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importswim

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Posts posted by importswim

  1. 2 hours ago, KungFuPanda said:

    About that avocado window. For the first time ever I purchased two avocados that do not seem to be ripening. Is this even a thing? I’ve never had this problem ever. It’s been over a week and they’re still rocks. 

    Do you have a brown paper bag and an apple (or banana?) You can put the avocadoes in the bag with one of them and they'll ripen faster. After they're ripe put them in your fridge and they should be good for a week (at least that's what works for me).

    I am closely following this topic whilst trying to maintain the balance of keeping a back-stock of food but not hoarding and not wasting anything. It's a lot to think about.

    • Like 2
  2. 36 minutes ago, Familia said:

    This all sounds awesome. With my unfamiliarity of FL, though, only through ‘what you hear’, aren’t there alligators in the water?? Shivers! But, I love to kayak.

    I live in the area. Haven't seen an alligator in the rivers/bay/sound/ocean at all since 2014 (when I moved here). Sharks, however... LOL! You'll be fine. 

    Do you like traffic? Destin is crazy in the summer so just be prepared for a busy time.

    If you want quaint then you'll want to drive down 30A. It's East of Destin but a close drive: Seaside, Alys Beach, Rosemary Beach...etc... each town has a different feel. Seaside is where they filmed The Truman Show and they have food trucks and bathrooms and a neat independent bookstore to browse through. The whole area is a a little hoity toity but it's still super fun to walk around.

    You said you're not beach people but you'll probably want to walk on it at some point. If you're in Destin I wouldn't drive to Navarre just for the beach (even though I'm biased and it's my favorite) because getting back through FWB and then through Destin traffic makes you want to gouge your eyes out with a dull plastic ice cream spoon for entertainment... If you're in FWB and west of their "downtown" area then Navarre would be an easy drive.

    ETA: Just read you wanted to stay close to Okaloosa. If you're on Okaloosa island then you're close to the beach and I'd just walk along that one. All of the beach will be the same experience. 🙂 

    • Thanks 1
  3. I'm so so so sorry that you're going through this. I also need to lose about 75 pounds. I started IF in January and have lost 20 and have found it helpful for my sugars (though I'm not currently diabetic I was pre-diabetic). Can you try to do without the bone broth in the morning? It might help because it won't affect your digestion or insulin release. If you do want the bone broth for gut health and healing can you drink it in your window?

    That's all I've got and has been the only thing that has worked for me in 10+ years of different "diets" and ways of living. I've tried everything. I do believe though that different things work for different people. I need to do clean fasting (only black coffee and water) IF to see any results at all. 

    Reading your OP made me empathize with you. Nutrition and health are so hard and it seems like everyone has their "you should do this and you'll be fine!" It's very frustrating when you're trying hard and cutting things out and not seeing results or feeling better. Sending lots of hugs.

    ETA: To answer your actual question: I read Feast Fast Repeat by Gin Stephens and got on a FB page related to it that's been VERY helpful to me. There are a ton of FB pages out there for whichever route you go. Is that an option?

    • Thanks 1
  4. 12 hours ago, KSera said:

    While I haven’t done it myself due to the above mentioned issues with hunger, I do know due to history with other family members that there are also risks to certain people, and very particularly anyone with a susceptibility to an eating disorder. My family member who struggles with that started with IF and still cannot get back to the regular eating pattern they need to maintain weight. Just a thing for people to be aware of.

    Yes! If people have had any issues with disordered eating in the past it can definitely be a trigger and is something to watch out for. 

    • Like 3
  5. 2 hours ago, KSera said:

    Do you not get super hungry with that? I have no experience with losing weight, but have hit the phase of life where I can see I’m going to need to start being more mindful or I will continue to gain and I’m nearing the upper limit of a healthy range for me. I can’t do the no eating after a certain time thing though as I get so hungry, and I can’t fall asleep hungry, nor do I really believe in making myself be hungry as a practice. In general, I’ve always needed to eat small, frequent meals or I get super cranky. Do people like that still cut off food after a certain time and just be hungry or do those of you who do that not feel hungry at night?

    Not the PP you quoted but I started IF in January and have lost 20 pounds (I have a "lot" to lose and it's going slowly but it's staying off)

    I thought I would get hungry but I haven't and IF has done numbers on my sweet/salty/snacky tooth. I can easily look at something and pass it over as something I don't need to or want to eat. It's unexplainable to me because I've always been a snacky person and never was able to say no if I decided I wanted it. I used to feel hungry very often but with keeping to a clean fast IF (only black coffee and water in my fasting window) it's been super helpful and has radically changed my health. I've gotten my energy back and I'm shocked at how easy it is. I haven't been exercising either, but I would like to add that in at some point. I eat in a 6 hour period each day and shift my window around based on what I have going on that day. Some days that means I fast longer between meals and some days I fast shorter but it all works itself out in the wash and helps me to keep things easy. It's sustainable for me and that's what I need.

