This is less about parenting a child through a phase and more about getting help for what sounds like Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or another anxiety disorder. One friend who's child truly did have PTSD after a very severe stomach issue has had excellent success with Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy http://www.emdr.com/ Sounds like serious mumbo jumbo but it's the gold standard in treating PTSD and some anxiety/phobia issues. It's also very easy and is not 'counseling'. Traditional talk counseling actually can make anxiety and PTSD worse. Having dealt with my own very huge - no, seriously.....massive and debilitating - anxiety issues, I feel for you guys. {{{{hugs}}}} Katherine

Yes. Find a doc that will support you in slowly reducing to see what your (new) normal levels are. K

I mostly ignore. About once a year though, I respond - to my dad - and point out the inaccuracy of the information. K

Sounds like you are deficient in zinc, vitamin d, potassium and magnesium. The zinc and D could be lower because of the cancer and treatment. It's late and I can't do a long post, but various components of the tx could absolutely impact your levels. How much D3 are you taking right now? Any other supplements? Best, Katherine

I have been lucky and persistent enough to treat anxiety and depression 100% with orthomolecular medicine - ie vitamins, minerals, amino acids, essential fatty acids specifically. (not herbs, homeopathy etc) https://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AV3S7fNjwg33ZHp0bWN3cV8xNzVndzR3cWpmOA&hl=en Everything I do is in that google doc. To start: 1000 IU per 25 lbs body weight some great fish oil - 1g "regular' fish oil per 10 lbs body weight is a good place to start but if you can take two different kinds, one very high in DHA so that you can get approximately equal parts DHA/EPA it's slightly more physiologically appropriate. The above document has all of my purchasing links. Best to you:) K

Four in our family; four have ADHD. K

The Neutrogena Sensitive Skin is an all-physical formulation. It burned not b/c of the actives but b/c of the inactives on your barrier disrupted skin. Try moisturizing very very well for a few days, increasing dietary zinc and antioxidants, then try the s/s again *over* moisturizer. Over time, retinoids actually improved my barrier function over all, though at any given time, over application of them can leave me with some burning when other topicals are applied - chemical or no. The LRP US s/s actually are decent....L'oreal has a version as well (they're both owned by the Cosmair umbrella). My personal favorites though - dry to normal skin, loves emollient, moisturizing, even shiny stuff;p: Bioderma Anti-Age (ebay) mixed with a drop of the Bioderma tinted cream Bioderma Max Lait (ebay) mixed with a drop of the Bioderma tinted cream Avene cream 50+ mixed with a drop fot he bioderma tinted cream You see a pattern here:) They're all a little whitening (the anti-age is the least) so the drop of tint takes away that white cast. The anti-age is 30 spf/30 ppd (ppd is a measure of UVA protection, spf only measures UVB) and is very light and ung-dly expensive;/ So I use the Max Lait or Avene whenever I can tolerate it. Many who like very light 'matte' sunscreens are loving the Bioderma AKN Mat 40. Best, Katherine

*Phenominal* information at that site. Very interesting about the optimal pH being 8 - ito minimizing irritation. K

2nd the rubbing alcohol or everclear I use alcohol and microfiber cloths on surfaces that need serious cleaning/disinfection h2o2 if mold/mildew pops up (just spray it on and let it air dry) water and microfiber cloths for cleaning glass and chrome.... that's pretty much it. :) K

