Thank you for all of the feedback. The school psych pointed out a lot of the areas where he was succeeding and said the work we've done in reading and writing has been really successful. So, I'm very grateful. We still have a long ways to go with other areas: math and for sure--typing. All of these comments are reflective of how things went today, so I feel pretty confident that I couldn't have gotten more help and I feel validated in the amount of work we have done on our own. Thank you all of you!

Hi, I just had a battery of academic tests done by the school for my son. We tested him three years ago with a pediatric neurospych and he was found to have dyslexia, dysgraphia, asperger's and possible adhd. That was in 3rd grade. Now in 6th grade, I had the school psych test him and he has been judged to have no findings of learning disabilities. They are still meeting with me to discuss his IEP today, but I'm confused. I do agree that he probably doesn't have asperger's. However, I work with him one on one all the time and I can see that writing is extremely hard for him. Especially compared to his younger siblings. He becomes mentally exhausted after writing two paragraphs, and that's with me sitting beside him. He can produce a five paragraph essay, but he needs a lot of coaching and emotional support to do it. Doesn't low processing speed also indicated a kind of dyslexia? Or does it count as a special learning disability? They only provided me with scaled scores for Woodcock Johnson. His scaled score for things like Math Facts fluency, Sentence Writing, and Academic fluency are all in the Low Average range. The majority of his scaled scores are in the average range, but... He scores very high (or even off the chart for Phoneme/Grapheme) for Basic reading, Math problem solving, Letter-Word ID, Spelling of Sounds. He has finished Barton Level 6. He has been mostly homeschooled and given very expensive tutoring. He has scores in the Superior range for visual processing. On cognitive processing and perceptual speed he scores Low Average. Isn't this like, the profile of a dyslexic person? Is this just normal and I'm over-reacting? What does it mean that they say he doesn't have dyslexia? For sure he has the dysgraphia because you can see it. Should I dispute the findings? I think they will recommend some OT for handwriting, some keyboarding (we haven't had a lot of time to devote to it because of working on other areas), and maybe allow extra time for assignments and tests. Does that seem about right? Is there something I should disagree with or ask for that I'm missing? We've been paying big bucks for several years now for private tutoring and homeschooling, and I'm ready to put him in 5-day a week school for junior high. It would be great if the public school took the costs of whatever remediation he needs. We've done it ourselves because we didn't trust the system and it seemed more trouble than it was worth to force something through the system that we could do more rapidly on our own, but we're kind of tapped out and we have big work projects coming down the pike in the next two years so we can't keep doing it ourselves. Will these discrepancies in his abilities cause failure? Am I overly neurotic about all of this? Please help me!!!

I spent some time both last night and this morning talking with him. I was able to use the "left-handed" idea to explain how it's not his fault, and how sometimes it takes time for people/schools/institutions to catch up to new information about the brain, so that's why school can be hard. He actually got really emotional and when I asked why he said it was because he was so happy to have an explanation for why other kids could do their work so much faster than he could. Thanks for all of your insight and help. :grouphug:

Thank you all so much for these perspectives. Albeto, as the only left-handed person in both my family of origin and my family with kids, that's an awesome hook. I can really use that.

Did a full work up about a year and a half ago, and ds (age 10) has a diagnosis of dyslexia, dysgraphia, and high functioning Asperger's. I'm not sure I totally agree with the autism diagnosis because once we got it, his symptoms seemed to resolve a great deal. Anxiety???? After testing below grade level every year, at the end of 4th grade he's reading at 6th or 7th grade level. He just finished a 500 page novel. Writing/Spelling/ Math are still pretty gnarly. He's doing really well with making friends. We've talked about strengths and weaknesses, but I've never referred to his situation as "dyslexia" with him. We do hybrid homeschool, so I'm feeling like he's had some successes, we're starting a new year, and sitting down with his teacher, etc. might be a good idea. I don't know what we'll do for Junior High/High School, but I don't want to "surprise" him with new information at that point. I'm hoping that he'll learn to advocate for himself, but I also feel like he's doing so well that maybe I'm making too big of a deal. Friends, etc. say they don't notice any problems--his teachers always do--but ???? Need some validation/personal experiences, whatever. Did your dyslexic/hf apserger kid show great improvements, but then have setbacks? Did they improve, but you still use the diagnosis b/c it helps them understand themselves better? Has anyone had a really bad experience trying to have these kinds of conversations? I've read through every LD website on the topic, but I just need a little courage to jump off the ledge. Or warning to hold back? Thanks!

Ah!!! Thanks!!!!!

In the "meeting book" there is a page that says "FALL" and has three lines for what looks like sentence writing. There are similar pages for Winter, Spring and Summer. I can't find anything where it says what to write down on that page. Any ideas or are the kids just supposed to creatively write their seasonal thoughts about math there? I've spent an hour or two searching the curriculum and looking online. Grrrrr! Please help me!!! (I also have a 3rd grader and I haven't checked to see if she has the same thing going on in her calendar book too.)

Thanks to all of you for the encouragement and advice. After I posted this and talked to my husband, the tutoring center called me. The teacher told the director that he thought he'd sent too much work home with us, so they were calling to modify. So...that was a good sign. It really helps to hear everyone's experiences and ideas. I DO need to pay more attention to his overall mental health and happiness and not put so much stress on academics. So hard!!!

