Ok I understand what you are saying, but part of me feels like as a friend, I should try to talk to her first. My husband's role as a mandated reporter aside, shouldn't my role as the friend be to address with her what I see? Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I don't know why he's not reporting it ... he expressed anger over the situation to me later and I gave him information on the history of this woman and her kids. He didn't say much else about it, so I don't know that he's not going to report it, I guess.

I would try to make amends with visits outside of Thanksgiving. Making amends with your aunt doesn't mean accepting what your brother did as right, it means loving your aunt. If your aunt isn't willing to love you back without you bringing your daughter into the home of a child molester, then she's the one who isn't willing to make amends. I would be honest again, because it can't mess things up more than they already are, and tell your mom and aunt the reason you won't be coming but express love and a desire to have a good relationship outside of that issue. :grouphug: :grouphug:

Short story - if you were to see a friend do something with her child as a means of discipline that made you uncomfortable would you say something to her or not? Longer story - 4 year old child spilled a whole glass of water at an event after giving mom fits all evening. She marched him outside the building and left him alone, in the dark, in the cold (low 40s) without a coat, on the sidewalk, and came back in to clean up the water. She was probably 30 feet away from the door and could see him peaking through the window and kept repeating - "I can see him, he's fine". She told me specifically that he was safer outside than in right now. When another man got up to go bring the child inside, mom ran to cut him off, telling him it was fine, and brought her child inside. (Child was still acting out against mom, but then was fine for the rest of the event) My husband is a mandated reporter and was quite frustrated at the situation. This kid has a history of really severe behavioral issues (including biting other kids) and mom is rarely approached. When she is approached, she gets extremely defensive to the point of refusing to talk to the other person, sometimes for months in retaliation. This mom has come to me for some help with "boundaries" with her kids, but I can tell she's got a lot of anger and frustration and is not really very open to change, she more wants to use me as a place to complain and have someone tell her how right she is to be angry with her kids. I refuse to do so, which means she'll go for a week or more at a time not talking to me (when we see each other regularly). Should I say something about how she handled this discipline issue with her son knowing she'll likely get angry about it? Or should I let it go?

It's hard for me to really get it because the clothes feel soft to me, but wool is itchy to me so I guess that's the same idea. And at this point if he's uncomfortable in all his clothes it might explain his difficult behavior and I desperately need that to continue to improve! And if cotton socks are all that's needed to get him to put shoes on, by all means, put on cotton stocks!!! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

So this would probably also explain why he hates pjs, and then dislikes sleeping in his bed even after I relent and allow him to sleep without clothes. And why he hates socks with a passion. Hmmm... Feeling optimistic now... Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

wow, ok thanks, I don't experience this at all, so it's super helpful to know what it feels like in words! I'm going to try to change up his wardrobe this weekend!

My son has sensory issues and we are working with an OT through them, and have seen huge improvements with tactile defensiveness. Still not all the way there but huge strides. Anyway, he has had this thing about taking his pants off all the time, saying they "bug" him. I've been frustrated that we've made so little progress with him tolerating clothes so I had the bright idea yesterday that maybe something in the fabric is bothering him since the "softness" of the pants doesn't seem to help. So I found clothes in his drawer that are 100% cotton instead of a cotton/polyester mix and he's not taken them off for 2 days now. (huge! he usually lasts a couple hours before he's itchy and takes them off) And these are relatively new cargo pants instead of sweats, so they aren't softer, just made of all cotton instead of a blend with polyester. He doesn't develop a rash or anything, but says the other pants make him itchy, so could it be a legitimate allergy to the polyester since the cotton pants aren't bugging him?

We have been using 4GCommunity for our internet connection and received notice today that we will not have internet connection as of Nov. 30 or sooner, and that there are no refunds coming for prepaid months. (we are paid through January). Which means we are out of internet (soon) and the money, and with no explanation. We have extremely limited funds for internet and very limited options in our rural area. We don't use cable, but use internet... anyone know of any other reliable internet options that are less expensive than Xfinity or Dish Network?

This is encouraging for me! I know I can't count on my Daughter being an avid reader after we get over this hump, but knowing others have is encouraging! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yes, this is a good point... Sometimes we need to acknowledge the problem is there instead of turning a blind eye and assuming the issue is within the childs control, or that it is normal behavior. It's a difficult line to walk and inappropriate expectations in any direction are unhelpful. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yes, she can copy single letters, she recognizes all her letters as well, but I've not tried dictating letters. She can also write her name. She balks at just about everything I've tried to get her to do... she does not even like to have me write for her, so I have her tell me her "dreams" each morning, which has gotten to be quite an involved story telling time. She does like some coloring, but not drawing and she does not really care much about keeping in the lines when coloring but at least uses a variety of colors!

So what would you substitute? Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Thanks, that's a great suggestion! The reason we would need to skip the memorization portion of WWE is due to a working memory problem and not related to the writing modifications needed. Right now my priority is getting her to read and avoiding the "I hate all things related to learning" attitude. I just need to add things in slowly, I think. We spend a lot of time in make believe games that have her using language because the organization of language is hard for her. I have been focusing on only reading and math, and took a chance on the tracing work yesterday and it went over so well that I just wanted to capitalize on that and make writing part of her day as well.

