That pretty much sounds like a win-win to me. Yum.

I agree with you about the ones who are politically pushy. They 100% have every right to hold and express whatever views they want. I just find that it affects my interest in watching them perform. If an actor/actress is going to lecture the public aggressively about their issue du jour or get verbally nasty about people with whom they disagree politically, it's just a turn-off.

Digital meat thermometer. Very handy. Knife sharpener that has a slot for ceramic knives, too. Cookie dough scoop. A time-saver. Rectangular measuring spoons that actually fit the spice jars. GOOD spatulas. (I hate the flimsy kind.)

Good to know. I'm not trying to be argumentative, but surely someone in the office needs to be responsible for making corrections before we leave the office? There's zero value in being handed a visit "summary" that's completely incorrect. I think if it happens again, I'm going to hand it back to them and insist on getting it corrected while I'm there.

Accuracy of records...bah! I took DS to the local children's hospital for a first-time appointment. I handed the appropriate person the forms listing his current meds. The summary I got back had an outdated listed from the pediatrician on it. Why ask me for a list if you're going to ignore it? We haven't been back for a follow-up, so I don't know if they bothered correcting it. (I did correct it a second time via phone a few months ago.) While I can see the benefits of having information available electronically, the risks and potential for abuse/misuse far outweigh them. To deny that is naive at best. Sinister at worst. (In my not-so-humble opinion.)

This. Your kids AND your mom will just have to understand. (I am in the same boat, so I'm speaking from empathy.) If your mom starts trying to guilt you, just explain (though I'm sure you've already done it) that the kids have commitments and couldn't get away right now. Remind her that YOU'RE there. There's nothing worse than going to visit someone and have them complain about (1) how they never see you or (2) the people who aren't there. Maybe that would be a good time to pin her down to a date she can come to you since her schedule may be more flexible. Tell her that with plenty of lead time, you have a better chance of making sure everyone's available. It's hard, I know.

I'm not a fan of the whole nanny state view, and I see a whole lot of things wrong with the proposed idea. Maybe I'm misunderstanding, but your last sentence doesn't make sense to me. Fixing the hearts of mankind begins with the individual. In the meantime, practical issues addressing the welfare of individuals need to be taken. Of course, people try to use "man-made systems" to address problems. The alternative is allowing people to suffer while we're waiting for all those hearts to fix themselves.

You guys are really telling me you have teen who "forgets" to use soap when he showers? I thought I was the only one who had a kid like that! Drives me absolutely BONKERS! You have no idea how relieved I am that this is not some freak parenting fail on my part. (Breathes sigh of relief.)

Yes. And the fact that stores ask for ID from people clearly of legal age says they don't want to run afoul of the law. So, I agree with Sneezyone. Yeah, they should be penalized.

This makes no sense. Are you seriously comparing the owner of the local grocery store legally selling legal (albeit problematic) products produced in a legal way to people who are legally able to purchase them to somebody illegally selling potentially adulterated products that may or not be legal to use (depending on geography) to people who may or may not be legally able to buy them? Sorry. Doesn't wash.

Yeah, that's kind of where I line up. I don't have a great deal of sympathy for drug dealers. (I don't care a whit that it's "only" weed at the moment.) They spread their poison, put their neighborhoods at risk, and ruin lives.

FWIW, Dawn, I think you did the right--and courageous--thing. The idea that a police officer--someone who regularly sees the results of and broken bodies and lives created by drug use/abuse--condoning the selling of drugs (even "just" marijuana) from his own home is disgusting. He shames the profession. I believe his type of LEO is a danger to us all because he gives more fuel to the ever-growing distrust of police and our legal system. So good for you. Even if nothing happens to him yet, with the mom on board maybe his older kid will be able to get on a more productive path, and his younger son may get a safer environment. Good for you.

I get doubly annoyed with charities that do this when I include a letter up-front with my donation saying it is a one-time gift and that I do NOT want to be added to their list. (These are requested charities I donate to in lieu of flowers when someone dies.) I usually follow-up their additional requests with another letter reminding them I already told them I didn't want to be contacted and telling them that, since they failed to honor my request, I will NEVER donate to them again.

That was the first reaction of people I've talked to about it as well. I agree that the DPD should let this investigation be taken over by someone else, for its own sake as much as anyone else's. This is just awful.

