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Everything posted by hjffkj

  1. No, I see the two as separate too but the idea that she was able to sacrifice herself and be at peace with her life, which is the feeling I got from End Game negates the need for her to atone personally on screen, at least for me. I did enjoy the movie to some extent, just didn't feel like it was a necessary movie to make once End Game had ended her storyline. That is of course unless her story isn't actually over
  2. But the fact that it was created after her death washes out any need for her to atone, because us as the viewers have already seen her ultimate sacrifice for humanity. So for me, that part of the film had almost zero impact.
  3. I would honestly make it a condition of you visiting and speaking to him that he consent to you being able to talk to his doctors. You can not have any construction communication or any form of relationship if you are not in the loop with his medical care.
  4. Not counting formalwear, 90% of my wardrobe is my guess. My wardrobe is pretty minimal and I wear things until they are no longer wearable.
  5. we watched it and found it suitable for our 9, 11, and 12 year old. I enjoyed it but found it to be an unnecessary movie to be made. I felt her story should have ended upon her death and that if they wanted to do a back story movie it should have been before that happened.
  6. I think she was trying to gauge whether her decision to not cut contact with the other person was the correct thing to do in the situation of a jealous spouse brought on by mental illness. It is easy to know the correct answer in your heart but still need to talk it out with people, who in general, have good advice and are supportive.
  7. With what OP's dh is going through it is certainly something that one can come back from. This is not his normal behavior and is a direct result of serious trauma that has caused extensive mental health issues. Simply walking away isn't necessarily the best thing to do. But setting up healthy boundaries while her dh heals is.
  8. Adding that separation for me would never lead to divorce, as I do not believe in it. But permanent separation isn't off the table if that is what is needed for the health and safety of those involved.
  9. I think cutting off contact would be the correct thing to do if your relationship was strained for non mental health reasons. But with what your dh is going through the healthy thing for you to do is to not enable him and set clear boundaries that you will support him in getting healthy but you will not take part in the disordered thinking
  10. With the added info, I would encourage him to up his individual therapy, reassure him that nothing is going on, and continue the relationship with the other person as it is. I'd gently explain to my dh that he is in an unhealthy mindset and that this person loves your family enough to help out during a family mental health crisis. If he weren't able to accept that he is having a mental health crisis I would seek a separation with the aim that he focuses on healing himself and once he is able that you both start working on your marriage. I'd make sure I was in a safe place to have that conversation in case he reacted badly. Separations that lead to reconciliation are possible but both people have to be healthy for that to happen
  11. In that situation, I would ask for couples counselling in order to get to the root of the issues in our marriage that were causing him to not trust me. And if he agreed, I'd agree to distance myself from said person as we work through things but I wouldn't immediately agree to cutting contact entirely. Id also spend serious time considering if he may be seeing something I don't on my relationship with that person. Even if I thought it was his paranoia creating these issues I'd still respect our marriage enough to consider it might not be.
  12. @heartlikealion sending good selling vibes your way. Good luck
  13. e-bay sales are trickling in nicely this month. sold an item for $40 today. Also, hit up goodwill and found 4 solid brass christmas stocking hangers that I can likely get $80 for. Just have to polish them up. Also, a Honda hat I have to do some research on. Only went to Goodwill because I had a breakdown dropping my sil back off at the hospital after she spent the night away and I just needed to not go home yet and spend some time to myself. Today the goal is to take pictures of 6 items so when dh gets home tonight I can sit next to him and list while he does some work so he can enjoy his week off next week entirely.
  14. On a fun ebay update: I've sold 3 items the last 2 days for roughly $60 net profit. This is without listing new items and simply sending out offers. I also went to Salvation Army while kids were at dance and spent $18 on roughly $200 worth of items just from rough math but of course that can change. Those items are already in my ebay drafts, once I get pictures they'll be listed. I'm aiming for $500 net this month so I gotta keep listing
  15. yeah, we seriously probably could fix this ourselves but we are overextended to the max right now with other house things we are doing ourselves and with helping my brother while the baby is in the hospital. Neither dh or I have the energy to research the repair so we're just paying it. Thankfully, one of the projects we are doing ourselves is saving us $1000 so it is completely worth it. If we weren't already doing that we might have delved into this repair. Usually we replace if we can't repair ourselves
  16. I know. It is a higher end dryer and a larger capacity so we'll pay for the fix. But if it needs another repair within the next few years we'll replace it.
  17. some years are just like that. In those years I pull back my expectations A LOT and focus more on mindful spending than saving. I certainly feel like the last few months have negated a good portion of the savings I was able to do at the beginning of the year. I'm trying so hard to handle everything without pulling out of our long-term savings and so far have been able to but if things keep piling up I don't know how I'll manage.
  18. Thankfully the other twin is allowed to stay at the hospital with mom and dad. So, they are all in the same room with the sick baby. And they live across the street from me so my mom and I have the older kids handled. But I know my brother is exhausted because he has been coming home to shower and visit his older kids. Lots of driving.
  19. yeah me neither. I've always heard you don't give kids under 1 honey because of botulism risk and they certainly didn't do that. But apparently it is endemic in the soil and the dr even said that it could have been in her formula. But most likely one of the many kids in the house carried it in from the soil and she picked it up that way. So scary
  20. So, it is botulism that she has. Who knew it was endemic in the soil. They caught it early, she has received the immunoglobulin treatment, and now they wait for her to start showing signs of recovery. She has a feeding tube. She'll need OT to learn how to swallow again. They won't know how long she'll be in the hospital until she starts showing signs of improvement. Thank you all for the prayers
  21. thank you for the prayers. we should be able to get all our money back. It was Halloween related but getting away with dh is the important thing not what we do. If this gets cancelled we will likely postpone it to Feb when we're going to a Tool concert. That was going to be just an evening out but we can easily turn it into a few nights away. Yes, it is great having family so close and being able to help and support each other when we need it
  22. well dh and I may have to cancel our 2 nights away next week if my niece is still in the hospital. Not happy about that at all but not spending the money will be a plus. Gotta spin it positively somehow.
  23. Oh and you are better than me because I would have 100% left some snotty comment if I saw that. I actually unfriended my mom years ago on facebook because of stupid posts that seemed disconnected from the reality I knew with her. And I have a good relationship with my mom, so much so that we happily invited her and my dad to live with us indefinitely 2 years ago even though they could easily still live in their own home.
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