My youngest is named Margalit, a derivative of Margaret. Everyone calls her Margalit or Meg, about 50/50. I as an endearment often call her Meggy or my little Nutmeg, only to her. My oldest daughter has started copying me and calling her those, which is kinda annoying and makes me sad because that was my endearment. Is that dumb? All my kids have had little nicknames that only I/my husband use when they're babies. My MIL has also done that with some of them with her own cutesy version of their name. It's sweet and I like that they have that special affection with her. When I was a kid my dad called me a nickname ONLY he used and I would have looked askance if anyone else tried it. Similarly my sister had a particular nickname of her name that only my aunt and one childhood friend ever used. It was special to just them. It never occurred to me someone else would use a name that was unique to one family member using. What do you think? If you start using a nickname/term of endearment one-on-one do others start using it too? Does it annoy you if they do?

It's slightly better now but I agree there definitely are whole aisles of just white dolls. And even the black dolls are often only marginally so. Like, I looked for an American Girl doll with brown skin and curly (tight AA type curls) black hair for my daughter, so it would look like her because at 11 she struggled to like her own hair especially and coveted her white friends' hair. There was no doll like that. You could find straight hair but the only ones with brown skin and curly hair had brown hair. And this was on their website too, so should have been the whole spectrum offered. Barbie is like that too, they just made it look like brown-skinned Barbie but the hair is still very caucasion. And I rarely see asian-looking baby dolls.

Ours would have to walk 2.0 miles just to get to the bus stop! Actual schools are in town, about 18 miles.

We got married in a church, invited all family and friends (but not mere acquaintances) and had just under 100 attend. Did an evening wedding with dessert + drinks reception. Had a new dress and tux, rings, fresh flowers, nicely but simply decorated reception location (used DH's neighborhood clubhouse with a big inside dining/dance room and beautiful wrap-around porch). $4000, including the honeymoon (4 nights at a nice cabin in the mountains). MIL and Aunt contributed much of the homemade (delicious) desserts and we paid a local woman who did a side business to do our wedding cake. Totally a real wedding in every way. If we'd had any financial help I'd have done a proper meal and had the wedding earlier in the day but as it was we didn't want to leave anyone out so dessert + drinks worked. But even a proper meal would have only brought the total to $5000 likely.

I agree with speech therapy, physical therapy, etc. And nursing. Anything computer-related, especially things often done independently like graphic design. I thought teaching would be more family-friendly, and I've lucked into part-time positions lately, but generally teaching is pretty all-or-nothing. Though I would contend the skills make you a flexible employee. Writing Marketing

I grew up in the generation where we were told, especially as girls, that we could be whatever we wanted to be and it was smart to wait and get married later, that your twenties were for fun and establishing a career. it is backfiring majorly. Biology doesn't change just because we choose to do the career thing first. The fact is, having babies after 40 is more rare to be able to do. No women in my family or Dh's have ever been able to get pregnant at that age. So for women who feel pretty sure they want kids waiting is a bad plan. It can work out, but it's stressful. My sister is 31, put off marriage to focus on fun and adventure (no judgment there, she has had adventures!) but knew she wanted kids eventually. Now she's stressed...majorly stressed about the ticking clock of fertility. She's now newly in a relationship with a seemingly good guy and I hope it works out great for them. BUT, he says his 5 year plan is to live in a van and travel together because he "missed his twenties" by joining the military and getting married/divorced. He says after 4-5 years he wants them to settle down and have two kids. Except, she'll be 35-36! Our mom, aunt, and grandma all had hysterectomies from medical need. Only one woman in the entire family has had a kid after 35 and she was 39. Logistically, that is an awfully short timeline in which she'll need to get pregnant and have two healthy babies. She loves him and doesn't want to rush for sure. But she feels the time crunch. I think it's too broad a statement to say all women who marry late in life are unhappy. Some may not want marriage/kids but then they meet a really great guy who they realize they'd enjoy being married to. I certainly wouldn't say those women are unhappy. However, intentionally waiting until late 30's to get married does seem to cause some serious stress and angst for women who do for sure want to get married. A lot of the good guys are already married by then, and it's harder to meet people who would be partner-material as you leave the college scene. And I would hate for my daughters to feel rushed into marriage because they know they're running out of fertility, or worse settling for just any guy. I look at it the other way around. I can only have babies until about 40 at the latest. I can work healthfully until 65 at least. So...I'd rather do the baby thing first, then get a master's degree and go back into my career once the kids are older. You can also do both at the same time, though that comes with real sacrifices we need to be honest about. And not everyone can handle that level of busy-ness, depending on health and personality.

