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FloridaLisa

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Everything posted by FloridaLisa

  1. Others have said it but usually Less is more. "I'm so sorry for your loss." If you're friend/daughter/dad has been affected, "Are you okay? ::pause to really listen:: Some people ask that but don't stop to listen to an answer. It's okay and good to say the deceased's name. "I"m so sorry. I know [John, Susan] was so well loved." Hugs are great if appropriate. Caring shows up in mannerisms and attention given to the one who is grieving. You're a good friend to think of this before-hand. I know before death hit us so close to home, I just had no experience but I so appreciated those who were caring, loving and spoke an "I love you" with a hug. <---- That is sometimes the best thing.
  2. know the passwords and answers to all the security questions know where the keys are to important things -- the lockbox, the safe, the gun cabinet know where all the important papers are filed life insurance is the best gift you can ever give your spouse. It's worth giving for every birthday, Christmas and anniversary if need be. talk about whether your spouse would want burial or cremation. Talk about where s/he would want to be buried. make sure you or a trust for you and your children are named as beneficiaries for important accounts. do not amass debt. Debt piles on problems when there is a divorce or death while no debt allows some margin after a major transition. have an emergency savings account of at least 3 months living expenses.
  3. When our kids were babies and little, we had very little intentional time together. I think those were our marriage endured the most stress in those years, but also because of lean finances, learning to live together, job stresses. When ds was old enough to babysit, we had a set date night. It was awesome Best thing we ever did. I looked forward to getting out of the house and having adult conversation, he looked forward to . . . me. :) But we never had anywhere near 15 hours of intentional time together. He traveled for work, we had 7 kids that were busy with activities, we had other friends we wanted to get together with, a house to manage. I think 15 hours of undivided, intentional time would be on the extreme end of marriages that I know of (my family and friends).
  4. I just made these granola bars last week. They're okay, but you have to boil the peanut butter and roast the nuts and then cook the bars and it just tastes too roasted. I liked the simpler, older recipe that Super Healthy Kids used to have, but they don't have the old granola bar recipe I had bookmarked for years. Do you have a link to a favorite recipe? Thanks!
  5. So good to see you here Jean! And good to here about your son -- congratulations! I affirm so much of what you said. I just graduated our fourth son and that perspective is so helpful as I continue with my other 3. Blessings to you!
  6. I'm so very sorry. I would also get a lawyer. A good lawyer who is not nasty but who has a reputation for advocating well for his/her clients. I am 100% pro-marriage but I also know from walking through this with friends that if he pursues divorce with no hope of reconciliation, you need to not *try to be who he wants you to be* through this and you need to protect your children and you. I would also reach out to someone -- family member or support group (Divorce Care maybe?) -- because the grief and non-functioning makes it hard to make objective decisions. Which you will now have to make on your own if he continues down this path. Hope is not lost. I know of two marriages very, very close to me that were right where yours is but both marriages made it through stronger than ever. It's a beautiful thing to see. There is much heartbreak though in the process. I'll pray for you both.
  7. Thanks for the heads up! I'm going to search any in our area. Maybe you could link up to a Groupon special if they do affiliates? ;)
  8. Commenting so I can keep up with this as well when y'all find out some information.
  9. We started homeschooling in 1999 and that year I read the first edition of TWTM. I think I found the forums pretty shortly thereafter . . . maybe fall 2000? I had an excellent local support group and many in my community were already beginning to classically home educate and start a classical school so I also had a solid IRL group to share resources, books, classes and ideas with. But a few years in, I realized this board gave so much more breadth and depth to all things homeschool. Well, all things life. I found favorite recipes, learned about making yogurt in my crock pot and all kinds of life hacks while forming some relationships. It's been a great forum!
  10. Dearest eaglei, I am heartbroken. I came on specifically to get an update on your son. I am so very sorry for such a great loss. May God, His word and His presence comfort you and your family. I have marked every Thursday to lift you and your family in prayer. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :crying: Lisa
  11. Oh I'm not even going to sell! Good for you! That would mean needing to put it in a corner of my room and it needs to go! But I hear you, Sahamamama, It brings me back to the days as well! Those hand-lettered notes. :001_wub: That's to prove that they really did think we were amazing people at one time!
  12. We had stacks of fun PC games but those were thrifted away years ago. My kids loved one about a rollercoaster where you made a theme park and put people in it doing things? Kind of like Sim City. I hold onto things way too long. I *just* gave away my 2 geosafari with stacks of themed cards. I was so proud of the collection we had amassed!
  13. This is the first one that came to mind. I am halfway threatening but getting more serious about selling our house when my 16 year old graduates in 2 years, travel the US and Canada for 6 months and then settle back down with my younger two. It would be such a leap for me as I've always felt to tied (in a good way) with my children. But now as a single mom and doing some work from home, I just might make it work. Keep us updated on your planning and travels!
  14. We often have breakfast for dinner which I consider fairly low key. If I'm working, we now and again have a fend-for-yourself leftover night and the olders help the youngers if needed. And very regularly we have cereal for dinner on Sunday nights because we have a hot Sunday lunch after church.
