Yay! (quietly) :D I'll call you later. Woohoo!!!

it's worth it. :001_smile: Green Tomato Mincemeat. We've frozen it in gallon bags in the right quantity for pie fillings, but it has been eaten right out of the bag, too. It's vegetarian and nummy. There's also a fried green tomato recipe that has you finish them with a little bit of cream in the pan right at the end? Others I tried weren't so nice, but that one was awesome. I'm sorry I'm no help with recipes (Google is good) -- I don't have my cookbooks.

Things are a bit upside down here. Haven't yet managed to get into a home of my (and kids) own. It's not looking terribly likely to happen either, with recent legal stuff...

I could be just, erm, hormonal, but increasingly I want to SMACK people who use the term "helicopter mom/dad/parent" -- MAN!!! It gets bandied about mostly by crazy people who (IMO) read one book (or eavesdropped on people who read one book) and latched on to a term they don't really grasp. Maybe I'm really just hormonal... :D

using scotch tape and cotton balls or little pieces of toilet paper to make pretend band-aids when my brothers and I were small. :001_smile:

Sending you hugs, madame. I've recently vanquished (temporarily) the voices in my head that whisper, "You're only one person, you'll never get this under control/together/be sufficient!!!!" My mantra(s) for these times: It's a season. This too shall pass. Do what must be done. Make sure you're getting some sleep. Drink lots of water and snuggle the kids. The school gets done in pieces, and it does get done. Anyway, that's the inside of my messy head. Hugs and blessings and more hugs. And here, have some chocolate and some laundry baskets full of clean and folded laundry and a nice casserole. :grouphug:

You all sure are smart! And articulate and compassionate and logical. :D I could go on, but we're supposed to be on our way to co-op now. So thank you and if anyone happens to have more thoughts, keep 'em coming.

Pardon the ambiguity -- I'm reaching for help but hoping to maintain discretion. Let's run a hypothetical situation. Say your newly adolescent son casually mentions that "someone" has told him that's it's not necessarily a big deal to "interpret freely" (my words) the third commandment. This person has in fact defended certain speech, according to the child in question, by stating that "words won't send a person to hell." I agree that syntax itself has little power. I think God has the ability to look upon our hearts and know what's up with us. Indeed, he meets us where we are -- one of my favorite things about him. :) However, this person, whilst playing fast and loose with some of the other commandments (my interpretation) has claimed to the kids to be "still a Christian" and doesn't attend church because this person "has a problem with the way those people say one thing and do another." Um. Yeah. The thing is, it's all smoke and I get that. Flouting some of the rules while beating people over the head with the ones you want respected for yourself is nuts. And I bet I'd have at least something to say if I were watching someone else in this. But I'm not. I find that it takes awhile for my brain to work through these terrifically emotionally loaded scenarios so I'm attempting to bounce this off y'all. What on earth do I say to my kids? The eldest is toying with opposite ends of his still malleable identity, testing boundaries. The girls are less obvious at this stage but are pretty bothered by folks on the other end of things "claiming to be Christians" but continuing to speak the way they do. (By reports, the person they're left with while he's at work -- OW -- has gone so far as to tell other adults to watch their mouths in front of the kids because my fearless middle child brings her concerns up to her dad. Then this person proceeds to blow it right then and there by using the same language she warned against.) Wah. Any ideas?

I'm seriously considering writing you in for president -- or maybe you'd move tot he other coast and be our governor?? :D