    • Like 3
  6. I take my chacos, vibram 5 fingers, and a pair of comfortable slip on flats with me whenever I travel and that usually covers most bases. Chacos will probably be too much arch support for you, though. I wear the comfortable slip on flats at the airport to go through security.

    We travel standby when we fly and so, like you, have to pack pretty lightly.

    ETA: The vibrams are often a talking point that break the ice with people while traveling. People find them very funny looking. LOL! I 

    • Like 1
    • Thanks 1
  7. On 4/14/2022 at 7:42 PM, Baseballandhockey said:

    I make what my kids call “fake Cava”.

    Brown rice and black lentils 

    Red pepper hummus

    Feta

    Roasted sweet potatoes and Brussels sprouts and whatever

    Pickled onions

    Cucumber tomato salad 

    Some kinda left over spicy meat 

    My DH loves Cava! Thanks for typing this out.

     

    I usually just look on menus online to figure out combinations to make at home. DH likes some of the Sweetgreen bowls as well so I've gone on there for some ideas. 

  8. On 4/13/2022 at 5:48 PM, KSera said:

    I just tried and could not for the life of me get it, even though you get unlimited guesses. I got to the right part of the right continent by my third guess (so, deep red) and then went all around there and have a map that is deep red right up to the coast and then progressively lighter concentrically around there. But there are no countries in the dark red area left to click on. I am so puzzled. Is there any way to see the answer?

    Was that the Sao Tome and Principe day? My DD did get that one but probably because she did Africa relatively recently. I haven't done it in a couple of days, though!

    Do you guys see a map on worldle? It just shows me the country shape...🤔

    • Thanks 1
  9. My DD has been doing geography this year and has spent a lot of time outlining maps. I wasn't sure if it was helpful but after playing worldle for a month or so and watching her get the country on the first guess almost every time I'm seeing the value in it. LOL! She and her dad compete to see who can guess correctly the fastest. She almost always wins (and he's VERY good at geography).

    Another game that we like playing is Globle. There's a mystery country every day and you have to guess it. It will give you how close the border of your guess is to the mystery country and is really fun.

    • Like 1
    • Haha 1
  10. 16 hours ago, HS Mom in NC said:

    I wouldn't call your suggestions supporting her seeing all sides. I would call it bombarding her with your side and turning it into an academic assignment.  It's off putting and not the approach Jesus or His disciples used.

    Also, as a Christian myself, I wouldn't suggest an apologetics approach. We have enough people in church buildings who are there because of someone else's arguments instead of being there because of personal experience with The Spirit drawing them to Himself and indwelling them.

    Ultimately, people don't come to Christ because of arguments, they come because they experienced the love and grace of God, usually demonstrated by sacrificial love shown by one of Jesus' followers..  Right now the evangelical world (my world) has largely failed to understand it and now they're scratching their heads wondering why people good at arguments like Zacharias and MacArthur haven't been transformed into christlikeness.  Well, folks, it's because that's not how that works.

    Please, please, please don't part of that mess-your daughter deserves so much better than that. Churches are losing so many young people who were raised in that apologetics argumentation culture.  Just love her and others like Jesus does in humbleness. Do justice, love mercy.  Serve the least of these.

    HS Mom in NC, I just want to say that you're a treasure on this board! I often read a topic/thread and start forming a response only to find that you've eloquently put my thoughts into words already. I really appreciate your ability to do so and thought I'd tell you. 

    OP: All of my advice is going to be for YOU and not for your daughter (though I think if you start with yourself first it may help with her!)

    I would start with reading the Bible yourself with emphasis on God's whole plan, who He is, and who we are in Him. Pray that the Holy Spirit would help you rightly divide truth. That may naturally help you to answer some of the questions that your daughter has at to what you believe. From there I'd look at trusted commentaries if you're having trouble with what the verses intended.

    After that I'd read some of the books that PP's suggested, including the ones from Atheists (and even the ones that have a harsh tone that some are saying). Go through with your husband (or by yourself) and ask yourself those hard questions and come to a stance on an answer. Know why you believe what you believe. Pray for wisdom, use scripture as the source text for answers. Try not to take things out of the context of what it tells us about God, how to walk with Him, and how to walk with others. We should not be afraid of asking questions or reading harsh opposition. It should cement what you believe and give you a ready response to give a reason for the hope that you have.

    You said that your daughter is smart. She'll want to know what you believe and why. You can present your answers as "some people believe xyz, your dad and I believe that abc and here's why". Those conversations will do a lot more to foster her understanding and will help knit you together as a family even if she ends up not believing the same as you.

    TLDR: Don't give your daughter books. Research for yourself. Define what you believe. Have open and heartfelt conversations. Enjoy relationship with her. Pray for The Lord to draw her to Himself and open her eyes to truth. Love her well if it doesn't happen.

    • Like 4
  11. On 4/3/2022 at 8:30 PM, Emba said:

    In an ideal world, maybe, but I’ve been to a couple and that was not my experience.

    Yes, I almost edited right after I pushed submit to say a "good" licensed therapist. I assumed that was implied but I probably should have done it! I think it's like medication, unfortunately, sometimes trial and error to find the right fit.

