MN/WI We took 94 to 53 north.....

Doing things WITH someone else has been something we purposely added recently. My kids are so independent and do ONLY what THEIR responsibility is. So while it was easier to assign each one a specific task, with our "timed chores" - they can work together to fold the laundry and put it away, or work together to clean up the dishes. It has helped things all around. We also added a "must play with a sibling" for 1/2 an hour a day rule. Seems silly, but they were getting more and more annoyed with each other and each sticking to themselves and hyper critical of the others (too childish, or whatever). Now they SEARCH each other out because that's part of their "daily tasks" and try to play what the other one wants to play, because the kids have the option to say "no thanks, I don't want to play". If they can't find anyone willing to play with them, they have another 1/2 hour of household chores to do. (Do I just sound crazy? :) ) The explanation of that to the kids is that YOU NEED TO BE NICE! If no one wants to play with you, you're probably being a little too bossy or something. The first week was torture for two of my kids because no one did want to play with them and they ended up doing more chores. FINALLY they got the point and have started coming out of their own little worlds of selfishness. Whew! There's probably something totally wrong with all that logic - just bad parenting on our part probably for the last 15 years to get them to that selfish level, and this method is probably totally wrong, but it's been working for us. :) Why are there only 1000 books on parenting? It's certainly not enough. There should be one for each child in the world. :)

It has been 2 years since my dh works at home - worlds colliding has been extremely difficult. His expectation was that we should create an environment similar to that of a work office environment. Not going to happen. Not for 40 hours between 8 and 5 with five kids under 14. The first year he started off giving his input on every single school lesson and giving "helpful" household organizational tips. He also expected to live life normally as he did when he was normally at home on a weekend or evening - and sat down in the living room any time of day listening to sports radio or doing something else in the "common areas" that would totally distract from the pre-set school setting of the last 8 years. We set up a "black and white" schedule - which he hated, because his job now had flexible hours, but his flexibility would mean the other 6 of us would have to work around his whims. Not a happy family situation. We have re-discussed the schedule several, several times. And when we go by it - truly life works so much better. We have a spreadsheet of where each person is expected to be at which time of day. Not SUPER structured - but things like: dh work 8 - noon, lunch noon to 12:30, group lessons 12:30 til 2:00. This way we ALL know who should not be disturbed or interrupted when. Several times my dh will interrupt the kids to go finish cleaning their room, or bring the garbage out, or help him with a task. An OCCASIONAL exception would be okay, but it gets to be A LOT - so I have started to ask him: If the kids were in (public) school would you be going into the school and taking them out for this task? If they did not complete the tasks expected of them before school starts, they will get a consequence, but they can not be interrupted 20x a day to go do little household tasks. At least I haven't done it that way. :) So then it's a matter of: who's way are we going to do this? Because of it's his way - he's going to have to do all of it because we're on such different pages sometimes. COMMUNICATION is really, really important! Also, there are about 3 meetings online a week where we need NO INTERRUPTIONS for an hour at a time. He had a very hard time letting us know and would be surprised and upset if one of the kids came walking along or were getting in an argument around his work area at that time. But they had NO IDEA he was on a call. So it's been training him to learn to communicate meeting times to us ahead of time. You both need to talk about what you expect! Because chances are it's going to be different on both sides! On the positive side, my husband, who is passionate about history, has taught 3 years of history to the kids in a year and a half and made it EXTREMELY interesting to them. He is also better at math and can help explain things quickly to the kids when they need help instead of me (who has to look things up again just to be sure). He is also so much more aware of their skill and abilities levels - so he has become closer to them and more understanding of that. Not easy, but it HAS been a good change for us. Good luck!

Each of our kids does this 3x a week for 15 minutes. My kids were all terrible at any simple tables. This program has all levels (or we bought the one with all levels) and the kids are timed against their previous times and race to beat them. All of them have greatly improved over the last 6 months. My 4th grader can do complicated fractions problems quickly in his head and I credit it to this program. When the basics are automatic, the rest just seems to be so much simpler.

