This is pretty much where we are with our 20yo. He pays us for his car insurance, drives the "teen car" but will soon buy his own, works 3 days most weekends and buys his own gas and does repairs on the car, buys his clothes & toys. He also buys his own produce most times because he is a smoothie fanatic and I just can't keep up with him. When we go to a movie or out to eat, all working kids are expected to pay their own way (so this applies to the high school senior, too). If we bring food in, parents usually pay. Once in a while, when we are short I will talk ds into buying....he always has loose cash because he gets good tips. LOL He really doesn't have chores except for dishes a couple nights a week (sometimes gets done @ midnight) and dumping wastebaskets, mostly because he works long, hard days F-Sun. He supposed to keep his room clean and not leave a mess in the bathroom he shares with his sisters.

On my 3rd kid with this...all on dental insurance. We did use medical to fill the prescription for post-surgery pain killers. That's all. And yep, it was $$$$!

We live in NorCA - Sonoma County - and we found that dd's insurance down in Orange County was higher than it would be up here. It was about a $200/year difference, I think. You might be surprised on that point. Have a backup plan for the car if your student is far from home. DH had to fly down and help dd find a car in a weekend when she was in an auto accident. And we upped our AAA membership to premium on a friend's advice...good idea, as her college car has needed a number of tows - bad battery, bad alternator, etc. ETA: DD had to purchase a specific Mac for her art classes, along with a 4-year warranty. And they expect the students will need to replace them @ the end of college - but that will be dd's budget, not mine.

If you feel your older child needs intensive review of fractions, you might consider a detour to Key to Fractions/Key to Decimals or the Life of Fred Fractions/Decimals books.Math-U-See's fractions manipulatives are some of the best I've seen at explaining fractions topics...I think that's level Epsilon???? It sounds like your younger son would like some more challenge. You might consider doing the placement test for Singapore, which will give him a couple different ways to solve problems and some challenging word problems. Or you could just get the separate Challenging Word Problems books from Singapore. At home my 6th grader is using MUS Pre-Algebra and Singapore 6 A/B and they work well together.

My niece went to a therapeutic boarding school in high school. She was suicidal and failing all her classes with horrible friend choices. She completed the program and is in a better place mentally, and she caught up on her academics and was able to come home this year for her senior year; she really wanted to succeed at the same school where she had struggled. Guess what, it's still a struggle. She's better able to see & take responsibility for choices, but they're still often not the right choices. In her case, the place was chosen for its isolation and use of horses in therapy and work experience. It was not specifically christian, altho' my sis and her family are christians. What are the criteria for this choice? It helps to think what will appeal to/motivate the young person as well as looking at the quality of the program and the cost.

My dd started riding at age 9 thrugh a 4H Horseless Horse Project. This meant the project leader owned the horses and the girls basically worked every weekend doing stable work and got to learn to ride as well. They paid a nominal monthly fee to cover shoeing the horses they rode and she would take them to 4-H shows as long as we covered the cost of gas and feed. We lived in suburbia with islands of horse country, so had to drive to the stable 1/2 hour each way. DD is 22 now and a project leader herself with the same lady...now she's teaching 4-Hers and helping them at shows. It's been a great thing for her and the project leader has been a real mentor in her life. We had to buy a helmet and stable boots (from target, not the fancy ones); she was able to borrow everything else for the few shows she did, and her project leader takes the girls once/year to a big tack sale where she was able to get riding britches. She was never into reading all the horse novels I read as a kid, but the smell of horses is like perfume to her and probably always will be. ETA: She joined the breed association as a junior member and attended some local chapter meetings with her project leader. That led to about $3500 in scholarships for college from the local Arabian Horse Assn. chapter. Not the reason we joined, but well worth the $25 or so/year for a youth membership.

I would just tell her that your scope & sequence is different from that at her school (speaking her educationalese), so please don't try to apply the standards she works to for public school kids to yours. And I would tell her that assessments are not welcome at any time, but positive encouraging comments that build her grandchildren's self-esteem or introduce them to new hobbies she would like to do with them ARE welcome. I might even invite her along on a family "field trip" to a museum or whatever (and discourage schooly-type scavenger hunt exercises and just savor the experience). And I would find other homeschoolers to discuss doubts and difficulties with. Clearly she's not the person to share your fears and trials or give you suggestions for homeschool success. She's more of a hostile audience; I would never share my challenges with her. Every time she tried an assessment, it would be time to leave her presence. Every time she made a positive comment or did something non-schoolish can be an opportunity for praise and more time together. She may be overcompensating for feeling she didn't do the best for her own kids, feeling that her new expertise should serve her family and all that - but it's not her place and it's not the way she wants her grandkids to remember her. Try to keep the focus on helping her figure out how to build positive memories from the kids' point of view.

Actually, CSUs are about $8-10K/year now. And expected to go up 5%/year for the next few years. Sigh.

