Well, it seems like a lot. My dd is in pharmacy school (an 0-6 Pharm.D. program) and she is incurring debt, but not at that amount but after she finishes it may be that much or more because the last two years are considered grad school and the scholarship amounts are lower. We are paying out of our pockets to the tune of $10,000 plus a year right now, and she won an outside scholarship from hubby's employer. She also works and she was able to save close to $3,000 last summer toward tuition. She puts 80% of her check away to put toward tuition. Plus, next year, she'll make more $ because she'll have an intern license. As for the debt, we took into account her choice of career. Pharmacists around here (in retail pharmacy) are in high demand and start at around $130,000 per year with hefty sign on bonuses of about $30,000 right now. Her college has a 100 percent placement rate. I don't feel uncomfortable for her coming out with what might be considered hefty debt because she will have a job that pays well. If she were going into a field that wasn't in high demand, etc. I would have advised her not to take on a lot of debt. We were also pretty confident that she would see the program through. She isn't the type who changes her mind about things like this. She's slow to decide what she wants but once she makes up her mind, that's it. Now, in engineering, I know that there are co-op programs out there were kids will go to classes two quarters and work one. Those would be five years and I imagine debt goes way down that way. I don't know if those are available in civil engineering or not, but your ds might want to look into that. If your ds has his heart set on this school and there is no better option for him to achieve the same thing cheaper, I would probably not discourage him. BUT I would make sure he understands he has an obligation to work to pay toward this and get that debt amount down. There are options at most schools, like being an RA in his second year that can lower the amount because they'd give him his room for free. If it's a four-year program and he gets through in time, he'll be quite young. He could move home for a few years and really pay that debt down quickly. Even if he meets his future wife at college, there's no reason a 22 year old needs to marry right away IMHO, especially with that kind of debt. He should work to pay it down so he can *then* build his future with someone else. Just my opinion on that. When we first got my dd's financial aid package, I about fell over. LOL. I thought we could never do it. But we're managing. You really need to lay it all out, see what options are available, etc. You know your son best. If he's a responsible, thrifty kid, he'll probably be fine. If he's not, well, the debt may cause issues later. Just some random thoughts... Good luck!

Daisy, My fifth grade dd 11 is doing AO Year 3 this year. It is plenty challenging for her, and she is quite an advanced reader to begin with. It's a great time period in history, too. She has loved all the readings but for Parables of Nature. She is doing much better with Pilgrim's Progress than when she started the year. I think you are making a fabulous choice. We love AO. We used Rod and Staff for English last year. This year, we are using Junior Analytical Grammar. Because AO does copywork and narration (Charlotte Mason style language arts) for writing, we much prefer just having JAG and doing it only for grammar as opposed to doing Rod and Staff, which includes writing lessons. For spelling, we use Sequential Spelling. Ambleside is a wonderful and free option for homeschoolers. I feel so blessed to have found it and to be able to benefit from all the work others have put into creating AO. Honestly, if your daughter will be a young fourth grader next year, you could also do Year 2 and it would likely also be plenty challenging IMHO. You really can't compare AO years to grade levels. There are great AO Yahoo groups that you can join for more information. Best, Anita

How about the YMCA? They have lots of activities for kids of all ages. I know that they have swim teams, too, though I don't know how much extra that costs. Also, the Y (I think) will offer financial assistance. For music, perhaps your kids could continue with school band, or you could maybe find a college kid or even high school who could give lessons at a low cost and come to your home. Then, there's Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts, too. As for curriculum, we use Ambleside. It's free but for the cost of the books, many of which are free online. Best wishes, Anita

He's so young. My dd is 8 and will be 9 in a few months. Some of what I experienced in the past with her is similar to what you describe--angry meltdowns. We decided to homeschool her because I felt it would help her more than public school, but school wasn't the worst thing, either! Really. She enjoyed the OT, the resource room time, etc. The hard part was the social aspect, but I think if other kids are made aware of the fact that a child has special needs and needs extra help, they can be helpful and kind and inclusive. Your son may like school. I also second the questions asked as to whether you have him in OT? GFCF diet has helped my child a great deal, too. Have you read, Is This Your Child by Doris Rapp? Wonderful book. You bring up the possibility of meds, and that's your call, but before *I* would medicate my child, I'd make sure that my dc had a solid evaluation done, that I tried occupational and behavior modification type therapy, and that I also closely looked at diet. Plus, I would really consider sending him to school to give you both a break, kwim? A special needs child is a lot to deal with all day long every day. I know that first-hand. Mine is my youngest and I have one more child at home who is 11 and a very easy child, and it is still very hard. JMHO... Anita

