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Everything posted by Splash1

  1. Thank you so much for all your help. I have passed along all your recommendations. She is busy making copies, etc. She isn't emailing him back. I have given her names of two lawyers to contact Monday. He is trying to backtrack and say he never wanted a divorce, she misunderstood and oh, tear up the first letter, but she needs to do this, this, this, ....... but it's up to her. First contact said he was leaving and wanted joint custody. Any way. I really appreciate all the help.
  2. 21 years and he isn't happy. He moved all but 4k to business account. Should she move money before he changes passwords
  3. Help, friend just called and said husband left her. She is blindsided, no idea. Kids are 14-18yrs old. Just left her a letter and left for the weekend. She needs quick advice on how to protect herself. She was stay at home mom but just recently went back to work for school district as secretary so they'd have insurance, almost all her salary pays insurance. What does she need to do? Most of the money is in his business not their family account. I'd appreciate all the pointers you can give me.
  4. I have a huge island that I chose in my open concept house. I never watched HGTV as we didn't ever have cable or satellite tv. It is basically the size of an uncut piece of granite about 4ft by 9ft. I have a prep sink on it toward the end by the stove and refrigerator and we can seat four on one side and end on bar stools. I did it so I could cook and do projects with the kids when we were homeschooling and now that they are middle school and up and attending school it is still used all the time for homework, snacks, lunch, etc. Sometimes it's a pain to keep neat but I like having a space to work while the kids can do their school work. I also purposely made the kitchen big enough the family could work together to get the meal on the table and then cleaned up. My kitchen has been in constant use for the last 14 years. I do see a time when we're empty nesters that it won't be as wonderful but I'm thankful for it now. ( we built our house, whole family affair plus grandparents 14 years ago when kids were 3,5,6,9 and not born yet.) I can see why this wouldn't be for everyone but with a big family and constant friends over it was nice to have the extra space.
  5. No idea about the allergies but I've had Russian Blues in the past and loved them. They were awesome hunters and brought me gifts often.
  6. We were high school sweethearts who started dating at 17, our senior year. I went to state university and he stayed behind and went to community college. After two years we decided that we'd go to college together and I'd transfer to whatever college he got a track scholarship. However, he wanted to run with at a pac10 school so he managed to get a scholarship at the university I attended already. We never did the "pinned" thing though we were both in the greek system but we did do the candle passing/engagement part. He also asked my dad permission to marry me. We were 21 at engagement and married at 22. I'm a pretty private person and didn't tell anyone ahead of time but I'm sure our families and probably most of my sorority knew ahead of time just not exactly when that would happen since we stayed together that entire time without any drama. We've been married 32 years this September. I expect with my five kids we'll have a large variety in the way we learn about engagements. For awhile it looked like son #2 was heading to early engagement and marriage but then he broke it off with her and now none of the kids are in any type of a relationship so time will tell. I don't have any expectations of them telling us ahead of time though I'd hope I would know about marriage/weddings. Kimberly
  7. I think it would depend on how good a student she is and schools policy for missing classes. I'm old but when I went to college 1983-1987 i missed the first week of Spring semester every single year for the very important family spring break to visit grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. My parents took off two weeks every spring break. It never occurred to me that I couldn't do that as well. Some years it was harder than others to get up to speed but for the most part I did fine. I just had to hit the ground running. Sometimes I'd have friends pick up a syllabus for me so I could do all the reading on the weekend before I went to class. Not saying this was a mature, responsible choice, just that it was possible to do this and still succeed.
  8. Both my husband and I were part of the Greek system on campus. It was one of my best decisions and added so much to my college experience. For me it provided a smaller group of people to get to know, organized activities and fun events, ways to give back, etc. I went to a large state university and didn't join my first year there. I was overwhelmed by the size and couldn't seem to find a way integrate into the system (shy, introvert that likes to be busy and socialize). It was just really overwhelming for me and I wasn't making close friendships (again I'm sure on me, I'm very reserved). Being apart of a Sorority gave me the smaller group of girls to live with, bond with and have fun with. I was not a party girl, didn't ever drink (very popular designated driver) and that was not a problem. No hazing went on. I worked hard to get top grades since the house only had four parking spaces and top grades got those, otherwise you parked down the street wherever you could find. Dh went through at the same time and also had a good experience. He was also a college athlete so he already had team members but still says it was our best decision and made it so much more fun. (he did not party at all, always about keeping his body in peak condition, 400 runner on a track scholarship he couldn't afford to lose) My brother on the other hand flunked out of two colleges (where he pledged twice and never became a member because he couldn't make grades) Third college/fraternity was a charm (that and some maturity). He also now has a master's so as you see he finally figured out the whole school thing. Not Fraternity's fault, my brother just hadn't learned how to manage life yet. (ADHD) It wasn't that expensive from what I can remember, our house had a lot of girls who had to work and earn their own living expenses, etc. I think it really depends on the college and the kid.
