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Just Kate

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Posts posted by Just Kate

  1. I don’t really have any advice, but I wanted to offer you a big hug as my family is going through almost the same thing right now. 

    My dad had emergency quadruple bypass surgery on March 11. He was also in the ICU for a long time, but that was because they didn’t have a bed on the Cardiac Step-Down floor for him. He had some pretty severe stomach issues while in the hospital and had a lot of trouble eating and going to the bathroom. He was finally discharged on March 21, but we had to take him back (through the ER) the next day because he became so sick. He was finally diagnosed with Rotavirus. After lots of fluids and meds for his stomach, he was discharged again yesterday. 

    He is doing pretty well now, but I can completely sympathize with the stomach issues that can happen after surgery. We just tried to encourage my dad, so it really sounds like you are doing the best that you can do there. Heart surgery is so tough…and depending on your dad’s age and physical activity before the surgery, I know it can take time to recover. 

    Is there an ICU nurse that you really like that you could pull aside and talk to? Like Katy said above, they are definitely used to grumpy old men. Maybe the nursing staff would have some tips for you?

    Sorry you are going through this!! Our hospital is about 40 minutes away and I am completely exhausted. Your dad is lucky to have his kids and wife there to be there for him through this. 

    • Like 3
  2. 3 minutes ago, Halftime Hope said:

    So what I was trying to say is that cardiac rehab may be awhile down the line for him. He may need PT coming to the house to get him ready for cardiac rehab.

    Also, a word to the wise: keep a very, very close watch on his voiding output, including both urine and bowel mvmts. It's easy to miss that someone isn't voiding correctly and end up with a catastrophe.

    Got it…I completely understand what you are saying now. I will see what options we have available to us tomorrow. The more help, the better! If we can do anything in-home, I will definitely request that. 

    And thanks for the tip on output. Good thing to keep in mind!! 

    • Like 1
  3. 36 minutes ago, TechWife said:

    Cardiac rehab is an outpatient program here. There are inpatient rehab centers here for people who aren't able to go home for various reasons. If he's able to go home & his surgeon says it's fine for him to do so, that's a good thing! Older people tend to do better the earlier they can get home. The risk of hospital delirium increases with age and length of hospital stay. Of course, any inpatient scenario also has risk of contracting an illness from another patient.

    I hope he is able to access some home PT and OT if outpatient cardiac rehab isn't an option.

     

    Cardiac rehab is definitely  an option, which I will  ask about before we leave the hospital tomorrow. His surgeon has already mentioned it to us, as have a few of the nurses. 

    • Like 1
  4. 4 hours ago, Beth S said:

    Agreeing with PPs.

    We've BTDT with our elderly parents (post-op for various surgeries).  Rehab is wonderful for those first difficult days/weeks.

    You don't want to fall yourself while helping him with transfers.
    You can visit and get familiar with what is required . . . but it's a LOT to undertake right after surgery.

    Rehab isn’t really an option for us. We live in a more rural area and the rehab options aren’t good. Even my dad’s surgeon told us that while rehab is an option, he feels that my dad will do better just going home. 

    • Like 1
  5. 40 minutes ago, TechWife said:

    I think waiting until the follow up appointment to discuss  cardiac rehab is too long. There are often wait lists for the program and it is a good idea to call to get on the wait list immediately after surgery. They will ask for the surgery date and he will be in line for an opening after it is safe for him to start the program.

    Recliner - dh slept in the recliner for a couple of weeks. Due to both movement restrictions and pain, he wasn’t able to push back on the arms enough to get the recliner to open. He used an ottoman instead.

    Movement restrictions are in place to help his sternum heal. It’s a broken bone, and they take time to heal. This is a good explainer video:

     

    Good point about cardiac rehab! My brother is at hospital with dad now, so I’ll have him mention it to surgeon when he comes in. 

    Thankfully my dad’s beloved recliner is powered, so he won’t need any strength at all to push it back. 

    • Like 1
  6. Thanks everyone for the awesome tips!! To answer a few questions…

    We did consider him going to rehab rather than home, but his surgeon suggested that home would be better (since my dad does have a support system). Sadly, the rehab facilities in my area are just nursing homes and the care is not good. I have heard of several stories of folks going to rehab after a hospital stay and not progressing. Although my mom has some physical issues, my brother and I live locally and will be available. We have both been at the hospital every day since all of this happened and do a decent job of communicating with one another. My brother has adult kids, who can help. My teens may be able to help a bit too. 

    My dad has a recliner he loves, so we will plan for him spending much time there at the beginning. 

    We are installing a bidet and a grab bar in my dad’s bathroom. He was able to use the hospital bathroom yesterday and said the grab bar made a huge difference!

    I will make sure my parents have a scale. Sounds like daily weighing is important. 

    Other items we are looking into - home health for now (if it’s available) and then cardiac rehab. I mentioned cardiac rehab to his RN yesterday and she said that we should discuss this with his surgeon during his first follow up appointment. 

    Thank you all so much!! If you think of anything else, please let me know. 

    • Like 1
  7. @hellen Awesome information…thank you so much!! 
     

    Dealing with bathroom stuff is my biggest worry right now. I assume my dad will use a taller potty chair at first?

    Regarding a bidet, I will talk with them about it. Funny side note, I have a bidet at my house. Back in 2020 my dh severed both of his bicep tendons 😳. We had like two days to plan for surgery and the first thing I did was to have a bidet installed. Saved my marriage!

    • Like 1
  8. 30 minutes ago, Harriet Vane said:

    I don't have specific experience with bypass surgery but will strongly urge two common sense things based on my experience with caregiving dementia patients and someone after brain surgery.

    Get in-home caregivers lined up for at least some of the time. You will need the respite and the help. 

    INSIST on physical therapy.

