No one is saying either is JUST ABOUT. I was asking what defines one as "gay" or "straight" if it is not the sexual attraction. That has nothing to do with being "just about sex."

Agreed. Honestly, if it weren't for the "ick" factor I could be bisexual, I think. Except for me being Catholic and that being wrong. :/ I can feel "attraction" toward either gender, I could cuddle/be intimate with either gender, it's the sexual organs where I identify myself as straight. So I dunno.

My apologies, I'm sure you're right, I've skipped around and haven't read anything near to all of the comments. But okay.

I thought that was the defining factor of identifying either "gay" or "straight?" Love, care, devotion are necessary in any intimate relationship, I don't see how that separates gay vs. straight at all.

I'm really asking. Why are you being vague?

but earlier, you said this: I cannot imagine a marriage where people feel that way about each other all the time, or even most of the time. I cannot think of one couple I know who has been together for 20+ years who radiates sexual energy like you are describing. *shrug*

what makes someone gay then, if it isn't sexual attraction that is the defining factor? I don't think Phil was trying to be a jerk. I think he's just a simple-minded, down-home guy who speaks what he thinks. I don't think he has any clue how he comes across in today's society, not that he would care all that much, but I don't think he meant to hurt anyone. He just simply cannot fathom how anyone would want to have gay sex, lol.

Thank you so much for the tip, I will do that. What if she asks for (demands) it? She's already requested we write something up. We've never been late on our rent, and there is no structural damage, other than what I mentioned above.

Seriously though, there are a ton of things I would get. An outdoor play place (jungle gym? Trampoline? Swing set?). More family games, Christmas gifts for next year, several essential oil diffusers for the house, picture frames, an air purifier, pet supplies, I could go on and on...........

Have I ever told you before how beautiful and wonderful you are........ :seeya: :001_tt1:

We are renters, and we are hoping to be long-term renters in our current house. We take good care of it (we have exterminators and carpet cleaners come twice a year, we do yard work, we keep it very clean given there are 9 people living here, we painted over the scuffed and ugly paint when we moved in) but as a big family, there are repairs that need to be done. For one, we need to replace our sliding glass door as our son broke 1 of the double panes. We have also broken curtains in 3 of the rooms, one of them is an ancient roller curtain with very heavy-duty, probably expensive curtains on it (but terribly outdated). There will be stains on the carpet and marks on walls. Our last landlord was an older guy who owned the property management place. The owner of our house doesn't even live in our state. The owner didn't seem to care all that much- he left a hole in a door, everything needed to be updated (and cleaned!), he left several pieces of furniture here, etc. We never did a walk-through with him or anything like that. The old guy who owned the property management place was very successful here in town so he wasn't a shady guy or anything, he was just really laid back, which is perfect for our family as it can be difficult to find rentals with a big family. For example, we had more people than legally "allowed" in bedrooms when we moved in, we had a dog, etc. None of that was ever a problem (thank God). Well, the old guy property manager had a hit put out on him, someone slit his throat and he has suffered brain damage and can no longer work. :crying: :blink: So there is this new lady managing our property. She wants to do an inspection and be all formal about things, and I am REALLY nervous that she's going to suddenly try to convince the owner that we can't live here because we have too many people. That's my main concern. We are a family of 9 and there are 3 bedrooms. Thankfully, she's a homeschooling mom herself (she has 4 grown kids) and she's nice enough, but she just seems really legalistic. She's coming tomorrow to do a walk-through inspection, and I want to know what I should do or write down beforehand (or after) to give our family the best chance we can of staying here. Should I hide a couple beds (there are 4 boys in a room right now, legally there should only be 2 :glare: ), should I make this really detailed list of everything that was wrong before we moved in (there weren't even smoke detectors, we didn't realize that until about a month ago and we've lived here 18 months!) or should I not worry about it?

I agree with what Martha said. I have 7 kids, 6 of them are boys age 8 and under. Maybe I will be phenomenally busy when they are all teens, but I hope not. I just posted a status on facebook about how I hate running around and just can't be the mom who is always running around. Being out for 2 hours running necessary errands this afternoon was stressful for me, and I had a lot to catch up on when I got back home. I like being at home. I don't mind the housework. My kids get quite a bit of screen time- the days are long, and I get lots of computer time each day- let's be real. But I'm not one who feels that I have to be hand holding my kids all the time, entertaining them, doing everything for them, etc. So I dunno.

I still don't understand why people find laminators so useful. I just cannot think of 1 thing that I have ever *needed* laminated. I'm still trying to convince myself I need one, though. lol

DP

LMAO!! He's got good points. I'd much rather be in my cozy home running after toddlers and cleaning than roofing in the middle of July.

I didn't read the comments yet, but I couldn't find an option that fit. I don't find staying at home with the kids particularly difficult, but maybe I'm lazier than most? I see my friends with younger kids or less kids than I have running after their kids constantly and trying to entertain them. I don't do that. We are always in the same room, but the younger ones are expected to keep themselves generally occupied playing together or whatever- I'm not hovering or chasing after them or entertaining them constantly. Meals are simple. So no, I don't find being home with my children particularly difficult, but it's my reality. I enjoy us all being home together- I don't like running around. I find THAT stressful; however, when my sister comes over and watches me make lunch or just listens to the children chattering she always says "I don't know how you do it." I DO find the sleepless nights, the crying and the noise, and the general neediness difficult. But I'm not sure getting ready and driving off to work and working somewhere else on someone else's timetable (ugh) and then having to come home and fix meals, etc, would be much easier.

Yes. Only I am able to call my children little shits. And only when they're being legitimately bad. lol

I agree that you did the right thing! It would be horrible if people hid that from them, and they ended up sick. Does the Crohn's cause this level of immunodeficiency?

I'm sorry, I see where that could have caused confusion. I just meant that as Christians, we are supposed to or even required to work on developing those qualities, and since it does take concerted effort to not lash out when offended, be gentle, be loving, be kind, especially when people don't agree with you (love your enemy and all of that), if one doesn't believe those are important or valuable qualities, maybe for the reasons Rebekah mentioned, why would they go out of their way to practice them? Agreed. you're probably right. And I'm more quiet IRL too, for the same reason, so that makes sense. I also hide my more controversial facebook posts from people who know me IRL or who I know will be offended, for the same reason. :tongue_smilie: And no, I don't go out of my way to interact only with Christians.

FWIW this all started for me when I saw that albeto said that both atheists and Christians alike display the Christ-like qualities that Milovany described way back on page 1 or 2. I was disagreeing, based on what I have observed through the years I've been on this board (this board has the largest group of atheists I have ever been around).

The qualities were what I was defining as part of the quoted post from myself. The quoted post was my original post, and I posted it again as clarification for what I meant. I think we're talking past each other? Because you don't seem to be understanding what I'm saying, and I'm not understanding what you're saying...? When you say I think it's impossible for atheists to develop certain attributes because they are too lazy, no, I never said that, that's not what I meant, that's not what I believe.

Rebekah and Laura, thank you for your posts. That does help me understand a lot. Possibly. I don't have too many negative one-on-one encounters, and ironically, those often happen with fundamentalist Christians. They really seem to dislike me. :) What I said is: Kindness: the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate. Tenderness: gentleness and kindness.

if you had quoted my actual post, you would have seen that is not what I said. You keep repeating I said "atheists are too lazy" or "it is impossible for atheists to do any good" or something along those lines, when that is nonsense and not what I said at all. nak

unsinkable, your message box is full.

that's also not what I said. Again. It's amazing how just twisting one or two words can create hysteria and meaning that wasn't meant to be there.