TerriM
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Posts posted by TerriM
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23 hours ago, nwahomeschoolmom said:
Totally agree!
I have always thought I must be ADHD or something because I space out so much, but maybe this is why....I never paid attention in school and I now have terrible listening habits. I went to a "top school" for undergrad and really struggled because, among other things, I was not in a habit of paying attention. I could still have a touch of ADHD, but being able to stare out the window half the day sure didn't help!
Hmmm. Good point. I do wonder if my son has something "diagnosable.". He was already ignoring us to some extent, so maybe it's not really related, but it sure doesn't help when a kid can zone out and still do the work and think they're perfectly fine/smart because they can do it themselves.
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Better to have a social life than none at all. But you might see if the other parents have the same frustration about their kids playing videogames all the time. Hard to do anything about the parents that don't care, but if you are all on the same page, then you can band together and make rules.
PS: One difficulty for me has been that having my kids socialize with each other can be worse than the videogames if they're fighting. It's gotten better recently, but at some point it was easier to have them play videogames than hear the fights over why what one person did in the LEGO world wasn't ok and how someone wants their person alive again and how someone borrowed a LEGO in exchange for this other one and then the other person wants it back...... ugh. it's hard to mediate arguments in a fantasy world.
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Gosh I'm jealous.
Although my kids seem to be happy with their lot. They have super-mega lego-land in the living room. I'd like to kick them outside, but the setup isn't so great.....
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4 hours ago, SeaConquest said:
I don't think I'd survive two weeks of incessant whining. Mama's got finals in 2 weeks! Lol.
Neither would I which is why they spend a lot of time on the TV. :(
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39 minutes ago, SeaConquest said:
One thing I struggle with is the electronics. My DH and I are technophiles ourselves, so it is likely not surprising that our kids spend an inordinate amount of time on electronics (as do all of their friends). Even if I wanted to allow them the time to explore and be bored, by enforcing screen time restrictions, they would just end up playing video games at all of their friends' houses. How do you enforce this and create space for the kids to be bored? (Mine have zero tolerance for perceived boredom at present.) Mind you, we live in a very small space (the boat or RV), with no backyard of our own, in a very urban environment.
Ditto. What I've heard is that you take the devices away and let them simply be bored. After two weeks of incessant whining they figure out other things to do.
As for going to their friends houses...... I guess mine don't have that option without me driving them, but.....at least they're socializing? sort of?
I've kinda of given in. At this point, my oldest is watching a ton of youtube videos, half about videogames, half educational. My middle actually spends a lot of time doing animation. My youngest whines horribly and then asks to help with the housework.
The ban only lasts a couple of hours though.
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From the New Yorker article: "There’s the same agonizing question of American achievement: What can we learn, in a society dedicated to high-achieving children, from children who seem “naturally” off the charts in their achievements? How can we make our children less anxious while still making sure that they achieve?"
Deep breath. The most important achievements in life are getting a job, buying a house, supporting your family, saving for retirement, treating people kindly, being charitable, and being happy. Maybe kids would be less anxious if they understood what the purpose of their work really is and realized that most of those achievements are reachable by the average human being.
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There is definitely a huge difference between a kid driving himself and a parent driving him.
If your son is driving himself, just make sure he's healthy (exercise/eating) and has a bit of breadth to go with the depth (a B&M school will handle that for you).
If you are driving him, then you need to worry about whether he cares about the goals that you have for him and how hard you are pushing him and having a balanced childhood.
I think letting a kid set goals is great if they have high aspirations. I don't like to deter them from thinking big, but every year, or maybe even every couple of months, they need to reevaluate their direction. What are their highest priorities as they grow in life? What has to be sacrificed to achieve them? At some point he'll be mature enough to figure out that either the goals are out of his reach and he has to choose one or the other, or that he's happy not with being #1, but simply "very good" at both, or he might even have a new goal in life to replace both.
I don't like to tell kids not to think big. But I do like to make sure that they understand that achieving goals are the result of hard work. I think the best thing is to ask him what he wants to accomplish and help him be practical about how to achieve it. I'd let him choose, but don't stick him now into one of these paths. Reevaluate each year.
My kid used to want to do well on the AMC math contests. Now he wants to publish a videogame and get a job for early investment, and cares a lot less about the math contests. It's his life, and these are worthwhile goals, so as long as he's actually working towards them (and not watching TV all summer), then my job is to support those. I *have* though insisted that if we're paying for lessons, he needs to make good use of them, or he needs to drop something.