After long, hard thought I've decided not to send my DS 9/4th grade to public with an IEP. He has dyslexia, high functioning Asperger's and dysgraphia. (But when I tell anyone this, they don't believe me/seriously discount the idea.) So, we're doing hybrid classical homeschool. Two days a week, he goes to classes. Three days he attends tutoring, and I still have to help with homework, Barton, handwriting, etc. Last year, he did well in a small school with 8 kids and an aid. Now, we've moved, and ever since we started doing "school-like" things a week ago, it's like I've gone into a time warp back to two and three years ago. He is highly resistant to ANYTHING. Any work is like pulling teeth. So I have two questions: am I co-dependent if I let him off the hook? Setting a bad example for the whole school year if we "ease in." Have I created this situation by being to easy on him? Do I let him cry it out and then make him do everything required anyway? The tutoring center sent home a crapload of homework on the first day. :( He did six simple addition problems and then spent the afternoon crying himself sick. So, I gave up. Should I have told the tutoring center that they were requiring more than double or triple his usual output? They expect him to have a one page essay written by Wednesday. I've had pre-start-of-school warm-up exercises for a week that I can't get him to complete. It's technically the first day of school and we're in deep doodoo. Is this type of schooling a mistake? Should I just put him in public and be done with it? In the last two months we've moved countries, houses and started a new school. Is this just normal behavior for his diagnosis? Also, a question about the tutoring. I'm feeling really pressured by the person in charge--like constantly feeling like I'm not pushing him hard enough, or like we should take on "more" tutoring if we're going to be doing it right. We have him there three days a week, three hours a day. It's all I can afford. When we go with the "pressure" route, it usually gets us to an icky place in a short amount of time. Can anyone relate to this? He has a slow processing speed...his wind-up to answer something like 6+7+3 can be like ten throat clears and two or three slump overs, and then I'm losing it. Then we get through one question, we have twenty left to go, an essay and some reading comprehension to "finish up." I feel kind of resentful that the tutoring center is sending homework home to me. Am I wrong to feel like I'm paying them so that I can avoid this scenario? Am I the one who's soft? What is a "reasonable" number of hours of output for a kid this age? Three hours is a lot for him. Especially on the first day. The work they sent home is easily an additional three. I know I can get him up to six hours (possibly by December), but not on the first day back. I feel like I made this choice because the extra time at home would allow him to pursue science and art, which are his interests. However, it looks like we're on a fast track to math/language arts hell. I chose the tutoring because I thought it would let me have time to successfully homeschool my two younger kids. They seem to enjoy schoolwork. Feeling overwhelmed. :(

I'd agree with the previous poster and add that you might need to start looking around for outside help. Are you on your own with her or does she have other teachers, tutors, family help? See what can be covered by insurance, see what is available for free...sometimes high schoolers or older siblings of special needs kids can be great tutors and not so expensive. If you're needing to hone down on a particular skill and need expertise a high schooler isn't the answer, but ask yourself what tasks could be delegated. When I homeschooled prior to getting a diagnosis, the stress was simply unsustainable. I've had "bad" help and "good" help, and when it's good, it's great. It doesn't have to be a permanent change--maybe you just need to bring in extra help for a year, and then reassess next year?

My son, 9, has been in a private school with small class sizes. Due to his age, his teacher requested that he have an aid so that he can skip Spanish and so that he has help during language arts. Not being graded on spelling for in class writing exercises, not being required to "trade papers" for writing workshops or spelling tests not being forced to read out loud in class (or given certain texts ahead of time so she can practice.) Quiet room for tests or in-class writings, extra time or when appropriate reduced length of certain assignments. Check the Barton website for a list of recommended accomodations, and then adapt it to fit her strengths and weaknesses. We've had a lot of luck this year working with the private school--his anxiety is less, he's improving socially, and he is feeling more confident about his work. We still need to get working on a good Orton Gillingham based program, but we've had a good situation so far. Also, at the school his strengths in art and science are shining through.

Another possible sign to look for is attention and focusing. We have a dyslexia/dysgrahia/Asperger's with provisional ADHD now that my son is 9, but when he was 5 and six, there was an incredible process to getting him to work. From getting his attention off of whatever he was doing, moving him towards his work, focusing on it, then "doing" it. He couldn't last more than 15 minutes before he was wrung out. I spent two years of homeschooling him in 15 minute segments. At 7 years, wasn't able to grasp a second language despite being in a foreign country.

I like that idea of a band instrument--I might have to try that.

We do a lot of reading, and I'm hoping to continue doing Barton with him. We certainly have musical talent and interest in the family, but so far efforts to engage him musically have been a failure.And I have tried with that from an early age. He also has an Asperger's diagnosis, so since music is not his "thing" he puts up a big fight about it when it takes time away from his particular interests. I like the music suggestion, but the problem I run into is that I run out of "will." I have to force him to do basic hygeine, force him to do homework, force him to read, and by the time we get to something like music, it just seems like it's more effort (and strain on the family) than it's worth. Still, I'm curious how other people deal with this. Am I "giving up?" Should I push it with the music? We gave up with sports also because of his issues. He's only 9, so I'm hoping he'll come to sports later. It's just with 3 children total and the one using up most of my energy, I'm not sure where to cut off "extra" activities like sports and music when he's so resistant.

When I began to suspect that my son was dyslexic, we purchased some Barton packages, and when I became confused about whether or not he truly had dyslexia or Asperger's (eventually diagnosed with both), I called Barton and they were very helpful. Susan Barton spoke to me personally. I was wanting a dyslexia evaluation, but when I explained that I was also worried that there were Aperger symptoms, she was careful to explain that I was not a candidate for a "simple" dyslexia test, but that I would need full neuropsych evaluation. This was the recommendation of an earlier pedagogical psych that I had seen, so to have this repeated helped me come around to the idea of full testing (and committing to the time and cost of it), and also it helped get dh on board. Barton recommended the neuropsych that we acutally ended up using. She may not have a specific recommendation based on your location, but it can't hurt to try this route. She is extremely experienced with dyslexia issues, and I think travels around the country, so...look up the website and give them a call. They certainly recommend dyslexia testers or probably could help with a neuropsych.