Well, no, not an ot suggestion... She cries and refuses to copy anything, but was willing to trace words yesterday in a Columbus activity. Using words she can spell is a great idea because it would also help reinforce reading...yes we've done a lot of writing in sand, that was pretty much how we learned the letters and practiced them all last year. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I found out yesterday that DD6 needs a writing level where she is tracing words... no copying yet, just tracing, but more than just letters., so now I'm realizing that I don't have to forgo writing altogether, just back it down to her level. The problem is all the "learn to write" resources I have already (WWE, maze writer, Brave Writer and a K level cursive workbook) aren't quite at her level. Would you suggest that I modify WWE 1 so that she's tracing the sentences instead of copying them? (But then we'll have to skip the memorization too...) or is there a resource that doesn't jump straight from copying letters to writing words without tracing? Maze writer only has her copying letters, I need it a little more advanced than that, but not sure whether I need to make my own or if there's something already at that level done for me?

But do teachers have the option of disagreeing? Or is this systemic mandates? I used to teach in the public school system years ago... I could never go back because I couldn't do what the system required me to. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I agree...it is cruel to both the parent and the child. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

A dear friend of mine who doesn't homeschool came to me to tell me that she found out that her 5 year old kindergartener is "behind" in reading according to her public school teacher... after just 6 weeks of school. How exactly does a 5 year old get behind after only 6 weeks of school??? (She picks the books with only one word per page to take home to read........) And the mom is blaming herself for not putting her in preschool! This is a kid who can sound out some words, knows most of her letter sounds well, and can copy a sentence very well. (and the frustration there is that she cannot write a sentence without a sample to copy... not trace, just copy) In the meantime my 6 year old 1st grader is still on page 69 in phonics pathways, (because I can't afford Barton level 2) just finishing up the sh, th, and other similar blends with short vowels only. We are making painfully slow progress but PROGRESS none the less. But we are not yet to the point of even copying words... but letters in isolation are written beautifully. THIS is why I homeschool. Because putting my 6 year old in public school would be throwing her to the wolves who have the nerve to tell parents that after 6 weeks a 5 year old can be behind in reading!!! It makes my heart hurt. :(

I tend to second guess myself on everything school related, especially when it comes to how MUCH to accelerate my 4th grade 9 year old. Her psych testing when she was 6 was a joke and without the money to have her retested, I'm often flying in the dark, trying to feel my way through to what areas are her strengths. I took a chance a couple weeks ago and started using the College of the Redwoods prealgebra text with her, for a number of reasons, but mainly because it was free for me to use and so if it was a big miss, I'd not be out any money. She's always resisted math, saying how much she dislikes it, but blowing through concepts like there's no tomorrow. I held her back a lot because of fact fluency issues. Yesterday we hit the lesson on adding and subtracting integers - big long hairy problems with negative numbers subtracted from negative numbers back to back. Half-way through her practice problems she came running up to me - "mom! look at this exciting one!" It was one of the longer ones assigned. Reviewing a couple incorrect answers together later she was eager to rework them (no bad attitude over wrong answers for once!), and then yesterday afternoon she brought out the paper again to work out the problems I didn't assign, telling me how interesting they are! She even brought them in the car to work on when we went to grandparents for dinner. It might not last past this unit, but at least she's learned that she can enjoy math!!

Thanks!!

We are using An Introduction to Astronomy, Understanding the Universe from Great Courses for a much anticipated science course and while my daughter is fascinated and glued to the screen and can answer every review question after the videos, I feel like it is not as "full" of a course as I'd like with no additional assignments/output required. Has anyone paired this with something else? Added something to this? How do I fill this course out some for her? I tried searching the forums but couldn't find anything. I thought about just getting a handful of the other recommended books, but fear that's money spent on interesting books but not accomplishing my goal. (and while I would be the first to spend money on interesting books, I am on a pretty limited budget).

Ok so with everyone's helpful comments I'm thinking through my expectations again and thinking that a lot of what we did for K might continue to work this year - especially if I look at it from the perspective that the language is the issue. (Which makes sense, because she'll do math for me, but there's very little language there right now) For history resort to the "public school" method for lower elementary that was how they did it when I taught, which was to hit every major social studies holiday and let that suffice. she really doesn't like listening to anything longer than a picture book, so I might have to play around with some books to see if I can find something she'll listen to while she plays. I'll just give grammar up for now, and instead of jot it down or WWE, I'll stick to a single line of handwriting a day, keeping it to letters and single words rather than sentences. I'm not going to stress over music, and she'll get art as life happens (and I can always put art into social studies projects...) Her main way of playing is almost always role playing and having all these conversations between her toy friends, etc. This is probably more valuable from a language perspective than any formal school work right now if language is what is at the root of this issue.

She's had slp intervention with a prompt therapist. Her screening showed early signs for dyslexia and expressive language delay. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I'm short on time right now and will read this more in depth later, but thank you for your suggestions. Another layer of potential issue is that her 4 year old brother is nearly at the same level as her in some areas (and he is very auditory so if he hears it, he learns it) and is difficult to send away to play. I've started trying to spend individual time with each but I wonder if that impacts her willingness to try too. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk