This is great! Thanks for indulging us! I cannot get over the jelly beans. Hilarious. I don't even know if I could get jelly beans right now! I'd have to find a jelly belly display.

We do, but all in the same state. We are now trying to stay a reasonable distance from ill parents though, so I think we'll stay within about 2 hours from them for now.

Thank you! I can garentee if I were veiling, it'd be the same three pieces over and over and over again and probably all neutral. As it is, I wear the same two Tilley hats day in and out.

Actually, I was just going to ask something like that. I grew up in a Chicago suburb area with a decent sized Muslim population. In K-8 in the 1980s, a lot of the kids in my class had older sisters and moms that were wearing just the hijab in mostly darker colors. In high school, I think most of the super-devout kids started going to Aqsa (private Muslim school) when it opened. My high school still had a big Muslim population and it was mixed, but mostly the same more neutral colored hijab if anyone even wore it. I moved around the state for a while and have recently moved back. Some things I've noticed are that I am seeing way more women wearing a niqab. I noticed that there was a woman completely covered and with a niqab in the WIC office yesterday, and her husband wasn't letting her talk to the WIC desk nor talk to anyone in the waiting room. I thought that was a little weird, especially for a WIC office. The other thing I noticed is that more teen and twenty-something women were wearing some pretty funky looking hijab, inlcuding sports teams (bears and cubs mostly) tie dye, pink and things I never saw as I kid. Is some of this just a cultural change for the area? Teen rebellion? I have to admit I was kind of surprised seeing the Chicago Bears hijab! Is it just people feeling more comfortable? There's a good sized Muslim population mixed in with everything else around there. I was wondering if maybe we were seeing more traditional newer immigrants from more conservative countries clashing with 4th and 5th genreational Americans wanting to blend their traditional cultures with things popular for their age group.

I am in the middle of this right now. It's actually been a good thing for me, I think, because it's forcing me to examine what and why I believe what I do. It also helps me understand my DH, who I'd probably classify as agnostic right now (capital A or not on that?) I think it's okay to always be evolving and changing and thinking on these things. It gives perspective, especially if the history is written by someone other than the dead white male victors, so to speak.

bumping this to give it one more chance.

Whether we decide to go for one more child or not in a few years, I still would like to find help in processing my second c-section. People have told me to look into ICAN. Do they have references for therapy? Is it a group I would attend like LLL is for bf-ing? Would they be a good group to connect with if you are going to look for a Vba2c friendly provider or one that will kindly work with you for a third c-section and be honest about your health? We are a non-hormonal BC family and I'd call myself currently non-practicing Catholic. I would love someone who didn't make a snap judgement because of my age, previous early miscarriages, or number of children. I can make peace with ending my childbearing years if a good provider really is concerned, however. I am struggling with this as I will be 37 this year. I have given birth easily vaginally, and had my first c-section a few years ago. My last provider (too far away now) was wonderful in encouraging and even inducing a vbac. However, I had a massive anxiety attack midway, made them stop inducing me, and begged him for an elective c-section. I had trouble during that c-section and had to be held in observation without my baby for several days afterward to watch for heart damage and a possible stroke (both were precautionary). I am angry with myself every day for this and dealt with that by eating a lot of junk. :crying: It's hard to forgive yourself when you've sabotaged yourself. He told me afterward I should stop having kids because my hands were full -without addressing my health. Up until that second c section, I had a terrific, easy pregnancy other than the GD I always seem to get. So obviously, I want to give myself time to heal and become healthy either way. Is ICAN the place to look, or does anyone have advice on the best approach? I know it's not healthy to beat myself up every day about stopping the VBAC induction. Usually people can blame someone else, but I am the moron this time.

