Oh no. Praying that you find them both safe….and soon!

Hugs and prayers. I also agree about reaching out to churches…and don't forget the LDS churches. A friend is LDS and she says that their church welcomes non-Mormons for help too. Usually, they want people to volunteer in return, but I'm not sure if that applies to non-Mormons. When we lived in NY state, there were programs regarding heating/cooling subsidies.

Sorry, but that's simply not true. Why? Your daughter can't determine her future partners' histories. Pap smears can diagnose an anomaly but they surely don't prevent it. When I was 30 or so, I had an abnormal pap. It was CIN I. I had gotten paps every year since I was 18…even before I was sexually active. (Maybe overkill…but I did.) I had been with one person. I ended up going through a colposcopy…which is the most horrific pain I've ever experienced, and I've had two of my kids without anesthesia. Little pinch my #UI@#. I also needed a LEEP procedure. Your daughter can be a virgin when she marries. She can be faithful to one person. You have no idea what the sexual history of her partner will be. Even if he tells her that he was a virgin, you really have no idea. Also, in some circles, they go by quite technical terms (meaning vaginal only)….and they can still have HPV. Cervical cancer still kills 4000 women each and every year in the US. Oral cancers still kill 8,000 per year. The mortality rate for oral cancers is high because they are diagnosed late. These are real deaths that far surpass even the most paranoid anti-Gardasil website estimates of death from vaccines. These are only in the US. The deaths worldwide are far greater. I will encourage my daughters and sons to get the HPV vaccine when possible. If it reduces their chance of not only cervical, but also oral cancer, great. The study I posted on nearly 200,000 people showing no fatalities, etc. is not the only study. The Danes (love socialized medicine) looked at how it is impacting HPV lesions among vaccinated and non-vaccinated people. "“Our study reveals a reduction of between 40 and 80 percent of cervical precursor lesions in vaccinated women compared to non-vaccinated women. We assume that this figure also applies to the risk of subsequent development of the disease.†http://sciencenordic.com/hpv-vaccine-effective-danish-women That is pretty darn great. I would not wish a colposcopy on my worst enemy. I would never want to hold my daughter's hand through one, knowing that there was a vaccine that could have reduced her risk of having it by 40-80%.

You can actually go back and see old vaccination schedules on the CDC website. It's kind of fun, actually. Hep A and B weren't given in the 80s because they didn't exist as vaccines. Same with Rotavirus. Same with varicella. We want to think that they're not a big deal. I mean, I got chicken pox. So what? Well, there were roughly 2000 people who died in the US from chicken pox during my youth. Not a big number, but not easy to just ignore. If 2000 people had really died from Gardasil vaccine (or any vaccine) people would be horrified. Each year, rotavirus kills roughly 400,000 people worldwide. Gardasil is the dream we used to dream about. Remember, what if there was a vaccine against cancer? Well, there actually is. And studies looking at over 100,000 patients showed no adverse events. Yet the pseudo-scientists hold more weight. Amazing and sad. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23027469 We were spoiled by Salk and Roentgen and others who never took patents on their inventions. These days, vaccines and everything else is big bucks. I used to work for pharma, you think only about billion dollar drugs. We need to change how vaccine and antibiotics (and perhaps other drugs) are funded/researched/and marketed. It can't just be about profits. The skepticism against science doesn't help. Of course, when you actually need a life saving drug, the science matters. Then you want your doctor up to date. But if you're just a pundit or talk show host, you can blast it all you want.

If this is true, I'm assuming autopsies were done. What was the cause? How did they rule out SIDS? (as SIDS is the default for infants who die with basically no other known reason)? Was it reported to VAERS?

99 cents for an individual pack of cookies sounds expensive to me. I think it would be much cheaper at Costco or Sam's Club. I would actually speak to the produce manager at Sam's or Kroger's and see if they'll give you a deal so you can provide fresh fruit as part of the snack. Heck, being in GA, can you get peaches? :) I would want to do something with more protein/staying power…so I like the ideas of GORP or something similar. This is a wonderful thing you're doing and I'm sure anything you do will be appreciated.