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17 hours ago, HTRMom said:
I think I’ll continue our reading lessons, anyway. Reading will be such a boon for his curiosity and imagination. Plus, I’m having too much fun watching him learn to quit! Surely a kid who reads fluently could be allowed to read quietly during reading lessons. At least you would hope.
There are pros and cons. The pro is that when it comes time for reading books, they're able to go off on their own. The con is that because they can read, they learn to block out the teacher when the teacher is leading them through worksheets--which for some schools is multiple hours a day. It can become a real problem later because the kids are in the habit of blocking out voices around them. They learn to ignore both teachers and parents and may have a harder time remembering multiple step commands. They may also bomb IOWA or other tests where you have to listen to the instructions. We had some *very* interesting IOWA scores come back for the kid that learned to read before Kindergarten. Most parts in the 90s, but one part was in the 23-30% range--that was the part where you had to listen to the instructions. In later grades, teachers will report that the kids aren't listening or paying attention.
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2 hours ago, lewelma said:
In my experience, the problem is not two passions at once, but rather music in particular. I know of kids who are pointy in two areas, one of ds's friends went to the IMO and the IOI national camps (and they were in B&M school). But the moment you throw music in, you have to rehearse typically somewhere you have to drive to. So it is not just studying on your own, but rather practicing with your accompanist or group, typically multiple times a week. It is all lessons, rehearsals, and recitals that are just so crazy time consuming and tiring. I said that my ds is at a National *level* in music, I did not say that he competes. He is at the level that he *could* make it in to the National Youth Orchestra, and his teacher has asked him to, but he doesn't have time to do it.
I think it's really important to look past the school years. Music is a life-long endeavor. Any time put into practicing has a life-long benefit. Once you've reached a certain level, you can play in a band, or a nightclub, or your best friend's wedding, or for a church, or for the BSO...... You don't have to be the best in the world, you just have to be a certain level for certain venues.
I agree with what you said earlier, lewelma--kids should enjoy what they're doing. But trying to be the best in the country is a tough job with someone always trying to take your place..... So it's a-ok not to do it competitively.
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On 4/6/2018 at 1:59 PM, whangty said:
But, I see nothing wrong in setting big goals and doing one's best trying to attain them even at a young age...
Absolutely agree! Better to encourage kids to think big and figure out how to get there than to have all their dreams squashed and be afraid to try something because adults tell them "they can't."
One of mine wants to be a youtuber. I can't believe how many adults say "you can't make money doing that!" I just want him doing something other than watching TV all day. If he achieves his dreams, great! If he doesn't, at least he's learning something trying.
PS: I think working on both math and music is a good combination. When he hits a wall in one, he can work on the other. I don't think it has to necessarily be one or the other.
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On 4/6/2018 at 1:54 PM, chocolate-chip chooky said:
Can you all share your thoughts on this?
Do you think it's important for our kids to have friends their own age?
And if so, why?
Yes. On the one hand, I think having a range of friends/ages is a good thing (mine has friends younger and older and adult). But recently I ran into a situation where my son who is 14 was invited over to watch movies with some 16-18 year olds he knows through an non-school activity (where he is the youngest in his group), and they were choosing to watch a rated R movie. We declined, but it was a definite freak-out moment for me. I realized how lucky we are that most of his friends are
a) closer to his age
b) primarily want to play board games when they're together
c) have parents who I feel comfortable will keep the situation age-appropriate.
I think that he has a healthy social life, so declining was his choice and he didn't mind at all, but I also think that if he didn't have a healthy social life, he might have felt bad about not going.
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I think the choice on early Kindergarten is about the social maturity. If you think your son can socialize just fine, I'd definitely apply and see what the private schools think. You may still have to homeschool eventually because he'll learn at a faster pace, but at least you stand a chance of having him enjoy a year or two or even just making it work longterm. If you wait another year to go to K, most likely he'll be bored from the start. If they don't think he's ready, then you simply wait.
Also, I would recommend not doing extra academic work with him at night unless he specifically asks to try to slow things down. If he's gifted, in 2-3 years, he'll be top of the class anyways. You can always focus on other things--art, robotics, music, informational shows, but if you do reading and math with him, he's more likely to be bored in school.
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She says she's been doing this for 7 years. Even told me about another intelligent person who was surprised about how bad she did in the nonverbal part.
Makes me feel sorry for other people she has tested.
So far I have not received the report she promised to send. I was planning to wait and then call to complain if she didn't send the handwritten notes or to complain that the notes prove she screwed up. Right now I'm so busy I don't know what to do. This will probably have to wait until January to get resolved (if it ever does).
