So, we had a Major Breach of Trust with technology, and found out last night (yay for 2021, lol, saving 2022 by a hair). Kids will have No Technology for at least 5 months and then we will re-evaluate. Kindles (Paperwhites, not Fires) may be allowed but nothing else. One of the kids wanted to start learning Mandarin as a 2022 goal. Is this possible without internet/technology? I'd imagine a book would be not as effective without being able to hear it. Maybe a DVD set? I may be willing to allow static, non-internet DVDs at a set time. Streaming services are a no. Any ideas welcome except for loosening the tech ban. It's completely necessary and fair given the circumstances. I don't want it to "ruin" 2022 for their other goals but everyone is in agreement this is a just action. If push comes to shove, it's the Mandarin that will lose out, not the tech ban.

2 Goals for 2022: House Ready to Move. Bank Account Ready to Move. January goals: House: Month 1 of 3 for clearing out/donating from kid rooms: bedrooms 1 & 2, homeschool room. (this is half the house) Bank account: get firm grip on spending and full outlook of expenses through September. Try to trim down expenses so that a full half of income can start going to savings by March (to start February or March depending on how first step goes). House, mini goals by week: 1. Clean van and get it ready for donation runs. 1a. Pack up all kid books not being used for school and break up into sell/store/donate. 2. Clear out kid clothes that are too small or will be too small for their next season, for donation. 3. Clear out any bedding that is not being used: summer sheets into one box, heirloom blankets to 1(!) box (ok maybe 2), rest to donate. 4. Donation run last week of January. Bank account, mini goals by week: 1. make 4-week repeating food schedule, with budget numbers with each meal/week; goal is less than $800/mo, preferably $650-700. 2. Pay all current bills, withdraw expected kid $$ for the year. House subscriptions (insurance, ~utilities) add to calendar and total up. 3. Check paycheck withholdings and adjust as necessary. Do a split deposit amount straight to savings?? 4. All business receipts/accounting together and ready for taxes; any business subscriptions put onto calendar based off 2021 receipts. Bonus goal: 300 days of logged workouts. January goal: 25 days.

Thank you! I know I have so many things that need to get done in 2022 (hence my word Focus) but I couldn't think of one that lent itself to this type of goal setting until I saw this! We might need to move in September (and won't know until... September, lol) so my goal can be getting things ready for fast pack & go and determining storage, etc. Then the last 3 months I can have different tracks of goals depending on if we moved or stayed, but be stuff/organization related. So I'm in, too!

On this episode of Claw and Order <dun dun> He needs a better clawyer Speaking of which:

This is us, to a T. Except the part about "many masking". It is a small minority here who will mask. Social distance seems more of "because there's room" but once it there's a reason to get close or people get into a line, it's pre-Covid closeness here. I got the kids vaccinated at Walgreens, with the earliest appointment of the day for one shot. The other I just had to take what was available, which was a weekend 11:00 appointment. Our Walgreens was not set up as HomeAgain's was, but at least it is done. If there is a wait, you can see about requesting they call your phone and you wait outside after check-in until they are ready. For us, the risk during the vaccination process was worth the vaccination protection afterwards. Try getting a mid-week, early morning appointment. I don't think there will be another kid vaccine option for a while, frankly.

Another thought to add: does you son plan to take private music lessons, or does he already? If he does, do you plan to stay with this studio or move to a different teacher? I'd hate for you to move to the public school then 6 months later he's taking lessons from someone who lives in the same block as the private school, or something like that. Conversely, staying with the private then finding a teacher that is in your neighborhood that only has openings at 4-5pm. (Sorry, I don't want to make it more complicated. But this is a big consideration if music is the trajectory he's on. We ended up moving 2 hours away from the studio my daughter studies piano in, and it was worth it to us to find accommodations so that she could continue with that teacher. So speaking from experience is all.)

Having a small memorial in SC (or WA or OR) is fine. The burial can just be... a burial. Have the memorial where it makes sense for those grieving. No, it wouldn't be horrible to have a single headstone for both of them. It makes sense. If they wanted to be buried next to each other, then why can't the headstone reflect they are together? Even if you end up getting separate headstones for them, if they are done a the same time they will match for sure. My grandparents chose "matching headstones" but they were made 8 years apart and just slightly different enough that it's jarring -- it's like they tried to match but then made just enough different choices to look weird together. I wouldn't bring this up to him, if it adds to his distress when he can no longer handle it. If your dad brings it up and won't let go, I would probably agree to a design for her headstone but take a while to actually get it done. If the inscription is obvious what it means with slight revisions, I would just make the revisions because the sentiment he wants is more important than the actual words (and wait until he can no longer see it and be upset). If it's gobbled no matter how you try to parse what he wants inscribed, I'd probably just nix it. Sorry you are going through this. My parents also have plans to be buried where no one really knows them. I'm sorry you have to sort out all of these details when it's so far away and just adds complications to a difficult topic. PS - you can blame the no headstone on Covid delays, for at least another year, if you feel like you need to offer an excuse to anyone who comments on it.

