:iagree: And, would add, that just understanding the differences in PEOPLE in general is huge. It's not just cultural but some ppl were raised different and have different perspectives on child rearing. Unless it's harmful, I try to be understanding to the fact that they are just different.

I have the very same situation here. My third son's best buddy is right across the street and is an only child. They NEVER play inside and ALWAYS play over here in MY house. At first, it REALLY did bother me. But, as time has passed I learned a couple of things about their family. 1. Some ppl just really can't handle 'more'. Period. She is of that nature. As I got to know her, she is extremely uptight and always, always doing more than she should and making everything a big deal. So, as I take that into acct, I realize that she probably over thinks everything and it's just simply too much for her. 2. I started going over to her house and popping in for various reasons- returning play things, etc. I noticed that she is somewhat of a 'hoarder'. :confused: I think she would be embarrassed if the kids saw her house. I'm not sure. So, anyway, at the end of the day, I just decided that I would show her that I am completely relaxed and it's not a big deal. She has really lightened up a bunch and they do play at his house more now. I have found that even offer to have him go with us to the pool and things b/c my son values the relationship. It's hard, but I've found that everyone is really different. A perfect match doesn't exist. So, we just take the good and bad. I hope you can do the same. maybe you can try to get to know the mom a little and see what's going on over there. Personally, I have to know someone very well before my kids play at their home. period. You might be shocked at what you find out about her. I don't know. But, really, I have found more than not, that some ppl just can't handle more than what they have. :grouphug:

I think SMIL is the only one being a problem, but I think she really does mean well. She just wanted to see the kids more. That's obvious. :001_smile: At this point, I would do what the kids want. If they want to finish VBS, I would allow them too. I would try to end on a good note, but I wouldn't bend over backwards doing anything that I didn't want to do. Try to be positive, they love you so much that they want you all to themselves! :D

anarchy! :D

It's automatic. :) IT doesn't bother me so I haven't changed it. I notice on FB now that other phones/tablets are doing it, ie Samsung.

Lemon juice and baking soda. Let it soak and you might have to do it several times. I also have good luck with dishwashing detergent that is highly concentrated soaking with warm water. That just about takes anything and everything off.

My only advice is to not read on the internet anymore! :grouphug: It will only make you more anxious. Put your worries to rest. You can do this!!!!!:001_smile:

People run around more these days....especially homeschoolers. I would just try to arrange something when you can. I wouldn't take it personally at all. PPl are just like this. :grouphug:

We had the same thing in our home this month too. It was soooo hard. I allowed my son to attend his first ever youth camp. I felt just like you. I cried, and cried. I worried. But mostly, I walked around and wondered what I would do when he left for college?:confused: When he came home, he was more mature and just different. It was all good things....just a little awakening for me. I'm seeing a young man now. :001_smile: I find the new phases are really hard to adjust to. However, like your daughter, he came home thrilled with the experience and for him, it was life changing. God is good. He will give us strength when the time comes to let them leave the nest!!!!!

Not good. He feels resentful. So, I do not volunteer him for anything anymore. If it's really important, I will discuss it with him before volunteering him. In other words, I seek his permission and then pass it on.

lol...too funny!!!:lol::lol:

My bf's dd has this and said it was related to a condition related to the blood vessels. Her dh has it too. I think she said there is a procedure you can have to lessen the condition.

Heaven by Randy Alcorn, but it's not for children. However, you might read some of it and find scripture to read to her/with her. :grouphug:

Hahaha!:lol: Yes, I'm glad I can be the ONLY one! :001_smile: I only thought calling would be a good idea b/c from your description, she just seemed like such a warm,sincere person. She also seemed to be very comfortable reaching out and being personable. I guess what I'm saying is she didn't seem like the kind of person that would be taken back by a phone call.:001_smile: But, truthfully, I just think it's amazing that you thought of her and you are going to contact her. I'm sure it will make her day! I think she will be thrilled to know that she helped you. ;)

Personally, I would call! :grouphug: I know you would rather write her a letter, but I think a phone call would be wonderful. I can't imagine that she is holding ill feelings toward you. When you suffer loss, I think all bets are off. You were going through something that was terribly painful. I bet she would be delighted to hear from you and realize that she meant so much to you! What a blessing!! The reason I vote for a phone call is b/c it will be genuine, authentic, and your emotions will be expressed most sincerely. You won't try to word every. single. thing. perfectly. You will express your complete thankfulness for her support and you will be able to apologize for your lack of gratitude during the hardest time in your life. I just believe that she would love to hear your voice as you express to her how much she meant to you. :001_smile:

