No.

I will not be on the WTM board for a week. You can reach me by PM (or by text) if you would like.

I didn’t say that your child was undatable. I said that I understood why the dad might respond the way he did. And gave a reason why I might respond that way for my adult offspring who are older than yours. I can’t see the ages of your boys on my phone.

All the commands: sit, stay, down, heel, come, up (to jump up on something), off, leave it, drop it, “hurry up” (our potty command), no, “knock it off/ no bark”, all the agility words like “dog walk “, “A frame “ etc. “Go to bed” ”wanna go out?” ”get Daddy/Mommy “. (Yes, she’s our baby) ”Get the bunnies “ (ie. Round them up and put them in their cages) the name of her best puppy friend “I love you.” ”You’re so pretty “ (at least she understands the love behind the last two phrases. “Go get your ball” or “where’s your ball”.

In my area with porch pirates and home break ins becoming distressingly common, a bit of proactive vigilance doesn’t seem to be out of line.

No mask. It’s not mean or cruel to say that I understand the dad’s reaction. It’s also not mean to say that I would want a certain maturity and problem solving ability in the people dating my kids. Other people in this thread had already hinted at this with their surprise. But I also wouldn’t be having any say in who my kids date. I trust my adult kids to make those decisions for themselves.

I would not want my kids to be dating someone who needed their Mommy to arrange several layers of emergency contact for them. I can understand the dad's reaction.

Nope. I was telling her the truth.

You’ve been married a long time. Your husband doesn’t appear to mind. Don’t take the criticism of a total stranger over the real life people in your life.

I copied and pasted this from the July Goals thread out in the Sea. I thought that I would share it with you since you've been along for the journey of my clearing the fence of the Giant Gravel Pile of Doom: Today I came up with a new goal. I don’t like to put time limits on goals though so I hope to get it done this year or next. So I have been working on freeing a fence section from a gravel pile that was pushing it down. It is finally free enough that I can see plainly that the fence section is irreparably bowed. Dh was talking about replacing it and I told him that I would like to do it myself. I will need step by step instructions but I am excited about learning new skills.

Weed whacking is my therapy. So I did more weed whacking today. And I have started on the second strip of the Giant Gravel pile of Doom.

Our Springer Spaniel with Puppy ADHD was a handful. I was grilling a beautiful (and expensive) rack of beef ribs one day and he stole the whole rack right off the grill. We chased him around and around the yard until we finally caught him and got the ribs from him. Then I whacked off the end where he had bit it and put it back on the grill. It was delicious!

One of the best classes I ever took was a Auto Mechanics for Women class put out by the YWCA. It was taught by a man but without any mansplaining vibes to it at all. I no longer bother to change my own oil, but I could if I needed to. And when my ds and his friend wanted to learn how to change the oil in their cars they came to me and not dh because I would explain it simply but without any judgement. And I would let them practice on my car. 😉

Today I came up with a new goal. I don’t like to put time limits on goals though so I hope to get it done this year or next. So I have been working on freeing a fence section from a gravel pile that was pushing it down. It is finally free enough that I can see plainly that the fence section is irreparably bowed. Dh was talking about replacing it and I told him that I would like to do it myself. I will need step by step instructions but I am excited about learning new skills.

Day 283

Eight Cousins

Friday breakfast- keto cinnamon blueberry granola with coconut yogurt lunch- scrambled eggs with mixed greens and onions and mushrooms; 1/2 flaxseed muffin; Jojo’s guilt free chocolate Dinner - Greek lamb kabobs (lamb, onion, bell peppers grilled on skewers); rice with carrots, a tomatoey sauce perhaps (the rice was slightly orangey in color); yogurt dip; salad (romaine lettuce, onions, tomatoes, cucumber with a vinaigrette) Eggs before bedtime

Instead of Fourth of July fireworks Newcastle is having First of July fireworks.

I always thought of hot dogs and beans as being slightly more "gourmet" than the beanie-weenies that came in a can! (I guess because you can adjust the sweetness and/or spices etc.)

Weed whacked. Freed the eleventh fence post.

You “called me out” for having a different life experience. You said that I implied things about your experience (which I wasn’t talking about specifically in any way because I have no idea what your experience is and where you’re getting your examples) that were not true: I am not implying that you are impatient or unkind or narcissistic. You implied that I had an attitude harmful to women. That is what I am rejecting. I don’t have that kind of power over you or any other woman.

Nope. I set appropriate boundaries and I am not going to take on your family dysfunction. I don’t take on burdens that I don’t want to take on.

If I know where they belong and if I'm not in the midst of a task (even a multi-day one) where I will need it again soon, then I will put it where it belongs. But some things are left out until I do a "tidy sweep" around the area. I'm ok with that.

I try not to weaponize what should be loving relationships. If a teen asked me how to do something that had been explained multiple times, I didn't get mad. I just asked them, "How do you think it should be done?" Often that was enough to get them visualizing what they had heard or had be shown. Once they could tell me how it was done, then they could do it themself. I married a competent adult, but he has certain blind spots especially during times of stress. If he asks me to locate something simple, I might ask him "where did you look"? And if he hasn't bothered to look, that will prompt him to do so. Or if he's too busy or stressed to look then he will state that and I will help him out gladly. He will do the same for me. If someone called to ask me if the hotel served breakfast, I'd simply say "I don't know. How are you going to find out?" And not in a snarky way. Sometimes people just don't think things through. If there truly was passive-aggressive behavior going on, then I would specifically deal with that. If there was a lack of boundaries then I would enforce them. A boundary can be "I won't look for your shoes unless you look in the usual spots first."

I never did get back to sleep. And since I didn't get to sleep until about 1 am, 5 am was way too early!