have a routine and the kids have chores they do every morning. But schoolwork is like pulling teeth. I'm ready to give up.
  2. I just read this article and am posting the link here, because I suspect some of you will find this very interesting. Another good reason to Home School or have your DC become Distance Learners, as my DD is. http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/02/25/lawmakers-push-to-end-scream-rooms-to-punish-students/
  3. http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/2013/10/08/11/41/father-not-sorry-for-publically-shaming-bully-son Saw a blip about this on the Today show. In light of the threads about the football player's house and lack of parents holding children accountable, I thought this pretty clearly represented a different extreme. A Texas man publicly shamed his 4th grade son for bullyiing by making him stand on a corner with a sign reading "I am a bully. Honk if you hate bullies." for an hour. A lot of people seem to think that all the dad taught the kid was that parents can be bullies, by bullying him with the public shaming.
  4. After a one day good start with my (rather) difficult 10-year-old, I noticed something was really wrong with my right eye....it turned out to be a detached retina! After a major eye surgery and TWO WEEKS face down for 90% of the time, I am now able to get up. I did continue to school him as much as possible, but he has now gotten the idea that this is mostly play. I am so discouraged right now...I would appreciate any encouragement or ideas. I really missed being at the computer and reading about everyone's experiences. What a wonderful group to be part of. Sorry if I am kind of whining about the eye thing, but it was scary and difficult..
  5. After a one day good start with my (rather) difficult 10-year-old, I noticed something was really wrong with my right eye....it turned out to be a detached retina! After a major eye surgery and TWO WEEKS face down for 90% of the time, I am now able to get up. I did continue to school him as much as possible, but he has now gotten the idea that this is mostly play. I am so discouraged right now...I would appreciate any encouragement or ideas. I really missed being at the computer and reading about everyone's experiences. What a wonderful group to be part of. Sorry if I am kind of whining about the eye thing, but it was scary and difficult..
  6. Hello Everyone, My husband and I feel the use of natural/logical consequences with our children is beneficial. Our oldest (5 yrs, 4 months) hit his brother i(2 years, 9 months) in the face this morning when his brother was whining. Yesterday, he scratched his brother's back that drew some blood when his brother stepped on his Lego creation. It's tough b/c I do understand that his brother needs to learn a consequence for knocking things down/destroying creations, but, at the same time, I am not sure how to teach that to younger brother. I would like them to figure out things together without getting physical. We are expecting our 3rd child any day now. I understand we are all dealing with changes in the home right now and I am doing my best, at 9 months pregnant, to meet everyone's needs and stay rested for labor/delivery/post partum. But this behavior is unacceptable. My instinct would be to spank him or make him uncomfortable, but I am not sure if that makes sense--- physical for physical. I did ask him, "How do you think your brother feels? How would YOU feel if that happened to you?" He at first told me he didn't "remember" what happened, then he told me that he would "like" it if that happened (sassiness). My heart is breaking--- for the 2 year old and for what our 5 year old must be going thru to behave this way. On top of that, I am just anxious with everything else going on right now. Thank you for any help/advice/tips!!!!
  7. In an earlier post (Beginning My Homeschool Journey) I talked about some of the struggles that I am having with my my four year old son. A friend has been trying to convince me to start "To Train Up a Child" by the Pearls. While I think that there are a few helpful aspects to that book, there was much in it that I found disturbing. But because I still, obviously, don't have that great of a handle on what I should be doing, it is hard for me to explain what it is that bothers me so much about the book, or what it is that I want to do instead. Do you have any thoughts about "To Train Up a Child"? Can you recommend any other books that might be helpful? I am not opposed to those that include spanking, but I want something that will help me focus on the positive, preemptive side of discipline so that hopefully I don't have to spank so often. I also need help learning how to stay calm and discipline with love with a boy that really knows how to push my buttons. Book suggestions would be great, but I would also love any advice you can give me from your own experience. Also, advice on how to address my friend would be great, because she is convinced that this book is pretty much THE WAY and I want to handle the situation kindly... Thanks guys, Emily
  8. at what point to you decide it's not working? I'm about to give up here. I have tried every approach it seems. My last resort is just to strew unit studies and FIAR books and read them randomly (to my preschooler but the others will hear it) and assign worksheets for the 3R's with rewards. I have 2 kids with somewhat special needs. My oldest is dx OCD/ADD and my 3rd child is just like him, so I know it's coming if I get her tested. No one wants to do school. yet no one wants to do unit studies projects either. I will try to implement ideas from the curriculum. My DS (5) will just flat out say he doesn't want to do it. My 8yo will do it but then only for about 5 mins. then he is done, he doesn't even know what he drew. Just did it to be done. No matter what I choose, we have done KONOS, HOD, tried ONLY doing the 3 R's & giving them more free time to pursue. mainly either one or all will just lay around the house. They do not want to do ANYTHING. I feel like giving up. At a certain point I do think a homeschooled child has to be somewhat a self-starter, don't you think? If they are guided in a certain direction? Doing the exact same worksheets every day, 4 or 5 days a week is really hard for me. I need a little variety. the problem is they don;t want to do either. I have even tried schooling/learning while we are out places lke the park programs. etc. no one likes them and they just want to fight all the time. it is really getting to the point it is basic defiance but who wants to FORCE their kids to do fun activities or even homeschool every day. i think I am ready to be done, but I have worked so hard to get this far. please help. I am confused. :(