This is still going well for us! I think it probably does work best to keep mixing things up all the time! Chore charts worked well when they were younger. Definitely eliminates that problem of one kid being more responsible than the other. Then I don't care if they take all day to pick up 12 legos. That's their choice to waste their day - so that's definitely a problem with the timing one. For half a year we did a chore basket, and they would have to randomly pull out x number of chores each day. Nope, not fair, just the way it was. I was tired of hearing "not my fault" or whatever, and I wanted them to realize the whole house is all of our responsibilities. After a while they grumble about everything. So either I have to hover over them and stop the complaining (which I do to a point) and then every once in awhile I shake things up completely to throw them off guard. :) Who knows what new idea I may have when the complaints start about this idea down the road. :) I'll probably steal someone's great ideas off of here!

Absolutely guys are responsible for themselves. We all need to hold every thought captive and deal with it. He wasn't saying it's WOMEN'S FAULTS for doing that AT ALL. What he was saying, is that with him and the friends he knew and the guys he grew up with, etc. etc. they are VERY VISUAL. Their thoughts and brains are instantly drawn to the immodesty and their thoughts get cranking. It is difficult for them - RIGHT OR WRONG - to focus on the personality of the girl when her boobs are half-hung out of her dress. That's all. Everyone's line is different. Like someone else pointed out, that's why schools make a black and white line. They try to help keep things in check.

We have done chore lists for years. And we hand out chores when the kids misbehave. It never seems to be "fair". I'm so tired of hearing about how unfair all the chores are! (And yes complaints about things not being fair earns them another chore!) NEW PLAN: SOOOO, this last week we started something new. We have "Chore time." All five kids know how to clean everything in the house (they've had that many chores over the last 15 years!), so our new idea is that they have to clean for 1/2 an hour a day after their schoolwork is completed. Anything they want to. Anything they notice needs to be done. They walk around the house and see what needs to be done and just do it. It has worked GREAT! Okay, we've only done it for a week, but the house has been cleaner and I haven't had to create lists or check charts or anything! No work on my part! The younger kids have 15 minutes a day. And they also each have 1/2 an hour a day of "time with your siblings". This has reduced a lot of squabbling as well! They now SEEK each other out and ask to play with each other. They also need to be kind, because if no one wants to play with them they will have to do another 1/2 hour of cleaning instead. :) Anyway, it's been working great! Hope I can report back in six months that this is still our plan because it's easy and the house is truly cleaner and there's been less fighting. :)

It would be nice to hear a response here from a guys perspective. 20 years ago in college I heard a talk at a christian group from a guy on why women should be modest. He talked about how what the girls wore distracted him from who they were. Guys are (generally) very visual. He encouraged all the young women in the room NOT to dress visually tempting as a HELP to guys. This was like a 1/2 hour talk, and it was really good to hear from the college guys perspective. My daughter is now 13, has a perfect body, and it has been very difficult to find things that are both attractive and modest. And don't even talk about how difficult it has been to find swimsuits that way! :) But we do it. For the guys. To keep them focused on HER, her personality, who she is, etc. - not be distracted by her body - to put temptation out there for GUYS to sin with their minds. It's not because of any dress code. It's because of a choice we make to keep the temptation down. I want comments about my daughter to be about how nice she is, how sweet, how kind - not just how hot she looks. Sure she can look nice too, but I hope the comments are about how beautiful she is, and followed with character attributes about her being a nice person. I overhear a lot of the kids talking about other kids and it focuses on their looks and bodies - not their personalities.

We did SOTW with reading the chapters, asking review questions right afterwards and that was it. Nothing extra. No extra history books. No extra projects. Just the story. It's a solid base of history, and written in a way my kids (and I!) were able to follow. The other stuff LOOKED interesting, and we purchased some other things to go along with it, but just still have them basically untouched. My boys loved history and went off on tangents of their own. My daughter and I, well, we know the generalities of things. And for now, I think that's enough. :)

I think maybe I need to visit Answers in Genesis to browse the books in person. :) Wouldn't that be fun? I will check out the ones you recommended. The thing with AIG is that they OFTEN times start out assuming you're in complete agreement with the Bible. And when talking evolution - often times that's a whole separate issue that ends up getting dragged into the discussion - whether the Bible is true or not. That's why I was hoping for one to stay focused on the science differences between intelligent design vs. evolution. To EKS: Read, read, read. (That's why college was great - I had time for reading back then. :) ) I read both sides of the argument and kept reading until I felt convinced of the intelligent design side and I could adequately debate arguments on both sides. I think it's helpful to be knowledgeable about both sides and what one side is going to be supporting, etc. The last books I read were by Philip E Johnson. Not sure if you read them alone if they would be as conclusive as I found them to be, because I had read so much before that. Guess I'm looking for something similar to his books on a simpler level. And perhaps - that's just impossible! :) It's a very in-depth topic! If it were simple, there wouldn't be this much debate! :)