    These are not wait-and-see. They should both be in place immediately. It will take some doing, so best start talking to the hospital social worker and your insurance company right away.

    Good ideas! I will contact the social worker today to talk about home health. It is tiring to care for someone on this situation. I have been running back and forth between the hospital (30+ minutes away) and my parents’ house (15 minutes away in the opposite direction), while trying to work and take care of my house and my own family (youngest is 16…thank goodness). I sit at the hospital, but it just wears me out. How is sitting so tiring??

    • Like 1
  9. My dad is 79 years old and had emergency bypass surgery last Monday. He has been progressing well in the hospital and is set to be discharged on Wednesday. My dad lives with my mom in a one-story ranch home. My dad has always been fairly active, but my mom has some medical issues (her balance is very off - she seems so feeble). 

    My brother and I have been splitting our time at the hospital.  Now that we know the discharge date, I’m starting to think of what we need to do and how we should prepare. 

    Fortunately I work from home, so I should be able to work from my parents’ house some. My brother is a business owner, so while he is busy, he is also in charge of his own schedule. 

    Thoughts on how we should be preparing? Anything we should make sure to have at their house? Any tips or tricks?

     

  10. 33 minutes ago, Spryte said:

    I’m not there yet, either, but need to drop this here because it makes me laugh every time.

    Aaaack, trying to link again. It’s the Southern Thing YouTube video of grandma name shopping. I can’t link it. Maybe someone else can.

     

    Were you trying to link this?

     

    • Like 1
    • Thanks 1
    • Haha 7
  11. Dh and I both have Chase cards but my email address is used as the contact info for both. I get Chase emails all the time and have no idea if they are intended for dh or me, because they don’t put our names in the email. I would definitely look up Chase customer service number and call them. 

  12. 6 hours ago, Corraleno said:

    I'm super happy with it — it's totally invisible and just feels like a light-weight moisturizer (versus mineral sunscreens, which always make me feel like there's a film or coating on my skin), it doesn't bother my eyes at all, and it's really affordable. I only wish I'd found it sooner!

    Yes, thank you!! I’m going to place an order for some too. 
     

    I do have one additional question. I have purchased a high quality retinol that I use at night and vitamin c for daytime. Should I be using either of these near my eyes? If.l not, what do you use around your eyes? Thank you!!

    • Like 2
  13. My 19 yo ds is coming over and bringing his girlfriend. Dh will be here too. We are having wings, some type of taco dip (I’d like to make a dip with ground beef if anyone has suggestions?),  veggies with dip, and jalepeno poppers. I may also put some chicken tenders in the air fryer. 

    I’m looking forward to it. This will only be the second time that ds girlfriend has been over. She is a sweet girl and I am glad to get to know her better. 

  14. 46 minutes ago, Corraleno said:

    Vitamin C (let it dry), then moisturizer, then sunscreen. The reason dermatologists say to let it dry before the next step is because mixing it with other products can alter the ph and affect the absorption and efficacy.

    The consistency is literally like water. I put one pump in my left hand, get some of it on the fingers of my right hand, and then immediately start applying it to my face with both hands. It absorbs really really fast. Then I do another pump the same way and apply to my neck, and rub any remainder into the backs of my hands.

    If you find it too irritating to begin with, you can do the same thing people do with retinoids and acids like AHAs & BHAs — try just using it a couple times per week (on days you're not using a retinoid), and work up from there as your tolerance increases. Or what some people do is leave it on for 30-60 minutes, then rinse it off and reapply moisturizer, gradually working up to just leaving it on all day.

    Perfect! I just started using a retinol and I ordered the vitamin c you recommended. Did you say what brand of sunscreen you use? I have some neutrogena that I’ve been using, but not sure what to look for in a daily facial sunscreen.  

  15. 41 minutes ago, MEmama said:

    You were so convincing I immediately bought the vitamin C you recommended. Thanks for including the coupon code! 

    I did the same!!!

    I have a question, when using vitamin c, sunscreen, and moisturizer in the morning, what is the order for application?

    • Like 1
  16. 4 hours ago, Spryte said:


    Following along, but for now I’ve been happy with this routine (started a year+ ago, can see a difference):

    Tretinoin at night, Vit C serum in the morning. I use an inexpensive collagen cream am and pm, and also — sunscreen daily.

    For make up, I love Jones Road. I’ve switched over last year and have tossed most of my former products (Clinique, mostly). I use a very small bit of the WTF foundation (it’s very light and moisturizing, not a lot of coverage — I really like that it feels more like moisturizer), a face pencil if needed. I use their miracle balm very sparingly, and if you wait for a sale you can get smaller tubs to try different shades. I am not in love with their mascara, but everything else has been a winner on my skin. I do wish they had a satin or matte cream eye product.

    Can you share a bit more about your routine? For the tretinoin, is this prescription? I recently purchased a retinol from the esthetician that waxes/tints my eyebrows (I haven’t used her for anything else yet). It was expensive and I keep hearing about tretinoin. Is it a better option (the brand of retinol that I bought is SkinMedica)?

     

    Can you tell me more about Vitamin C serum? What brand? The SkinMedica one that was recommended to me was $$$ so I didn’t buy. 
     

    I am intrigued by the Jones Road makeup and will check it out. 

  17. 2 hours ago, fraidycat said:

    You are considered in menopause - menses paused/stopped - after going a full 12 months without a period.

    Perimenopause is the several years prior to menopause when your body is in transition from fertility to non-fertility. Symptoms range from mild to pure hell and include physical, mental, emotional, and generally also comes with a side of gaslighting that "it's all in your head" or "can't be that bad". 
     

    “Symptoms range from mild to pure hell…”

    My 48 year old perimenopausal self is over here cracking up at your description. 🤣🤣🤣

    • Like 1
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