I am overwhelmed. My kids are some of the only children on DH's side and were the only children until recently on my side. We are both the oldest and have brothers and sisters that enjoy buying toys for the kids, even when we try to redirect toward things like books or adopting an animal at the zoo. (And honestly, how do you tell a 15 year old uncle that we think it might be more fun for little Checkov to get a book for his birthday than the awesome Captain America shield that you know darn well Uncle-15-yr-old wants to play with too. ) How do you decide what to keep, what to store to rotate? We have some storage, not much. We move about every two to three years, so it all moves with us too. For example, say I have a great quality wood toy from a place like Lakeshore learning store, and the older kids still sort of play with but leave everywhere. You want to keep it for the younger kids though when they are older. Normally, I would clean it off when the older kids are growing out if it somewhat, and I would store it for a few years. HOWEVER- what do you do when you have 20-30 such toys? I know this is ridiculous, but I used to have that gigantic mega block castle when I just had two kids. We decided to donate it when they were older. Now I'm kicking myself that I donated that because the kids that are preschoolers and toddlers now would love that thing. Any tips on making this decision? Kids ages are in my siggie, and we will likely try for one more in about two years.

I struggle with this. I came from a smaller family where there weren't many kids and frankly, we were spoiled. My DH on the other hand came from a large family with the same dynamics you've described- only, he ended up not being a favorite of everyone. He recalls Christmases with a ton of people running around and chaos without receiving one gift and birthdays that only his parents remembered while other siblings had family stopping by. He remembers his grandma and grandpa taking his younger siblings on a vacation but not him because he 'should stay back and help his parents.' As a result, he ended up working most his family holidays as a late teen and now as an adult, is on a very superficial relationship with most his family other than a few siblings and his father. Right now, we see the same thing happening with our younger kids on that same side of the family and we've been trying to block it. I agree with teaching kids that sometimes things aren't fair, but I like to leave that for things like birthday invites for one kid or opportunities related to scouting that one might have. But I might be jaded because the child often left out of things is my child with Aspergers, so it comes off as the grandparents not wanting to relate to their child that isn't neurotypical.

I am supposed to go to a mother's day tea tomorrow too. We already had "muffins for mom" early this week. I am not particularly excited about the tea, but my first grader won't stop talking about it.

aaaaaaand the point of my post was to thank OT for working to get the forums up again. I didn't mean to leave that out! I have been following along on the facebook page and saw all the work. I really appreciate it!

My son thought it was a DDoS attack on homeschooling sites due to the German homeschooler wanting asylum situation. A lot of his friends and a lot of people at the nearby college are really upset about the politics regarding it. And I won't go into detail as to avoid political discussion here, but I thought it might be a valid suggestion. TWTM is fairly visible even if we don't talk much about that sort of thing here.

OMG. That is excellent.

hahahaha! Actually, the thing I like right now is where they are putting in the screaming goats into lyrics of the songs, like Taylor Swift's Trouble when You Walked In that I don't know how to link and can't look up because my 8 month old is yanking my hair right now and hitting me with a keyring

At this point, as long as it doesn't have the lyrics, "I just met you, and this is crazy..." don't care. Some people want to do that, some people want to film themselves doing a 5 part harmony of Nintendo songs.

I like the !!!!!!11!!!eleventy!!1!!!!! ones better. That's old skool meme though circa early 2000s livejournal.

ROTFL. I *just* got off the phone with my aunt and she eluded to the same thing. How funny! She is very devout, attended Catholic schools, attended Loyola University in Chicago, is very active in her parish and helped a guy with writing a book about the time of the French in Illinois years ago, which obviously brought quite a few Jesuits to our area in the earlier days. Heh, I knew my family would be geeking out.

wow. wasn't expecting a Jesuit. I am intrigued as I come from a family background and an area that is big on Jesuits.

Hmm, I have more information now. I am not very familiar with this local parish since we have recently moved here and I haven't been to Catholic Mass in years other than a few visits in our last town. My children have been once or twice along with attending church at other religions. My husband is not interested in anything at this time but doesn't care if I choose to re-explore. I just found out our local parish is so hands off right now because the priest is fighting cancer. They are overwhelmed at this time and that would explain why the rectory was short with my questions and why they are shorthanded. I have decided I will see if they have a women's guild. My mother did that when I was growing up. I'll also poke around at other parishes in nearby towns. There's about one per town, but one town has a university and has a Newman Center which holds Mass. That actually confuses me- is that more like Mass geared toward college age? Every parish I've looked up has an English, Spanish, and Latin Mass. Very interesting!

