Yeah. And I’m trying to set up a tour on Wed (the guy is busy Tues) with my dad and both kids. The kids might be bored (at least, dd). But it will be nice to have them come. Wed ds and I might rent the Good Burger 2 movie to stream. He wants to watch and it doesn’t go to theatres. I explained that the characters came from an old 90s show I used to watch and showed him YouTube clips. He had no idea. DD’s birthday is coming up but I won’t have her that day. So we’ll be sure to get frozen yogurt or something. We’re all on the way to eat at a restaurant (it’s closed Wed) now.

The background check cleared. Drug test should process within a few days. But they went ahead and gave me a letter for landlords. In the letter it says that my pay will go up after one year (yay).

Nm

I sent an email to HR asking for a letter as soon as the background check/drug test clears. She said yes. —— edited because they accidentally sent me a message intended for someone else and scared the crap out of me.

Ds saw I was upset earlier and comforted me. Tonight we finally made it to the gym together. It was a really nice time together. We did machines side by side, then would swap. We finished with cardio on side-by-side treadmills. I was today years old when I realized those giant barbells are quite heavy without any weights on the sides. Too heavy for me! He’s into fitness & eating better so that’s a shared interest. Apparently he has a treadmill at his home and I asked if the adults used it. He said no lol. He said xh hasn’t taken him to a gym in several months when xh was on a diet. I am not real surprised. Xh never sticks with things. https://youtube.com/shorts/bVxoKLFcxY4?si=1k11nPZ1qc_LFKkn

I’m more upset about lackluster relationships IRL than this moving thing. I just wish I had a partner during this. My ex and I talked a couple times and made plans that never came to fruition. I feel the drifting. I guess I wanted to believe him when he initially said he’d be ok with long distance. But we couldn’t even make it work with all the obstacles (mostly him being pulled in a million directions). So even if I got the Mobile job it was too hard. That ex best friend reached out to me a couple times. First time I ignored her. Second time I spoke to her. But no apology was given. And I really didn’t need her back in my life. Because the last thing I need is harsh temperament/critical interactions. Saw this video reel where someone said you gotta ask for apologies or people think they can do whatever and just carry on like it’s ok. So today I told her how I felt and her immediate response was where is this coming from (who cares, apologize). There was some back and forth and she twisted my words and ended the conversation with an “f you.” I’m ok because I don’t want to keep people around that will do that. Seems like everyone I care about IRL ghosts me or fades away.

Ok

I think it’s the age. I’m not 20 years old. And we can’t even always agree on what seems safe or unsafe so the notion that he wants to check out the neighborhood (like to see if it feels safe) doesn’t really mean much to me. At what age does a person loan money without being in the store with you? He also follows me to the gas station if he gets gas for me. He won’t use the pump payment option because of skimmers so he parks, comes to my pump, goes inside with his cc, then back to the pump. It’s a whole thing. It makes me feel like a kid. And yes, I know I’m his kid.

Yes exactly. I was just explaining because every so many weeks someone suggests I foster her lol

I was told she’d need all shots up-to-date to foster. That’s the only reason I even thought about it. She’s indoors only.

Yeah I’ll have to. And I’m aware there’s a chance the library can say oops the background check is still not done so come back in Dec. And no letter for a couple more weeks.

My dad is saying if I get a letter from the library he’d go with me to view places and do the deposit. I am irritated because now it feels as though any place I looked at without him doesn’t have his approval. I said do you want to go because you just want to go or because you want to physically write the check (vs transferring the money to me). He said, “well it’s my money.” I told him I hate this control dynamic and that’s why I don’t go grocery shopping with him as he’ll determine what’s suitable to go into the grocery cart. I just don’t know how to get along with him. That’s a bigger reason than my cat for not living with him. My nosy aunt came to this conclusion that my son is constipated and told my dad. He asked ds and ds said no. Now my dad is saying my kids are constipated if they have a bowel movement once a day or every other day. I said isn’t that pretty normal? He said you should have one after every meal. I said well then I’d rather be deemed constipated! Next he points out my son was coughing and he wanted permission to give him colloidal silver (which I tried for my cough weeks ago and seemingly did nothing). I said yes you may offer it but not pressure him to take it. Can you imagine going to someone’s house and worrying they are talking about your bowel movements?! Butt out!!! No pun intended. (anyone else get Gilmore Girls vibes? Annoying parents control the money)

The price is only one reason I avoid her vaccines. She’s kinda small and they don’t adjust the vaccine dose based on weight so it takes a huge toll on her. I confirmed this with the last vet when she got shots. She wasn’t herself for days. I don’t know about the clinic rates but my ex worked at the humane society before and may know.

Time to make BFFs at work — can I stay at your place for a month or two?? 🥺 😆

I’ll stay in the extended stay but in my mind that means losing the $900 unit and potentially getting stuck with a $1100 unit which means when I do get checks I’ll be putting $200/mo toward rent that could have gone toward debt. 🤦🏻‍♀️ I don’t know if I can get a straight answer to that. But I do know it wouldn’t be just a couple weeks. I imagine my first full size check won’t arrive til like mid Jan. Just a hunch.