And don't underestimate what dietary potassium can do for your blood pressure (produce, produce, produce) Here is some more good info on increasing potassium intake: http://www.krispin.com/potassm.html More Vitamin D and blood pressure information with cites to the medical literature: http://www.vitamindcouncil.org/researchHypertension.shtml Vitamin D, blood pressure, protecting the kidneys: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19687790 "The antihypertensive properties of vitamin D include renoprotective effects....snip.....In general, the antihypertensive effects of vitamin D seem to be particularly prominent in vitamin-D-deficient patients with elevated blood pressure. Thus, in view of the relatively safe and inexpensive way in which vitamin D can be supplemented, we believe that vitamin D supplementation should be prescribed to patients with hypertension and 25-hydroxyvitamin D levels below target values." Nutritiondata.com is fun to play around with. Dash Diet...generally speaking, this the evidence based standard in lowering bp through diet. It recommends 8.5 svgs produce per day though for a number of reasons, there is sufficient evidence to support intakes higher than that (ie the 10-15 svgs). http://www.healthcastle.com/potassium-high-blood-pressure.shtml I'd be worth getting some magnesium asap. Abbey's suggestion for epsom salt baths is good. Oral supplemental magnesium would be helpful as well. 1000 mg per day of a tolerated form woulnd't be too much. Best, Katherine

Not too late....still *really* important to optimize your D...and your kids D levels. A recent study indicated that optimal levels of serum D may reduce breast cancer by 80%. Women deficient in vitamin D are 94% more likely to see their breast cancer spread and 73% more likely to die from cancer. 40% reduction in bladder cancer by keeping levels between 40 and 60 ng/mL93% of patients with musculoskeletal pain are vitamin D deficient vitamin D deficiency is predictive of pelvic floor disorders..... seasonal affective disorder is likely nothing more than vitamin D deficiency optimal vitamin D levels seems to be preventative against autoimmune disorders vitamin D has a treatment effect in MS, influenza and other disorders and multiple illnesses seems to have both a preventative and treatment effect in asthma reduces falls and morbidity from falls in the elderly... It's not too late. Start now. Start your kids now:) K

2nd. There are active outbreaks in many places in the US. Vaccine and natural pertussis protection wane more quickly than was previously thought. Older kids and adults can get it 5-10 years after their last pertussis booster, then spread it to babies who are at a great deal of risk for serious complications. Often the adults or older kids don't know it's pertussis as it sometimes just presents as a 'bad cough'. My 10 yo (now 11) had it last summer and it was, quite frankly, terrifying. K