    • Like 1
  12. 5 hours ago, Scarlett said:

    Y’all are my therapist. 🙂

    Rut roh. I should add therapist to my economist and immunologist jobs right now😂 but sadly I have no experience or degree in any of those. 

    If you can find a way to see a licensed therapist I'd still recommend it since as you can see the advice here, whilst often well meaning,  can get convoluted and is hard to dispense when we don't know the exact situation. A licensed therapist can give solid advice without any bias, projection, or lens.

    • Haha 1
  13. 4 minutes ago, HomeAgain said:

    This is an interesting phrasing that comes up over and over, but I have to assure you that you should not dread parenting an adult.  The fact is, we DON'T parent adults.  That part of your life will be done.

    We mentor.

    We offer suggestions.

    We set personal boundaries of what we will allow ourselves to be a part of.

    We offer a safe space to be themselves with us, within boundaries of safe and legal behavior.

    We offer a shoulder to cry on and a hug when needed.

    We offer support as they struggle through learning independence and adulting skills.

     

    We. do. not. parent. them. It is insulting to the adults we raised and the young adults we were ourselves in the past.  I am at a loss to comprehend why this phrasing has come up so much.

    I do understand what you meant and can see that the phraseology is an irritant for you. I'll have to think in future as to whether I want to use it in case it will be that for other people. I will always be a parent so don't have a visceral reaction to the word "parenting". In my eyes I can still use the word parent but have it mean what you've listed.

    I plan to do all of the things that you stated and I'm not planning on having the same type of relationship that I had with them when they were children. I'm sorry that they way I stated it was so offensive to you! ❤️

     

    • Like 8
  14. 3 hours ago, Scarlett said:

    This behavior started in November and I knew he was lying.  Until then I did not believe he was lying about anything.  I very quickly proved to myself he was lying and Dh confronted him and he admitted he had lied.  But he said he did not want to continue 1) lying and 2) the behavior that was causing him to lie.  And I believe he is conflicted.  And I also believe he continues to lie.  Probably mostly to himself.  
     

    I get a little nuts when I feel like someone I am close to is lying to me.  Probably a little hyper awareness and fallout from my 26 years with lying xh.  Then I begin to doubt every word out of their mouth.  So then I find myself proving to myself he is lying in semi stalker ish ways so I can’t really call him out on it every time. 
     

    It really has me torn up and I hate that I am nagging Dh about it to the point our relationship suffers.  It is the one strong thing I have and I do not want to mess it up.  

    Have you thought about seeing a counselor? I don't mean that in the "you're so messed up you need to see a counselor" vibe, but in the I think it may be helpful to have someone to talk to and run by your thoughts with vein. Unfortunately you can't make your dss change and can only deal with your responses. I just thought it might be some good advice because I'm reading that your relationship with your DH is suffering and you have trauma in your past that is informing your present reactions (understandably!!!) Talking it through with someone may be help in that they can give you advice in how to respond or some tools in your toolbelt in how to walk through this.

    Hugs to you! My oldest kiddo is 17 and I'm partly dreading parenting an adult. Reading these threads helps me think through how to react in the future.

    • Like 7
  15. Well since the only "proper" blue is big Kentucky blue......

    I'm not any of the options. I do care and I do know what you're talking about but I'm not rooting for either team. I will, however, be watching! I have good friends who are Carolina fans but they're really snarky and nasty about it during bball season so I'm half hoping Duke win because of that. I'm torn though, as I feel like that's not very nice of me. LOL!

    You need to google The Holderness Family's latest video as Penn is a UNC fan and he does a parody about this game to Hamilton music. So funny.

    • Like 5
  16. On 3/18/2022 at 8:55 PM, KungFuPanda said:

    Who else is old enough to remember gathering glass soda bottles and returning them for a deposit and reuse? I'm envisioning the system working the same way with reusable cups.

     

    I realize the conversation has moved on a bit, but I just got here, 😁

    They do this in Oregon, or at least I did when we lived there. You pay a surcharge on the bottles at the grocery store and when you return them to the machine outside you get your money back. We used to live rurally and had to take our own recycling to the recycle center back then also. It was actually quite a fun activity when the kids were younger.

  17. We use the cups for lots of things like eating a small portion of ice cream, eating fruit or veggies, or even drinking coffee or tea out of them 🤣. I like to use the saucers on our counter by the fridge. We each put our water cup for the day on our color saucer (each family member has a color that is their color so it makes it easy to see who is leaving things around the house). 

    • Like 1
  18. 33 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

     She informed me yesterday that they absolutely do  NOT want me to leave……that they had envisioned her being able to take over the books and take some off of shop manager….they did not plan to have to fill my position with wife.  So she said to please consider at least part time and shop manager chimed in and said or ‘maybe filling in when/if you aren’t here.’  
     

     

    I would be cautious that they would honor just keeping it as a fill in position. My concern is that it would be much more of a full time thing over time. If that's what you want then that's great, but if not I'd decide now on boundaries.

    • Like 1
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