So how hard is diagramming for a child who is accelerated/gifted in language? I was going to wait to do FLL until dd was 5.5 this fall, but after teaching her about prefixes and seeing how interested she was, I asked her if she wanted to learn more grammar. She's really excited about nouns now. :laugh: Anyway, looking through the series, going at a modest pace, she would start FLL4 at 7.5. It just looks a lot harder... but my kid is still really young, so I can't really imagine that stage anyway. LOL I'm sure I will find a different curriculum to use before then, because that's how it goes when you plan too far ahead... but it gives me something to think about when I should be in bed. ;) I wanted to do MCT when she turned 8.5/started 3rd grade. If FLL isn't finished, it won't matter, I just hate the idea of starting a subject, then dropping it for a year or whatever because the next level is too hard. I'm not very good at coming up with my own stuff!

Inuit.

No experience, but I have read that being on all fours as much as possible NOW can help the baby turn. Their backs are the heavy side, so gravity could helpin that position.

Just curious, thinking ahead needlessly again! :hurray:

Tablet won't let me quote, but yes, the situation is entirely too nuanced for a message board. LOL Thank you for your advice. That actually is what I was looking for. I feel better prepared, and am happy to put this aside for another week. :)

Yes, I'm sure.I've known her her whole life. She wasn't just quiet or distant. She was abrupt, blatantly ignored me when I spoke to her, etc. I've seen her upset about outside things before, and this wasn't it.

My tablet won't let me edit. But yes, I have actually taught her how to behave at my house. She usually does very well, which is why I was thrown for a loop. And there was no forcing of anything. I'm not sure how that could have been read into my OP. ;)

These are all things that have taken me years to learn, and am still coming to terms with! It is difficult to let go of hope, difficult to never know if I could make more of an impact if I just do a little more.I will say that having high expectations of her over the years seems to have helped her be her better self with me. I don't at all doubt that that was the right thing all those years.

There is only one other time she acted this way with me. She stayed distant for the next two months. I would have assumed she would have been over it a week later. I'm not trying to worry about it, I'm trying to have a plan. You are saying I shouldn't put up with it, but there is no way to make her do anything, obviously. I tried letting it go, and she ignored me no matter how cheerful I was, a full week later, during which there was no mention of any of this. So I am asking, if I don't say anything about any of this in the hopes that she will be over it, and she's NOT, and is already at my house for her ride, I don't understand what I am supposed to do.

So do I send her a heads up on FB. Do I wait until next week, at which point she is at my house already? The caregivers will think I am completely overreacting if I say she can't go at all.

If she says she is a 32, then that means she really is bigger, in her mind. And like I said, the caregivers go along with it. When I questioned it, they insisted it was true, and said she has been growing, and is now almost 80 lbs. :confused1:

Because I do have a tendancy to be intense, and being a pitbull about things isn't very effective. There is also a side of me with a "just do it because I said so." Surprisingly, when I was much more involved in her life, I was fairly strict with her, or at least very, very consistent. I have always been the only one she would listen to or show respect for. I just don't want her to feel like she has to earn my love. She really doesn't come from a good situation, so I'm more aware of how SHE will perceive things. Then, she will quietly feel rejected and unloved, just like so many others have made her feel. :( Everyone here said it wasn't a big deal, and to let it go, so I guess I'm paranoid, even though this is a separate issue. Yes, I am that stupid. I just really don't know teens, and don't know when to ignore them or when to say something. :glare:

Thank you. You are right, this whole thing is pretty silly on her part. If I can ever get to the point where I no longer care what people think of me, and am no longer paranoid of doing the wrong thing... wow, I won't even know what to do with all the extra time and energy I have!! :drool: I'm fine with no shopping. The problem is that I drive her to and from dance class every week. Do I lightly say that I see she's still upset, and that's not how you treat family, so dh will drive her until she's moved on *smile*? Is that too much? I don't want to escalate this further, or give her more power than she should have over such a simple thing. Assume she is very immature, and is NOT being taught how to be appropriate at home, and probably doesn't actually know how to deal with these feelings.

