I've never heard of it, however a few people at my reception were shocked I was holding my dog because she might get my dress dirty. I was thinking to myself; who cares, the wedding is over, I will never wear this dress again, except MAYBE as a Halloween costume (Frankenstein's Bride) If I have a daughter she will want her own dress, not my old out dated thing I will be having it cleaned/packaged up for storage anyhow and last but not least, my freshly groomed dog is far more important then some silly bit of material. The love at the wedding is more important then the flowers, cake, dress, limo, etc...keep it real and keep the important stuff up front. FAMILY, FRIENDS & LOVE

We will be starting First Language Lessons this year. (1st/2nd) I think it is important to first get reading and writing mastered (or at least the basic phonics mastered) before embarking on the techincal aspects of the language.

@Mommiemilkies I found this while researching http://autism.asu.edu/Additional/Summarybiomed07.pdf not sure if that is exactly what Misty is referring to? @dandelionmom I agree, I think once I'm done with the books covering my nightstand I will be adding "Pretending to be Normal" to my list. :001_smile:

thanks for the Shadow Syndrome Kids label. I'll read up on that. I'd love to know in more detail the bio info too! :)

WOW, that's interesting! Have you made those same diet changes in your daughters? If so, with positive results? Sorry for getting off topic a bit. This thread is so interesting to me. My son has always been from day one "quirky" and I'm pretty sure he fits the Aspie code. But not sure if he's Aspie 'enough' we seem to have good times and not so fun times. He's odd enough to not be normal and normal enough to not be odd. If that makes sense? It's actually not a great place to be. Can't get help and can't fit in either. :( Anyhow, my daughter started showing some quirky behaviors around 4, maybe 3 but I was too focused on our son at that time to notice. :( She was a text book baby. Now that we are out of that crazy baby/toddler phase I am able to try and see both of them in their own light and it's hard to tell if our daughter is learning her quirky from our son or if she is quirky on her own?

Misty - I'm curious because they say BOYS are more likely (which may or may not be the case?) but because you have three daughters that are aspie, and one son, do you see any of those aspie tendancies in your son? and if so, how do they differ from your girls in YOUR experience?

I worry SO MUCH about my oldest, because he is VERY MUCH like my older sister and the dynamics between him and his little sis are similar to my older sis and myself. My mother would look wrong at us, my sister would crumble and I would laugh. If I half way look wrong at my children, the oldest will melt and the youngest will protest. I try VERY HARD to not look cross at my children because of it. Which isn't easy when PMS comes along. :001_huh: I try very hard to have special time with my children one on one, but it seems one wrong look and poof my oldest is under the covers crying. Hard to be a hard shelled mama to a soft shelled child. BUT I KNOW it's the case, so I try VERY HARD to soften up as much as possible! After reading the book 'Be Different' I sat at the table with my children and just smiled a big giant smile at each one to see their reaction. My oldest, was totally unphased, didn't really react, my youngest started to laugh and smile back at me. So I have a feeling that facial expressions get pulled and pushed out of context, proportion, etc with my oldest. I can't control the interpretation of my expressions, which makes it that much harder! I recall having a great time in school. I don't recall problems at all. HOWEVER, looking back on it and raising my children, I wonder how much of it did I ignore, push to the back hidden corners of my memories, block out completely? Because my oldest has confused memories. Everyone was his friend. He always had a good time. IN HIS MEMORY. HOWEVER, he was crying all the time, upset all the time, getting sick from it all the time, telling me he was being bullied, etc. I have watched him in a group of kids, if they don't want to play his game, he's in tears, angry, frustrated, melting down, etc. It's horrible, but that's life, not everyone wants everything to go your way all the time. SOMETIMES you have to do what THEY want. Anyhow, we would come home from a birthday party or something where this type of situation would happen. He cried, saying he was bullied, the kids were mean, etc. Then a couple days later he had the best time at that birthday party, it was so fun, he wishes we could do that every day! I never know what memories will stick with him. He can twist memories into good ones or horrible ones, but rarely does the actual event reflect what his memories of it were. (if that makes sense?) So I recall school being fun and loving it. Yet when I read Aspergirl, I totally see myself. I have a hard time relating to people that hated school. I was crushed when I saw how horrible school was for my son. How could something so fun be so bad? I'm JUST NOW thru my children beginning to realize how two people can have the same experience and it be bad for one and great for another. I am learning a lot from my children on how to relate to other people's differences. I'm sorry that your hubby shut you down when you were ready to express yourself and you had a light bulb of self brighten up. I hope that you are able to share your hurt feelings with him, so he can see how it affected you. (effected? I'm not a grammer wiz) :( I think telling him that you wanted to share with him and he shut you down and hurt your feelings might give him a second chance to do it right. :grouphug: He may be similar to me and not realize how others could have a different experience or feelings towards a similar event. He maybe Aspergers, ha ha! :tongue_smilie:

:grouphug::D:iagree:

I'm reading aspergirl (thanks to this forum) and I sit there finding myself thinking back to my childhood and how this book is TOTALLY me! Then in there somewhere, someone said they did well in a Catholic school because of the structure. I went to Catholic school, maybe that is another reason I flew under the radar? I recall the first year I had in public school the teacher said I was full of 'zest' , whatever that was, I took it as a good thing, but looking back, I wonder what positive spin on a negative thing was being conveyed? I also was put in gifted classes, yet in delayed classes for other subjects. NO ONE seemed to ever think anything was "off" enough to tell me about it. My parents to this day say I was totally normal. They always said things about how perfect I was, how I could do no wrong, etc as a child. (to the fault of crushing my sister's self esteem, because she was different, but who knows maybe more normal?) My parents clearly had those parental blinders on that tell them their child is perfect. As I read Aspergirl, I totally fit that book, minus one major part. The social part. I thought I was social. I never realized I didn't fit in. It wasn't until I had children and had a hard time relating to other parents that my social life dwindled to nearly nothing. I enjoy the lifestyle of a hermit, but I was oblivious as a teen to being a little 'out' of the box. My parents always made sure I had the popular clothes, toys, things, etc. Our house was the FUN house that all the teens wanted to hang out at. (or at least I thought?) When I look back, I had best friend 'periods' I didn't have the same best friend all thru high school. I am still friends with a few childhood friends, but looking back, they are quirky too! ha ha. Aspergirl has opened my eyes to ME being off as well as my hubby. (he's an engineer, enough said, right?) We're quirky. PS I have lots of friends/family that I'd like to give Aspergirl to, but how does one give a book like that without implying that said person is spectrumish!?!?! LOL :001_huh:

I'm not sure what (if any) books there might be at the 6th grade level, but I have recently been AMAZED at how much math and math concepts are absorbed with my son thru math stories. I hear him in the car chatting to himself about various math problems that he comes up with on his own, but I can tell the concepts are stemming from various math stories we read during our reading time. I'm sure there are stories for older children, because some of the ones I've checked out from the library were too advanced for us at this point. Discipline problem, UGH is right! I feel for the kids who have to deal with that all day at school, at least our children have been blessed with the homeschooling option and being taught by someone who loves them and wants to understand them and help them. I find most of these kids with special needs are by far the sweetest kids that try the hardest. It ruffles my feathers BIG TIME when someone is so ignorant to special needs! UGH! Discipline! You hit a nerve! Grrr Want to smack those folks that don't get it! :D

Our local co-op says they are open to all, but in reality they are simply looking for similar families in faith, schooling, parenting styles, etc So if you aren't a perfect fit in all the above areas, within the year you feel their pressure that it's not a good fit and most don't return the following year. I would LOVE to find a co-op that was open to special needs, but we are in a small community and there is only one co-op. Unfortunately there are plenty of people that are 'faking' their ways, so they can stay in the group and have a social outlet for their children. I prefer to be more proactive about making playdates at the park with other homeschooling families then fake who my family is. :iagree: You can feel a sense of belong or not from observation and talking with the group. Watch the actions as much if not more then the words. IMHO. Best of luck, because I hear that if you find a good fit, that co-ops are a life saver for the homeschooling family. I would love to find a group that accepted special need kids.

She maybe be in mourning too when she realizes she has to make that trip to Target with you and she's lost her freedom because of her mistake. And maybe within a few months she'll be ready to try again. I would put a list of yes & nos on the door when you give it another try. If she doesn't like it because it's babyish, then you can say "well you're free to come with me to target" the rules are, this list stays here if you stay here, if the list comes down, you come with me. End of discussion. Be firm. I'm sure it's only a matter of a short while before you'll get another chance to give it a try again. :001_smile:

We are working with 'superflex' and his curriculum (can be purchased at amazon) It does a lot of 'expected and unexpected' behaviors as well. You may like that 'super hero/villian' curriculum if you aren't familiar with it. In the car I keep a basket of 'entertainment' (books, toys, snacks, etc) but I do get the MOST silence when I pop an audio book into the cd player! Sometimes it takes a few minutes (if I don't warn them it's coming) before they are quiet, which drives me nuts, because I feel like we are missing the first part of the story, but it doesn't bother the kids. And if I warn them before hand, I sometimes get protests on it and so it's a shot in the dark on whether or not I mention a story is coming up, sometimes it's just easier to miss alittle bit of the beginning. I choose stories that are several cd's long. Because when we reach our final stop, the stories not over, but they are ready to listen to it again when we get BACK into the car on another day. :bigear: I also allow slightly more mature listening then I would allow for in a DVD movie. The quick audio books (one short brown bear type story) will not hold their attention. It must be a longer tale. And my children love to hear accents (british readers are a favorite) They also typically love anything Jim Weiss narrates. I'm sure you thought of this, but if you have a 3rd row seat you can separate the children a bit more by putting one in the far back. Unless you have car sick issues, that far back seat might cause problems with car sickness? My children get car sick easily so listening to a story allows them to still look out the windows and not focus on a stationary screen. Watching a DVD sometimes leaves me with car sick kids. :iagree: :iagree:

Please give me some ideas of what to research for writing programs. My son has not been formally evaluated for Disgraphia, however, he does several of the things listed for Disgraphia. His writing has not improved since he was 3. He protests writing projects or any school work that involves writing. He will be 7 in the fall, and I feel his writing needs to improve. At this point he will write ON HIS OWN (not a lot) and it's all phonetic, somewhat left to right and somewhat top to bottom. There are no spaces between words, often times there are spaces in the middle of words and a lot of the times half the word is on one line, half on the other line with maybe one or two letters even on a third line. All the letters are different sizes ranging from very large to very small. There are many other issues regarding his writing abilities. I simply feel we must get more serious this coming fall and I'd like to start researching writing programs. He knows all his letters, letter sounds, etc, so when I get 'preschool' level things, he protests because it's for babies. (even though that is the writing level he is at) I wonder if we should skip printing and start with cursive, because my husband had many of these same issues as a child and he gave up on writing before cursive was introduced. As an adult he was curious and tried cursive. He was amazed at how much easier and how much more sense cursive made to him. Maybe this would be the case with my son? I would love to hear your suggestions on writing programs that did or did not work for your child, if your child had struggles with writing. Thank you

I would feel good about it too, because when I was told they saw SOME, but not enough in my son a few years ago, I cried with joy. I felt a hugh relief that I wasn't crazy, that I did see quirks there and I wasn't the only one that saw them. Recently he's had a FULL evaluation and I don't know the results, but in talking they said they saw some things. His speech therapist said she sees some differences. So those things make me feel like my fight is for a purpose. And gives me the strength to keep fighting for him to get what he needs. (Now I am observing my daughter too and noticing a few things that are different, but she seems to be more 'average' then him. So she would fly under the radar, I'm sure. Life is a journey and it's always better when others can relate. :) My son has been pulled out because he drove his teacher nuts (and her him) but he seems amazing and sweet to me. So giving and kind. So smart and curious. It's a parent/child match up. Yes he drives me insane at times, but all kids drive their parents insane at some point in time here and there. We all have different 'quirks' (regardless of Dx) and sometimes those quirks match up and other times they don't match up with a good parent/child fit. My daughter is just like me when I was a kid and just like my husband as an adult. My son is just like him when he was a kid and just like me as an adult. It's an odd thing, but I wouldn't be suprised if we all brushed a little on the spectrum somewhere. ;)

hearing all these 'issues' are helpful. my children, myself, my husband we all have our own 'ways we like things' and who knows maybe we all are a touch more then 'quirky'? :confused: I am a very laided back mama, so my kids can wear the clothes they like. I'm not a big bath pusher, I bathe the kids every few days (or let them take a shower if they would prefer) I TRY to expose the kids to different foods, but as long as the ones they are choosing are healthy & fairly balanced, I'm ok with what they choose to eat. I just don't see a point to some of the obessive parental 'requirements' so maybe my kids would be MORE quirky if they lived in a home with a MORE insistant mother? I work on social skills with them as part of the work we do (aside from math, reading, etc) We practice whole body listening Larry, Superflex villians (curriculum you can buy on amazon) etc. And I can see there are things they don't get. but because I don't find them all that 'off' (I can see their justifications) I'm not forcing it upon them. Then I wonder, if I'm off, then I'm not doing them a service by not making them, or am I doing them a service by allowing them to be who they are most of the time? :001_huh::confused: :001_huh: Long story short, it's nice to hear your stories so I can be aware of them in our own lives and know that maybe my daughter HATES wearing pants of any kind because she doesn't like things on her legs? Maybe my son refuses underwear because he doesn't like the feel? I know there are plenty of texture appearance things with food that twist up my son's mind and freaks him out. I know he suffers from 'bad thoughts' (possible OCD) I know there are quirks. Just not sure if they cross the line into ASP. Thanks for sharing your stories. I just started Aspergirl (the book) last night, so far I totally like it. Thanks for the suggestion! However, it brings up my other quirk, it's BRAND NEW and the library has their hard covering plastic stuff on the cover, which makes opening the pages harder then a nice soft book that has been worn in. I prefer (enjoy more) a book that has easily bendable pages with a soft touch to them. :D Quirky? Probably.