Agree with so many mentioned... A Christmas Story Terminator…for the cultural references (teens) A Room with a View…older kids Romy and Michele's High School Reunion so they can understand their Mom…but when older The Last Emperor The Elephant Man My Life as a Dog Anything John Hughes All Back to the Future All Steven Spielberg films Sophie's Choice (teens) Disney 80s films like "Little Mermaid" Chariots of Fire Fish Called Wanda (older…seem to remember sex) plus other Monty Python stuff :) All John Candy's films Strange Brew Amadeus…and you must also play for them the Falco song :) Raising Arizona Raiders of the Lost Ark series Top Gun Footloose Ann of Green Gables series Oh…and "Stripes"…it was the first R-rated movie I ever saw. I was 14, I think. Memories. :)

I have Hashimotos and gluten-intolerance. Suffered with IBS-D with urgency issues for 20+ years. Honestly, sometimes I just want to be normal. Last week, I went out for a pedicure. First time in years. I never know what is going to cause issues, so I stopped eating at 4 p.m. the night before (no wheat, gluten, etc.) and didn't eat anything in the a.m. except water. I still had issues and had to keep excusing myself from my pedicure. I felt so horrible/embarrassed/etc. The pedicure lady was really nice, though…and as they were not crowded, it wasn't a giant big deal. I did find a way to finish the pedicure…but I was almost in tears because I've been dealing with this for so long, and I still have days where nothing goes right. The Hashimotos hasn't been as difficult, but I lucked out and have had two really great endocrinologists who have helped. The biggest issue I've experienced is fatigue…but I'm not always sure what to attribute to my thyroid and what to having four kids. My kids are great though, and the 10, 8, and 6 year old will help entertain the 3 year old on days when Mom just really really needs a nap. I'm sorry. I hope things get better.

Yes, I enjoyed that book too! :)

We got the bike helmet type questions at our last physical. She also wanted to know if DD (6) could ride a bike without training wheels. I kind of took it as a developmental thing. She said she wore a helmet, and I'm assuming if DD had said "no"…then she would have said how it was important, etc. They were all verbal, though…nothing written. Nothing about trampolines or guns. Guns do harm a lot of kids here in Florida. (OK…we're Florida…we're always in the news for stupid stuff.) One thing that might come up is that many police stations will give you one of these locks free for your gun, as an added safety measure. Actually, being in FL, I'm surprised swimming skills don't come up more, because we have around one drowning per week here. Pediatric dentist in upstate NY used to ask us for our town so he'd know if the water was fluoridated or not. It really varied. I think for me, it would depend on my mood as to how I would view the questions…as well as how vulnerable I felt. Homeschooling is super-common here, so that wouldn't raise any red flags. Back in upstate NY where we used to be, a lot more hoops to jump through, so far more rare. People don't go into pediatrics or primary care to make the big bucks. If they did, they'd specialize. I don't believe pads are asking these out of some sort of desire to ruin people's lives or participate in some Big Brother program. I think they ask these questions because they want to help you have the healthiest kids possible and to reduce the risk of injury. There are a lot of clueless parents out there. Also, going to pediatricians for parenting advice is rather normal…see: Dr. Spock, Dr. Sears, etc.

There's a children's book by Cynthia Rylant called "Cat Heaven" which my friend who worked in a vet office for years used to recommend for adults and kids. I'm sorry for your family's loss. It was a wonderful thing for your DH to stay with your kitty during his last moments. I'm sure that the cat knew how much he was loved.

Most people don't meditate for hours and hours…although there are retreats (usually Buddhist) where they do. For kids, there are some simple meditation books like http://www.amazon.com/Handful-Quiet-Happiness-Four-Pebbles/dp/1937006212/ref=pd_sim_b_1?ie=UTF8&refRID=1JE2MXYFXPN58ZX9HXY8 For kids, even five minutes can be a lot and have good benefits. Check out the HeartMath Shift and Shine technique too. http://www.heartmath.org/free-services/tools-for-well-being/shift-and-shine-age-3-to-6.html

Enzymatic cleaners would probably work best….but I'd also try hydrogen peroxide or Tide.

