Thank you for the link, Janet. I printed a few of his other articles, too, but haven't read them yet. If you'd be willing to share any of the details about your first paragraph, either here or by PM, I'd appreciate it. Knox is indeed on the list. I can't say I have specific questions at the moment, but would you mind sharing some of your impressions, either here or by PM?

:grouphug: It's February. Can you afford to take a couple of light/fun/break weeks? Maybe with a few extra doses of time to yourself? Get back to school with the boy in March, give it a month, and see if your feelings are the same or different.

I know we have some posters here with kids who attended one of the CTCL schools, but I'm hoping there are more that I'm not aware of, and of course would like to hear anyone's thoughts. I'm wondering what your/your child's perceptions & experiences were. What was special about the school? If your child applied to more than one CTCL school, did all of the schools accept? What great/unusual/challenging/etc. opportunities did your child take advantage of? What did your child do (or plan to do) after graduation, and did that college make a difference in your child getting to that next step? Would you/your child say the "change lives" bit is accurate? DS15 and I will soon be visiting our third CTCL. I think almost all of them sound terrific, but I also know that a lot depends on the student. The college can offer everything under the sun but if the kid isn't interested or won't take the necessary steps for whatever reason, that isn't necessarily the college's "fault" - but then again, maybe that's what the "change lives" part is all about - making that extra effort to reach waaaayyyy out to the kids who don't jump in with both feet? I don't know. I think I'm just looking for BTDT, good & bad. The stuff you can't get from brochures and group tours. (And, if I'm honest, looking for some sign that one of these would be Just Right for my kid!)

Probably a dumb idea but ... Maybe you could try calling the Fin Aid depts. at UCs that he hasn't applied to and see if you get consistent responses? That way you can assess whether the info they give is varied enough to warrant calling the ones specifically in question.

I would LOVE this!

I know,* but it's still a Very Big Deal in my book. * I don't want to sound stalkerish, but I do pay attention to your posts and have enjoyed reading your students' journeys!

Ah, this info makes it seem MUCH more feasible to me. How wonderful that your younger one is also your easier one! :)

OMG, you win MAJOR Best Parent points for that! No way would I even consider it after being at work and on the road for so much of the day already!

I should add that I am still away from home at least 40 hours/week, and that 8th grade was particularly difficult for that and other reasons (it was our first year homeschooling, and we had some attitude/adolescence difficulties). So if you go for it next year I'd keep a close eye on the then-7th-grader in particular - self-motivation and accountability can be hard to foster from a distance. Also, I think you may need to play around in your head with possible compromises. I do not feel like we are making a stellar education for DS, but I do think it's pretty good, and that's a trade-off I had/have to grapple with from time to time. Some things you may be able to sort out after some thinking time, but others will have to wait until you see how it's going and then adjust as necessary.

I homeschool one son and work 5 days a week (1 long day and 4 shorter ones). DS and I work together from 7:30-10:30 on the shorter days. For the rest of the time, he works independently until the work is finished. Sometimes we need to put in time on the weekends to make it all work. If we do a lab science at home next year, we will definitely be working weekends. His social stuff happens on weekends. That was the case even when he was in public school, because DH and I were both away from home 50+ hours during the week. DS had to be in after-school care, which by itself wiped out most extracurricular opportunities; the few that were workable either had to happen just down the hall or I had to impose on another parent to do pick-up/drop-off every time - which was hard for me to ask of anyone. So DS at least understands that his opportunities are very limited no matter what the school situation is. I am hopeful that once he gets his drivers license his world will open up a bit. I'm sorry to hear you don't like your job, but it sounds like the schedule is pretty good as far as leaving you lots of time for the schoolwork. But I think you may all need to adjust your expectations as far as extracurriculars & such go. If there are opportunities that are within walking/biking distance, I'd focus on those, and let the rest fall away. It definitely is not easy, and in my head I whine a lot. :leaving: But it can be done, and done reasonably well, IMHO, if everyone understands and accepts the limitations.

In that case, you may find valuable ideas in this thread from the high school board: http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/topic/624206-im-18-and-i-never-attended-school/

Totally OT, but I have learned that "good school district" is highly subjective, and it was only when looking at how "good" school was for my particular student that I decided homeschooling was the way to go for us.

