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happysmileylady

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happysmileylady last won the day on September 5 2018

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About happysmileylady

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  1. Noble intentions or not, please understand that if it happens that she isn't able to grow into a strong and capable adult, it won't be your fault. I was on the end of the close friend of the young struggling adult and my parents took in my friend and it's now 2 decades later....unfortunately my friend was not able to grow into a strong capable adult. And my mom doesn't like to discuss it but it does occasionally still bother her.
  2. I agree with the others that learning to drive is probably one of the first things she needs in terms of life skills. If you are in the position to do so, you might perhaps pay for her to go through a driving school. This will at least provide one additional degree of separation between her parents and your family that they don't seem to like. The next thing I suggest, help her save. I know these are her parents but I am thinking of a person preparing to separate from an unhealthy spouse. And building up a savings to provide the financial cushion to enable the separation is often a first step. It sounds like she already has bank accounts and that you are giving her a good place to land in a time of upheaval, so that's good. Continuing this, provide her with resources to help her learn to create a budget and stick to it.
  3. I am not much of a movie person and even less of a movie in theaters person. I think the last one I saw in theaters was Finding Dory lol. Well, keeping with the Disney theme.....Lion King is out July 19th. This is the ONLY thing I want to see in theaters this summer. I am ridiculously excited to see this movie and want to see it in theaters. Tickets don't appear to be on sale yet....but I don't know how to find out WHEN they go on sale. Fandango isn't giving me a sale date, just "sing up and we will alert you." Is there any other way to find out when these go on sale?
  4. Better...ish...today lol I had to kind of laugh...He got up at like quarter after 6 to get ready for work. So I got up, got myself some tea going and turned on the news while he showered. He comes out and is like "oh, I am sorry, did I wake you up? You can go back to bed now." He genuinely thinks that if/since I am at home, I don't need to get up that early. And this is not the only example, he has actually said, you shouldn't get up so early if you don't have to. I know he says this because neither of us are morning people-AT ALL- and if he didn't have to get up to go to work........he wouldn't. So he just doesn't understand getting up so early when you aren't accountable to a job or school lol. He just doesn't seem to understand that the stuff that needs to be done at home....it DOES take time. Which often means, getting up just as early as if I had to go to a job. In fact, sometimes earlier since I am preparing children to do THEIR job lol. A long time ago, I got fed up with him thinking there was more to be done than possible, so I started sending him an email every day with a list of what I got done that day. So something like *made the kids pancakes for breakfast *washed all the breakfast dishes, cleaned up the stove and froze all the extras *got DS6 showered, got the other two dressed *washed the bed linens, hung them, kids are putting together the beds now *picked up your meds at the store *school for the girls, math lesson for DS6 *took a walk with all the kids *called the doc to reschedule DD8's appointment *called your sister about the upcoming holiday plans *called the lawn guy And so on and so on. I had quit doing so after he got laid off and took over being the SAHP while I worked full time plus OT. After that happened he had a lot more understanding, but you know, maybe it's time to start doing so again lol.
  5. Good Morning! The only errand we have to do today is go pick up a script for DH. I am trying to decide if I should just get everyone dressed and go do that first, so that it's done and out of the way, or if I should wait until we have school done first. Probably the later.
  6. He didn't even have to DO chores A, B, or C....just make sure the kids did them! GAH! Ok, like I said, JAWM and it's just a vent. Venting helps me step back and look at things from a more objective standpoint so that when the actual discussion can actually happen, it's rational discussion. Because rational discussion just isn't possible after my face is recovering from an hour worth of dental work and being shot full of novacaine.
  7. I am not a great housekeeper, and I know that. I know you go to work every day and spend hours there and it's exhausting. I ask very little of you when you get home. But, if you really want to have a discussion about how I keep the house, it's probably best NOT to do that after I get back from the dentist. Especially when I said before I left-"Dinner is in the crockpot. Nuggets are in the freezer for DS6. Also, please have DD10 do A chore from her list, and have the other two do B and C chores." And once I get home, neither A, nor B, nor C are done, at least one of the kids didn't eat dinner and another told you he finished his when he didn't and you didn't even check. Oh, and the dinner you ate was rolled up tortillas and some leftovers in the fridge instead of what I planned and put together and had ready and piping hot for you. And especially after I have put together your lunch to take to work the next day, because you never would. I could go through a lot more, but I won't, because I know I have plenty of my own faults. And this is not a contest of faults. Just, next time you want to pick an argument, maybe think about the timing a little better. My teeth hurt, and I asked for very specific help in the care and keeping of the family and home because of that. Your timing's really bad.