How do you ask for something like this? At the last parish we were near when I was considering coming back to church, I asked the rectory for something like this. I also asked if I could talk to him about my questions. They were very dismissive, told me the priest there only heard confession during the scheduled times and was very busy to be speaking to people individually. I was a bit shocked, honestly, because I read stories of people actually seeing Fr. Insertnamehere around town or talking about having him stop for dinner or visiting with him. Is this a smaller town thing? The priests were nearly inaccessible growing up too, though not as much I encountered the last time. I don't know if I am articulating that sufficiently. I was surprised to see that in some of my friend's religions, they could talk to their pastors/elders or ask them questions or have them stop by and give a blessing to your home or have a church gathering where you might discuss some religious things and some frivolous things like cake :laugh: . That seemed so foreign to me. I went to CCD, the parish pastor might stop by, you could shake his hand after mass, you could go to confession on Sunday, but otherwise, there was a very fine line where you had to know your place and not really interact. Now one of my parents grew up in Chicago and attended Catholic grammar and High Schools there, and his memories are completely different. He has those memories of hanging out with the priests, working on cars together in shop class, had them as teachers etc. I am confused if this is a generational thing or an area thing or a personality thing or phases the Dioceses in my two areas I live in frequently are going though where they have this cold, detached, distant preference over a warm, friendly accommodating atmosphere. I have decreed 2013 my year for relearning about my childhood Catholicism since I am apparently clueless about it as a CCD Cradle Catholic Creaster. I use Behold and See from CHC with my kids for afterschooling since it spoke to me (I thought it was a sign that I should take a look at my childhood religion :leaving:) and there are things in there I never learned in years of CCD. I was also part of the choir in high school. I miss that a bit too! Wow, this is so confusing. Thank you for letting me unload all these thoughts here. I haven't read the thread yet as I am keeping off the internet most of the day for lent and focusing on my family. My overreaching goal of the year finding where I fit and I thought this was internet worthy. (I also have a huge struggle because I support gay marriage and IVF with all embryo saving, but I am strongly against abortion in nearly every form and identify with many aspects of Catholicism. I am a pain in the bottom, I think.)

I don't understand what goes though people's minds. We've rented for years, and I would feel terrible just treating a home like it's disposable. Even if it's not mine, I can still be respectful, you know what I mean? I hope you can get them out without a lot of damage.

This is great! I will have to come back though when I have some prices.

I am bumping this since I am in a zone where I will be ordering soon. Any recent experiences and recommendations? I am probably going to be container gardening this year since I don't know if we'll be staying in this rental after September.

I grew up half the time in Chicago and half in Rockford and both with tiny yards. I know exactly what you are talking about when you mean city-wise yard space. I'd say go with the better house in the neighborhood that makes you happy and make your small space work for you. Do you mind if I ask what city you are in? You can shoot me a PM if you'd rather. One thing I have noticed from moving around this general area so much is that people that have grown up in small towns or suburbs don't really get the neighborhood idea of bigger cities. That's not a slam on it- my DH is like that- but there's just a completely different vibe to living in a big city and a big yard is not necessary. If your DH's commute would be killer to get to a safe suburb, than I don't know if I'd go for that. I have a lot of friends that do, don't get me wrong, but it wouldn't be for me. My old job was about 40 miles down the tollway from a place we were renting a few years ago, but the traffic was ridiculous. That wouldn't have lasted long at all for me if I had stayed at that job.

My neighbors are a lovely longtime homeschooling family and one of them told me they homeschool "so mommy can sleep in and stay in her pajamas all day." Now obviously, I know the family and the mom and know that's not reality, but it was hilarious to see her say that.