Here's a doc I wrote up for a pregnant friend - she keeps kosher which is why the supplement links are kosher.... For future reference, it can be found here: https://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AV3S7fNjwg33ZHp0bWN3cV8xNDhoczVmbTJnOA&hl=en Nutrition during Pregnancy and Breastfeeding general info • what/where to buy when to take what • reminders: tips/tricks milk supply as it relates to menstrual cycle General Info for pregnancy and breastfeeding nutrition in order of importance It's absolutely better to get nutrients from our food than it is to get nutrients from supplements. But in 10 years of analyzing diets, I haven't found anyone getting all that they need from food. •vitamin d3 5,000 IU per day better yet, 1,000 IU per 25 lbs body weight. if levels are less than 55ng/mL take 3,000 IU/25 lbs body weight for a month then drop back down to 1,000 IU per 25 lbs body weight ideally, have your hcp test 25(OH)D levels using LabCorp or ZRT if using Quest, divide the result by 1.3 (more at vitamindcouncil.org) vitamin d and gestational diabates, cesarean rates, pre-eclampsia, bacterial vaginitis •zinc 30-50 mg zinc suppplementation per day from all supplemental sources •magnesium 500-1000 mg per day from food and supps eat 1/2-1c beans per day (black, kidney, garbanzo, etc) eat 1oz raw/lightly toasted nuts every day (pistachio, almond, pecan, walnut, sunflower, pine, hazelnut) •Omega 3 from fish oil ideally 1g DHA per day (and 500mg-1g EPA) while pregnant and nursing no flax, borage or evening primrose till the last 5 weeks •calcium 1000-1200 mg per day from food and supps • get what you can from food supplement the rest • 1 cup any milk/milk sub (300ish mg calcium) • 6-8 oz yogurt (400ish mg calcium) • 1 oz hard cheese (200ish mg calcium) •multi Nutri-Supreme Research Prenatal best prenatal multi I've found yet... optimal formulation best iron, best zinc, best forms of B vitamins. •iron iron bisglycinate - safest, best absorbed/ assimilated form avoid ferrous forms (in most prenatals and regular vites) Purchasing Information: Vitamin D-3 • drops - just olive oil and D3 (Nature's Answer-olive oil, kosher pareve) with food • avoid dry tablets and powder based capsules • easy to take • my 40 lb child takes a drop each weekday (M thru F) • my 75 lb child takes 9 drops a week - usually one a day with an extra M and F • I take 3 drops per day with breakfast Zinc • Blue Bonnet Chelated Zinc • one per day in the middle of a normal/large meal • if it causes stomach upset, take half: open capsule, empty half out, then take. Getting it in (see, I knew you could do it!!) include 2 eggs each day 4-6 oz animal protein 3 servings dairy (or calcium supplements + 3 oz additional high quality protein) 10 or more servings produce 1/2-1 c (or more) legumes 1-2 oz raw nuts and/or seeds (do not rely on peanuts nor any one particular nut/see carbs ideally from legumes, non-starchy veggies, winter squash, sweet potato, quinoia, less reliance on potato and grains breakfast 3-5 supps 1+c nonstarchy veg, 1/2 c fruit, 3 oz protein, more nonstarchy or starchy veg or grain multi • vitamin d (1000iu per 25lbs) • magnesium (200ish mg ) calcium citrate or calcium containing food (250-300 mg) fish oil or fatty fish (wild salmon, sardines, tuna, anchovy...use little to no farmed salmon) snack no supps 1+c nonstarchy veg, nuts, small amount carb lunch 1 or 2 supps 1+c nonstarchy veg, 1/2 c fruit, 3 oz protein, more nonstarchy or starchy veg or grain magnesium (200ish mg) • calcium citrate or calcium containing food (250-300 mg) snack no supps 1+c nonstarchy veg, nuts, small amount carb dinner 2-4 supps 1+c nonstarchy veg, 1/2 c fruit, 3 oz protein, more nonstarchy or starchy veg or grain magnesium (200ish mg) • calcium citrate or calcium containing food zinc (stick the zinc with whatever meal is your largest) fish oil or fatty fish (wild salmon, sardines, tuna, anchovy...use little to no farmed salmon) bedtime 0-1 supps calcium supplement if you need it to get to 1000 mg for the day ...... snipped the rest to shorten the post....the full doc can be found at the link above.

