Two of the country singers on the show Nashville are from Australia I believe. I was so surprised.

I am trying to look at it that way. This house I loved but it really is a mess. I don't mind my schedule too much cause I can be with the kids in the day but I just find what I do to be particularly stressful. I can't imagine with my slim work experience being able to do anything else. No day shift since I am the newby and those are taken by the other techs.

I typed a long response that seems to have disappeared. I may take you up on the offer to PM cause this sucks!

I guess it helps to know it isn't uncommon.

I just don't think they will. He was difficult to live with so our relationship has been better with him gone. I wish I could rely on him but he was acting like he was taking care of me and acting stressed by it before he left. He doesn't believe I should keep homeschooling either. He liked that he homeschooled but he thinks I don't have that option anymore so I am really on my own in this.

Sheesh! Lawyer called me back and I have an appt next week for her hourly wage but how the heck do people pay the retainer? I really think I need her to get me through this fairly but I make so little money how do I pay? I'm going to need so many jobs to get through this.

The % is really low. I just can't afford the taxes, homeowners insurance and all other household expensives and the mortgage. I doubt I can even afford rent. I have to see how much the courts make him pay.

Thank You. I know there are others on this board but when faced with how to work enough this is a hard choice. But like I said the field I went into isn't a 9-5 anyway so this is a better option scheduling wise for me.

The funny or not so funny thing is I literally own nothing of value. So many things are broken and falling apart. So most of my decluttering will be junk pile or donate. The only thing of value to me are my books and my pictures. I should have joined in on the vent thread because everything I own is broken. My house will have to sell as a fixer upper cause some many things are beyond my ability to even repair. But it will help me feel more controlled if I start packing things up and throwing things away.

I am starting today to get rid of any unnecessary stuff so it will be easier to move. How do I do it though? This is the only home two of my children ever lived in. I've been here 16 years. Just hurts...

Oldest lives with his fiance (so young....I know) and signed a lease at the apt or else I would definitely ask him to come back. I actually just finally blocked my mom from my cell phone. I have told her so many times to stop harping on me and be supportive or else I won't be speaking with her. So I'm not.

Thanks FaithManor.....Oldest is 19 now and unfortunately already moved out and is struggling himself. They really do work a lot on their own and we do use Khan. I am struggling with hating my job and just not being home with them like I used to be. I am one of those people that when faced with a crowd can chat people up and be very social but it takes all my energy so I crash the next day. Well my job is so much customer service that on my day off I am useless and mostly nap. I am trying not to worry to far ahead but it's so hard.

Ok folks....I made a mistake waiting this long to file but I have called the lawyer and am hoping to get to see her asap with the paperwork she gave me a year ago. It looks like now I will have to sell my home and I am just so scared about where I will live and how I will survive. I need to keep homeschooling for me as much as them. My job is nights and weekends anyway so I wouldn't ever see them if I put them in school. I am struggling with a new job that is so stressful. And I only get 25 hours a week...more than that was frying me but I see now I have no more choices for money. I just need inspiration because I am already taking a beating from my facebook and my mother especially who hates that I homeschool and is just beating me down on what she would do in my situation. So this is kind of a JAWM post and I just need some prayer and good thoughts my way cause I'm losing it here. I only held off to keep my health insurance but I should have filed a year ago and you all told me that. Can't change it now. How do I survive working so much and honeschooling. My kids are awesome and work a lot on their own. I am just chronically tired from all my asthma and allergies.

This was mentioned in another long thread on PF and I have been very pleased with it. Foot Rocker Although not a cure it has made it possible to stretch my calf more than I was able to and my foot as well. I've done many of the other suggestions and this is the easiest for me to fit into my schedule.

I can see that. Unfortunately the kids have Nooks and I prefer to buy all my books on the Kindle so I have to convert them anyway. I have a Nook but I have always much preferred my Kindle.

I just put all my books in Calibre and side load the kids nook/kindle. I just don't have internet access for theirs but do for mine.

In my son's case he applied online everywhere but you also go into those places in person. He always wore a suit and has had very good luck. And he made a resume. But he did run his own lawn business for a few years. Same for me when I got my job.

Cammie...I did look into legal separation but our insurance told us they consider that like a divorce so no benefits anyway. It cost the same money and requires the same paperwork so there really isn't a point to do that for me.

Thanks Swellmomma......that is all great advice and really helps me. I read a lot of your threads so I know a little bit about your situation. I did try that Divorce Care but I got a bad group so unfortunately I put myself out there and it didn't help. I have to really make myself go to meetings and things and I haven't been up to trying another one. I am trying to figure out who I am and what I like to do. I have been more surprised at the people who disappeared from my life and have never called to ask if I'm ok.

I am glad I posted though because I was stuck and it wasn't healthy. I can do this.....

Yes Joanne I know you are. I didn't quite mean it like that just that in your area of experience professionally and from experience you are more cautious. I am taking it seriously but at the same time he isn't evil and has been working with me. I just can't keep hearing all the negative cause I get it. I can only do what I am capable of. A dr visit will probably help that and I had already decided after this thread to go see the lawyer I found and to begin the divorce. I will not continue to fear the worst that can happen I will just go ahead and do it. I appreciate all the help and concern. You were all here when I needed the support.

I might be tempted to get a google voice number and give that to her. Then you wouldn't be bothered. I use a google voice now for most of my medical stuff cause I never answer my home phone.

Luckily in my life I know more people who have had good divorces than bad. I still plan to get the process moving along as I don't want him to surprise me with anything but so far he has been very workable around our arrangement. I am not fooled into thinking this new girlfriend won't cause that to change but he assures me he won't do that to his kids and he is very attentive to them.

Thanks for this! I do have my eyes open but it will just have to happen when it happens. It helps to hear that. Some people have such bad experiences that they see the worst always.

I stayed for so long because of the insurance and then when he left I was all set to just accept that I might need to use state medical and then I wavered. I may just have to mentally accept that fact and proceed. I really want to file and be autonomous. I really do.