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acherishedlife

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Posts posted by acherishedlife

  1.  

     

    Just wondering--some of your post, OP, sets off a few warning bells for me. The rigidity, the low frustration level, the literal interpretation--is your little guy on the spectrum, perhaps?

     

     

    We wondered that too.... but we've had him very thoroughly tested. What we have learned is that he's extremely gifted, beyond what we thought possible in our child. All tests have come back that he isn't on the spectrum or nor does he have an LD. But what I've learned is that it is a spectrum and there are levels of certain things in many of us. Clearly he has some in him - not enough to be on anyone's radar in testing but I have learned a lot from reading about autism and aspergers solutions because of my awareness of his tendencies that match up here.

  2. Hi,

     

    I am thinking about setting up a leadership afterschool program for gifted students in my community. I picture a weekly afterschool gathering - 1-2 hours, possibly an outdoor classroom. Monthly guests, hands-on science, and more. I'd like to focus on leadership skills in interaction with teen or adult professionals (possibly mentors), community giving/charitable work, and being a steward of the environment, just to name a few things I think our bright young kids should be exposed to more of.

     

    My son is in Sonoma CA public school, but I want to both provide a social opportunity as well as advanced learning that is appropriate for his level of curiosity. He is going into 4th grade and I am thinking the program could be for 2-5th grades.

     

    Does anyone have experience setting something like this up?

     

    My questions are:

    - Did you work with the school district, school or anyone else? Or just set up on your own?

    - Are there curriculums for something like this out there so I don't have to reinvent the wheel?

    - Do homeschoolers have networks I could/should tap into?

    - Would people pay for this?

    - What have you learned from doing it so far?

     

    Ideas and thoughts are so appreciated! I am trying to decide if I should approach the school district first or just make it on my own and get it up & running then approach them. I prefer the former so they could set the "gifted" criteria and I would be helping them out potentially serve an underserved population. Our district has no gifted/GATE program.

     

  3. (Sidenote, I'd be really interested in titles to those worry books you mentioned!)

     

     

    This series is really good and has a little something for lots of troubled kids (these are picture books to read to your kids/they read themselves)

    http://tinyurl.com/ls5v3oz

     

     

    I can't vouch for this yet but it looked good & was recommended - I have bought it and waiting for the right time to get it out:

    What to Do When You Worry Too Much: A Kid's Guide to Overcoming Anxiety (What to Do Guides for Kids)

    http://tinyurl.com/lpjo27x

     

    This is a great book for parents to read:

    Emotional Intensity in Gifted Students

    http://tinyurl.com/ogcw266

  4.  I think there are benefits in allowing perfectionist children to struggle a bit and find contentment in the less-than-perfect.  

     

     

     

     

    Two of you mentioend this important point and that's where I have landed as well - that there is some  learning going on to learn how to be flexible and accept compromise. These are important life skills. rimk3 - you have so many great recommendations I want you to come to my house and help my son! Well, ok, I will put some of your ideas to work.

     

    I have emphasized the growth vs fixed mindset but some of you mentioned the importance of making mistakes in front of him which I like as well.

     

    What I am realizing is that so many of you have been here before and there is so much value from learning from all of you hardworking parents! My son is the oldest of 3 and perhaps there is more effort needed than I realized with all of this. I am a highly conscientious parent-- but I think I need to be EVEN MORE to help him thru this all! 

  5.  

    What he's learning is to be satisfied with less than his best.

     Oh, you are so right. Then what do I do? I am reading the same message in "Genius Denied" - that our smart kids are being taught to "be average." I really want him to love learning and pursue what he is great at while working on overcoming challenges. But you are so right about this. It scares me deeply. What do I do!?!

  6. Hi!

     

    I find I often have the same opinion of these annoying assignments - what's the point? I think. But then, my daughter who doesn't have the same challenges does just fine with them so I have to be reminded that these assignments work for most other kids.

     

    So -- I tried that exact suggestion with my son - just print out something, trace something, whatever. He said "No, the teacher told us we have to *draw* it ourselves and also that *every* part of the bag must be colored." I run into this frequently - he 1) takes what she says way too literally & 2) wants to do the assignment the way the rest of the kids do. After all, they all present their puppets in class to each other, so he knows and the others do too if he's done something different. And he doesn't want to be different, I think. He wants to feel as capable as they are. Which adds to his pressure I am sure.

     

    I've spoken many times with his teacher and I know shes willing to work with us, I am sure if I spoke with her she would've been fine with the modification to the assignment for him. But sometimes my son doesn't want a modification and sometimes it adds a delay that can create other problems with turning in things, keeping up with schoolwork.

     

    I hear my own narrative and I know what my gut is telling me, that traditional school may not be possible for much longer. At least I know that's what I am thinking. But I would love to hear "success stories" if anyone has experienced something similar and knows a path to help your child get through these issues and stay in traditional school. I have bought him some "worry" books recommended to me - to help with anxiety. We may start working with a psychologist too. But I also know that part of his issues stem from his high intelligence and really hope for help that helps build upon his strengths not just focuses on his faults.

  7. Last night, I dealt with a battle that has become a recurring story in our house. My 3rd grade son, who is highly intelligent, is also a major perfectionist.... its a major problem for him. Expressing himself in any way that is beyond a black and white "correct" answer is extremely painful. That translates to constant difficulty with fictional or opinion-based writing and art. Conversely, he is brilliant with math and logic.

