:iagree:

I wouldn't worry about "advanced maternal age" too much. I was 37 when I had my last baby. It was the easiest of my pregnancies. It was the easiest delivery. It was he shortest and least agonizing labor. It was also the quickest recovery. The only problem I had was my sugar was high. I almost failed the 3 hour glucose test. I don't know if that had anything to do with my age though.

Exactly!

OhElizabeth, I appreciate your input. I do like some of your suggestions, and had already considered some of them. As for school, we are already on our light summer schedule. We are only working on the subjects we hadn't finished for the year yet, along with review sheets, so that no one forgets everything they learned, and reading. The year that we took the summer off everyone forget everything they ever learned. The last time we took a few weeks off, it was utter chaos. They seem to need the schedule and something to keep them out of mischief part of the day. Plus, I don't want the huge struggle of getting everyone back into a routine when summer is over. I personally would LOVE to take the time off, but it never seems to work well for us.There's more fighting. There's more attitude. There's more chaos. In a few more weeks we will be going down to three days a week due to our summer weekend events. I don't know, maybe we could just switch to the 3 day schedule now. There's no scheduling problem on my end. I don't mean that as rudely as it sounds. I'm a scheduler - a planner - a former secretary. I have great schedules. I have great time management skills. The rest of the crew, not so much. They take after their Dad. The kids and Dad are all very (what's a nice word?) laid back about time and deadlines, with no sense of urgency. My expectations are not too high, I give everyone plenty of time to properly complete tasks, but they dawdle, stall, wander off, or refuse, messing with the schedule, and putting me into an end of the day panic trying to get dinner on the table and people fed in time for the younger ones bedtime. You do make some very good points and have some good suggestions. Thank you. I appreciate it. You may only have two children, but you do have experience with something I don't, 10 year olds. I think I don't know enough about them for this job. I'll definitely consider more attention and structure and look for something that he does well to nurture. Thank you all. I'm going to bed now and I will think about all the excellent advice I have received here and see if I can devise the master plan for restoring obedience and sanity to my home.

That's what I was going to recommend!

I view clean and tidy differently. My house is always clean. It's often very untidy. Clean: I wash out the kitchen sink and wipe down the counters and faucets after every load of dishes. The stove is wiped down daily. The floor is swept daily. The kitchen floor is washed once a week, with spot cleaning in between. The bathroom gets a light wipe down every time I visit it. The bathroom gets a deep clean once a week. The carpet is frequently vacuumed. I really hate carpet, but that's another discussion. Things are dusted. Tidy: No toys, books, and laundry every where. We tidy up before dinner, before bed and when company is coming. I'd like the house tidy all the time, because I'm just that kind of person, but the kids have a different opinion. Just the other day I put all the youngest's toys back into their basket, turned around a minute later and he dumped them all back out again. My house is clean, but most days, in the middle of the day, it looks like a tornado ripped through it.

I've been getting flat out ignored. This is not acceptable in our home and they both know it. When we speak, they are to acknowledge that they heard us. We do the same when they speak to us. Well, first I get ignored. Then I ask, "Did you hear me?" They reply with a groaned, miserable "Yes Ma'am". But no one moves. I'm usually giving instructions in passing, as I prepare breakfast, nurse the baby, grab my paperwork for school, etc. But I always check back in a matter of minutes and ask why isn't anyone doing what they are told. Then if no one's moving I say something about how they were told to do X and they need to do it NOW, not next Tuesday. I do my job, Daddy does his job and you need to do yours. Now let's MOVE! Then I stand there giving them the evil eye while I wait for them. The behavior hasn't festered long. We've never tolerated this. I may have become a bit more lax in the past year because I've been busy taking care of a baby, but I also expected that since they were older, they could be expected to follow simple instructions without me standing over them cracking a whip. Like all children, they get distracted or forget, but in the last few weeks it has became flat out ignoring me. I've tried to explain that if everyone would just do what they are supposed to do, when they are supposed to do it everyone would be happier and have more time to do fun things. Right now, the older two children are more work than the little two. In addition, the constant chasing down and reminding, and repeating myself with the older two is cutting into the time I have for the little ones. I seem to be saying, "In a minute honey, Mommy's busy" to the 3 year old all of the time. He's constantly being put off while I do something for the baby or the older kids. He's really getting the short changed around here, he's smart enough to know it, and now he's giving me more grief than normal because he knows that will make me stop what I'm doing and pay attention to him. They way things are right now, I'm so busy over-seeing, nagging, and being frustrated at the older kids that I have no time left in the day to enjoy them or show them any love.

I'm sorry. I do understand. Back in January we had numerous problems with our computer and the printer. I was frustrated, fell behind in school work and I cried. Heck, I cried last week simply because the printer decided to not communicate with the computer. I cry more over computer related issues than anything else in my life.

I do something in between the two descriptions quoted. BTW Whisbone Dawn, LOVE the descriptions, especially the first one. Our first year we had a newborn in the home, it was Kindergarten, and it almost seemed like an after-thought most days. It was very fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants, and I HATED it. The next year I did a weekly plan. Much better. I did find though that it wasn't always enough time to get the library books I needed or other crafting/experiment items from the store. So the next year I looked ahead a little further. I tried to always be working on lesson plans 3-4 weeks ahead. Much better for my sanity. I've also learned to have any material I need from my computer or the Internet printed out a few weeks in advance. You never know when your motherboard is going to die:glare: or your Internet service interrupted, or printer decides to be a PITA. And yes, I know all 3 of these from unpleasant first hand experience. So yes, I lesson plan. But no rubrics, state standards, benchmarks, or educationalese.

