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Rose in BC

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Everything posted by Rose in BC

  1. Yes I think that is what is happening. That and I honestly think he might be not wanting to go but won't admit that. I told him he could change his mind. "You'd love that, bleep, bleep, bleep," was his response. (RAD is very difficult....when he's raging he curses up a storm ...and neither my dh or I are cursers. It's very hurtful.)
  2. That's certainly my romanticized version of this story. I don't know. He is really an emotionally challenged boy already. We have tried everything...he refuses everything (counciling, etc) saying that we are his problem. I am hoping he will see how much we love and care for him after this trip but I'm not holding my breath.
  3. Oh it's a bad plan completely opposite to what we wanted to do. We had offered to take him on our summer vacation. Birthmother, in not uncertain terms, said she didn't want that. We have three adopted children, two of them would never go for a plan like this but my ds 15 has attachment disorder and oppositional defiance disorder...we have struggled with him since day one. And he doesn't take ANY advice from us. We have involved social services who have been in contact with birthmother. They will check in with ds once he's there. I don't have to think does she want him to stay, I KNOW she does. She told me (she is bi-polar and schizophrenic) that we've had him 12 years, now it's her turn. My ds says he has no intention of staying longer than a week. I'm not sure what will happen. As soon as he boards plane we'll book return (I still have a small inkling he may not go). Socials services council told us we should let him go. Given his FASD, ODD and RAD they think we'd make things worse(its pretty bad now, not sure how much worse it could be). I am very worried. Believe you me, I understand comments that refer to him being fifteen and that we are his parents so we should have more control of situation. A child with RAD is a whole different ball game. They don't think conventionally and they don't have a normal bond of trust. They do what they want, when they want. I am not happy with situation but we're trying to make the best of it.
  4. No, because neither he nor birthmother wanted anyone to accompany him. Social Services in that city will check in on him (upon my insistence). We have a "kit" gift cards, phone numbers, maps, etc. My sister lives two hours away and is on stand-by. The worst thing? At this moment my son, who is very stressed out about this but would never admit it, has declared his hatred towards me. I know it's symbolic because I am the mother (a natural target for RAD kids) but it hurts. I took the week off of work thinking I could make some special meals etc, leading up to departure day but its not going quite as rosy as I had dreamed. It's been a tough few days.
  5. Good to hear his experience was positive. From what I do know about birth mom, I'm not so sure this will be the case in this scenario.
  6. You may remember my 15 yr old ds found his birthmother on Facebook in May. Well she sent him a plane ticket and he is going to see her July 4th. As time ticks closer i can see the stress building in him but he's insistent on going. Honestly I won't be surprised if he changes his mind at last minute, which we would fully support. I guess we'll see Thursday. I'm drained from the drama already but there could be a lot more ahead.
  7. When I had that procedure it was a quick pinch and honestly I don't remember any significant pain afterwards, maybe a little cramping. I did have a tiny bit of bleeding for a day or so afterwards. Very light.
  8. Thank you. Very little sleep last night. Some days I'm not sure I'm cut out for this job :).

  9. Jennifer it turns out that most likely we won't make it to Terrace until next week. If anyone in my extended family goes before I do I'll send along the books with them.


    If the plan changes I'll let you know.



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