We're dealing with the same thing re: not doing schoolwork, lying, obstinacy, and in our case teen-tantrums that eat up my day. I gave DD15 a warning that she had this spring to shape up or it'd be public school. We registered her yesterday and go for an IEP meeting the 6th. She's mad, but I'm relieved. We homeschool for academic and family-culture goals, so if a kid is no longer willing to benefit academically I figure they might as well be out of my hair and maybe they'll feel compelled to do basic work for teachers at school. We also took away privileges (like you: computer mostly) and it felt like there just wasn't much more leverage we had. I don't feel bad at all, it's just a computer, I never had regular computer time at 15...cause we had one clunky computer for our household and it was mostly for my mom's work. A computer, besides for papers/research, is nice to have but grounding from it really isn't too severe. You're doing the right thing sticking to your guns.

We have friends like that too. It's frustrating, but the best thing to do is let them vent a bit, say you're sorry and that it sucks, and guide the conversation to a different topic. When they go on about unwise purchases just say "oh, that's nice" and move on too. Don't be overly congratulative. This way if they know you don't have tons to offer in conversations about money they'll talk more about other stuff and you can enjoy the things you have in common/enjoy about each other more.

I completely agree.

I don't drink. I just don't like it and my mom is borderline alcoholic so I always felt like, why open pandora's box? I've never had an issue with people pushing alcohol on me! That's so uncouth. People who know me well might ask, "so do you never drink?" To which I just say, "Yep, pretty much. I just don't like alcoholic drinks and there's a family history of alcohol problems so I never made an effort to like it." That always suffices. We have a friend (male) who doesn't drink for similar reasons. It's never an issue, he's the life of the party sober! Lol! If a person I don't know well offers me a drink at a party I just say "nah, no thanks" and they never press.

Hm, well if he's never going to sunday Mass that puts him in a tricky situation of receiving communion but always being in a state of serious sin if this pattern continues to the point where he could get there himself. Being in a state of mortal sin would preclude being able to take communion anyway. I would say the religious ed instructor should not make that call and instead have the priest talk with the parents. Figure out how truly not able to get to Sunday Mass they are, their intent to do RCIA, etc. Then HE can really make the call on whether it's reasonable for the boy to make FHC. I made FHC as a child of parents who did not attend Mass and honestly I think it was irresponsible on the part of the church to allow that with me having zero catechism from home. I didn't know confession beyond the first was required and not just recommended until adulthood! I still struggle with making confession a habit as a result. My parents did not give the eucharist proper respect in letting me take it while telling me "oh, it's just bread, don't worry" because THEY were so poorly catechized themselves

Raised in a nonreligious home. Was baptized to keep Grandma happy I guess? Or more likely just because my parents thought it was the proper thing to do socially. We might have gone to Christmas mass a few times growing up. Otherwise zero talk of God, no prayers ever said, and religion was never discussed beyond as a social status thing, like "oh yeah, I went to Catholic elementary school. The nuns were mean." Lol Now I'm a practicing Roman Catholic, as I was baptized but now actually catechized and we attend Mass and religion is a big part of our lives. DH was raised Lutheran by his wonderful, devout family, was ordained a Lutheran pastor, then converted last year to the Catholic Church. He'd been drawn to Eastern Christian spirituality though in his long process of coming into the Catholic Church so he came in through the Byzantine Rite and all our kids except the oldest are confirmed Byzantine in his rite.

Watching the series right now and, um, it bears no resemblance to the Anne of Green Gables I know and love! This is...dark...and very little of the dialogue matches up. Poor Anne seems more pitiful instead of the amusing/sympathy-inducing character of the books. Such a shame because my oldest loves Anne but she definitely will not relate to this version at all. It is well done and I think if this were a totally different setting and not trying to piggyback off of Anne of Green Gables I'd like it for myself, though I'd never let the kids watch it either way.

Plum Paper! They're endlessly customizable and now have a homeschooling add on.

I wish! She's prejudiced against other deaf kids (makes me so sad/mad and we're actively working on this) so she isn't interested. Technically we could pull the parent card and tell her it's not optional and she'd go and adjust well. But, it's far enough away that they won't let her commute, she'd have to live there Mon-Fri and come home Fridays and holidays. It wouldn't be a bad option in lieu of college for her to have an extended deaf high school experience to age 20/21 but I worry whether she could handle it yet. Not sure if that's my own mom-worrying issue or a legitimate concern. Maybe a bit of both?