I used to always be dressed, and have the kids dressed, but in DH's culture, you keep your "good" clothes for outside and wear PJs or "house clothes" inside. I thought he was really weird the first 7 years of marriage…but in the past 5 or so, I've given up. My dream is to have either an Egyptian style reception room…a room kept spotless just for company….or move to a State where I can have a basement, and keep all the kid stuff down there. I hate drop-in visitors, but would love to have a house where kids/people dropping over wouldn't frazzle me. This is my life….

dp. sorry. I will say that I agree with not publicizing the shooter's name at all. Publicize the victims, fine…but not the shooter. Where I work, we try and do that with DV homicides too. We talk about XYZ's murderer being convicted, but we really try to hide the abuser's name as much as possible.

Thing is, I seem to remember reading that something like 83% of people favor gun control regulations. So, I don't necessarily think that the NRA votes their members' views. They like to hype up that Obama or the gov't is coming to get your guns, but it hasn't happened.

I was prescribed 50KIU of D2, but decided to go with D3 OTC as it's absorbed better (spoke with my doctor about it). It worked well for me, but I actually need to take 50KIU weekly to maintain any sort of D levels. It also helped resolve my elevated PTH.

I would probably wait until after the visits and get your DS's input. At 13, I would definitely take that into consideration. If he likes #2 better, I'd also consider #2 for 7th and 8th grade, and then perhaps moving to #1 if you feel he's not being prepared well enough for college. Schools are like homeschooling. You don't have to commit forever. #2 might be great for only a year or two, and then you can move---or you may find that it works completely for your son and family. Can you talk to families of kids who graduated from #2 or who have at least been there for a few years? (Knowing that the school is new.)

Re: atheism/agnosticism, back when I was in college (late 80s), it was quite normal. There were very few mega churches, etc… and if you grew up Mainline, for many, going to church was more social than belief. There was nothing that I can recall being preached about 3:16, etc. People were very much cultural insert faith, but very few believers, or if they were, that was something to keep hidden. I remember among many of my friends, the belief was that they were "too smart" to believe in man-made religion. This was the era when virginity was something to be gotten rid of, to be ashamed of…even among women. As for voting for Obama, both he and Romney were Harvard alum. Part of it may be the desire to be seen in history supporting the "right" candidate….the first biracial President, etc…rather than the establishment candidate. Although Harvard draws heavily from the NE corridor, I'd be surprised if 80% really are Dems, through and through.

I've done it, but I leave the car and a/c running. DS1 or DS2 locks the doors. Not an issue. I have GI issues and sometimes have to run in to use a bathroom very quickly. I cannot wait to get kids out.

:grouphug: I have no experience, but I think if I was in your position, I'd do the same thing. I think because you've been open with them, it will be easier. Some hospitals or hospice groups have children's hospices which might have some good resources.

Those poor parents. How horrific to go wake your child up from a nap and find out that s/he has died. :( I also feel very bad for the manufacturer. It would kill me to have manufactured something that caused babies to die. :(

DH is an ophthalmologist and treated a kid (12-13) with a ruptured globe (eye) because of one. He was a bystander, not one of the kids playing with the guns. Just the wrong place, wrong time type scenario. I don't think they're safe at all….and I have questions about the ability of kids to use them safely and have the right precautions in place to avoid hitting somebody. There are some neighborhood boys (8-10) who have them… do not wear eye protection….and do not look out for other kids. It worries me a lot.

Kcuf cancer. Lots of prayers for his family. I hope he had good hospice support and his death was as easy as possible. :(

The key is usually applying enough and often enough. The lotions work better than sprays in terms of coverage, because the wind can affect how the spray gets on. So, usually it's more effective to save the spray for those hard to reach places. Apply every hour, especially if you're sweating or at a beach/swimming, etc. I seem to remember you want to use a full shot glass per person, but obviously, kids need less, and larger folks need more. I usually buy Target (up and up) or Wal-Mart (Equate) store brands and they work great. If you're at a park or someplace fun, set an alarm on your phone to remind you to reapply. I think there are apps out there that can tell you based on the weather, your skin types, etc. how often to apply too, but I don't have any experience with them. (Oh…and I'm a fair skinned, blue eyed Floridian who was adopted by a family with Native American and Italian blood (so no concept of sunscreen). I've had 30+ dysplastic nevi removed. Now that I use rash guards and reapply often, I don't have issues. Literally a few days ago, Consumer Reports came out with rankings again. http://www.bostonglobe.com/lifestyle/health-wellness/2014/06/01/which-sunscreen-works-best/W0VD5rvXpFVdlPEfMxaKOK/story.html)