I know he says he’ll pay for the extended stay, but literally a week ago he was saying he needs to pay for this new roof and I’m thinking ok you want to pay for the cv joint and extended stay but not just give me the money for deposit?? I feel like this will bite me in the ass later. My parents are notorious for guilt trips! Oh you don’t have to pay it back but we’ll remind you of all the money we gave you. So then I’ll feel in debt forever. And in a few weeks we’ll have to contact my lawyer to adjust the visitation so that’s another bill. I just don’t want to go deeper into this power dynamic with my dad. “What? You don’t want to visit? After all I’ve done for you??” I hope for some this makes sense. He stresses me out. But if I got a NOLA roommate I’d need to commit 6 months and I’m sure there would be issues having the kids visit. I’m trying very hard to rely less and less on my dad but life is making that hard. And I glanced at Air BNB options but they are expensive and max you can reserve is a month. I’ll contact the library Monday and ask how often they pay.

apparently he thinks I should run up a huge extended stay bill and he’ll pay it because he knows best 🙄 Then later it will be thrown in my face. I absolutely will not drive 3 hrs a day to the library. That’s what it would be if I commuted from my friend’s. Also, her family is anticipating me moving out soon and their home is full. She has 3 kids, is pregnant, has pets, and her bf (it’s his house) and occasionally his kids are there. Foster care - nope. Requires the cat can get along with others. She can’t. Proven by the cat fights at the last place. Also requires updated rabies shot which would cost me a $200 vet fee. I have no concern she has rabies but they require the shots. I looked into this months ago and the person that fosters said my cat would not be a good candidate for fostering. Stay with my dad - his house is even further from NOLA than my friend’s and I do not want to stay with him for months or commute 3 hrs daily. The library closes at 7 pm some days. One paystub may take a month. A few checks could take several. They hired others recently and 4 of us start on Nov 27. I do have a job. I do have a start date.

I won’t turn it down exactly but I’d rather bypass the extended stay completely. I’ll feel in debt to him for the ~$86/night rate. I won’t burden my friend with my cat. For one, her dog is vicious toward cats and there is always a chance of a mishap. Two, she’s pregnant and I’d rather her not scooping a litter box. If the library pays once a month and I start Nov 27, I will have either a partial pay period check mid Dec or no check at all. That won’t be enough to cover everything. And I won’t sell the W/D unless I’ve secured a unit that comes with one. So I really can’t sell them yet. The longer I stall on moving, the longer I pay on the current storage unit. Everything feels messy. I get maybe I should be patient but I’ve literally lived in 2 hotels, my dad’s home, a room rental and my gf’s room since July. My mental health is like “ENOUGH. I want my own place and I don’t want to spend Christmas in a hotel room.” Of course, I’ll do whatever I have to do. Because I have no choice.

There’s a gray are. The question section asks if you have a start date. And the employee I spoke to for the WIN job center said well once you list the start date it’ll kick you out of the system. So I haven’t done that.

I was offered a last min babysitting job tonight but I said no because dd is under the weather plus ds is here. I’m just so frustrated. I did get financial help from the hive and I greatly appreciate that. I think Monday might end my unemployment but I’m not sure because the drug test and background check are pending. So I don’t know when to report the new start date. I might drag it out another week on the basis that it’s pending.

The commute is the issue. My car sucks. We’re gonna take it to the autoshop Monday to fix the cv joint but that’s another thing for my dad to hold over my head. 😓 With the fixed cv joint, it still acts up because the transmission is going out. Driving it round trip daily 3 hrs is not possible.

I was gifted the unit from my old parish and know it ballparks $1000 for the set new. It’s a few years old now. They are not top of the line and the washer is a top loader. The typical 1 bedroom is more than $900 unless you live in a sketchier area. 😬 I have not come across such a thing as a payment plan for move in costs. They will just rent to whoever has the funds. I’m so mad my dad talks like the drug test is a factor. I’m not gonna fail it!! I even asked if any of my prescriptions would affect my results and the employee said no.

Ok I just pressed and he said no. He’s being so controlling & annoying!!! 😒 his birthday is in a few days so I feel like an ass for arguing with him but come on.

My relative said they don’t do loans. My dad said if I went into it with the attitude that I’ll be there the full 12 months that’s understandable (duh!! I wouldn’t sign that kind of contract then accept an AL job etc). But I haven’t been able to get a clear cut “ok I’ll give you the money so you can secure it” yet. The $1100/mo home is good on paper (haven’t toured) and slightly closer to the library but I can’t really justify paying that much more per month when both locations are only 1 bedroom. I’m still hoping to secure the $900 one just so I can throw money at my debt faster. And feel more comfortable getting a car note. If he would just hurry up and let me secure it, I could sell my W/D and pay him back part right away.

The $1100/mo 1 BD does include laundry. He said it’s stacked units in the hall (no pic online) and he typically doesn’t charge a pet fee but if there are damages at move out then that’s another story. Very chill and not strict on breaking lease. You will get your deposit back if you move out with no issues after 12 months. He would need the letter from the library so I couldn’t apply til after background check cleared and it may be off market then.