I'm so sorry for your loss, Yael. I wish i could be in NC with you today. :grouphug:

This story made me think of the various times I've bought a used book only to find someone's photo, a letter, whatever, stuffed inside or serving as a bookmark. A passport and military papers would be pretty poor choices for a bookmark, though! And then it reminded me of this story: After my mom died I found a photo album - WWII Hawaii, including some rather gruesome photos as well as the mundane. No military member of my family ever served in HI; in fact, I'm pretty sure my mom is the only person in all of my family to have even visited the state. My guess? Mom bought it at a garage sale while in HI on vacation. Cheap souvenir, and great for the history buff she was!

:grouphug: Age 13 was the worst. Just really, really hard. And, for us, it was our first year homeschooling! Fifteen is soooo much better.... Not easy street every day, but really a lot better! Hang in there, and keep your emotional armor handy.

Ah, I think I see now. So it seems to be a visual reminder for yourself that you are dealing with a capital-P "Person" and should try to be kind, understanding, etc.?

Agreeing with the others. IME, when people say "soul" they usually mean "personality" or something like that, even though they think they're talking about something else. If you want to avoid judging based on appearance, maybe try getting most of your news from the radio. It works for me, anyway.

I always tip on the full amount and round up, figuring that servers, deliverers, bartenders and such don't usually get health insurance, paid vacation, etc.

I am so sorry for your loss. Little Nathaniel lived a big life in his short time here, because of you and your family.

Heaven! Can I go the week after you?

First - thanks to those who explained what a "plain background" is. I love it when the Hive teaches me something! :) As for the OP. What would I do? I'm not sure ... but what I would *want* to do is ask SIL when she thinks would be a good month for my kids to visit so they can learn and do all those things, too! I don't know if this is possible with whatever kind of phone you have (I don't have a PhancyPhone), but I'd look into turning off the photos in a way that lets you still have the texts. Or only check the group text every 2 or 3 days or only when I'm feeling good about myself/my life or whatever. I'm sorry it makes you feel bad, Birchbark. :grouphug: I know the feeling. But it does sound like SIL has no malice whatsoever, so I'd try to keep that in mind and, as another poster said, focus on gratitude for what you DO have - and recognize that there are plenty of people who would envy you, too. Heck, just being able to live on one income to allow for full-time homeschooling makes ME envious! DH and I both have to trundle off to work 5 days a week and leave DS to work on his own all afternoon.

I too find him overly harsh and disorganized at times, although he does also give praise on occasion. His worksheets often have typos or other errors, too, which is confusing, especially for beginning students. I think the homework is overwhelming - often more than 4 hours on the website alone, to say nothing of the compositions and the dozens of translations each week, plus all the memorization Leven expects - and at times I really resent how much time it sucks away from the rest of our studies. But I am hesitant to change for next year because, among other things, DC needs more experience working hard at something that doesn't come easily, and if we stick with Leven long enough he might be willing to write a college rec based on DC's growth over time. (It felt totally lame to write that last bit, but it's true that we have few other options for outside recs!)

Standing up works best for me. It's just a quick little push-twist-pop and that's it.

Great plans! I would definitely look into having someone else host the second monthly teen group, and look into carpooling for handbells. As for your youngest - is he as extreme with his siblings/father as he is with you? I'm thinking maybe the 15 y.o. might get more cooperation with less drama. I wouldn't want to start sibling resentment, but if he looks up to her or she can leverage something like "clean the toilet really well and I'll play one game of chess with you" or whatever, it might buy you just a smidgen of peace. At least it's worth trying once in a while, maybe.... I also liked the suggestion upthread of telling the kids that if they want to see their friends on Mondays they'd better help with good work so everyone has time & energy for it.

I haven't finished reading the whole thread yet, but Quill, thank you SO MUCH for the bolded! DS and I are the same as you and your youngest, and the social stuff is hands-down the absolute worst for me. I feel so guilty ... but even that isn't very motivating. ;) I have definitely told him it'll get good when he's in college!