     

    I am trying to figure out how to handle the silly little art assignments that are given to him in his traditional school. Last night is an example. In class, the teacher asked the kids to choose a character in history, create a paper bag puppet and draw the character on it, and prepare an oral biography for the "puppet" to speak in class.

     

    I knew from the start this would likely be a major crisis assignment for my son. He did ok with the research (thankfully), but it was the puppet that brought him to tears. He was literally on the ground in tears, hiding under furniture, etc. multiple times trying to create the perfect face, cut out the clothing just right, etc. etc. He cut out the hair at least 8 times before he was willing to compromise on how it looked enough to let me guide him a bit (and after a break at guitar lessons which thankfully reset him some). Its heartbreaking to watch. He can completely "spin out" over something so simple like this. On top of it, he's very literal - he states "the teacher told me every part of the bag must be colored - even the skin." and he's trying to do the assignment just as he's been told.

     

    When these struggles happen, I ask myself, what is he learning here? Even his little sister was asking "why is this bothering you so much?" and I just know he has his own little internal brain battle going on that none of us understand.

     

    But are these struggles good for him? Indeed he came out overcoming it and indeed compelted the puppet - He had to make compromises of his perfectionist goals of how the puppet should look and dealt with slightly messy lines, coloring etc. which is ultimately the result of the fact he is only 8 (my husband said once - his brain is a Ferrari in a Volkswagen body - so true!). So he did learn something.

     

    But sometimes I just feel like these petty assignments aren't teaching him what is really important. And in turn they are also causing him so much frustration, angst and self-disappointment. They are simple little assignments that work for average kids. But he's basically smarter (according to his IQ) than likely every kid at the school and what he is getting from this is completely different. For him, the struggle isn't memorization of the biographical facts, he's got those down. And he's decent at speaking in front of class. His entire learning is all about getting himself past his own obstacles in his mind to allow himself to create the art.

     

    Is this really the best thing for him to deal with these issues in a traditional classroom teaching environment? I consider it his own learning challenge... but its not labeled a "learning disability" and we don't have a good way to deal with it other than one step at a time. And I just wonder if its fair to put him in these situations.  The teacher understands his challenges. She'd probably be willing to let him skip the puppet. But he wants to be "normal" and do what the other kids do. So he isn't willing to do something different.

     

    Really lost on how to move forward as the petty assignments continue in a traditional classroom environment. I don't want to pull him out of school because he loves his school and I think its good for him socially. But I feel like I am condemning him to torture sometimes with these kinds of assignments and don't know how to help him be happy, challenged & grow amidst his unique challenges & opportunities.

  8. For us, looking at their requirements - they want 2 of 3 items. My son's IQ meets their requirement, but the achievement scores fall short in broad math and only are high enough in brief math -- not sure what that means but it puts us in needing to submit the portfolio as well. I assume they are quite strict with their minimum requirements so just want to do what I can! THanks!

  9. Hi! I am so happy to have found this forum and thread as I am similarly looking for math work for my 3rd grade son.

     

    I'm new to all this - you all know so much about the choices. I taught my son the concept of Algebra back in first grade. I was stunned. But my husband wants to emphasize the importance of a well rounded child and has asked that we don't focus on math, which is easy for my son, but focus on what he needs to do better at (writing). But now my son is finishing up 3rd grade and after newly finding out of his high IQ from testing, I am wondering if part of his problem in school is boredom, and I am re-opening the idea of letting him excel at math at his pace, b/c I want him to feel the joy of success instead of always focusing on the areas he struggles most in.

     

    My question is: I want a math book (not online) that will both teach him the concepts and do quizzes. I checked out Singapore's CWP books but it seems like they are more quizzes than lessons. He doesn't need lengthy lessons, but explaining the concept first (ex: to get the perimeter add the length of all sides) would be helpful. I also don't know if I am looking at the right books so an Amazon link would be much appreciated. I would love to get a book (series_ that just went through the concepts of math from 5th-8th grade. I think he will just absorb it like a sponge and I want him to self-learn as he does very well like that. I am happy to come in and answer questions but he will go thru it much faster if he doesn't have to wait for me to explain each new concept. Thanks!

  10. Hi, it was suggested that I apply to the Davidson Young Scholars program because there are some great resources there.

     

    I tried to explain to my husband last night that we could apply to the program, and realized I really don't know much about it other than I was pointed in that direction b/c of the free resources and I want to take advantage of all the help we can get. Curious more about it for sure!

     

    After looking into it my son does qualify with his test scores but I also need to send in some "work at least 2 grades ahead of his current grade". Does anyone have experience sending in your child's work? My son is in 3rd grade and can do very high level math, but he doesn't complete this at school (why would they give it to him, we are in a normal school). So I printed out some worksheets for him to fill out and thought I could just send those in. Will that work? 

     

     

  11. Thank you for the responses. Sorry, I am new to using these forums and hadn't meant to imply "why everyone was here" I only meant to say you all have so much more experience than me in this area! I appreciate your insight and will go to the Accelerated Board as I already have more questions! Thanks!

  12. Hi, I haven't shared with many but am still replaying the conversation with the school psychologist & team from last week's meeting after testing was completed. They told me my son's IQ is 144.

     

    You all are here b/c your kids are gifted (or you suspect as such I presume)... so maybe you can tell me - should I be freaking out? 

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