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DesertBlossom

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Everything posted by DesertBlossom

  1. No, I had not heard about the mass grave in Puerto Penasco despite being close. I know dozens of families who vacation there regularly who feel it's safe enough to travel there. I haven't been to Mexico in over 20 years and I likely won't ever go back. No thanks.
  2. Some of these families have been there for nearly 100 years. I don't know about this family specifically, but these communities have been there for a long time, probably long before the cartels ran the place.
  3. I don't know if I should comment on the other thread and resurrect it or just comment here... but I am super curious about the pronged collars mentioned by others. We have taken our GR on one walk and he did okayish. But a couple weeks ago when I took him to the vet he went NUTS. He couldn't have cared less about my pocket full of treats, he was going to play with all the dogs in the waiting room. He's already 60 lbs and strong so we ended up waiting outside because he would not stop lunging and settle down. Is a collar like that appropriate for new situations like that? I was already being judged by the other dog moms because of my giant ill-mannered puppy, but anything would have been better than how he was acting.
  4. I just want to say thanks for all the puppy talk. A couple months ago we tragically lost both our dogs so we had all been scouring the internet to fill that hole in our hearts. DH was set on getting an Australian Shepherd but told me it might be a year before he found the right dog. So I found a sweet 7 month Golden Retriever mix that needed to be rehomed because of the owner's health issues. Two days after bringing him home DH drove 13 hours to pick up a 9 week old aussie. *face palm* For the last 3 weeks I have been up to my eyeballs in puppy training. It's part "THIS IS AWESOME!" and part "WHAT ON EARTH HAVE WE DONE?" Lol. I am on page 2 of the epic puppy training thread linked above. It has been helpful. My younger self never would have identified as a dog person, but somehow I am now. I kinda get why the OP's new friend might say weird stuff. 😄 Good luck and I hope the pup doesn't get dog-napped. Speaking of-- what is the best age for microchips? I am kinda paranoid about losing this aussie because we have never spent that much money on a dog, and she is stinking adorable.
  5. There used to be a man with a long gray beard who would ride his bike up and down Main Street wearing headphones, waving his hands around dancing and singing. There may have been preaching as well. He passed away a few years ago though. We have seen a significant increase in our homeless population in recent years. A lot of our street corners have regular panhandlers. And it's not uncommon to see people walking down the street, definitely high on drugs and acting odd. I know that's not eccentric or unique... but it makes for some serious conversations when my kids ask why people are acting that way.
  6. Has he been evaluated for tongue tie or lip tie? By someone who really knows a lot about it? We caught my baby's tongue tie early (it was really obvious) but he had already lost over a pound in 3 days by the time we made it in to see an IBCLC and had it revised. I thought he just was tired/lazy but his latch was immediately better as soon as it was clipped. I have heard of cases if FTT because of undiagnosed tongue ties. I would definitely look into it.
  7. I am sure that is a more appropriate use of it. But we were instructed to take it daily. But it wasn't solving the overall problem and he ended up taking it for months with no end in sight. I was frustrated with the dr's lack of help. It was "take Miramax and eat more fruit." Thanks, but not all that helpful. Especially when accidentally skipping a day made things so much worse. All other supplements and remedies he ended up taking were things I looked up and sought out on my own.
  8. All of your replies have been really helpful. Thank you. I asked him some more questions today and relieved to hear that this problem has only recently resurfaced. I was worried it had been going on the last couple years and he wasn't telling me. He says that he started to drink more milk and that's why-- it's probably not that simple though. But apparently it's just been the last 6 weeks to 2 months. (still too long, obviously) I suspect if he got backed up that maybe he started holding it, causing more issues. I'm not inspecting the toilet or his bottom, so this is all coming from him. But he says he is passing very large, round balls and there is bright red blood. I really like the water bottle and I will do that. As far as going to the bathroom right after eating... we always do "dinner chores" right after dinnder, and a lot of the time he runs to the bathroom to spend 20 minutes there. We kinda joke he's just trying to get out of chores, but I think eating dinner triggers his BMs. And he takes for.ever. So he's not rushing the process at all, for sure. I like the idea of the fruit paste. He's not a picky eater by anyone else's standards, but I doubt I could get him to eat that though. We were having decent luck with just 6-8 oz of prune juice every day. He hated it, but he would tolerate it. And I suppose the alternative was worse than the juice. I think we may go back to that because it's easy and fairly painless. I probably do need to evaluate his diet better. We eat a wide variety of things, but I can't say I carefully monitor anyone's diet besides the nursling. That's hard to do.