  9. We just started HSing this year, with our 10 year old son (4th grade). We also have a 4 year old daughter who is in public preschool. She has a vision impairment and so after turning 3 (end of EI) she started an integrated preschool class in our public school, in afternoons. This year she is also doing several mornings a week in our homeschool co-ops with her brother. She is bright, quick, and very social. She also has very much a mind of her own! We are considering homeschooling her at some point in the future BUT: 1) vision devices may not be covered if she is not in school system and 2) she's very very active (wondering how hard it would be, esp as her brother is super bright but has attention issues and is better in quiet environments and wondering how it would be to handle the two together). And we are looking into overactivity and impulsivity So that's our background. But the question now is: Today she and two of her friends were apparently not listening (maybe in circle, not sure) and following directions in her preschool class. So she missed her outside time and stayed in to do math which she missed while she was "playing". This is pretty much how her teacher wrote in her daily logbook. I was wondering what you all think. Is this appropriate? This is the 2nd year she's had this teacher and she really has been a good teacher. My initial reaction though is YIKES! --isn't this really taking away recess, and when she's still in preschool? Especially if they are acting out perhaps they need the active time to settle. She's only 4 1/2, won't turn 5 until next August. I guess I'm sensitive b/c when her brother was still in public school he tried very hard and always good behavior but when he did not finish work he was held in from recess repeatedly. Even when he was also receiving OT b/c activity helped his attention issues. So what do you all think -- am I overreacting or is this appropriate? How could it have been handled differently? And...with our background, would you consider considering pulling her or continue working w/in school system and then afterschooling? Amy
  10. I posted earlier on the afterschooling board, but also wanted to post here. Am looking for more thoughts on how to approach this issue right now -- and also help in weighing what do do next year... We just started HSing this year, with our 10 year old son (4th grade). We also have a 4 year old daughter who is in public preschool. She has a vision impairment and so after turning 3 (end of EI) she started an integrated preschool class in our public school, in afternoons. This year she is also doing several mornings a week in our homeschool co-ops with her brother. She is bright, quick, and very social. She also has very much a mind of her own! We are considering homeschooling her at some point in the future BUT: 1) vision devices may not be covered if she is not in school system and 2) she's very very active (wondering how hard it would be, esp as her brother is super bright but has attention issues(no problem with behavior at all) and is better in quiet environments. Am wondering how it would be to handle the two together--he has inattentive/ADD and with her we are looking into overactivity and impulsivity. It would be like driving and braking (he needs to be revved up, she needs to be slowed down). So that's our background. But the question now is: Yesterday she and two of her friends were apparently not listening (maybe in circle, not sure) and following directions in her preschool class. So she missed her outside time and stayed in to do math which she missed while she was "playing". This is pretty much what her teacher wrote in her daily logbook. I was wondering what you all think. Is this appropriate? This is the 2nd year she's had this teacher and she really has been a good teacher. My initial reaction though is YIKES! --isn't this really taking away recess, and when she's still in preschool? Especially if they are acting out perhaps they need the active time to settle. She's only 4 1/2, won't turn 5 until next August. I guess I'm sensitive b/c when her brother was still in public school he tried very hard and always good behavior but when he did not finish work he was held in from recess repeatedly. Even when he was also receiving OT b/c activity helped his attention issues. So what do you all think -- am I overreacting or is this appropriate? How could it have been handled differently? And...with our background, would you consider considering pulling her or continue working w/in school system and then afterschooling? She does currently have an IEP and is special needs because of her vision, but is on par or ahead in most areas. Amy