Success. (cheesy grin) 1.) Good grown-ups. I want my kids to become compassionate, thoughtful adults capable of assessing logically any quandry in which they may find themselves, of dealing kindly with others, and of representing firmly, articulately -- without condescension or rancor -- what they believe. I want them to reach their full potentials in social, academic, and professional areas -- and I realize that their choices may not bring them bright lights or even my tacit approval. I don't care. If they work hard to maximize what they've been given and can do so with a clear conscience I'll consider my mothering venture a raging success. 2.) The details of this (academia) are another matter entirely. For that I need to clone myself and rewrite a little family history, not to mention hiring a full time cook (nutrition), a nurse (Q), and a governess (to keep me on track with the planned trajectory for the kids). Subjects ideally include: two foreign languages, higher maths, grammar, vocabulary, writing, history, geography, current events, easy familiarity with the basics of all branches of science, at least two muscial instruments, fun/confidence with a variety of media (art), a working knowledge of several artists and local museums/galleries, a little sewing, cooking, carpentry, how to change a flat and do basic car/home repairs, perhaps some HTML, C++, Java, whatever. Plus an ability to speak to relevant passages in literature and the Bible (as opposed to misquoting either in order to support personal proclivity). And I hope (pray) that faith is central to their filtration of all things. (Gasping for air) My greatest joys are when my kids are "caught" self-regulating in time management, good judgement, spontaneous kindness, or hard work. And I hope those opportunities just continue to grow as they do. Thanks for the chance to think a little on this -- It's helpful to take time to think on the bigger goals, isn't it? Sometimes I lose that focus in the midst of the push to get all the stuff done, you know? I'm going to print and keep this so I can have something (hard copy) to check my everyday stuff against. Blessings.

I'd love a review if you use them -- good bras are hard enough to come up with, but sports bras? Oy.

I just got Nike sports bras at their outlet -- originally ~$70, for $9.99. Yay me! Now to use them...

This is so hard! I think as time goes on we'll discover that more and more of "quirkiness" or even stuff like this is really a question of brain function/anomalies. I'm hoping to communicate well to my kids that evil we don't tolerate, but illness we have compassion for. (And telling the difference requires a lot more effort than most of us can afford.) That said, does this guy acknowledge that there are issues and they're all his? Does your firend have alcoholism or other addiction issues in her family? I ask because her willingness to hold things together at all costs sounds like codependency, big time. She has to have bought into some aspect of this situation for it to continue at status quo. (Not that his behavior is in any way her fault. AT ALL.) I think she'd be wise to insist that they get help from an entity that is likely to turn their lives upside down -- financial counseling, the Amen clinic (to sort out his particular issues -- this may seem extreme to some, but really, REALLY, it's often the factor that explains this kind of "checked-out" behavior), a strong pastor, accountability with friends, perhaps she can go to a Co-dependency Anon meeting. And this man needs to start selling his #%)& on ebay yesterday. If he's not just a pure sociopathic narcissist, SOMEONE has got to get through to him that to bring his retired parents to zero savings and risk the well-being, indeed the very existence of his family is nuts. Really. It requires thought processes that are. not. normal. Maybe an intervention would help. It may also be necessary to explain that while no one in his life wants to alienate him by calling him on his risk-taking behavior, they are choosing to take that chance because they love him too much not to hold him accountable for the actions he's taken -- and that he, being a child of God (if this is appropriate) is worthy, capable, and can do good things. But continuing down this path will ultimately cost him everything he loves -- even if he tries to rationalize it away. Someone has to "play him the movie" that he's writing the script for. Gosh. I'm so sorry for your friend. I'm glad she has you. Keep holding the mirror up as lovingly as you can because this is only the beginning, no matter what she decides to do or how he responds to it. :grouphug:

is it possible to use regular detergent or must one use the HE stuff? TYVM. :D

Hope things ease a bit for you as time passes and karma (the great boomerang) comes wheeling back to nip the whiners where they need it most. About how to get back up? Doing the next thing and the next thing, all day long, for days, until finally one looks up to realize that real progress has been made and that the wound is no longer bloody, merely sore, now. Find small things that bring you joy (like your fabulous young men) and revel regularly -- hourly, if need be. Use these experiences to string together a daily list of thankfulness. Recording these things makes a pattern of strength and beauty where otherwise scar tissue grows. Blessings to you, madame. You are a gracious, lovely human being and I'm sad for your neighbors that they find themselves so lacking in your particular good qualities that they need to undermine you in order to feel better about themselves. :grouphug:

:iagree:

rolling, at least at certain points. Anne Lamott's Operating Instructions about her son's first year of life had me nearly wetting my pants (I was pregnant at the time).

