AnniePoo
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Posts posted by AnniePoo
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Thank you all for your kind words. I have no regrets staying home with my kids, but looking forward feels daunting.
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38 minutes ago, madteaparty said:
I have sympathy and not a great solution. Everyone I work with including my bosses are younger than me. I was trying to illustrate a provision and mentioned Lehman recently and the room went quiet. I told the story to my husband who reminded me these people were not in law school yet never mind working when Lehman happened. They had no clue what I was talking about. Every single day I see the exact cost of having mommytracked myself. I mean daily.
On the other hand. I have really good kids and I got to do that the way I wanted. It’s not nothing.
All I can say is, you’re not alone. And most days I can laugh at myself. But some days you cry and that’s that. The thing is, I am at a very prestigious firm now. I did not look for the job, they called me. And every day I put up with it I learn and sort of fit in more. You just have to live with the discomfort and rejection for a bit. I’ve practice being “the other” and while it does take some energy, it gets better. It does.You get it. I’ve dealt with the discomfort all year and it’s hitting me hard today.
I actually have a prestigious bachelor’s degree from a top university but I feel like everyone thinks I’m dumb now. It’s disorienting.
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Sadly, there are no returnships in my area. I’m in a mid-size city and it’s just not large enough for that. My undergrad was perfect for that. I realized that to get back in the field I’d need to go back to school and since I didn’t love my original field, I switched to something else. Feel free to pm me if you want to know exactly what I’m studying. It’s a subset of statistics.
You don’t need to be young to get a position in this field, but, at least around here, the universities to offer this degree didn’t start until recently. So, when I interviewed, my three interviewers were likely late 20’s at the oldest.
really I’m just feeling discouraged and insecure. It’s hard to put yourself out there repeatedly in an uncomfortable situation and it’s just catching up with me tonight. Normally I’m very proud of my life path. Most likely it’ll all work out just fine but right now I’m just feeling sad
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I have been a longtime lurker here from my homeschool days but really need some encouragement. I’ve been a SAHM for almost 16 years (homeschooling for a chunk in there) and started grad school last fall. While I love grad school (the learning portion at least) I am feeling so discouraged as the token old person. I’m 39. Not crazy old. The next older person in my cohort is 27. So it’s me, a 27yo, and a bunch of 22yos. I thought I’d be the cool old lady but nobody seems to want much to do with me.
I need an internship to graduate. I applied to one this year and will apply to many more next year. Just got the rejection. I know job rejections are to be expected but I can’t help but feel ridiculous competing against a bunch of 22yos for these limited spots in a position typically held by young people.
I am just feeling so discouraged and uncomfortable trying to navigate this all as an “old” woman with a huge gap in my resume. There is literally no one I know IRL who can relate to this.
I could really use some commiseration or hope that things might work out favorably for me. I feel like a joke right now and the thought of having to do more internship interviews at my age feels so discouraging. And this isn’t even considering my interviews for entry-level positions in a couple years.
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I’m 39 and starting grad school on Monday. I am SO excited! It’s a great fit for me - something that allows me to work with numbers yet still be a part of a team. I am 100% introvert and think I found my calling.
If you want to, have the energy, and your dh is supportive, I say go for it!
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Many pros can be cons depending on the family. And vice versa. OP, take a look at your personality and see how it meshes with your goals.
Pros: already stated in many posts.
Ability to control what grade level the kids are working at. In our case we have accelerated learners and there's only so much they can do about that in B&M school.
I personally miss the ability to go on vacation when others are in school and to hit up pumpkin patches and whatnot during the week.
Cons:
Lack of exercise. I actually found the exercise bit for the kids much improved by going to B&M school. In the winter, I would have to get them bundled up just to hear whining 8 minutes later. If I wanted the to have good exercise, it usually involved driving to an activity, which becomes a pain quickly. Now they walk to the bus stop, take gym class, have two recesses (outside in the winter and I don't have to keep picking them back outside!), etc. It's a lot less work for me.
Less diversified academics. My kids write quality essays and read books they would have balked at for me. They do it without any hesitation at school.
Stress on mom due to being everything to everyone. I don't hear about any working men having to clean the bathrooms during their coffee break or keep a toddler and a baby quiet while on a conference call.
Younger kids getting ignored and left to fend for themselves while mom is working with the big kids.