Wow! I can only say, "WOW!" I guess you really find out who your 'friends' are when life gets tough. I just can't believe that neither mother's in this situation have the mental capacity to give you emotional support. You are going through some pretty hard times and they can't seem to see anything but themselves. I'm really sorry. I know how it feels to not have support. I really wish there was something magical I could say. Do not blame yourself. Take it one day at a time and rid your life of ppl that can't be supportive of you. I don't think that is too much to ask. :grouphug:

That's crazy! Ack! I have four boys and would not want to deal with that. I think that would make a great conversation for what NOT to look for in a future girlfriend/wife! lol!:lol: And, for what it's worth, I know several young girls that have FB accts that are that age. I have no idea why their mother's think it is ok, but they do. My son's that are younger asked me for one, and I told them no. YOu have to be 13. They said........ has a FB acct, why can't I? It makes me frustrated b/c I have to explain to my kids that the other children are doing something that is wrong. It doesn't send a good parenting message to my kids about the other parents. :confused:

It sounds like they genuinly want you to come, but they don't understand your reasoning for not coming.I would not like the manipulation part at all. However, if they dont' understand why you are saying no, it might just be their way of getting a more direct answer. Specifically, your MIL calling her son and finally your dh telling her it was b/c of money. If you had been honest from the beginning, they would know you just couldn't afford it and make other plans....that didn't involve you cooking for everyone.:glare: I would just talk with dh about how you wish to handle the expensive family gatherings and let everyone know. That should take care of the problem.

I think your 30's are really about self discovery. They were for me. I am at the end of my 30's now. For me, it was about deciding who I was, what I was going to do with my children and my life. You make some very critical decisions during those years. It's hard for women b/c we have so many other ppl to consider while we make those decisions. I agree with everyone else that you have a plate full. I am wondering if you just feel like you 'should' be getting a degree.? I know I always felt guilty for neglecting my own education and career. However, by the time I hit my mid 30's, I decided what I wanted and it din't involve going back to school. Maybe one day, but this is not the season for me. I wonder if you are putting pressure on yourself b/c you feel like you need to do it? It does get better. :) Hang in there and be gentle with yourself.:grouphug:

I think you are just emotional which is certainly normal under the circumstances. I would be sad too, but I would be very happy for the joy my child was having. It's hard letting go...even with the little things. My son went to summer camp this summer for the first time ever. He is fourteen! I was a wreck! :-/ He came back with a whole host of new experiences that I didn't have with him or even see! It was really weird...but, he was so happy. So, that made me happy! :grouphug::grouphug:

I wouldn't buy or send anything. I think the whole thing is silly. Why bother sending postcards telling someone they aren't invited and then, ask for gifts? Mmmmm...don't think so!

For my wedding, we ordered from our local Harris Teeter. The quality was amazing and the prices were even better. I paid for all of my flowers what the cost of just my bouquet would have been. There is always a gamble with this type of thing, but for your situation, I wouldn't hesitate. :) I did the same thing...had a floral arrangement made for a funeral. It was beautiful too. So, I have always had great experience with them.

Yes! The best thing to do is not allow it to control you. However, if it continues with desensitization techniques, you might need to see someone. It sounds like you are doing well. Mine spiraled quickly and created a host of problems. I wish I had done things so differently. Good news...it is very treatable. Meds are great and you will not need them forever....if at al. :001_smile:

Well, I will try. I had my first panic attack at 32. I was at the fair with my kids. My symptoms where: heart palpitations that wouldn't stop, feeling like i was about to die, shaky, and severe anxiety...I had to leave the scene right then and there. My palpitations and anxiety to continued to spiral until I was just about house bound. I finally went to a psychiatrist only b/c I couldn't function anymore. I have since figured out that my attacks turn into anxiety disorder- i.e. not being able to leave my home and shutting down. My anxiety didn't go away after the attack stopped. I would be anxious waiting for it to happen again. Therefore, I was stuck in a vicious cycle. Your situation does sound a little like an attack. However, it doesn't necessarily mean anything horrible. How are you feeling now that it is over? Are you feeling ok? If you have regained your composure, I would make a mental note of what your triggers are. It sounds to me like you might also have a little OCD. Do you like things to be really clean? The fact that mouse droppings bother you isn't unusual. The fact that you can't stop thinking about them and the germs and the problems they can cause, might be an indication that you are obsessing over it. If you are obsessing, this will only increase your anxiety and create more problems. I would just be mindful of your feelings. Pay attention to your triggers. Set out numerous mouse traps for your husband. Instruct him to disregard them in a way you can't see them. :) Grab your favorite cleaner and wipe everything down. You will feel better soon. I think this has a lot to do with control. YOu have no control over where those things have been or where they are going. It's gross. I get it. Just remember not to let it get too out of control with your thoughts. HTH

Yes, you can both watch separately. Second question.... I don't think so. .