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Posts posted by mellifera33

  1. I understand. I've struggled with this too. I'm having trouble articulating my thoughts atm, so I'll come back to this. 


    Okay. So ds is in a social skills group. He is learning to categorize behaviors by the impact they have on others--does the behavior make others feel good about you, feel okay about you, think you're weird, think you're annoying, or is it just plain against the rules. Reasonable enough, especially when he's dealing with the general public. But it seems exhausting to me to analyze everything you do to determine its impact. And he doesn't. When he's with his buddies, he can act a little weird, and they're all okay with that. He is learning when he has to be especially careful--say, on a playground with kids he doesn't know well--and when he can relax a bit--when he's playing with his friends who know him and won't shun him for his little odd habits. It helps that he has several friends who are also on the spectrum, so they either don't notice or don't care about atypical mannerisms. 


    Pop-culture wise, I think that now is a good time for kids who have geeky interests. Minecraft, Star Wars, Doctor Who--they're all acceptable interests for kids. Actually, my kiddos are more pop-culture attuned than I ever was. Somehow they learned about dabbing, and every time we listen to music in the car they're all dabbing like mad. I won't pretend to understand that one. :)

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  2. My favorite thing about old cookbooks is when a curry recipe for 8-10 people calls for 1/4 tsp of curry powder, "or less to taste." Now I understand why my Nana still had nearly full bottles of 50 year old spices. She offered them to me when she moved to an assisted living facility. "They're still good--spices last forever!"  :lol: I should have taken her up on her offer--the bottles were probably worth something!

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  3. I think it all depends on your culture and the people. Where I grew up, gatherings wrapped up by 9pm.

    Now I have Serbian neighbors who think nothing of sitting out on their patio, drinking coffee and chatting til at 

    least midnight, even midweek. They're very considerate, though, and do their best not to be overly loud.

    They're definitely much better than the previous neighbors who would seriously "party", with loud music and

    "enhanced" refreshments.


     Sitting outside and drinking coffee until midnight with neighbors sounds lovely. :)

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  4. In our area there are not enough professionals to deal with the number of kids who are on (or suspected of being on) the spectrum. There are wait lists for diagnoses, wait lists for therapies, and kids who need meds get a consult with a child psychiatrist and then are bumped back to their pediatrician or family doc for monitoring. I know from talking with other moms that there are a lot of primary care docs who feel unequipped to deal with complex kids, but who are having to pick up the slack while families wait for months for an appointment with a specialist. I sometimes hear people complain that primary care doctors are too quick to prescribe psychoactive meds for kids, but that has not been my experience, or the experience of the moms who I know.  


    My ds was officially diagnosed with autism after a 60 minute appt., but that was after various evals and screenings with speech therapists and school and private psychologists. The diagnosing psychiatrist put together all of the pieces for the "permanent record." On the other hand, I talked with a mom who has a kiddo in the same social skills group as ds, and her child has been receiving therapies for five years without a firm diagnosis. I also know moms who do not want a diagnosis for their kids, and who receive services with a diagnosis of "anxiety disorder nos" or something else that is less stigmatizing than an autism diagnosis.  

  5. I like freestyle. Other versions of the program didn't do it for me, but I feel like this one is doable for the long term. I lost 8 lbs in the first two weeks, and am looking at probably holding steady this week--retaining water and cough *froyo* cough. The free foods steer me toward healthy basic meals, and the points allow for special meals and treats. I can eat when I am hungry, and I'm not getting the shaky hangry feeling I got on prior versions of ww--free protein must be making the difference. 

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    I think it is hilarious when I travel and see "American" food. Like when we went to Costa Rica, and my son orderered a "perro caliente" (hot dog) which was covered in mayo and salad. In our Belgian grocery store, I can buy a prepackaged "American" hot dog with a cakey bun and a slice of processed cheese. I can also buy "American" condiment sauce which I think is a mix of ketchup, mustard, mayo & pickles, but I'm not brave enough to try it. So I can see why people who have experience with food from Mexico comment on the difference and are amused when people think that Mexicans eat taco bowls.




    :) In Sweden, it seemed that the secret ingredient to make anything "American" was corn. American pizza? Cover it with corn! American pasta? Cover it with corn! American sandwich? Throw some corn in it! We were a bit puzzled, but, hey, it's corn, so it was all good. 

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  7. My kiddo who has dyscalculia enjoys Beast. We work a level or two down, we pick and choose which problems to do, and we do a bit of review every day so that he doesn’t lose skills. I don’t expect him to retain everything in BA, but the deep and thinky approach helps him to retain the basic concepts. Edited to add that I sit with him while he works on it, and we frequently discuss/brainstorm approaches to the problems. It’s definitely not an independent program for him.

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  8. When I hear homeschoolers cite school shootings as a reason for homeschooling I inwardly cringe and think that their child is more likely to be injured or killed in a car accident on the way to a homeschool coop or meetup than a ps student is to be the victim of a school shooting.

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  9. When we were looking for houses we rejected any that were too open. We love the house we found--the kitchen and family room are open to each other, but there is a separate living room and a dining room (now a homeschool room) that can be completely closed off. We looked at a ginormous house with an entirely open 1st floor. What do you even do with a gym-sized space? My childrens' already noisy voiced would echo all day and drive me around the bend. No thank you.

  10. There's a lot of strategizing and getting people to work together that goes along with team sports. The successful businessmen/women I know who were athletes tended to play team sports rather than individual ones. If it were simply just a matter of needing an outlet for excess energy, then why would it make a difference whether it was a team sport vs. an individual one?



    I think it's a personality thing. The same gregarious, charismatic people who tend towards team sports would tend to be good networkers and successful in business. 

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