You can be doing something wrong for 7 years and not realize it. :(
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I am concerned about the admissions criteria. Her grades and test scores are OK but not fabulous, and do not reflect the kind of things she gravitates to on her own. (For example, in 9th grade biology she did a lot of reading on her own about prion diseases, and last year her Latin teacher commented on how she was always asking questions beyond the scope of the class. Right now, she's reading the Aeneid. Last year, she taught herself a lot of Japanese.) I think it's basically because she's not currently engaged, so she does the bare minimum. She was accepted into a local gifted program for summer and weekend enrichment when she was in elementary school. Would there be any benefit in having her take an IQ test? We've never done that because of the cost.
What about taking the SAT? I don't know when that stops being useful as an IQ test, but it's certainly cheaper.
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Gifted kids aren't all alike. And frankly, some test better than others.
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I thought it was 1 in 1000.
"The criteria for individually administered tests typically represent scores in the 99.9th percentile. "
http://www.davidsongifted.org/Young-Scholars/How-to-Apply/Qualification-Criteria
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Love the comments on the article. So many kids get excited about school when they're actually challenged.
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Oh fount of knowledge...... Paper or Online for the ISEE?
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adding: your son is so advanced in science and math that the classes he can take are not so likely to make a difference in his happiness as the friends he might be able to make, so I'd tend to decide a school for social reasons and broadening him in areas other than academics, rather than the best academic school in city, where even that probably will be below his level in the STEM area. Being closer to home might also be a plus over having to travel to the main school.
To be honest, sounds like your son will only be on campus half the time. His social life may be split between SCU and school. That complicates things a lot.
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I believe DE at a CC is free in CA for anyone under 18. So price isn't an issue, transportation is.
Woodside HS does have the best math curriculum I've seen yet for a "normal" private or public high school--all the courses offered at Canada (a CC) are offered on campus. M-A seems to have a better cohort, but doesn't have the classes. (Obviously places like Nueva, Proof School, BU Academy, etc. will have a better curriculum simply because they're designed to meet the needs of gifted and/or accelerated students, and not the normal cohort so I wouldn't consider them "normal" schools.)
Arcadia, maybe you should move up here. :)
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I guess here's another question, but for many people on this list, their kid took SATs in 7th grade for talent search or just yearly testing. Is there a concern with sending a kid to a school if they scored better as a 7th grader than the school's median or average? Is that just irrelevant because it's all about whatever that top cohort is doing, or is that a real concern for fitting in?
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Hi, Terri: No, we're not considering attending. But I do know some smart kids who attend. I'm just generally curious about the school since it's nearby; I don't need information imminently.
My general sense of the school is that it's big enough that if you have gifted kids, they can find their tribe and the tougher classes. They also have a really good robotics team. Frankly, it reminds me of my own big public high school that attracts students from all walks of life.
This is what I'm worried about. I have to be honest, but from the list of where the valedictorians went to college, I left really wondering if my son's tribe is there or how many there are in it.
And he's not a robotics person :(
I think the school's focus is probably not on these kids, honestly. They certainly have classes for them, and I'm impressed by their offerings. But they're not trying to be Paly or compete with M-A. They're trying to inspire kids whose family has no history of college graduates at all, to consider and strive for a 4 year college and trying to prepare them to succeed at college It's absolutely a noble goal, and I know the community needs it, but I'm kinda left wondering if the gifted kids will be left to their own because "they're doing fine."
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Is this Woodside HS of which you speak? We may be neighbors. I'll be really interested to hear how a year there goes.
Two questions:
1. Are you thinking of sending your 14yo there?
2. Do you know any gifted/High achieving kids who go there?
If yes to 1, I'll PM you with my observations after the tour
If yes to 2, could you PM me with how they're doing and what their thoughts are regarding the school?
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One thing to keep in mind is that if you're homeschooling, you can always go back and review something if you discover he's missing a skill.
The other thing to keep in mind is that speed is in the mind of the beholder. If you're used to what kids are doing under common core, you think it's fast, but if you were hanging around a certain set of kids, you might think it was actually slow.
At this point, I've gotten used to the idea of kids doing Calculus BC in 5th-9th grade. It's all perspective.....
What is this strength and how do I tap into it?
in Accelerated Learner Board
Posted
Great question. I think there have to be careers where you think 10 steps ahead. Lawyer maybe? Entrepreneur/business owner?