Without writing a tome, I'll just mention three things: vitamin d3 magnesium potassium It shouldn't be too difficult to get it under control but it IS a top priority. Nutrition is critical (including sufficient D) and nutritional issues are virtually always the cause of high blood pressure, pregnancy induced high blood pressure and pre-eclampsia. http://www.vitamindcouncil.org/newsletter/pregnancy-and-gestational-vitamin-d-deficiency.shtml "Preeclampsia J Clin Endocrinol Metab. 2007 Sep;92(9):3517-22. Epub 2007 May 29. Maternal vitamin D deficiency increases the risk of preeclampsia. Bodnar LM, Catov JM, Simhan HN, Holick MF, Powers RW, Roberts JM. Preeclampsia is a common obstetrical condition in which hypertension is combined with excess protein in the urine. It greatly increases the risk of the mother developing eclampsia and then dying from a stroke. Dr. Lisa Bodnar and her colleagues found women with 25(OH)D levels less than 15 ng/mL had a five-fold (5 fold) increase in the risk of preeclampsia. and from the same link, this: "the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recently recommended that all pregnant women have a 25(OH)D blood test because Vitamin D is important for normal fetal development (p. 1145): "Given the growing evidence that adequate maternal vitamin D status is essential during pregnancy, not only for maternal well-being but also for fetal development, health care professionals who provide obstetric care should consider assessing maternal vitamin D status by measuring the 25-OH-D concentrations of pregnant women. On an individual basis, a mother should be supplemented with adequate amounts of vitamin D3 to ensure that her 25-OH-D levels are in a sufficient range (>32 ng/mL). The knowledge that prenatal vitamins containing 400 IU of vitamin D3 have little effect on circulating maternal 25-OH-D concentrations, especially during the winter months, should be imparted to all health care professionals."" That statement was published in Pediatrics. 2008 Nov;122(5):1142-52. Wagner CL, Greer FR; American Academy of Pediatrics Section on Breastfeeding; American Academy of Pediatrics Committee on Nutrition. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/18977996 This highlights the truly extraordinary role of vitamin D in healthy pregnancy: http://www.vitamindcouncil.org/newsletter/more-vitamin-d-studies-of-interest.shtml " Professor Bruce Hollis presented findings from his and Carol Wagner's five million dollar Thrasher Research Fund and NIH sponsored randomized controlled trials of about 500 pregnant women. Bruce and Carol's discoveries are vital for every pregnant woman. Their studies had three arms: 400, 2,000, and 4,000 IU/day. 4,000 IU/day during pregnancy was safe (not a single adverse event) but only resulted in a mean Vitamin D blood level of 27 ng/mL in the newborn infants, indicating to me that 4,000 IU per day during pregnancy is not enough. During pregnancy, 25(OH)D (Vitamin D) levels had a direct influence on activated Vitamin D levels in the mother's blood, with a minimum Vitamin D level of 40 ng/mL needed for mothers to obtain maximum activated vitamin D levels. (As most pregnant women have Vitamin D levels less than 40 ng/mL, this implies most pregnant women suffer from chronic substrate starvation and cannot make as much activated Vitamin D as their placenta want to make.) Complications of pregnancy, such as preterm labor, preterm birth, and infection were lowest in women taking 4,000 IU/day, Women taking 2,000 IU per day had more infections than women taking 4,000 IU/day. Women taking 400 IU/day, as exists in prenatal vitamins, had double the pregnancy complications of the women taking 4,000 IU/day. What does this huge randomized controlled trial mean? We have long known that blood levels of activated Vitamin D usually rise during very early pregnancy, and some of it crosses the placenta to bathe the fetus, especially the developing fetal brain, in activated vitamin D, before the fetus can make its own. However, we have never known why some pregnant women have much higher activated Vitamin D levels than other women. Now we know; many, in fact most, pregnant women just don't have enough substrate, the 25(OH)D building block, to make all the activated Vitamin D that their placenta wants to make. Of course fetal tissues, at some time in their development, acquire the ability to make and regulate their own activated Vitamin D. However, mom's activated Vitamin D goes up very quickly after conception and supplies it to baby, during that critical window when fetal development is occurring but the baby has yet to acquire the metabolic machinery needed to make its own activated Vitamin D. The other possibility, that this is too much activated Vitamin D for pregnancy, cannot stand careful scrutiny. First, the amount of activated vitamin D made during pregnancy does not rise after the mother's 25(OH)D reaches a mean of 40 ng/mL, so the metabolism is controlled. Second, levels above 40 ng/mL are natural, routinely obtained by mothers only a few short decades ago, such as President Barack Obama's mom probably did, before the sun scare. (President Obama was born in Hawaii in late August before the sun-scare to a mother with little melanin in her skin) Third, higher blood levels of Vitamin D during pregnancy reduce risk of infection and other pregnancy complications, the opposite may be expected if 25(OH)D levels above 40 ng/mL constituted harm. It is heartening to see the Thrasher Research Fund and NIH support such a large randomized controlled trial. In fact the Thrasher Research Fund has already funded a three year follow up and the NIH request for a follow up grant is pending. Nevertheless, a large number of medical scientists keep saying, "We need even more science before recommending Vitamin D." What are they really saying? First they said we need randomized controlled trials (RCT) before we do anything. Well here is a big one. Then they say, as they did in Brugge, "We don't believe this RCT, we need more money for more RCTs." If you think about it, they are saying pregnant women should remain Vitamin D deficient until scientists get all the money for all the RCTs they want, which may take another ten years. How many children will be forever damaged in that ten years?" End quoted material Best, Katherine