  9. I'd stay put for awhile but probably not forever. We have 10 acres and a 6 bedroom 5 bath house which is wonderful for a family of 7 but as the kids are growing up and moving out it would be too much for just me. We also currently have 12 cows, they would definitely go. Two might be okay but 12, just no. When we built this house we did plan for our old age. Master bedroom and everything else we'd need is on main floor, we would actually never have to go upstairs if we didn't want to so we can stay if we want. Kids think I should stay here forever since we all physically contributed to building the house and this is where they all grew up, but honestly the house is going to feel huge this fall when we only have two kids left at home with one or two others just coming home on school vacation and our oldest moved out almost two years ago. I tell the kids that someday we might downsize to something smaller and easier to manage. If dh isn't with me I'd like a smaller house on a large lot. Dh loves acerage and his cows so smaller house is probably in future but don't know about less land. Hopefully I won't be faced with this decision and dh will continue to be with me for many, many more years.
  10. I'm so sorry. I will pray for you all. Just an idea, my daughter ended up in hospital with kidney failure, pancreatitis, as well as other organs beginning to fail and she was diagnosed with atypical hemolytic uremic syndrome. It is ultra rare so took a bit to get diagnosed but now on her medication she's doing well. https://www.ahus.org/diagnosis/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5056489/
  11. I fell into monkey bars when I was 10 and broke my front tooth. I had a root canal then and they built up the tooth using the filling material. It looked good and was strong until well into my thirties. I had it capped in my 40s and it is still fine. (I was supposed to cap it at 21 but dentist just kept an eye on it for me). I have had a root canal that went bad in back. It ended up infected and had to be removed and I now have an implant in that spot. That root canal was from when I was 12 and failed when I was 50. I've had them done by both my regular dentist and an endodontist both have gone well. Hope everything goes well. It is so painful, I'm sorry she has to go through that.
  12. My daughter is taking a rice maker, electric kettle, microwavable bowls and plates. small cutting board and knife, fork spoon. Not much else. We're just going to put a bit of $ in her account so she can shop for whatever else she needs. Also we know with Amazon pirme she can have pretty much anything within 2 days. We're on the minimalist side of things, we'd rather make do than have way too much stuff. Kimberly
  13. We live on ten acres at the very edge of town so closest anything is 4.6 miles away. That means school and grocery store. Everything else is further. I do a lot of driving, I've basically lived and done school in my car for the past ten years. Sometimes I hate all the driving but I like the driving more than I'd like living more conveniently. Driving is a life skill we teach and the kids don't really have a choice. We also have them get their own cars and take over a lot of their own driving by the time they are 16-17yrs old. I wish there was a more viable option of public transportation available but before they can drive my kids that are more independent and want to do things I'm unwilling to drive them to often rode their bikes, as much as ten to fifteen miles. It's just about choices. I will say other kids and adults are amazed that my kids rode their bikes everywhere.
  14. Abilify is known to cause weight gain
  15. When my daughter had an allergy to dairy it didn't matter if it was cow or goat. Proteins are similar and you can get a reaction from it touching her skin. When daughter was still in diapers she had an egg allergy. I was baking and had cracked eggs and gotten a little on my hands, she needed something so I quickly wiped my hands (didn't wash) and picked her up. She had hives on her skin where I touched her from that little bit so if truly an allergy to dairy I would be careful. During that time I also couldn't boil eggs in the house or she'd have a reaction. good resource if she does have food allergies is http://www.kidswithfoodallergies.org/ I learned so much from them when dd was little.
  16. I have idea how to get my old name back and messages. Not sure how I got his name. When I try to change name it says already taken. I know it's me.
  17. My daughter now 16 has had eczema her whole life. It comes and goes. Her current regime that seems to work is daily when not in a flare she bathes, not too hot, , uses a mild soap (either cetaphil or dove) and pats dry and applies Vanicream liberally and Elidel on face and neck. If she's in a flare she uses Clobetasol cream on her face and Triamcinolone Acetonide cream on areas that are bad with a layer of vanicream all over. These two are prescriptions and the clobetasol is expensive so ask for samples. This so far has been the best regimen. She's a food allergy, environmental allergy kid but even when all offending foods are out of her system she flares, Stress is a big trigger for her. Her doctor told her it would be life long so having two different plans would be best way to keep under control.. Not sure what is okay for an infant though we have used Elidel since she was two
  18. I've never posted here before but thought I would answer you. I have attended Diane Craft's seminars and found them interesting and agreed with a lot she said so I made an appointment for my dd when she was 6 almost 7. Evaluation was helpful as she was the first to comfirm my dh and my concerns were valid about dd. She gave me a program to use with dd at home as well as some pointers for ds who also struggles. We did the suppliments and various things she recommended. It did help but we got from not reading at all to just cvc words and couldn't progress any farther. Ds is still dysgraphic and after a year doing the figure 8 exercise is better but no miracle. We definately hit another wall with dd and were not moving ahead at all. Last year dd was 8 and we had an educational therapist who specializes in dyslexia test dd. At this point she tested in the 1% for her age. This is after 18 months of working very hard on everything we'd received from Diane Craft. With her tutor she attends once a week. She has made great progress and actually sees words and attempts to read them (and actually can most of the time) this is huge. Before she didn't even seem to see words around her and recognise them as such. Even family members who haven't seen her in awhile comment on how much progress they are noticing. Tutor uses some of the methods that Diane Craft uses but has a much larger toolbox of ideas and tricks. My dd still has a long way to go before she is at grade level but we are hopeful and so is she. Long story to say, we were not overly impressed by Diane Crafts products. I think her heart is in the right place but if your child truly has a LD then what she has to offer will only get you so far. We have found the personalized tutoring to be far superior and worth the time and money. Just our experience Kimberly
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