I have a 15 yo who does not care about anything, never has. She's immature (learning delays), and adopted so had a poor example growing up. We've been homeschooling for 3 years to catch her up and she's made progress in reading and math, though not as much as I'd like. She's decoding fine in reading but her vocab is low because of deafness/language disorder and speech therapy + at home work hasn't helped that. Her math is almost at grade level, about 7th grade. But her attitude gets downright awful for long periods of time. Currently she has daily teen-tantrums (slamming doors and refusing to talk or yelling) over schoolwork. It's to the point she even gets angry if we ask her to brush her teeth (the dentist is always on us about her not brushing enough) or get dressed. She's starting 9th grade next year and we need to make decisions. I was going to grit my teeth and homeschool her but I've just found out I'm pregnant and am very sick and will be until the birth in December. So that's making me less able/willing to calmly deal with tantrums over schoolwork all day. I see that she objectively makes more academic progress at home than she did at school but not on days she refuses to work of course. On the other hand I wonder if the accountability of high school would force her to take a bit more responsibility? At the very least I know from experience she would thrive on the structured atmosphere. And she'd qualify for IEP help of course. I don't know. At what point do you just sort of say, "she is who she is. If she doesn't want to succeed I can't make her" and let her go to public school so I can focus on the kids who are willing to do work? Or is this a 15-year old thing that she could outgrow in a year and then settle into homeschooling again just fine?

Yes, Emily is the only redeeming part of that whole season. The very end of her storyline gives me the warm fuzzies. It's like she finally truly grows. Rory is just...sad, frustrating, aimless, not herself. The end is deeply unsatisfying. It could've been great (shocking, but great) if she was 22 but it's 10 years later so it's a whole lot of "shocking, but so what??" Lorelai is spastic and overly whimsical and seems stuck in time which doesn't fit with her previous hip mom persona and her romance with Luke was sadly lacking. Especially when they'd been the big meant-to-be! I adore Luke! Lane is barely in the show and kinda lame. Hate her haircut.

Actually my husband and I, who both went to public school, were commenting on how accurately it portrayed high school. Aside from the rapes, which I believe happen but never to my group of friends though molestation and harassment did, everything else was pretty par for the course. The kids' attitudes, the sort of laziness of parents/school administrators about dealing with obvious signs of problems, the way the teens just sort of ignore bullying and low grade sexual abuse amongst peers. This is why my kids won't go to public high school. I don't see how sexual harassment, bomb threats (multiple times a year in our high school), suicides (one awful time in math class, several attempts in the bathrooms or at home), drinking, drugs, bullying, or social neglect are necessary things to experience. Especially because adulthood isn't like that at all. God, if I knew just how unlike life high school was things would have been different. And for the record my high school was an affluent school, not some povert-ridden or low-achieving school. Just a normal suburban high school. And those things shouldn't be normal.

Dude this is my worst nightmare! I have fast labors and don't mess around waiting anymore. With my last baby I planned an "induction". They broke my water a week before my due date, put in an epidural, and she was in my arms 3 hours later. Not even a whiff of pitocin. If I'd waited until I went into labor it'd have been a 1-2 hour labor based on previous pattern. Nobody takes me seriously either. I bet this woman is like me, totally fine and not seeming in pain until suddenly she is like ready to push and screaming, lol! Even doctors often don't believe women in labor when they say they're close to delivery.

I'd say it might be just what she needs. I wouldn't do full-time, but start with 1-2 classes in her strengths while continuing to remediate the math (and put in place accommodations wherever possible). I know it can be terribly frustrating to be stuck in high school when you're ready for more.

I'd also question the IQ score if she's self-aware enough to google her own symptoms of her own volition. DD15, with an IQ of 69 but possibly higher would never think to do that. It might be partly personality but it seems kids who truly struggle with low intelligence don't even think to google themselves or think in depth about their own self. As for the ADHD, I agree that low working memory often goes along with ADHD so there's definitely a possibility. Depression can also be comorbid with ADHD. The pediatrician can still diagnose ADHD even with other issues. It's worth checking.

I think it's a great idea. My only caveat would be to look carefully at the time/energy cost of pick up and drop off for preschool. Sometimes that can be more hassle than help depending on how far away the preschool is and such.

What about working at a zoo as a caretaker? Or doing dog grooming? Or if she's pretty high functioning (I know we have a wide range of special needs here) being a vet tech? That is typically a 2-year degree program, heavy in sciences but not at the level of a full veterinary program. I mean, I have a high IQ and no learning disabilities and I personally ruled out veterinary medicine because it would have required more math than I wanted and eaten up my 20's with grad school. I was happy teaching horseback riding and working at barns all through college. I think it's a matter of balancing where she is with where she'd like to be. And aim for a science curriculum that stretches her just a bit without overwhelming her.

I like the idea of doing lots of volunteering as a career/interest exploration. I've been looking into our local technical center's culinary arts classes because our district does allow homeschoolers to take ps classes on a part-time basis. That would be a few years down the road, but still it's an interesting option.

Sebastian, yes, I have thought more about an accredited diploma for this particular child (our others will likely do college). They all seem so expensive and rigid though! Like most of the requirements seem to assume the student is getting a college-prep education with Biology, Chemistry, Physics, 4 years of high school math, etc. Are there any with more scaled down requirements?