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happysmileylady last won the day on September 5

happysmileylady had the most liked content!

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About happysmileylady

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  1. Aww, it's got to be hard to really wish it was your mom who was visiting for your special days instead and having to have someone that just doesn't feel like your family there instead.
  2. Assumptions and family culture probably. My kids spend the night with my parents a couple of times a year, without me or DH. And as such, when my kids are there, of course my parents have to take on a bit of a parenting roll. In addition to things like potentially disciplining should one of them misbehave (and sometimes happens when kids are, ya know, kids lol,) there are also things like making sure that they pick up the toys before they go to bed, making sure the teeth are brushed properly, being asked to help clean up in the kitchen even though they didn't make the mess, etc etc. I don't expect them to automatically shut that off just because I happen to be in the same building. I don't have a problem at all if I am in the kitchen cleaning up and my mom tells one of the kids to come help me clean up, or corrects another on when they same something rude. And really, even if she gently contradicted me on something small (such as "oh, it's just one more cookie" or "lets just finish this last episode," it honestly doesn't bother me. Because it's not like that sort of thing goes on every day, day in and day out. When I was a kid, the first thing my grandma did when we all walked in the house was make every single grandchild milkshakes (to order lol). But, since we only saw them like 3 to 5 times a year, it wasn't like grandma was stuffing us full of triple butterfinger and M&M milkshakes every day.
  3. Oh, I totally agree that the biggest problem I can fully see in the OP is that grandma just up and bought airline tickets without checking with anyone. I mean really, that just seems like it should be common sense....what if the family had decided to go visit the OP's family and had already bought their airline tickets. Generally, it's probably good for all folks in these situations to try to start from a place of patience and an assumption of good intentions. And since we don't know much from the OP other than grandma bought tickets without checking with the OP, and that two of her kids think their grandma is bossy ( to just paraphrase,) I think it's wise to start withe the assumption that grandma isn't toxic or NPD or a rude selfish witch, but rather didn't think much ahead, or perhaps there was a miscommunication between the OP and her DH and her DH's mother.
  4. You say that as if the DIL in the situation is always the reasonable one. These relationships are always a two way street and sometimes the grandma isn't doing anything to make herself unwelcome. Sometimes, it's the DIL who is unwelcoming, difficult to get along with, rude, etc. (and sometimes it's the son in law, I know of that situation too.) And it's really tough on grandparents who are loving and reasonable and want relationships with their grandkids (and their own adult children) but the adult child's spouse is the one who is difficult or even toxic.
  5. happysmileylady

    Lighthearted poll about addresses envelopes

    Couldn’t vote. I would put “The Smiths” or “The Smith Family.”
  6. Except my phone lets someone take picks without unlocking. Just swipe it to the side and the camera comes up lol
  7. I went to send a pic to dd22. I discovered 33 of these images on my phone
  8. happysmileylady

    Help Planning Party

    I think that sounds perfect. Add in a veggie plate and a bread or cracker plate with your variety of dips and I think you would be good to go.
  9. happysmileylady

    Help Planning Party

    If it's going to be at 6pm, and there will be enough drinking that you are anticipating people staying over, then I think you need to have dinner. It doesn't need to be big or elaborate, but people will likely anticipate that there will be food and not have dinner before. And then drinking on an empty stomach can intensify the effects and you might end up with more folks staying than you anticipate. Depending on the formality of it, you could do something as simple as a selection of sandwiches, and pasta salads. You could do a baked potato bar with all sorts of baked potato toppings. Or you could do something bigger with like a big ham or roast, seated dinner with sides, rolls, etc.
  10. No, you aren't the only one.
  11. What about a set of ham sandwiches before the church thing, then, a total junk food dinner after you get back, completely with a selection of Christmas movies like Rudolph, Frosty, etc. You could do cheap and junky stuff like pizza rolls, buffalo wings, loaded fries, etc.
  12. 😀 Oh he was fine. And the rest of the kids were great too. I sent a text last weekend, but again, if you need anything this next week, let me know!
  13. happysmileylady


    Forgive my bluntness... This is not "bad behavior." You have a child who is throwing things, and physically assaulting family members. I understand that you have older kids who are also challenging, but this is not a "sweet kid" who is making a few wrong choices. I think there are issues here. Since other kids have challenges, are there therapy situations going on that include this particular kid? If not, you might want to head that direction. He could be reacting to the fact that his other siblings have so many issues, or to how much attention is being given to those issues...or there could be other issues at play. I think you need to see some professional advice.
  14. happysmileylady

    A question for the dog people here

    Thanks. I have had cats and dogs and tried super hard to make sure that our seating surfaces were free of pet hair when people arrived. I didn't always succeed (at one point we had 3 cats and 2 dog....that's a lot of pet hair.) But most of the time when people came over there was a seating surface that was generally hair free. My SIL on the other hand.....there's never a pet hair free place to sit in her house unless you sit ON the dining room table. She has 2 huskys The other night, I went to a girl scout cookie mom training/seminar sort of thing. It's basically a run down of how the process of managing the troops cookie orders and inventory works. It was super casual, in the front room of the service unit cookie lady's house. Exactly what I would expect for that sort of thing. Service unit GS mom has a dog, who was SUPER well behaved. He was some sort of mutt, short haired, and happy to see everyone who walked in the door but also calm and unobtrusive in spite of his size (think, fat dalmatian size, though for sure not a dalmatian.) Anyway, I had no problem with the dog. What sort of frustrated me was, there was no place to sit that didn't have dog hair all over. I tried to pick the chair that had the least amount of dog hair, but I still came home covered in it. I was a bit annoyed that I came home looking like we had 3 cats and 2 dogs still......after 2 hrs at a home with a single dog. I washed my coat and clothes when I got home, like I do when we leave SILs house, and ultimately no harm done so I am not angry or anything....really, even over the initial irritation. I am kind of worried about dog hair on cookie boxes.
  15. happysmileylady

    Help, friend called and said husband just left her

    I have never been divorced, so take this for what it's worth... But my thinking is that if she takes all the money out and holds it, she can give it back if court proceedings say she has to. If HE takes it out, she has no control over what happens to it and will probably have to fight for it. Even if she has to spend it on groceries or medical bills or whatever.....she has control of all that documentation. I think that's probably more important in a situation like this.
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