I'd bet the farm that the parents are signing on to not only the academic mission of the school but the nutritional one as well. They don't have to send their kids to this particular school if they don't agree with the rules. As abbeyej pointed out, it is a choice. Other options do exist. Personally, I think it sounds very reasonable, after all, we're talking one meal a day. There are plenty of choices and options for breakfast, dinner and weekends that bring other foods on board. I'd love it if my kids school had a no junk, no sugar, no white flour options. K

I'd bet the farm that the parents are signing on to not only the academic mission of the school but the nutritional one as well. They don't have to send their kids there, other options do exist. Personally, I think it sounds very reasonable, after all, we're talking one meal a day. There are plenty of choices and options for breakfast, dinner and weekends that bring other options on board. I'd love it if my kids school had a no junk, no sugar, no white flour options. K

OMG. So glad you're okay. My friend's house sitter was cooking bacon and the same thing happened - except when she turned around to see the flames, they'd already engulfed the whole wall. You're a great writer. What fun it was to read! Living it, I'm sure, was another story entirely. Glad you were able to keep - or at least regain - your sense of humor. Best, Katherine

It would be very very difficult to pick up Hep B as a visitor in the hospital. K

google 'magnesium headaches' Magnesium insufficiency is common and can cause muscle tension that can cause headaches. Migraines also often have a magnesium deficiency component - and bringing levels up reduces duration and frequency - or even eliminates them for some. I too had a headache everday last week - intractable - didn't respond to any meds, massage or chiropractic. Then I realized I was off my Mg and eating too much chocolate (which has mag but not enough and is a headache trigger for me in high doses). Better now with no tx, just 500 mg Mg Malate per day in divided doses. :) K

I'd get the iPad hands down. it's amazing what you can do with it. K

I would give tylenol (well, motrin is my preference) and would do DTap, Hib, Pneum. Vitamin D status significantly affects how well our body mounts immune responses. Be sure she's taking it per AAP recs. vitamindcouncil.org has the most current, comprehensive vitamin D information available. Think of it as a clearing house for the D research. I take 6,000 IU per day (1000 IU per 25 lbs body weight) and this is keeping my blood levels at 64 ng/mL. Fwiw, I am fairly sun avoidant. K

Magnesium deficiency. K

Consider also supporting hormonal balance nutritionally - a great multi with sufficient iron, sufficient zinc and D from a multi and additional supplements are almost always necessary for teens to meet their needs of these nutrients. Natrol My Favorite Multiple Take One is a great multi and very inexpensie from iherb.com ($4.50/month) Here is a link to some info on zinc and D as well: https://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AV3S7fNjwg33ZHp0bWN3cV8xMjJqbTZzZm43OQ&hl=en most of the info at the following link was something I wrote for a skincare board, but there is a significant amount of hormonal balance info there as well: https://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AV3S7fNjwg33ZHp0bWN3cV83ZnJrNXZrZDg&hl=en Wishing you the best as you all work through this, Katherine

I pefer first names but will defer, of course, to the person being addressed. I very much prefer Katherine. I *hate* it when people call me Mrs. Morrison and think it's rude for some to insist that their children call me that when I can't stand it. My kids use Mr. or Ms. or Mrs. or "FirstName" depending on the preferences of the person to whom they are speaking. K

It's just that pesky little impulse control thing;p We've been there with one of ours. The best thing you can do is what you are doing....removing the temptation. "Do not put a stumbling block in front of the blind..." Fwiw, six year olds experiment with taking things. 7 and 8 year olds doing the same thing typically have a lag in maturity with regards to impulse control. ADHD kids who are 2-3 years (to a full 1/3 depending on research) behind in some areas of development will display this sort of behavior longer. They of course need to return the item but we were cautioned over and over not to make a huge deal out of it or it *would* become a problem. We really just had to minimize/eliminate the settings in which she'd be tempted and if we found something that wasn't hers or she fessed up to taking something, we just calmly said, "Let's make sure to get this back to them right away." Best and hugs to you, Katherine