It's hard to finish in 4 years at most state schools in CA. Five or 6 years is more like it. This is one of the advantages of choosing a private school; you're more likely to get done because they scale classes to majors. This is also why a lot of students do their first 2-3 years at community colleges, which have very standardized transfer agreements with the state schools. You know what you're getting at a CC and you usually get it a LOT cheaper. It's just not the 4-year college experience, but ds has taken his "gap year" as an extra year at CC and has been able to take classes for fun or career possibility that didn't necessarily fit into a given major. He was one of those who was very unsure about his direction when he started anyway. CC has been a good thing.

Someone asked about charters in my area...we're in Sonoma County. Most charters can serve their own county and adjoining counties....and sometimes the counties next to the adjoining county. When we lived in SoCal, this meant that a charter in Temecula could serve LA County. We've been in 4 charters in our homeschooling career, two in SoCal and two in NorCA. I would say the ones in NorCA have been more rigid and state curriculum oriented, but then one of them we've only been in for high school when, as others have said, the hoops get to be really demanding to jump through. The charter we did art and ceramics through was in SoCal, and those classes really were a tremendous benefit. We joined that charter when my husband was laid off twice in one year and I found out I was pregnant...it was a really tough year. Our SoCal charters were set up for independent homeschoolers with occasional enrichment classes. They seemed to at least "get" homeschooling. The NorCA charters we have been in are much more state oriented. The one my younger daughter was in wanted us to use district curricula, do a science project of their choice, and have the ES write my lesson plans for me. NO THANK YOU. The charter we used for high school (Pathways) was necessary because my dd and I had a strained relationship and having an intermediary assign and review the work really helped. I found that their "college prep" component (an on-line chat and additional assignments) was not integrated well with the "basic graduation" assignments. The due dates tended to be identical and the chat format was not a good one for dd. For this kid, we ended up going with the basic diploma and it has been a good decision for her. She meets weekly with a teacher she likes and wants to please; the meeting includes a 1-hour discussion and presentation of written assignments. There are written assignments for every class, including PE and community service. The school has tried to be flexible on electives; this year dd is doing logic from Classical Academic Press, for example, and we got to choose among several history textbooks. Pathways only gives about $800 per high school student and on-campus classes are charged to that, as is rental of state-mandated curricula. Most of their enrichment classes are on-campus (we have a site within a 20 min. drive of us), not vendor sited so there's less chance to choose someone you already like. She was able to take math and science on campus (2 days/week) and enjoyed that. I enjoyed having somebody else teach them and her instructors were fun and creative. BUT, and this is a very big BUT, Common Core is going to affect *everything* and the charters are not all implementing it the same way. Last year my dd in Pathways had to do computer-based testing 4 times (beginning and end of each semester), in addition to beta testing Common Core. Luckily she'd passed the CAHSEE in her sophomore year. And the software they use to generate the assignment list for the month changes every semester. Yuck! Most of the NorCA charters I know are K-8. Pathways is one of the only ones that offer high school. Most of the private schools up here also seem to be just K-8 as well and feed into the public school. There is a catholic high school and a private christian school that does high school but $$$$$$. Anyway, I pulled my younger daughter out of the charter she was in for part of 4th grade and hope to go independent with her thru high school. Hope all this rambling has helped.

Harvey Mudd, in Claremont, CA. My brother majored in physics there, transferring in from Rose-Hulman in Terre Haute, IN. He liked R-H, but hated the winters there and was happier closer to home. Mudd is part of a 5-college consortium with several small LACs and students can pick and choose classes and activities among the schools.

1) K is not mandatory in CA. You don't have to put your kid in school and you can study/do whatever you want. My advice would be to just have fun, practice writing numbers and letters, do basic math/reading skills, and read whatever strikes you/what you want to share with your kid from the library. Don't put on the straitjacket before you have to. Have fun with your kid first. 2) Charter schools can be very different in personality, requirements, funds offered, etc. You need to find which ones serve your county, what they would expect you to do in terms of recordkeeping/samples/meetings/meeting locations, what classes or enrichment they offer and where (is their site a comfortable commute for you), what their funding and borrowing/return policies are, etc. Only some of this can be found out online. If you can find a homeschool group near your home, go hang out with them and see what the ladies there know. 3) I know it can seem like a big payday when you see the funds a charter makes available, but every charter will have restrictions on what you can buy and from whom, what vendors/classes they offer, how detailed their recordkeeping expectations may be, and not just state testing once/year but also placement testing, progress testing, computerized assessments, etc. Many charters now not only require state testing in order to participate the following year, but also require computerized assessments at least twice a year and sometimes more often. Some expect you to hit CC/state objectives for that particular grade level in your monthly recordkeeping. Don't just look at the paycheck; look at what it costs you in terms of time and freedom. We were in one charter that expected us to follow district curriculum and standards as well as participate in an on-campus enrichment day that was geared about 3 grade levels below where my daughter was working...but please don't tell us if you're doing latin or logic, thank you very much. On the other hand, some will order you any grade level you want provided you show your kiddo is working at that level. 4) The money for lessons is nice. That's what we spent the majority of our funds on, and my dd's art lessons were invaluable in helping her qualify for a scholarship to art school. My ds was able to ceramics, which he is still doing very well and for fun at community college. Just count the cost before you sign up.