  8. So, here's what ended up happening... First, when I went to grab flour out of the pantry I found that I had a single can of the golden mushroom soup...but not two. I don't quite know why, I don't use this stuff for ANYTHING other than this recipe. So I had a single can. SO what I ended up doing....I sauteed some onions in.....well, a lot of butter lol. Then I added the fresh sliced mushrooms to get them going. Then I added the flour. Then, some water and bullion cubes. I put all the rest of the ingredients in the crockpot, including the can I had, then once the mushroom stuff in he skillet became saucy like a gravy, I poured it all over the top of everything else. Turned the crockpot on low and let it go. Probably should have put it on high, the carrots didn't get as cooked through as I like, and I for sure noticed the difference in flavor not having that other can of condensed soup. BUT....I was the only one that noticed the difference, so that's a plus. I will probably still use the soup in the future, but this was good enough.
  9. Truthfully, that depends. Is the person snooping the young legal adult's parent, who is providing food, shelter, clothing, transportation and/or utilities for the young legal adult, and suspects that the young legal adult is participating in dangerous behaviors such as drugs, crime and/or other illegal activity. If such is the case, I do not believe the snooper is in the wrong. Is the person snooping, just randomly going through the young legal adult's stuff just to see what they could find, but without any real suspicions or reason to be responsible in anyway for any said suspicions? If that's the case, the snooper is 100% in the wrong. The person who writes a journal full of lies, not in the wrong in either case. If the person writing the lies has other intentions like trying to frame someone for legal trouble like writing that someone was seen committing a crime or something.....then the journal writer is in the wrong. But IMO that's separate from the motivations of the snooper.
  10. I direct my DD towards family. I don't have a problem answering questions from my own DD in a general sense....she's my kid, I was there for her first gyn appointment lol. But, if not me, she has her grandmother, who is "young-ish" for a grandmother. In addition, my mom plays a role in DD's life (that is different from the role she plays in my other kids lives) that is sort of a cross between second mom and wise older neighbor. BUT, beyond my mom, I have 2 sisters. Depending on which sister we are referring to, my sisters are closer in age to DD23 than DD23 is to one or more of her actual siblings. And this also gives them a somewhat unique position in terms of advice giving. So if she can't ask me, or I can't answer....she has others close to her that she can go to. Now, once my younger kids are adults....not so sure. I think my son will likely have a couple of cousins who he can talk things out with, but my girls....they only have 2 female cousins, one of whom is older and.................well I guess estranged is the best word, and the other female cousin is her sister, so although they are somewhat close now, I expect that to dissolve. And, their own sister is nearly 15 yrs older. Close, but still, it can be different in terms of closeness. NOW.....I will say that with DD23, when I felt the time was right, I gave her TCOYF which is a GREAT resource for much of the physical aspect. And, doing so did result in some questions that are not as well addressed in a book that's is pretty much physical/biological. ETA: Oh, um, also, I was always very open about our infertility journey and procedures and so on....and DD23 was becoming a teen through that, plus was a teen all through my pregnancies with the young kids. That can give quite a bit of education. AND, I will also say that I firmly believe that sometimes the answer to a question has to be..."that's really something you need to discuss with your spouse." Sometimes these questions are ones that just don't have answers except how that individual couple decides to answer it.
  11. You mentioned a babysitter.....will that person be there the vast majority of the time the child will be doing school.....just not capable of actually DOING the school? If so, then perhaps the mom might want to consider one of the online public like K-12 or similar. That way there are people there to teach him, he's got a class of sorts to attend, but he's not being subjected to the bullying and stuff. Then, when mom gets home, she could still help him with "homework" just like she would have if he had been in public school. And the babysitter can still be someone who says "hey kiddo, time to log on, if you need help getting the computer going let me know, but it's time for school now." If there's no babysitter there, yeah I agree with others that having a 9yr old home alone and expecting him to teach himself, even without special needs, it's not really going to work.
  12. I could do that. Would I then use that instead of the broth and canned soup in the recipe? Hmmm, or maybe use the stock in the gravy, but water and bouillon cubes in the recipe...
  13. I have a dentist appointment this evening, at 5, should take about an hour. Which means dinner tonight is a crockpot meal. I am using a version of this recipe for Meatball Stew, plus making some bread in the bread machine to go with it. I actually already have the meatballs all made and they are sitting in the freezer. Since I am using baby carrots, all I need to really do is chop up the potatoes and dump everything in the crockpot, then just turn it on low. The problem is............I totally forgot to put the golden mushroom soup on my grocery list! ACK! I have homemade beef stock that I am using in place of the canned beef broth. Is there anything that I can use to sub for the golden mushroom soup? I have sliced fresh mushrooms, I still have beef soup bones and probably anything else I would need, but I don't know where to begin to make this sort of substitute. Anyone have any ideas?
  14. Ok, good, I am glad I didn't upset you. I can totally understand how just cause you speak the same language, that doesn't mean all the nuances are totally clear. I have felt that way just travelling in the deep south. I suspect that actually living there would probably have a very similar effect.
  15. So, I was going back in my planner, and realized that....I miscounted. We don't have as much of school left as I thought! Yay! I think we are going to finish out the books we are in or get to a good stopping place and then just call it good. Besides, we aren't doing any moving this summer, there's no planned renovations on this house, and so far, most of our planned summer stuff is on the weekends so I can get some summer schooling in this summer. Which the kids won't like, but I will try to do more fun stuff. We have GOT to get some memorization in.
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