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HRAAB

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Everything posted by HRAAB

  1. We always spend the 4th with my dh's family. It's a huge family reunion. We start off with our own parade in fil's old, restored cars in memory of him. We eat, talk, laugh, eat some more, and in the evening have our own firework show. In 31 years of marriage, I've only missed one time, and that was because I was very pregnant and the temp was 100. It's always a good, full day. So glad it only comes once a year.
  2. Cheese is one of my of very few luxury items. I eat it sparingly, but I buy good cheese.
  3. I can't remember where I left off, but I think it's been several weeks so hopefully I'm not repeating something. I finished the last two books in Miss Reads' Fairacre series, Changes at Fairacre and Farewell to Fairacre. I know the issue of domestic violence has come up in a couple of the earlier ones, but this time the cavalier attitude towards it really struck me: such as, why bother the police since they have much more serious issues to attend to. I can usually chalk that attitude up to the time period when the book was written, but these I believe were written in the early 90s. Still, I love anything situated in an English village centered around the local parish and all those interesting village characters. I read Wintersmith and am a huge fan of Tiffany Aching. After that pulled North from Rome by Helen MacInnes off the shelf and was occupied for a few days. Dh and I spent a week on the Oregon coast with our dd and her dh. I packed a bag with books and made sure I had new reading material on my Kindle. Normally it's a time for me to lay back and read without interruption, but I found it hard to get interested in anything. I tried both The Light Fantastic and Life, The Universe and Everything, but just couldn't get past the first few pages. Just way too quirky for me right now. Simon Brett's latest Fethering book is out, The Killing in the Cafe. It felt slow and boring without much going on, but I did finish it. I also had another mystery, The Chinese Shawl. Murder and English manor houses go together so well. My dd gave me Fire and Hemlock by Diana Wynne Jones; she knows me so well. Right now I'm reading A Farewell to Arms, which I'm really enjoying, and another Helen MacInnes book, The Hidden Target. I'm on page 25, and so far, so good.
  4. A not too vivid sex scene that fits in with the plot is okay. Gratuitous sex scenes that make me feel like I've got my nose pressed up against my neighbor's bedroom window - no thanks. I like sex just fine and have a rather healthy appetite for it, but I don't need those pictures in my mind. I have very little tolerance for violence, especially sexual violence or violence towards children. I can watch older war movies or something like LOTR, but the type of violence in most movies today, I cannot do. It is so vivid and real it makes me physically ill. And the movies with young people killing other young people, absolutely not. I went to see Divergent with my dd, and I ended up going to the bathroom several times. There was no way I would watch the Hunger Games. In fact, I won't read the book, either, although it's easier for me overlook the words as opposed to the visuals. Language is last on my list, but movies that have profanities in what seems like every other line I end up blocking out the entire movie. They lose me. If I'm home, I'll probably turn it off unless it's a good, worthwhile movie. But ones that seem to throw swearing in for the sake of swearing, I just don't get.
  5. We don't have cable, Netflix, or whatever everyone else has according to my girls, and after reading about these shows, I'm glad. PBS keeps me occupied. I happily rewatched Curtain last night. I wouldn't mind having easy access to old movies and TV series, but the rest of it I can live without. I'm another one that can't forget visual images.
  6. I just read about this tragedy. This is so sad.
  7. Frozen pizza. Saturday is my day off from kitchen duty.
  8. I wouldn't go so far as to say willingly, but they do it without a fight. Because that's the way it is. I have one dd finishing up math and Latin. Had she kept on top of it during the year, she would not be doing it now. It's only a couple hours in the morning.
  9. Sometimes we do a meal entirely of corn on the cob. All of us, except dh, love Mexican corn. Grill the corn, spread with mayonnaise, cotija cheese, and Tajin Mexican seasoning. YUM!!!
  10. This is exactly where I was coming from. Warnings are good, and all parents at times could probably use friendly reminders. At this time where I've read so much parent blaming, it was just one too many. I've known a couple of families that lost children due to accidents, and the guilt they already felt didn't need any help. I know Lanny meant well.
  11. I remember sitting down to take a breather and waking up with a kid screaming bloody murder. One time I was sitting on the floor folding clothes, and I feel asleep in a pile of warm towels. The girls had dumped a jar strawberry jam on the floor by the time I woke up. So glad it was just jam. Then there was the time I was taking care of the baby, and my older one got out of the house. I found her sitting under a tree by the road. Thank God she didn't wander into the road. (My dh started on a fence the next weekend). Those are just a few times off the top of my head. Nothing bad happened, but it very easily could have. I am/was a vigilant mother. I worried about them and tried to take every safety precaution I could think of. Even so it's so easy for a mom to doze off, get distracted with another child, turn away for a second. Even with the most vigilant parenting, life is a risk. Most parents are doing their very best. Accident happen. Those poor parents. My heart breaks for them. Of course, a warning is helpful. I just don't want to heap more blame on parents that are already suffering from unbelievable grief.
  12. First off, all we're able to do is help out. They rest is from scholarships, aid, and the student working. For the money we've put aside we expect them to keep their grades up, which looks different for each kid. Basically, we want to see that they're applying themselves to the best of their ability. No partying. Absolutely no alcohol or drugs. If grades are suffering due to a relationship, we would talk with them and try to work it out. If the bf were an undesirable person, that would be yet another conversation. As to jobs, their first responsibility is to school. I prefer they don't work during their first semester, at least, until they get a feel for college and the homework required. My older two both had jobs the entire time they were in college, and I think they were pulled too thin. My next dd didn't start working until her 2nd semester, and she's been able to maintain her GPA. We do expect them to work during the summer; of course, finding jobs isn't always that easy. Generally, we expect them to be responsible and work hard. We wouldn't pull funding without a warning or two.
  13. The female singer (name???) that was shot, the little boy killed by the crocodile, and the nightclub shooting. eta: Christina Grimmie (I had never heard of her). I guess it was an alligator that attacked the little boy. It's just all so sad. I'm overloaded with news this week.
  14. We've pretty much shared events with our children, except for when they were very young. I remember watching the news on 9/11 with my older girls; they were 9 and 12 at the time. We have always talked about the news as a family. The only thing I can think I probably kept from them until they were older - 12+ - was crimes against children although they were aware in a general way because we talked a lot about safety. Honestly, I wouldn't know how to keep big news items from them as we do have TVs, visit friends/family, read headlines while at the grocery store, and such. I would rather they hear about horrific events from us rather than from their friends or the TV.
  15. We pay as needed out of the funds we have set aside. However, my bil gave his son all the money he had set aside for his college, $50,000, and said, "here you are, be smart, it's all I have for you". I have no idea how much college ended up costing him plus his living expenses, but he did it and was successful. I would never do that, not even with $5,000, but depending on the kid, it appears it can work.
  16. My oldest dd sent me a video of my 10 mo old granddaughter walking around the living room. Then she stopped, waved at me (phone),and clapped for herself. Made my heart soar. For a few moments I could almost believe everything was okay in the world.
  17. By the time February rolls around, I'm dreaming of that first plate of fresh, sliced tomatoes straight from the garden. Fresh tomatoes and cucumbers are on the table for almost every dinner. Creamed red potatoes with peas. Fresh green beans. My mouth is watering.
  18. My garden is half the size it was when all my girls were home. I keep thinking I'll just have a few tomatoes and cukes, and before I know it, it has tripled. We enjoy gardening, eating the fresh produce, and it is cheap therapy for my dh. His heaven is working outside. tomato plants (18 I think) hot and sweet peppers (20+) 4 cucumbers 2 watermelon 2 cantaloupe potatoes beets carrots radishes lettuces spinach green beans peas No squash this year. Thankfully I know people who love to get fresh produce. It's enjoyable for us, healthy, and relatively cheap.
  19. I love being a home school parent. I believe it has been one of the most important decisions I (we) ever made, and that decision has been instrumental in forming the relationships I have with my children. Of course, had my children gone to school, I can't say what our relationships would look like or that they wouldn't be good, but I do think they would be different. I feel so lucky, fortunate, blessed that I've been able to do this. And fortunately, my girls all feel the same way. I do have one ...regret... can't think of the exact word to use as I do not regret my decision. That is the lack of income, and that I cannot expect to earn much after being out of the workforce for 21 years. Honestly, this is the only negative feeling I have about my decision, and that is because financial security is slipping away due to economic downturn, numerous layoffs/outsourcing for my dh, rising prices, healthcare, and stagnant/decreasing pay in my dh's field, plus the fact that retirement age is not very far off for us. When I made the decision to stay home, I couldn't have seen the way things have turned out. We were on a good course. Then everything went to hell. It will be okay, but there has been a financial price to pay for this decision. Still, I would make the same decision again as would my dh. I can't think of anywhere else I could go where I could spend my time with my very favorite people while doing what I love. When we made this decision we believed we putting the most important part of our life first, our family, and whatever we did give up has been small overall compared to what we have gained.
  20. I like to think that, but I'm not so sure after listening to the tone of many of our political leaders.
  21. People! I like to think most people don't 'think' before they speak. If they did, they would realize how horribly cruel, vicious, mean, and plain nasty their words are. My mother-in-law was one time accused of being selfish for having a large family. Among other things. There is no end to what people will say. I am so sorry. eta: typo
  22. We have a large rubbermaid type box by our back door where all shoes (excepting muddy, mucky, chicken poopy ones) go. We don't normally use our front door. Irrigation boots, muddy flip flops, gardening clogs stay outside by the backdoor in a box. Dh keeps his irrigation boots in the garage; he has these big clips on the wall and hangs his boots on those. Those shoes are NOT allowed in my house. We always knock the shoes against the side of the house in case there's a bug inside. I hadn't given much thought to black widows. Now I think I'll be extra careful as we do have those around outside sometimes. If the shoes are outside, I don't know how to insure they never get bugs in them Mainly, I just try to keep shoes (outside of Sunday shoes) contained in boxes by the door. In my dream home, I have a mud room/bathroom type place accessible to the outside so dirty clothes/shoes could be left there, shook out, hosed off, before bringing them to the utility room and people wouldn't have to walk through the kitchen, dining room, down the hallway to get to the bathroom.
  23. In our case it has nothing to do with trying to force out children out (we love having them home), or controlling them (they would laugh at that), or that we are destitute and can't afford to have them under our roof. It does have everything to do with our desire to raise responsible citizens. We believe that everyone in the family works together, based on their ability, to keep the house running; that includes not just money but pitching in to help when needed, keeping the house picked up, etc. Financial contributions only happen if they are living at home when they are out of school and working full-time. For our girls, it is perfectly normal. It's not something I've discussed with other parents, so I can't say if we are the norm or outside of it. Both dh and I were raised the same way.
  24. When my adult dd moved back home, was employed, and not attending school, she contributed to the household expenses. You could call it rent or living expenses. She knew if she wasn't attending school, was working and able to do so, she would be expected to contribute. We have never asked our girls to contribute if they were attending school and living at home, but otherwise, yes, it is expected.
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