I think you really have to read some of the articles to get the full scope of how outrageous and horrifying this situation is. It wasn't her appartment. She burst in on the homeowner who was minding his own business. She yelled to get his hands up and fired. Forensics appear to show that he was NOT advancing on her (and was, in fact, likely sitting or bending down). She saw no gun. Upon noticing the door ajar, she failed to follow her training to retreat and get back up. After shooting him, there does not appear to be evidence she provided first aid (despite having supplies in her backback). I could go on. Her behavior (in my opinion and the jury's) is that her actions go way beyond the level of involuntary homicide. She said in court she intended to kill him. She had options and opportunities to make better decisions at every step of the way. She didn't. And man doing nothing more than living his life in his own home was gunned down.

I'm sure that rabbit trail will find plenty of takers in the politics club.

People bring a lot of personal baggage to these threads. I suspect it's really hard to separate that from what's being asked. And people, I think, feel genuine concern based on their own experience with the topic. But I agree. I often refrain from posting about things I can really use help with because I just don't want to go through being misunderstood because of somebody's else's unrelated experience.

Seriously?

If that had happened, I think you're right. Totally different ballgame. In the real situation, SHE was the intruder.

She also claimed that he was moving toward her and she feared for her life. If that's the case, she had plenty of opportunity to retreat, seek safety, and call for help. We are talking about a police officer (off-duty or not) who is trained to handle these specific situations, not your average citizen. The prosecution said forensic evidence showed the victim was getting up off his sofa or bending down when she shot him. It's unclear if she even attempted to render aid after shooting him. Apparently she had time to text her partner about it (if I read correctly). Everything is so wrong with this whole scenario. She didn't just make one "mistake." She made bad decision after bad decision. Again, she is trained in the use of her weapon and how to handle break-ins and other potentially dangerous encounters. She ignored it all. And an innocent man minding his own business in his own castle was killed. I'm not surprised she was found guilty of murder.

I'm sure that's exactly it, Cat. He wants approval and enthusiasm for the decision, not just acceptance and support. (And by support, I mean active support in that we will do what parents can do in that situation to make sure he is as successful as possible in pursuit of his choice.) However, many posters are saying they don't expect their parents to pretend when they disagree They just want them to keep quiet about their disagreement. In some families, that works fine. In others, it's expected that everyone is everyone else's business. In still others, kids want to be told they're right and aren't satisfied with silent disagreement even if there's active support. In short, there is NO single "correct" way to handle these situations. This whole discussion is highly individual and depends on a bunch of factors.

Hmmm... this is interesting stuff. I have a young adult who is seriously considering a major decision that I strongly feel would be a mistake. What he wants to do is far from illegal or immoral, but it could have a major negative impact on the rest of his life if it goes wrong. In the early days of his considering this decision, we all discussed it. His father and I expressed our concerns in a calm, reasonable way to make sure he was looking at all sides. However, he is young and enamored of this particular path. Ultimately it is his life, his decision. He is the one who will deal with the results of that decision, whether good or bad. (We will, too, but that will be different.) I accept that the decision is out of my control and will support him in it if he chooses to go forward to the extent a parent can. But I have not changed my opinion about the decision. However, he keeps bringing it up in a way that almost solicits discussion. My response--because I do not and cannot as a mother share his enthusiasm for it--is to give a nod of acknowledgement (so he knows I'm listening) and say, "Yes, you've mentioned that." But I won't discuss it further, so I change the subject. So, yeah, I'm not burdening him with my unwanted opinion. But I get the sense that my response is still not satisfactory to him. Sometimes you can't win as a parent no matter what you do.

I'd really appreciate an invite as well. I don't have real-life friends who can offer advice (or a shoulder to lean on) as we travel this wonderful, but sometimes very challenging, road.

Congratulations on the your new life beginning! I hope you and your sister can do something special to celebrate because goodness knows you deserve it. I'm glad you'll be OK despite that ruling on the college costs. It sounds to me like you actually won everything because, unlike your STBXH, you will have enough funds to sustain you plus the love of your girls, family, and friends. Oh, yeah, and you're actually a good human being! He's got...a lot of emptiness and always will. When the weddings, and the grandkids, and the moments that make life worth living come, he'll have nothing. He lost more than he will ever appreciate.

I've been on both sides of that, too, so I totally get what you're saying. I'm dealing with similiar issues with a newly minted young adult, so I guess I'm just feeling a bit of the OP's pain. You want to guide them and be patient, but, dang it, could they just take care of the blasted bill already without it becoming MY problem and one more thing I have to keep track of? (Can you tell I've gotten a bit crabby about it?)