I think that's Coloma. I forgot to mention vising a couple of the missions. San Rafael & San Francisco would be your closest.

Forgot to include Rod & Staff English from grade 3 up. I'd use Grammar Songs in grade 2. Getty-Dubay Italic Handwriting.

San Francisco has some great museums, including science and art museums in Golden Gate Park...where there are also lots of bike trails. Across the Bay Bridge there's the Bay Model, which models water flow in the whole river drainage/bay area. Point Reyes area has a native american village as well as lovely beaches. Muir Woods. So many, many things. There's a marine museum in Bodega Bay, but only open to the public on Friday afternoons. Sonoma Canopy Tours (ziplines thru the redwoods) - my son works there. Restaurants galore as well, and many wine/food tastings (not so great for younger kids). Coastal hikes. Kayak/canoe on the Russian River is really more of a summer trip since the rivers are flood stage right now & not very safe. Whale watching in Jan/Feb.

When I was @ UC Riverside, they had a French immersion dorm. I spent 5 trimesters in it. Not sure if they do now.

She's going to a very small art college. They have some job listings but not much help with resume prep, etc. While she was here this week we did two resumes for her - one arts related and one general office related. She's going to get a job & salary history/reference page together when she gets home and update her web site. I've talked to her about putting both resumes on monster.com and I will mention linkedin to her as well. She's worked for 4 years doing all the various street art kiosks at Knott's Berry Farm, starting with kiddie handprint art and moving through face painting and caricatures up to pastel portraits from life....and is a shift lead at that job. But it's basically minimum wage plus commission and never full-time except in summer. It's actually the same company that serves both Knotts and D-land and they have to sign a non-competition agreement so she can't go out on her own if she stays in SoCal. If she moved up here, she could freelance all of those things, but not here. She did one internship with a small digital publishing company, six weeks or so in summer. She's applied twice and interviewed to teach art lessons at a company that does after-school classes, but they keep postponing filling the actual position. I think she'd be good at teaching, as she's worked with kids as a 4-H teen and project leader for the last 7 years. Her goal is eventually to illustrate children's books, but for right now she's willing to take a general office job and keep doing the amusement park on weekends. She is so reluctant to network -- sees it as imposing on people. Have to help her get past that. Please keep the suggestions coming!!

Explode the Code, Math U See + Singapore, Spelling Workout. Used Sonlight with all 4 kids in elementary, adding in Story of the World with the last kiddo. Liked Real Science Odyssey for elementary and my kids loved Sonlight's Discover and Do DVDs for science.

My recent college grad (BFA/Illustration) has not gotten much help from her school with job hunting, and the methods and sources for job hunting have changed a LOT since I was last in the job market. What tips can you give us for her job search? Web sites? Resume listings? Networking opportunities? Temporary options? She is in southern CA, if that info is helpful. She has been procrastinating about this...didn't want to look until classes were done, and then not until after New Year's. Now life events are pressuring her and she needs to get moving fast. Ideas much appreciated.

Well, the big hit here was seaweed snacks in various flavors. Luckily no soy, so dd could have them. Socks were the high cost item, and Burt's Bees lip gloss/Blistex for the boys. DH got a package of flavored coffee, and he put some moi in everyone's stocking but mine...his favorite chinese treat.

When I was growing up, the stockings were to tide the kids over until the rest of the family arrived for group gift opening and family dinner. Now, my kids have never had family close enough to do that, but the stockings are what they look forward to on Christmas morning. One year I put in everyone's favorite hot cereal. We had breakfasts for a couple of weeks. DS almost always gets shoe deodorizers. We all appreciate that one, LOL.

LOL - living in a county that has legislated away plastic bags of any kind....so now we have to go BUY poop bags for the dog because we can't recycle the ones from the grocery store anymore. Now I pay $13/pkg to pick up after the dog, instead of doing it for "free". And I have to wash my grocery bags. We moved from Orange County, CA to Sonoma County, CA....yep, there was a bit of culture shock. But our particular reasons for moving out of CA would be mostly economic.

Thanks! At least somebody doesn't think I sound like the Grinch! I almost always end up spending more on stockings for 6 people than on any one gift under the tree. But the tradition stays for now, I guess.

Maybe we need to switch to *them* filling a stocking for mom & dad?????

do kids outgrow christmas stockings? There was a mass protest at our house at the merest thought of setting aside this tradition. My college/teens/tween all STILL want to sleep in our room on Christmas Eve and open their stockings when they wake up. The tradition started when we needed to get them all out of the way in our tiny house so that we could do the christmas stockings. But for older kids, stockings get EXPENSIVE!! So, what do you think? Keep it up until they leave home for good? Until they reach a certain age (????)? What?