  11. My husband and I are building a house and it's taking everything we've got (a loan from in-laws and our personal savings). So this year presents are lean--we keep saying the house is our present. It's not a complaint, just reality. My birthday is the same month as Christmas, so my husband has a hard time finding two sets of gifts anyway. This year he outdid himself. I have an antique rocking chair that's a family heirloom. The only heirloom I have. It was falling apart, so he had it reglued, sanded and revarnished. It looks beautiful, completely restored. It was fairly expensive (we live overseas and this kind of work is rare) and my only present for my b-day. Very special to me. This morning we discovered that our 6 year old son has scratched the surface of the rocking chair in several places (less than a month after we got it redone), many of the scratches in the shapes of hearts. A couple of weeks ago we saw him scratching the varnish off of a couple spots on my sewing table. We talked to him, he got his spanking, he apologized, we hugged and kissed and it was over. We thought he really understood he shouldn't have done it. We asked him when he did the scratches on the rocking chair and he said it was on the same day of the sewing machine incident. I don't know if I believe him. Neither I or my husband noticed it that day. And we've done family pictures in the rocking chair and I sit in it several times every day and never noticed it. I really don't know how to handle it. He says he's sorry, but I don't know if he understands how bad it was, how he ruined something new and precious (when anything new or nice is so rare when you're missionaries overseas). I don't want him to think that "things" are more important than he is, but he needs to realize what he did and the depth of it. It was hurtful, destructive and disobedient. We told him that we have to pray and talk about how to handle this so he doesn't ever do it again. My husband mentioned (privately) that we could let him open one of his Christmas gifts and then marr somehow it soon after, so he understands how it feels and will be considerate of other's possessions. I don't know if that accomplishes the goal or what it will do. We really have no idea how to handle this situation. He is such a sweet little boy, but his attitude has recently turned less obedient and more willful. He's been getting in more trouble lately. But I keep thinking--He's six, it's a phase we need to work through. Am I right? Please share your wisdom, experiences...(and please don't make this about the fact that we spank, that's our choice, it's based on conviction, and it's done with restraint, never in anger). Thanks!
  12. What has worked for you in taming the back-talk, disrespect, screaming, etc.? Ds is very verbal, which is good in someways, but sometimes he uses it to say horrible things or yell and scream. We have tried taking away screen time but he is incredibly stubborn, and his response was "Fine. I didn't want to watch T.V. anyway." We have had similar results with removing toys or legos. This is a kid who loves to stay home, so taking away activities would not discourage the behavior. We have tried a quarter system, where he earns quarters when we see desired behavior & speech, and then he loses quarters for talking back, arguing or yelling, and while he likes the system, it seems to have little effect on whether or not he actually does it. Meaning, he does feel regret when he loses a quarter, but it doesn't stop the behavior from occurring in the first place. I realize that it is February and that is undoubtedly part of the problem since the behavior has escalated in the past few days, but I am at my wit's end with this kid! I should also add that giving him "do overs" or making him practice proper responses (like calmly repeating what he should say 10 times) infuriates him even more in the moment and usually causes a larger meltdown. What has worked with your incredibly strong-willed kids to stop rude speech, back-talk, yelling, etc.?
  13. I have a 2.5 year old who talks back to me or yells at me. She speaks in a rude and disrespectful manner. Sometimes you cannot understand her. Often times it is followed by a temper tantrum. Someone mentioned to me using sassy spray (vinegar and water spray in the mouth) for discipline. Is this overboard? What would you do?
  14. Yes, that would be my son. He is 2.5 yrs. old and we recently completed our adoption. He was placed with us at 6 days old and left us for (2) two month periods when reunification was attempted. The first time was when he was only 2 weeks old but the second time was just before he turned two (April of this year - he turned two in May. He has always been challenging but as he has gotten older things have progressed for the worse. Since July, he has been on a hitting tangent. We deal with this every day. It controls the whole dynamic of this household. I even see my daughter (18 days older and also adopted - they have grown up together) changing. She has become defiant and her whole demeanor is different. This causes so much stress on top of his other issues (whining, destructive, in constant motion, etc.). Our house is in a state of chaos. We just had him evaluated through our agency provider and was told that his behaviors are normal and that he has the speech and cognitive skills of a 7 year old (he is extremely bright). I cannot accept that hitting all the time is normal. I try to engage him as much as I can but if I turn my back for one minute he is off to no good or hitting. It is really wearing on me. Have any of you been in this situation? Any thoughts, strategies, recommendations? Thank you from a weary mom! Lisa
  15. I am at my witts end. DD does not want to mind. Her handwriting is horrible and I make her do it over and over and still she won't do it right. She plays instead of doing school. She gives the answers wrong at times just because she is not trying (like telling me what time it is at 3:30 she said 20 60 or something like that.) She refuses to mind me. Half the time she is great other times she is horrible. I have no idea what to do. DH keeps talking to her and nothing is working. Dh said today she needs to go to PS. He has been saying this for awhile. He is afraid that she isn't learning since she is acting like this. I just want to cry I am so frustrated.
  16. During conversations on parenting, these two terms are often distinguished from one another. I have an idea in my own mind how these are different but would really like to here how *you* define them. More importantly, I'd like to see how these two terms differ, in practice, in your home. Thanks!
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