I mean... you cleaned your office, took out the trash and recycling, resolved getting 2 packages sent out via delegation, checked your Slack for important things, took care of the dog's needs, did some laundry (2 loads?!), made lunch, took care of today's mail, and did some online socializing! I get that it's not the productivity you "should" be doing, but give yourself some credit. If I could be unproductive half as productively as you are able to, my house would be much cleaner, lol. Hugs that you're having an unexpected day, but you're still making the best of it. You can do this! *cheerleader pom poms*

😬

This reminds me: on younger kids I actually double make the bed. So: waterproof protector, sheets, then waterproof protector, sheets. If someone has an accident or throws up, just strip the top and the bottom is ready to go no extra work. When washing sheets, they go straight back on the bed, but if someone (cough mom cough) forgets to put the sheets in the dryer or they aren't ready when kid is sleepy, there is no sad staying up or sleeping on the couch: the bed is still ready to go.

30 flour towels in the kitchen, for anything from spill cleanups to dish drying to window wiping to hot-pot holding. (I need to up this to 40-50 I think; since I'm at work all day the flour towel laundry cycle has not kept up with their use). Paper towels are rarely used/needed. Once a week during bathroom cleaning we top off all handsoap dispensers (bathroom and kitchen) from a huge bottle of stuff, so there's never the "there's no more soap" excuses for grubby little hands. Even if a week gets skipped, it's not the end of the world. We don't fold kid clothes. Everyone has one "good" set of clothes that is hung up and reasonably unwrinkly for church/grandparents, everything is is low-wrinkle materials that are just thrown in a basket. Each kid has their own basket, they can fold their own clothes if they want (I help the 4yo since she cares). Water only unless special treat. So everyone has a steel water bottle they use exclusively through the day, it's washed/sanitized end of day, and ready to go again. Everyone has a different pattern so no mixups, and they have lids so no spills. Since mine has broken, it has been such a pain for my own water compared to everyone else. Mason jars for special drinks and liquid measuring cups, so our already-limited shelf space has 2 less things to take on. (6 regular jars, 2 extra large). 1 plate per person in the house. After you're finished eating, wash the plate, put in drying rack, good to go for next meal of day. Is fully put away after dinner dishes (so there's room for the dinner pots on drying rack). Same with bowls. Forks, spoons, knives in glasses in center of table, no table setting required. Cloth napkins too. Commonly used spices (cumin!!!) are bought in bulk, in quantities of 2 or 3 large-for-spices containers, and the last one in the cupboard is marked with a sticky note that way I know it's the last one.

https://www.facebook.com/marketplace/item/942340136677243/?ref=search&referral_code=marketplace_search&referral_story_type=post&tracking=browse_serp%3A3d531c2c-3bb2-41eb-b264-45297d4733e3 Looking at FB Marketplace. This one might be along right track?

Ah! I only selected size to test. Whoops, I'm not an Etsy shopper and it shows, lol.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1064296593/10-off-christel-cinderella-ball-gown?click_key=5a91a7776dcefc140e316a4788b5958043624484%3A1064296593&click_sum=32a872ae&ref=shop_home_active_1&pro=1&frs=1&sts=1&variation0=2182511229 I keep thinking the price is a typo considering the rest of the prices in their shop, but it looks legit? Might be a bit low cut but if you're the sewing type maybe you can fashion something to cover a bit more with some of the skirt? Shipping is probably the nail in the coffin, but you might be able to contact the store to see for a more narrow window than " arrives January 12 - February 26" eta: if you found white dresses that would work, could you dye it?

Anyone got (hopefully not too serious) mishaps happening on your holidays? Here: The kitchen faucet broke! Of course just as I started prepping for company and making the food. Didn't do any dishes last night, so today after unwrapping presents the kids took the dishes outside to rinse them off with the hose while DH got hot water from bathroom to wash in the kitchen sink. Took about 1.5 hours to do the dishes. Thankfully we have disposable plates and cutlery to get through the weekend, lol. Also I forgot the yams in the oven overnight, lol. So tempted to eat them anyway but caution has prevailed so far.

The fact that she hurt you, probably intentionally, and now is projecting that you shared an outdoor Mass with the family to get back at her, it shows she is grasping at straws to justify her jealousy/anger/emotions. She wanted to get a rise out of you and you didn't oblige, so she has to make it seem like you did anyway to continue her narrative. You could have hired Santa himself to surprise all the kids and you would have "ruined Christmas." You could have stayed in bed all day and eaten bon bons and somehow you would have "ruined Christmas." It has nothing to do with what you actually did, or what your intentions are, and this is out of your control. Let it go. I don't read that you did it out of malice. If this is the best you can do for revenge, helping others find safe ways to participate at Mass for Christmas, I think you can indulge in your ruinous activities, lol.

I usually start preheating my oven in the morning and let them sit on the stove close to where the hot air comes out. About half hour in that position and if they weren't fully risen straight out of the fridge, this seems to do the trick.