  9. I couldn't say... I don't monitor. We have a water dispenser readily available. Water is definitely his main liquid, but I couldn't tell you how much. As for exercise, he's a typical kid. Doesn't watch a lot of TV, so he is up a moving a lot. But he is not currently in a sport. (other times of the year he does basketball and swimming)
  10. He actually brought this up again about 6 weeks ago. I had some leftover magnesium calm from pregnancy. He hated drinking that so I ordered some magnesium supplements and started giving him some probiotics and enzymes again. Then we went on a week long vacation and it all fell off my radar until last night. He's definitely one of those people who can only go in their own toilet. He'll hold it on camping trips, for example. But I don't know that he's holding it in general. Unless that was a learned thing from the initial constipation and subsequent pain. He does take a really long time in the bathroom.
  11. I may delete for the sake of privacy for the child involved. Do not quote. DS9 started having hard bowel movements when he was a preschooler that resulted in bloody stool. I suspected it was because he drank a lot of milk and was generally a picky eater, but I took him to a pediatric GI. One of my concerns was that immediately after a BM there was a dark purple.... bulge... on his anus. Not like an external hemorrhoid. But it was only there immediately after a BM. When I brought it up to the Ped GI about the purple bulge she gave me this look.... like she didn't believe me? I don't know. Anyway. She put him on Miralax and suggested more fiber and fruit in his diet. Well, the miralax was awful. It did soften his BMs, but if we ever forgot even one day, the day after was horrific. Screaming agony. It was awful. I took him to this Ped GI at least twice and these were her only suggestions ever. After reading about the dangers of long-tern miralax use in children, I took DS off it. We managed the hard BMs with daily doses of prune juice, probiotics, and digestive enzymes. He might not have gotten all 3 every day, but at least something every day. It worked and it was fine. We did this for at least 2 years. Maybe 3? I figured he needed some time to heal. Eventually, we phased out and quit giving him those things and I have assumed he was fine. I'm no longer the one wiping his bottom so I don't actually see it anyway. Well, it has been brought to my attention that this is happening again and has been for a while. (hard BMs and blood, apparently quite a bit of it) *Cue mommy guilt* I am putting him back on supplements, but the question I keep asking myself is WHY?! Why is this happening? He is not a picky eater anymore. Besides tomatoes, he eats almost anything. And while we aren't health nuts, we eat a wide variety of foods and he likes his vegetables. He does not drink a lot of milk anymore or consume excessive cheese. He is otherwise incredibly healthy and as far as I can remember, he hasn't ever been on antibiotics. Could there be a physical reason for this? Or is he just very prone to constipation and will need prune juice for the rest of his life? I mentioned taking him to the doctor again and he wanted to die at the thought. He remembers the doctor closely inspecting his bottom and is so embarrassed. But I am concerned. If I do take him back to the Ped GI (maybe a different one this time?) I'd like to have a solid plan or least a whole new set of questions to be asking.
  12. I have been known to say things like "you mispronounced 'thank you for making me dinner mom.'" Or if they say they hate something I tell them that's not nice but they can say "this isn't my favorite." There are lots of things that aren't their favorite. 🙄 I can deal with it if it's not their favorite. But I can't deal with rude.
  13. I have tried to respond to this several times and can't find quite the right words, but I am going to try. Something about saying that the presence of a nursing mother could be a stumbling block for a man really bothers me. It is my personal belief that God holds mothers and children in the highest regard. I think it by divine design that woman nurture and care for babies the way we do. And if there were something inherently.... stumbling block-ish about nursing, God would have designed women's bodies differently.
  14. Deleted quote for privacy. But I asked my husband too and he gave essentially the exact same answer. However, I know that he wouldn't expect a woman to leave the room to make him more comfortable. And if someone asked ME to leave the room while nursing he'd he upset on my behalf. And I agree wholeheartedly with Maize that infants and mothers do not need to be the ones to accommodate others.
  15. Here is where I sheepishly admit that sometimes I use breastfeeding as an excuse to leave a room. Like when the ILs are visiting and my introverted self can't take it anymore.... I go and nurse the baby in our bedroom. 😄
  16. Nobody is trying to make anyone uncomfortable. If a person feels uncomfortable with a breastfeeding mother in the room, that says more about them than it does about the mother. Nursing mothers are not trying to make a point. Their baby just wants to eat. If *I* feel uncomfortable, because my clothing isn't nursing friendly or whatever, I will leave the room. But I don't have to leave because it makes someone else uncomfortable to be reminded that babies eat from breasts.