With the food issue, I have a cousin who would serve up whatever they didn't eat the night before. It seems harsh but I so envy the peaceful life with regard to food because her children eat what's on the table. What I wouldn't give to cook a meal my kids actually ate. It's really, really hard. Anita

your daughter is just beautiful! You know, it's so hard, isn't it, to have a child who's behind where we think they should be or others think they should be? I have a dd 8 who's doing AO Year 1, and who is doing Year 1 MEP Math. She's reading at grade level. Her handwriting has come light years. So, she's progressing, but she's not at grade level across the board, nowhere near in some areas. I said yesterday to dh, this child is a doer not a reader. I'm not sure that I will ever be able to turn her into a child who is in love with books or higher math. Put her in the yard, have her garden, clean, do dishes, bake with me, she's happy as can be. She wants to work and do things not sit and read or be read to. She'll play games willingly. She enjoys piano. She loves karate. She tolerates doing read alouds with AO. She used to hate when I pulled the books out but we started so slowly she didn't really know what hit her when we built up to longer sections. ;) My goal for her now is to just keep on keeping on. I'm no expert, but if I were in your shoes, I, honestly, would just keep on keeping on with her. I'd focus on the basics right now. Let her focus on things she loves, but along with that she's got to do math, reading, and writing. Maybe ACE Paces is a good idea as someone suggested. Some reading below grade level to help with fluency, and then, I'd also probably make a point to choose books for her to read and I'd read the same book so we could discuss. Get her talking about what she's reading. And one thing I read recently that I thought was a great idea was to have your dc keep a journal in which they just record some things they learned that day. A daily record of what they're learning/reading/working on. I loved this idea. Good luck with whatever you decide! Anita

and this year, we started AO. We LOVE it! We still do get plenty of time to focus on reading, writing, and math. I have been so blown away by Charlotte Mason. It's exactly what I want for my children. It was really hard to let go of the push to "teach" writing at an early age or go heavy on grammar. I'm getting there, though. I've been reading When Children Love to Learn, and it's a great resource. It may seem like AO/CM covers many, many things, but a lot of it takes almost no time. For example, artist study takes minutes a week for us. Someone else mentioned Draw Write Now--we agree here, it's a great program. Even my 11 year old loves it, so it's not just for younger kids. And my dd 8 who has lots of learning challenges can achieve success with this. An easy way to do art. Sequential Spelling is a huge hit, and it seems to be working. Another thing that we have come to love are Singapore's Challenging Word Problems. These are the things that truly stand out in my mind as being things I wouldn't want to be without. Anita

I can only offer up our experience. My dd's 11 and 8 take piano and they recently started violin lessons. Violin isn't cello but it's a string instrument. I played piano as a child, so working with them on piano and having that knowledge, has helped. I know nothing about playing strings. They take private lessons and playing a string instrument seems to just involve so much. For example, how to hold the bow. My girls have been working and working on this. The teacher wants to make sure they do this right before they move on because she feels fixing bad habits later is hard. So, IMHO, perhaps you could manage to do some lessons initially at least so that your dd can learn how to hold the bow and all the other technical things involved. I find myself quite overwhelmed trying to help them with the violin. It's HARD at least for me!:confused: I honestly believe that self teaching piano is a much easier thing. This is all just my humble opinion and inexperienced opinion. Best of luck! Anita

You know, for us, we saw results almost immediately. I have heard that there is a period of withdrawal, so that can cause even more troublesome behavior. Over the last almost 3 months, my dd's piano teacher has noticed a difference of dd being more focused and calmer. We see it. She's not as fixated, doesn't have as many meltdowns. When she has a meltdown, she's easier to redirect. She interacts better. It's like her issues are not as obvious if that makes sense. Oh, and one thing I have noticed as I think about it, she used to be addicted to sweet drinks--if she could get a hold of Sprite, she'd guzzle a 20 ounce bottle in record time. That has definitely subsided with her. All that said, I agree it's really important to not substitute gfcf junk food. We certainly did some of that initially just to get her off the other stuff. But I think my child reacts to dyes, for example. So, I'm trying to slowly get that stuff out as well. I also am giving her a supplement called Behavior Balance, which someone on here mentioned. I also think you could look into adding in probiotics. I have heard you need to stick with this for 6 months to know if it really works. I've read great things about SCD as well. The way I looked at it, for her, it couldn't hurt because her diet was so restricted anyhow. She definitely eats more variety now than she did before going gfcf. Best, Anita