Now that my homeschooling days are over (at least for now) I can clearly see how some aspects of homeschooling are clearly unhealthy for the mom. I wish homeschoolers as a whole would stop idealizing everything and be honest. It's not for everyone. If you like it, great! If it doesn't work for you, then send them to school without guilt.
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Keep in mind that she'll be in high school in just a year. Academically, things could be very different. It's a lot easier to accelerate and take more challenging course in high school.
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Beach resort, preferably all-inclusive.
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We have an adult
Rescue and it’s not that hard. She doesn’t eat multiple times a day. We give her greens each day and feed crickets or super worms maybe twice a week. Baths twice a week. Baths are easy and we just put water in a small sterilite bin with certain drops (removes chlorine maybe?). She chills in there for a few minutes (it’s how they hydrate) and sometimes poops.
Proper equipment is a must. Heat lamp plus uv light (Repti-glo 10.0) is critical. Calcium spray for food. Our beardie has metabolic bone disease because the previous owner didn’t use the right lights.
You can leave them at home for about 4 days if you need to, which makes vacationing a lot easier. Just put the lights on a timer.
We have never taken care of a baby though, so I don’t know how much work that would be. They’re so cute that any extra work would be worth it!
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I’d just get her to the dermatologist. You’ll drive yourselves crazy trying to figure this out on your own. (Says fellow celiac sufferer)
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Pamela’s bread mix. Don’t even bother with anything else.
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My experience is that most people are willing to answer, but don't follow up with questions of their own.
This is like 50% of people I meet. I don’t get it. Even the tiniest bit of effort on their part would give me somethjng to work with.
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Screwdriver
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I assume you mean not snow boots? Booties are all the rage now and come in a variety of styles.
http://m.solesociety.com/natasha-dark-mushroom.html
Or
https://m.zappos.com/p/born-trinculo-brown-leather/product/8735710/color/216
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Oh, and if you bring something, put some in a Tupperware for yourself beforehand in case it gets grossly cross contaminated while you’re waiting to get food (like someone drizzling gravy all over the potatoes).
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I always assume I can eat the turkey and nothing else. We usually take along a side, a veggie, and a dessert that are safe and eat those. It makes a complete meal.
If I’m feeling crazy, I’ll eat mashed potatoes, salad, veggies.
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Dead lift. Or trying sticking your butt way out when you squat. It’ll still hit the quads but bring in more butt/hamstring action.
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Altra.
They are the best if both worlds (barefoot and conventional).
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Your post is beautiful. I think the very fact that you are able to share this with your husband and he is supportive of you exploring this says a lot about him. It take a hefty measure of love to support our spouse through changes, when change is challenging and often difficult for everyone.
This exactly.
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Ugh. I hate that. Does she put in effort to keep the conversation going or is it just you?
Try to think back to last time you saw her and follow up on 1-2 things she mentioned. “How’s little Johnny’s soccer team doing this year?†“Is your mother feeling any better?â€
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Download through prime video app.
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Don't skip or change the run. Your preferences are important too.
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I want a masters degree so badly too. I don't even know what I would get it in. I'd just like to be really educated in one area.
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Same thing happened to me. It was like an identity crisis. And I still had 2 at home! I'm done to one who will be in k next year.
I had to make a plan so I wouldn't get depressed. I had gone from feeling like I was responsible for way too much to being chauffeur and cook. Nothing wrong with that, but it was just a huge change.
My plan:
Give myself a whole year off to decompress.
After that:
Volunteer 1 hr per week
Learn a new skill (i OS programming)
I'll figure out what's next in a year. Strangely, now that I have this plan I'm perfectly content to not do anything. 😳
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I think I'll just "retire" after this kid raising thing - (spin off: discouraged about going back to work)
in The Chat Board
Posted
OP on the other thread here. I think what you’re proposing sounds fantastic, and that is what I had planned to do with my life too. I love the idea of more people having enough margin in their lives to serve those around them and keep stress levels down.
Once my kids were all in school, I found myself getting bored and depressed. I tried volunteering at various institutions but the positions I found most meaningful required skills I didn’t have. My personality and gifts are such that I like working behind the scenes solving problems.
For me, grad school was actually plan B after finding that I need more structure and mental challenge than I was getting staying at home and volunteering. I will absolutely grieve a loss of freedom when it comes time to work full time, but after weighing it against how aimless I felt before I started school, I do believe it will be the better option.
I honestly see no cons to what you are proposing.