Me too. Sniff. I'm posting the song on my blog later, along with suggestions for comfort food. :D

...an email I received from a friend re: her charter school. Parents, Below please find fantastic internet curriculum resources on the election, art lessons and free grammar and writing handbooks! 1) The presidential election is coming up very soon, and now is a great time to help students understand the difference between the popular vote and how votes are counted in the Electoral College system. Please take a few minutes to review the links below. This first link includes a video that explains the Electoral College clearly and with excellent visuals. http://freetech4teachers.blogspot.com/2008/09/electoral-college-teaching-resources.html Electoral College http://www.pbs.org/newshour/extra/teachers/lessonplans/socialstudies/Vote2004/electoral_college.html Elections, Electoral College Elementary and Secondary http://www.pbs.org/elections/kids/educators.html High School Lesson Plan on the Electoral College: http://www.learnnc.org/lp/pages/3468 For grades 3-8 http://www.teachervision.fen.com/elections/lesson-plan/3246.html I haven't looked at the sites yet, but she's always good for resources. :D Hope they're helpful.

I knew as soon as I hit "post" that I'd forgotten you and Kate in CA, and oh, probably a million others... Hugs to you, madame! :D

Aw! (blushing and waving) Back at ya, ma'am. I feel like I know so many of you like sisters but would probably be shy in person (more blushing). I can't remember everyone, but there are a few who sorta stick out... ;) M - our kids are very close in age and the various high and low points of life have added up to sticking closer than a brother. kalanmak - makes positively wicked food and conversation -- I look forward to opportunities to ride with her Pam SFSOM - verbal sword wielder and blankie hunter extraordinaire (we still tear up over that one) -- and you do not want to tick her off. :D Amy in Orlando - has sent me actual soap. Yum. HomeontheRanch - actually helped pack my house when our second-borns were only weeks and days old, respectively. Crissy, Patty in WA, frogpond1, Needleroozer, and oh, crud, other people whose board names I can't remember... Too many of you to count, including The Book Samaritan (Ree), have sent books and materials (even maternity clothes) -- which have saved us more than once over the last few years. And there's an always growing list of people I'd like to know -- when I have time to get here, this is a highlight. I mostly miss the kerfuffles (though, seriously? you people are scary when your moral sensibilities have been offended -- not many folks on the planet become more articulate and logical when outraged. Hmmm -- perhaps we should take over the world...) ;) and really appreciate that so many brilliant, kind people care enough about this journey our kidlets are on that they/we keep coming back and propping each other up. Awesome stuff.

Thanks very much, ma'am, for your good wishes. :)

She is an absolute treasure. :) And the best part? This is exactly who she is, no kidding. She's also funny, smart, gorgeous :D and was my roommate in college. Thank you for your kind words -- she read them and got all sniffy herself.

How about this: New moms and sleep I don't know if he's right or not or how old your little one is, but in my experience, even if you hit the ground running within a week or so (which I did as soon as Mr. was released from NICU at 5 days old), you should give your whole family at least three months to adjust to the new punkinhead's appearance. Does this mean you slack off? Maybe some would see it that way. I think it means that EVERYONE in the family talks about the grace we extend to each other and how we need to continue to raise that bar, even if we jolly well don't feel like it. If you're tired because you have a full plate, welcome to the club. Perhaps your honey needs to have a little one on one time with you so he can have some sort of filling up of that marriage part of himself. Guys sometimes feel displaced when the normal kid stuff seems to be taking over. That's pretty normal. Not real helpful, :D but normal. If you're really hanging out, feeling snappish and twitchy, how about putting them back in until Christmas? I don't know if any of the above really helps, but you have to know that you're gonna be okay. Hug your hubby extra tight and tell him so. Even if you feel like popping him in the head. :D And then do the thing you know you need to, bravely, whatever that may be. Hugs and blessings to you and yours.

Hooray! I love your ad. Let us know how it goes. :D ;)