  17. I think the issue for me is that it shouldn't make people uncomfortable. We need to change that about our culture. We need to get to a point where women nursing discreetly don't raise any eyebrows. I think we are where we are because breastfeeding rates dropped so low for such a long time that people aren't used to seeing it. My SIL said that before having her own babies she did not know anyone who breastfed. In other countries where breastfeeding rates are much higher, nobody cares because they see it all. the. time. I am at the point in my life that if I suffered a wardrobe malfunction or baby ripped the blanket off or if someone happened to get a .02 second glance at my breast..... yawn. Like who cares? It's a boob. And nobody even got a good look at it. I would much much rather send the message to the world that breastfeeding babies is totally normal, not something that needs to be hidden in a back room. Breastfeeding moms NEED support if they are going to be successful. They do not need to make strangers comfortable before they can make their babies comfortable.
  18. Just had an enlightening conversation with DH. 😄 He says if a woman was bfing discreetly in the same room it wouldn't bother him at all. (And he has seen me nurse anywhere and everywhere, always discreetly, and he doesn't bat an eye- very supportive because baby eats when baby needs to eat) He says if he was a having a face to face conversation with a woman who was bfing he would be "mildly to moderately uncomfortable" because he wouldn't want to be perceived as the kind of guy who was trying to sneak a peak. I can assure you he is not that kind of guy though. So it's funny to me that it would make him uncomfortable. But I get it... I wouldn't nurse without a blanket if I was talking face to face with a man. But on the sidelines of a soccer game, to give an example from today, I know no one is close enough to get a good look at anything should baby pop off and flash nipple at everyone ... when no one is looking at me anyway.
  19. Actually, I have one story! A few weeks ago I was nursing in a church meeting of all women. I don't remember if I had a blanket or not, but it was discreet. I noticed an older woman staring at me. After the meeting she asked me if I had been nursing my baby. I braced myself for a comment about the appropriateness of it, but then she asked me HOW I was breastfeeding in a dress. I excitedly told her it was a nursing dress. Lol. Here is my plug for latchedmama.com nursing clothes. I wish these had been a thing and that I had know about them before baby #7. 😄 I have a couple dresses and a couple of their shirts. They are convenient. Sometimes where I nurse depends on what I am wearing because shirts do ride up in the back when I nursing. But nursing shirts are awesome for that!
  20. Mel's Kitchen Cafe's 30 minutes meals and slow cooker recipes. I enjoy cooking but I do get tired of it. For my sake I need to vary things and try new meals now and then to keep things interesting. I keep thinking I am going to start handing this responsibility over to my kids, but I can't give up the control of the menu just yet.
  21. Who knows what she was thinking. But I would have responded the same way. In my combined 9 years of breastfeeding, I have NIP in all sorts of places and I don't think anyone has ever said anything to me. Even in very public places, or squashed between strangers on a plane, etc. I think it helps to have a nice polite "I know what I am doing so don't bother me" smile or a resting b!tch face. Either one works well.
  22. I want to add exterior shutters to our windows. The downstairs windows are taller because our ceilings are higher. So I need 59 inch shutters downstairs and 47 inch shutters upstairs. The taller shutters that Home Depot carries have 3 vertical slats and the shorter ones have 2. (see pictures) Is that going to look weird? I can find taller shutters with just 2 vertical slats from a different maker, but then the cost goes up significantly... and quite frankly out of budget.
  23. I don't know. I think in this case she needs to be told outright that this is not okay.
  24. I worry that young men these days aren't being taught or don't see modeled healthy dating behavior. Our culture has shifted away from traditional dating and it feels a little bit like a free for all now. No rules for normal behavior. Just swipe right (or is it left?) and you're good to go. It's no wonder some kids really suck at figuring out how to get in and stay in healthy relationships.
  25. I think modeling healthy sexually behavior and attitudes is important. That includes how we talk about people we know who have had unplanned pregnancies, or porn addictions, etc. We set some pretty impossibly high standards for ourselves in all aspects of our life, but we all mess up somehow, sometime. And it's okay. Even when we make really big, life-altering mistakes. Hopefully no one is using the "licked cupcake" or "chewed gum" analogies anymore because those are absolutely damaging. Let your kids know that you love them, no matter what. And that forgiveness and peace is attainable no matter how big or small the mistake.
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