Thank you. I will. :)

Curious to hear more of the differences between girls and boys with ASD. I recently took my son for a formal evaluation and during the entire visit while answering questions and filling out forms, I thought to myself, wow, my daughter does all these things more often then my son. But for some reason my daughter seems more average and struggling less then he does. Would she be identified as different if we didn't homeschool or would she fly under the radar? Curious to hear more of this thread about girls and ASD. Very Interesting. :bigear:

:iagree: I'm curious what the final out come was?

sounds like you got what you needed. Glad to hear she's liking it. My son loves dinosaurs and chess. We play with the old fashion board game at this time, but I might research this dinosaur chess app as an on the go option. :auto:

OFF TOPIC: I'm obviously a newbie jumping right in, but I haven't been able to find a place to introduce myself properly. Please forgive what appears to be bluntness. I would have otherwise slipped into the forum with a touch more grace. :D

WOW...just read all 15 pages and only two are in my general area. :D What ever came of this? How could CA loose homeschooling rights when it seems we are one of the more liberal states when it comes to homeschooling abilities?

Agree with Sibs without Rival book, makes HUGE differences in how we handle sib issues and it's been NIGHT & DAY between mine! Agree you need to talk to the 10 year old, he appears to be just as much at fault. And think not letting your 10 year old see the movie either would help him realize HIS part in all of this. :grouphug: all that said, 30 days does seem a bit harsh. Can you consider a family meeting or a ONE ON ONE heart to heart chat with the younger one to try and understand his reaction? Have him come up with a suitable consquence that you both can live with. I'd wait on the family movie until the entire family can join in. It will make them realize you are a FAMILY that needs to work together, rather then against one another. Side Note: Not saying this is the case in YOUR home, because I clearly have no idea. There is a part in the sib book that reminds me of a good friend: IRL my good friend has a 13 year old son and 9 year old daughter. In the mother's eyes the son is calm, gentle, caring, good student, star athlete, the all around golden child and the daughter is the 'wild one' her 'messy child' 'emotional child', etc so on some level the older boy can do no wrong and the younger one does plenty wrong. She adores her children, but because of this, she doesn't see the massive amounts of tormenting the older one does to the younger one. The daughter lashes out with emotional outbursts and doesn't get help from her mom until it's reached a horrible scene. Her brother is CONSTANTLY ON HER CASE, nagging her, scaring her, teasing her, basically sibling torture. He tells her there are ghosts that live in her bedroom, he creeks at night on the walls of her room, over all just freaks her out all the time. :/ All part of being a sib? She loves her brother? but she gets the bad end of the deal because of her mother's underlining feelings towards them, the names and labels she has given them over the years. I see the junk the older brother does and the mom thinks it's funny, silly, cute, no big deal, but it's mean. I feel for his little sis. :( I'd wanna choke him too! :/ You can always change your mind and come up with a different consequence. I wouldn't let him off the hook completely, but I would consider altering the consequence because 30 days is a LONG TIME and I think a consequence that matches the crime would be better.

My friend's son's speech therapist uses these with him. My friend says she notices it helping her son identify where his tongue,lips, etc should be. If they don't seem to work, hopefully you can get some of your money back by selling them on ebay.

I read this book to my son. This book describes the chess pieces in historical fashion to how they might of moved on the battle field. It gave a purpose for the moves that helped each players moves stick in his mind. He LOVES to play chess. For Christmas he was given Solitaire Chess and he loves that as well. http://www.amazon.com/Kids-Book-Chess-Set/dp/0894807676/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1325948612&sr=8-9 http://www.amazon.com/Think-Fun-3400-ThinkFun-Solitaire/dp/B0032UKQFO/ref=sr_1_cc_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1325948775&sr=1-1-catcorr Sorry this does not answer your app question. However, I haven't seen a book that describes the pieces and their moves as well as this one does, so I felt you may want to know about it. You may find it at your local library.