This might work. It is challenging though when there are other things and children that need my attention. I think that's the part that is the most upsetting. It's hard to stand over him or his sister, when the two younger children are needing something or getting into something they shouldn't be. Ahh, maybe not doing anything but standing in the corner (he really hates that) until the job is competed would work. No food until the job is done should get to him, he has hit the point where he eats a lot. Thanks for all the suggestions. I have ideas now. I feel less lost and frustrated.

He's not attached to material things. Sure, he likes his Lego's, he would be really angry if I threw them out, but being denied access to them for a day doesn't upset him. The same applies to any other toy or video game.

The problem is, I've got one with the "I don't care" attitude. No computer time for you. He doesn't care. No dessert for you. He doesn't care. I can't give him chores for punishment, he's refusing to do his current chores. I can't send him to bed early, he was not going to bed when sent already. Do I physically drag him to the shower? Is there any option other than spanking, or is that what it's going to have to boil down to?

make an older child (8 to 10) do what they are told? We're having a real problem with this this week and I'm tired of being stressed out and angry over the situation. I repeat the request and still get no response. I'm getting pretty fed up. It's not just one thing in particular. Lately it seems to be everything: school work, chores, getting in the shower, cleaning up toys, getting ready for bed. Not only is it frustrating for me, but it sets a bad example for their younger brother.

My children started reading with HOP and Bob books. These are books with basically cvc words and pictures. When these books became to easy for them, I moved them up to the next level or easy readers, and continued doing so through all the levels available. We never read books focusing on sight words. When the children were reading cvc type books, they read aloud to me daily. When they finally got into chapter books I began only having them read one page aloud to me daily, for the practice of reading out-loud and so that I could assess where they were skill-wise. My 10 year old doesn't really read aloud to me anymore (but we do take turns reading aloud for Science and History). He reads books like Redwall, Eragon, and the Hobbit. His younger sister (8 1/2) still reads a page to me aloud daily. She is beyond leveled readers, but not quite able to read the kinds of books her brother reads yet. She's reading books from both the Little House on the Prairie series and the Narnia series. For beginning chapter books for a boy I would recommend the Magic Tree-house books.

I just found this for Ohio: Homeschooling regulations are unreasonable, including teacher licensure and mandatory state approval of homeschool curricula What? the homeschooling regulations are NOT unreasonable. Teacher licensure? What is this? You just need a high school diploma (or equivalent, I believe) to homeschool. There is no state approval of curricula. Someone clearly doesn't know what they are talking about. Ok folks, if this information can be wrong, there may be plenty of other information about other state's that is way off base, too. "Ohio performs poorly in nearly every conceptual area. Spending and taxation are higher than average, with administration, education, and social-service spending especially high as a percentage of personal income. On the plus side, government debt is below average." Well sure the government debt is below average, taxation is higher than average. They've got more money to play with. Ohio is ranked as number 42. New Hampshire looks good. I probably wouldn't like the weather.

Kids meals are hardly any food at all. No, I wouldn't pay $2 more for that. My 10 year old son now needs to order off the adult menu because the kids meal is not enough food for him.

For my family, I set my own standards. I expect to see an effort being made, as well as progress. We cannot compare ourselves to other homeschoolers or even the public school. I've met people that expect children to be reading at age 5. Even I expected that when we first started out. Now I know that not all kids are ready to read at age 5. No amount of forcing the issue will make it happen. We work till mastery in math. If that puts us "behind" where other children their ages are, so be it. At least my children will understand the math. I'm very determined to make sure my children can write well, including having good spelling and a good understanding of grammar. I don't know how they are doing compared to other children of their age, but in the end, they will know more than their publicly schooled peers. I don't think it matters right now if they are "ahead" or "behind", because, like the reading, you can't force it. When they get it, they get it. It could be next month, next year, or two years from now. I'm teaching them the skills they need, but I cannot force them to perform to some invisible standard. We do actively homeschool. It's generally 5 days a week. I cover all the required subjects and sometimes more. Sure, some days we only do school work for 2 hours a day, because we have other things to do that day. But in our house, we take our homeschooling seriously. I don't keep the kids home with me to help with the little ones or the chores (although they do that some). I never lower my standards, but I might edit my time-line.

My third child had jaundice in 2007, and the advice we were given, by multiple doctors and nurses and both the Ped's office and the hospital were to nurse as much as possible and set him in his car seat in front of a window.

A chocolate martini would provide both your needs in one item.

You could rent her out! That's nice that she's helping you. Last time I made it clear I was trying to lose weight my Mom brought me Oreos.

Black beans, Spanish or Mexican rice, grapes and cantaloupe.

Wheelchair: I'm never alone. Oh wait, I was alone once at a party in March, and I still used the wheelchair stall, out of habit.

There are some things at my parents house that I really don't care about. They are pack-rats and never get rid of anything. I know I saw my old prom dresses in the closet of the "sewing room" and my old bicycle in the garage. I really don't know if there is anything else there or not. I told my mom to do what the wanted with my high school yearbook. I hated high school. I have no desire to look back at any of it. If it were to show up on my doorstep tomorrow I would probably just throw it out.

The above is what I prefer. So I voted "other".

That didn't occur to me. Tomorrow I will update the rule. Thank you!