NOT LOOKING FOR DEBATE! Please take debates offline with anyone else who wants to debate - not me. Briefly: I grew up a strong evolutionist, but in college disproved evolutionism with hard core science facts (and YEARS of intense research). Again, NOT looking to argue these points. HERE IS MY NEED FOR HELP: A lot of the current intelligent design books start with a belief that the Bible is true. And because the Bible is true we can reason that.... I DO believe that the Bible is true, however, it IS also possible to successfully argue the same point that evolution is false without entering into the religious field at all. There are ADULT books that bring up these points, but my question is, are there any books for kids or teens? I like Jay Wile's Apologia series because it basically does that - it argues science FIRST and then says, hey, coincidentally, did you know the Bible says this as well? (Clever) We use those textbooks but is there another book/author out there that talks JUST about the intelligent design/evolution arguments from this point? Thanks! I know this can be a hot debate, which (again) I'm not looking for, so if anyone starts ranting, I will report my own thread to be pulled. :)

Rosetta Stone version THREE - which has the speaking assessments/tools. Pricy, but we'll be using it for five kids. I've looked/tried other curriculums, but that has been the best because it incorporates so many things - learning, listening, speaking, reading, spelling, writing, phrases...and is independent learning unless they really get stuck on something. We also have some supplementary kids books we picked up at flea markets in Germany, but only a few, we'd love some more. I can't find a decent priced place to pick up any more in the states. I can find ebay.de sellers who are willing to ship them, but shipping from Germany is also very pricy and a lot of sellers say no, so it's been a lot of work that way.

There are so many factors to consider - learning style, brain readiness, exposure to reading, genes, personality of the child, personality of the parent, time of day, health, etc. etc. We basically taught all five of our kids the same way. Lots of reading, lots of exposure, etc. With the things we COULD control. Results? Child one - taught himself how to read at 4 1/2 Child two - LOTS of effort on our part, finally "clicked" just before 6th birthday, still lots of reading comprehension struggles - definitely an auditory learner. Child three - reading at 5 through "normal" paths, easy to teach Child four - took 18 months to learn the alphabet and sounds by age 6, reading 3 letter words at 6 1/2, STRUGGLING reader, intense, intense daily work with this child for reading - bright otherwise Child five - learned to read by himself just before he was three. So I think the question you're asking is - can YOU control how and when your child reads? My answer is: to a limited extent. Do what you can, but observe the rest and don't feel frustrated if it doesn't click. Keep at it, and keep watching for other possible learning struggles, vision struggles, comprehension, etc. etc. I think a lot of people may compare it too much and force it too much and it becomes a chore for the child. Keep reading FUN! If it's fun, if it's a topic they're interested in (comic books, or dinosaurs, whatever it is) - they will try that much harder. Have fun! :)

WWJD? We had a similar situation with a group I was part of. One very abrasive, single mom who talked loudly, laughed loudly, smelled bad, interrupted, told inappropriate jokes, treated her kids rudely, etc. Totally mixed in with the wrong crowd. People cringed when she sat by them, etc. She came back faithfully. We figured God had a purpose. We didn't see it, but there was a reason. She came for 5 years and is still part of the group. Her edges are s-l-o-w-l-y softening. She still stands out from the rest of us, but we've accepted her. She IS part of the group and so wants to be with us. We try to include her and assign her occasional tasks because she takes great pride in being able to help. Many times our responses are like counselors when she says something rude. "Yes, it certainly is hard, isn't it?" There are still many awkward moments, but it's okay. That's what WE decided to do. And as far as the children situation - all kids follow our rules 100% of the time. I don't care what it's like at home and what they're allowed to do. I hover around any kids who are rude and harp on them (in a polite way) until they follow the rules like the rest of the kids. They will be respectful in our group. If they look at me sour, I may tell their parents "so-and-so might be mad at me, I made them stop interrupting so the presenter could finish their talk uninterrupted." Her kids are now respectful in our groups. They have learned. The kids will either shape up or stop coming. Either way is a good solution for you. :) Good luck! Definitely not an easy solution!

WOW! I'm not the only one skipping the tests? This has been a great encouragement for me! I don't do the tests for all the reasons above. I'm in this for a fun, easy way to expose the kids to all of history. We do daily quizzes, a few activities, etc. This is elementary/jr high level. I'll expect more memory from them at the next level.