We had this happen. That super stinks. I understand about being told that you can't bring more food in; in fact, that they won't allow more food in their house. I'd probably be ready to take my family "to the park" and go out to eat, and then bring snacks to store in the car. If you bring food in, just say something about kids are growing, but yeah it probably won't go over great. I hope you aren't there too long. As people get older, sometimes their concept of a serving shrinks. They may see 2 chicken nuggets as overfilling. While it's not reasonable to hold people to that standard, they could have a completely distorted view. If 2 chicken salads plus nuggets would be eaten for a week and maybe still have some go bad, maybe they can't comprehend a "whole week's work of food" being eaten in a day. A funnier story: my parents went to a "party" hosted by my dad's cousin and his wife. There were 20+ people there. Anyway, my parents brought a deli tray as a contribution/hostess gift. The wife took, it, said thank you, and walked it down the hallway and put it in a closed room. When my parents got to the main area of the party, there was one small table with a plate on it. The plate had 14 slices of cucumber on it. It was arranged "nicely" and had obviously not been touched. Next to the plate of cucumber was a stack of snack plates. There was also water from the tap available. My parents saw at least 3 other couples bring food that was promptly whisked away to another room, so on the whole the cousin turned a food profit from the whole thing, lol. Anyway they don't go to parties there anymore.

Okay, so I got the idea to put a fish bowl type thing in the middle of the dinner table so that during dinner/dessert/ randomly we can pull a piece of paper out of the bowl, read the question, and take turns answering. Some of the questions to be thoughtful, "What was your favorite holiday in 2021?" and some funny, "Can you smell ants?" Trying to keep at least 50% holiday-themed. My full list so far: What was your favorite holiday in 2021? Can you smell ants? Who is your favorite movie villain? What is your favorite Christmas movie? What is your favorite Christmas song? [Note; do not allow singing challenge to anyone who says 12 Days of Christmas] What is your favorite Christmas cookie? Which of Santa's reindeer would you want to be? Obviously I need to work on growing this, lol. And I'm sure there's a kit out there somewhere, but this is a last minute idea that I want to put a personal touch on. It's something I'm happy might make the conversation go a bit more smoothly and stay away from questionable areas, or help redirect it when it does. Any other suggestions? Would love to hear any!

@math teacher thank you! And your post reminded me of guacamole too! whew, good call! @Janeway This one from Food Network is pretty close to what I do. I'm not a professional recipe writer so use your cooking judgement on quantities, here's mine below: Chicken Tortilla Soup Ingredients: 1 small onion: diced 4 cloves garlic: minced (I like garlic) 6-8c chicken broth or vegetable broth (depending on size of your pot) 3 tomatoes: diced 1 can black beans 1 can pinto beans 1 can corn (or frozen works too) ~1-1.5 lb chicken: either diced (raw) or shredded, depending on what you start with 2 limes (or 1 lemon): juiced (try this at half first, see how it tastes, then add as you like) 1 bunch cilantro 1 tbl cumin (or more, I just keep adding this, lol) 1 tsp paprika (optional; I ran out and didn't find I missed it) 1 tsp chili powder (optional; I don't usually use it but sometimes the mood strikes) diced green Chile or jalapeños (if you like spicy, I stopped using personally) For toppings: more cilantro, cheese, diced avocado, sour cream, lime/lemon wedges, chips If using raw diced chicken: cook chicken in pot with some oil. Season with salt and pepper. Cook until all sides white. Add onions, garlic, and cook those with the chicken until onion is translucent. (Add cooked shredded chicken here if using that instead. Season with salt, pepper, and some cumin.) Add tomatoes, beans, corn. Add broth until your pot is comfortably full. Simmer for about 10-15 minutes. Around 7-10 minutes of the simmer in step 4: Add cumin to taste, also salt/pepper and any other optional spices/chiles you decide to use. Add lime juice and cilantro to pot (start with half of the lime juice, then add to taste; you may want to start with half cilantro too, depending on your taste). Serve immediately, use toppings how you like. Even though this is "tortilla" soup, I've stopped actually doing the tortilla part and just serve with chips on the side. Some kids dip into their bowl, others eat separately, and I break up the chips and add to my bowl, it's a free for all, lol.

So I have a completely different incident that happened this week that I'll need to revisit. My details aren't important, but I'll be opening up the conversation (after pleasantries about "How was your Christmas?" etc) with, "So I have to apologize bringing this up again, but last week I was a bit caught off guard when you mentioned ~~~. I should have answered more clearly in the moment, but I just wanted to let you know now that..." and then go into what I should have said at the time but was too shocked to say. I really don't know what I would do in your position (return all but the hardest to find one, and include a thank you card for the wonderful gift, maybe??) but maybe some of the introductory fluff will be helpful to you, too.

Thanks Janeway, i did go this way. So final Christmas Eve menu, as of now: Enchiladas (thanks Mom) white menudo (yes, tripe) chicken tortilla soup tacos flautas refried beans Mexican rice Then tamales on Christmas with the leftovers. If you read this list and are gobsmacked I didn't include xyz, please tell me what I'm missing, because I feel like I'm forgetting an obvious something, lol.

Christmas, they are the tradition where I put them in the oven, we unwrap gifts, and then by the time that's over, I can have cinnamon roll with coffee or tea on the couch watching everyone be happy, but past the crazy ripping and excited jumping stage so that the coffee doesn't spill. Confession: I make 2 batches but the kids only know about one......