I've let it go as something she doesn't want at this time. :) My dilemma was partly over if I should be expected to buy something that clearly doesn't fit. She doesn't want one that fits. She doesn't want a shelf bra. She wants a 32 whether it fits or not. If that weren't a factor,there would have been no conflict in the first place. LOL Her caretakers don't see a problem in saying she needs a 32 because she wants one. They asked me to get her more, to help out. I wasn't willing to spend money on something that clearly, clearly doesn't fit. I was too naive in thinking it wouldn't be a big deal. I was wrong. :lol: She gave me the cold shoulder the entire night last night. I wouldn't be surprised if this lasted weeks with her. I did decide to apologize for embarrassing her though, when being upbeat and trying to move on didn't work. Teens are not my area of expertise. :blink:

The world? Maybe. Your child? That's a separate consideration.

Not to keep this going, but she wears size 8 girls clothing on top and bottom. She wanted to buy a 32, and that is what she got in the one other bra she owns because she "outgrew the others."

I do feel the need to point out that I asked for help BECAUSE I know I struggle with this. :) There isn't really a way to grow emotional intelligence if I don't deal with these issues and learn from them, is there? And if I back away, that's it. There is no one else. So I am doing the best I can, and trying to learn when I mess up, which happens all the time because I am human. Like I said, there is so much back story in all of this. I analyze things as well, but there is no way to do that accurately based on this thread.

I agree.:( her caretaker goes along with it though, and thinks doing things so you won't be embarrassed around your friends is perfectly acceptable. I'm not just fighting the tide; I'm fighting the entire ocean. I am trying to learn to let go of as much as possible....

She is very petite in every way, and is embarrassed. She is insisting on a size because in her family, lying to others and yourself makes something true. :( I had thought about taking her to get measured, but assumed that would be worse. I will remember youradvice for dd some day!

Crap, now everyone thinks I'm weird. :bored: You'll just have to take my word for it that I do a LOT of things to fill in the gaps that normal aunts shouldn't have to do. I'm sure you would be asking your sister to get your dd a bra in the first place, you know? For what it's worth, I definitely didn't imagine any state of undress, or any touching of anything other than her back. :bored: It's good to hear that even moms could have had the same response. I will take it much less personally!

:laugh: When she was younger, I was like her mom in a lot of ways. I am a very open person, and am raising my dd to be that way, that's just what works for me. My dn is being raised the exact, exact opposite. LOL I'll throw this in for fun: if YOU had limited funds, would you buy something you know is nowhere near the right size because of pride or embarrassment?

ETA: Thank you so much everyone! This is all so stupid, but I just didn't want to make it worse. Thanks for the perspective. There is a long history here, so you'll have to take what I say at face value. I'll try to be very brief! I have always tried to help my niece have a better life. Sometimes I am too pushy with how I think things should be done, because I am trying to prevent real problems. She is now a preteen, and very immature, but wants to be very independent. I was told she needed new br*s, I wanted to measure her because I know she is lying about her size because she is embarrassed about her lack of a size, and wanted a certain size, not one thatfits. I said I had to measure or I wouldn't get one very nicely. Later, I sent her a message about how I cared about her and therefore would always tell her the truth about things, don't care what friends say, etc. It is now a week later after this event, I haven't talked to her since (this is normal). She is over right now, hates conflict, but is also acting very distant toward me. This is all very stupid, but I'm trying so hard not to be so pushy anymore. Do I say anything to her, or do I act upbeat as though it didn't happen? She could very well act distant all night. I love her like my own, and we were very close when she was younger because I put so much effort into making up for what she didn't get at home (bad situation). She is very uncomfortable with any display of feelings in these situations, even if I'm not acting mad.

I am apparently the fattest person in the entire world, other than my own country. Literally. Wow, do I laugh or cry? :bored:

I'm still reading, and have passed on the main points expressed here. The mother is beside herself, and it breaks my heart, but I am trying not to fix something I don't have the power to fix myself. I've always been scared of having teens who make bad decisions; I realize now that it is my future adult children I should be worried about. Ugh.