We LOVE the CDs. It's just a little bit of instruction each day. My kids COULD just read through the stuff in the book, but sometimes they wouldn't understand a new word, etc. and I would be getting little questions every day from the kids or repeat things frequently because they weren't understanding the explanations. Not a big deal, but still a lot of little interruptions. We mostly tried the CD for one of my kids who has real reading comprehension problems. Once we got the CDs and they could HEAR the words, things clicked. Since we got the CDs, the questions have gone from about 20 little math questions a week (between 3 kids) to 2. The best feature is that the kids can pause it at any time to think about it, then "rewind" it to review part of the lesson again. They also do practice problems and those are great. If they can't do the practice problem with the instructor, they rewind it and listen again to see what they missed and try it again. Once they have the practice problem(s) correct they feel confident about going to their books and doing their daily lesson.

Your marbled paper idea looks neat! A few questions though... What kind of paper did you use? Construction paper? Regular computer paper? Did you lay the paper on top of the water then to get it to marble? Or dip it in? Or....?? Where do you buy marbling ink? I told you I need an art class for dummies. :) This would be a really fun project though for the kids and then they could make cards out of them or something. My problem is I just don't know where to start or what's going to be too complicated! This seems simple enough! Thanks so much!

I am super uncrafty and basic craft skills and logic escape me. But my kids like to do them. :) I was hoping for some ideas for some fun (self-contained kits preferably) that have projects that are practical. Like soap-making kits or stained glass mosaic kits or .....?? Something more substantial for my teenagers than the simple preschool or early elementary projects. But I need STEP BY STEP instructions and a self-contained kit would be best because if it tells me just to get a X1 rL opaque wire and strips of cortex aztec cloth etc, then I will have to be donating the book to Goodwill. Basically crafts for dummies that are nicer than gluing popsicle sticks together and decorating them with glitter glue. Do those type of things exist? Thanks! From the severely art-inept...

Any recommendations for Etymology books? We've read a few quick, smaller books, but they only touch on certain words. I thought there would be a decent etymology book out there somewhere that's something like a dictionary, only it has where words came from. I searched the forum but couldn't seem to find anything, and I only find the smaller books elsewhere. Any recommendations? Thanks!

Excellent, I want to tune in to this comparison too! I'm desperate for a literature program!

We loved it during the young elementary years for the same reasons you listed. Once they were in 4th grade we switched to Saxon math WITH the DIVE Cd/DVDs. Without the CDs, they needed way too much help from me. :) Not that I mind giving HELP, but I'd be repeating myself over and over. That's what the pause button on the CD is for - so they can listen to it over and over and do the practice problems, and go back and forth until they get it. Otherwise we might have stayed with the other program! It was FUN, and a lot of PRACTICAL problem-solving so they understood why they were learning the concepts. Not just a bunch of routine drills. Not that drills are bad, we still did learning wraps and some other routine things as well, but when the whole text seems to be that way it was a STRUGGLE!

My husband teaches history and he's passionate about it and gets the BOYS totally drawn into it. My daughter is bordering on comatose levels regardless of any history subject - any academic subject probably actually. :)

Woohoo! I don't have any to share unfortunately, but am eager to glean this information! Love this site and the willingness to share ideas!! Thanks!

Interested in the answers to this.... These sound like a GREAT extra addition to an already great program.

Wish I'd done more free writing and not nitpick on spelling which created a BLOCK for writing. My kids couldn't write because they were too scared of spelling something wrong. We dropped spelling completely at the advice of a homeschool mom who had kids in college. She said the more the read, the more spelling will just LOOK right to them. We were focusing on nitpicky rules which they couldn't remember at a young age. Their spelling stayed terrible but we only corrected ideas. Didn't even go back and correct spelling or grammar. They got better and better at writing ideas and stories. Out of the blue (granted 1 1/2 years later) spelling fell into their laps and they jumped 1 to 2 grade levels without a whit of spelling lessons. Now that they feel comfortable writing, we can go over SMALL rules occasionally as they come up and they are old enough to remember them. For US - it worked great. For 4 of 5 kids. We have one STRUGGLING reader. For him, we have had to teach him with rules and TONS of repetition. It has taken him about 4x longer to learn how to read than the other kids. (Yes, he has a form of dyslexia.)