  15. That's a good idea LoriD. I'd love someone to use it! I actually did keep our world history Teaching Company VHS tapes b/c we have a small tv and I'm bound and determined that ds16 will watch those in the near future. It's the kind of tv with the VHS built in and I got it so that my younger two could watch our stash of movies. Remember the days when Disney released one a year for a limited time? As fun as collecting Teenie Beanie Babies in the happy meals. :D I didn't even know about that! This math drill was I think one of our first techie products. I still have the spiral bound Calculadders. I can see we 3 get the value of these things!
  16. I'm cleaning out one of my closets today and oh goodness! I'm having to throw away (well, I'll give it to my local thrift store) so much obsolete homeschool stuff. Good curriculum that we loved but that doesn't work on our newer laptops or the Mac. Calvert spelling CDs, Wiggle Woods, Vroot and Vroom,Teaching Company on VHS, Mr. Aardsma math drill (if you remember that one you've been at this a while!). :crying: It made me so appreciative of the books on my shelves that have been read and re-read, handed down from older to younger sibling. I'm happy about the technology but boy do I hate that it has a short life. Anyone else cleaning out, rearranging, updating book shelves, art closets, supply drawers?
  17. I make this version and keep it refrigerated for several hours or even overnight and it's delicious! I prefer the chessmen cookies and I like way they hold up.
  18. Anything dark chocolate for the win. <3
  19. As to your question, I suspect that homeschooling helped us navigate the high school years with less difficulty than we might have had if they were in public or private school. It's reasonable speculation. The biggest factor is the family culture. The second biggest factor is outside influence which comes between a parent child relationship. There is conflict in growing up and homeschooling doesn't eliminate that. It can be worse sometimes to have to be the heavy for school and life. But, I was happy to avoid some influences and pulls. All in all, (so far) we've had good kids and a good relationship with them. But there have still been plenty of nights that I went to bed bewildered, heart-sick, worried. Same as the toddler years -- even with good parenting and good kids there are HARD days. Two books I highly recommend you read as your kids approach the teen years. They will mean less now, but you will nod your head in agreement in a few years. *How to Hold Onto Your Kids, Why Parents Need to Matter More than Peers, Gordon Neufeld (recommended here) *Age of Opportunity, A Biblical Guide to Parenting Your Teens, Paul David Tripp
  20. Loved her books and I was so inspired by her no-nonsense, high expectations and *meat* not milk way of teaching kids. If only more teachers could be free from regulations and bureaucracy and so much extra and be free to teach!
  21. Oh yes! Don't forget Kisses for Katie, an adorable book about a just-graduated high school girl who falls in love with Uganda and settles down permanently. I was blown away by her wisdom beyond her years and her flat-out obedience and courage.
  22. Peace Child talks pretty explicitly tells about the tribe's revenge killings and cannibalism. It's not graphic but completely part of the narrative and a thread to how the missionaries are able to communicate the gospel. I liked Bruchko and my kids all liked it as well. These are my go-to missionary books for this age. They're pretty well written. Here are others that we've enjoyed: A Question of Yams Catching Their Talk in a Box And the Word Came with Power It's a Jungle Out There, Ron Snell For Middle and High School: Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret (really a biography and compilation from his journals) by his son Dr. and Mrs. Howard Taylor The Autobiography of George Mueller (not a missionary per se but amazing man of faith who supported several orphan homes; I re-read this one every few years) A Chance to Die (about Amy Carmichael by Elizabeth Elliot) Through Gates of Splendor and Shadow of the Almighty (by Elizabeth Elliot) God's Smuggler (an all-time favorite) Heavenly Man (not a missionary book although there is a tie-in to missions but an excellent book about Christianity under China persecution in the late 20th century) ETA: I re-read your post, so I'm going to add books about martyrs or hard stuff. The Insanity of God by Nik Ripken. What a faith-building read about persecution in the church today. Nik continues to do a lot of research and work with the persecuted church across denomination. In the Presence of My Enemies (about missionaries captured by rebels) The Hiding Place, Corrie Ten Boom (my father-in-law came to know Christ in her halfway house after WWII but it's a must-read anyway!) Tortured for Christ, Richard Wurmbrand (a pretty short book; I didn't care for the writing style but it's considered a classic) I really enjoyed a biography on Mother Teresa. I'm not Catholic, but I wanted to know more about this little women and her ministry. It was fascinating.
  23. I've seen the trailer for Inside Out and while the idea of the movie is intriguing, it's not a movie I've been waiting for release. But it's summer. And, I don't know, maybe it spurs some good conversations about emotions? And what to do with them? If you've seen it, would you recommend it? Any problem areas? Any parents dying? :( Is it good enough to pay full price or is it a Red Box rental? Thanks!
  24. Continuing to pray right now for your son and for you and your family. :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:
  25. One of our favorites back in the day! I don't think my youngers have seen this so I'm glad to be reminded of it. Is it on Amazon streaming?
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