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  1. I am actually just talking about personal boundaries between you and her.
  2. Aside from all of the above, she is a young adult now and you need to respect her wishes anyway....if you want her to have good boundaries with others (men, friendships, even coworkers and employers) it starts at home. If she learns to assert her boundaries and they are never respected she will not understand how to assert them, will give up asserting them, etc. But if you respect her boundaries then she will learn properly how to assert them with others. VERY important for her mental health and future success. Boundaries start at home.
  3. I personally would not have wanted my similar health issues to have been addressed in my counselor letter, and when I was in high school, my counselor knew me very well and knew their were issues, but he was a guidance counselor, concerned with choosing colleges and current classes and talking about financial aid. He was not a "mental health counselor" per se and there were other people involved at school helping me and other students with those issues. Two different uses of the word counselor. I think it would raise a really strong red flag to have the counselor letter be intimately acquainted with that nature of a student's life because typically that doesn't have much to do with their job. in a great school wtih a very excellent guidance counselor the student will only see them, maybe if they are lucky twice a year, and then an extra meeting or two senior year. In a small private school they may be more on a first name basis because a counselor might also teach a few classes,...but unlikely in any public school. So, I would say to leave it off. But if your dd wants to address that in her essays, that would be the place to do it. (probably not the best place since they'd rather see her thoughts, creativity, goals, and something interesting...again they read literally thousands of essays and they get very tired of the same "overcoming obstacles" essays. They want to see something unique and different and for her to tell them who she really is. IMO that obstacle does not define her.) (I am not minimizing your dd's struggle at all. It is very real and she is a strong warrior who will have to continue to overcome, think right thoughts, manage her life and all...I am just saying from the perspective of an Admissions Reader, these are what I've read and heard in my research.)
  4. 1. Extra curricular activities should NOT go on the transcript unless they were counted as credit towards graduation. They should be listed in the EC portion of the Common App, or the school's app. 2. Your transcript should be as east to read as possible, and as similar to schools as possible, while somehow showing clearly that she's a homeschooler. So, NO Italics. The class should say IP or in progress or PL for Planned. For your total credits, you should have them by semester so they can see each semester what has been earned. 3. You could change things around and list by subject instead of year but that's a judgement call. Some readers may be turned off by the fact that it's different and annoyed that they have to take a second look...others may appreciate that it's something different. You have to ask yourself, if you were looking at 3000 applications, printed, stapled and sitting in front of you, what would you prefer? 4. I think this is a very very strong transcript, and no matter how you organize it, you do not need to worry. This is a high achieving student by anyone's standards, and she will get a second look at any college. Also, do put her SAT scores on her transcript if they're good.
  5. Wow, this is very different schedule than what my ds had. .... as an out of state student, it was expensive to fly home for such a short period of time. Then again, how many kids would really stay at college over Thanksgiving break...they'd probably have empty dorms anyway. He HAD to vacate the dorms they were fully closed over thanksgiving week. SO he flew home, spent 5 days here and went back for finals. He has three weeks left, so they are done much later than your dd. His last day of finals is the 20th of December. My son was really happy to come home but I'm not positive he will want to come home next year if he receives offers from friends. It's a heck of a long flight for only being home 5 days.
  6. My mom (dd's grandma) is going to be bummed that we took one well regarded college out of the mix. Campus is beautiful and they have a long standing great reputation as well as a recent turnaround and increase in excellence due to a new President. However, it makes no sense to even apply It's an academic Target, but dd would need very significant scholarships to go there. AND they don't exactly have her degree. Though they have a related degree, they said she'd need to supplement with a few outside courses to have the experience necessary to do what she really wants to do. They are a small college and very student focused, and offered to guide her through that process and find a few courses for her locally as well as guide her to find internships, but... It would make no sense. When there are other schools that are much more like to give scholarships OR are already very affordable AND have her exact major and relationships with companies for internships. Sometimes we get caught up in nostalgia, or beautiful campus or whatever...without really thinking about the actual student standing in front of us.
  7. This has been super helpful! I forgot, in my own thinking to define a "high possibility school" (aka safety) as also financially 100% affordable. For my dd, the ART schools, we are not really looking at or caring about SATs. Her score is way above their average SAT for the one Art school she is looking at. But the portfolio and essay matter MUCH more. For Regular colleges that have art programs and do not require a portfolio, we are looking at grades and SATs to factor in whether it is "highly likely" "good probability" or "not very likely" to get in. We also have a "highly likely to get in" but which is not financially affordable without very significant merit aid so that is no longer our safety school. My dd doesn't like the word safety for any of the four that are now on the list. She loves all of them for different reasons and each one offers something unique. The top two reaches definitely are a step above in terms of what they would offer her for her future, and even just the college experience. One is huge (PSUUP), has special SLOs that you live in first thing freshman year, amazing notoriety, full college experience, brother is there, etc. The other is an Art School that is small, specialized, one on one attention, 100% job rate after graduation, and right where she really wants to be in terms of city life as well as known nationwide....Likelihood at PSUUP is about 65% according to PrepScholar, but liklihood at Art School is totally a wild card as it depends almost 100% on portfolio. So they are the "reaches" for lack of a better term. But the other two "safeties" (one is affordable one is not so technically only one is a safety) each have great things going for them- great faculty that answered her emails, with invitations for visiting campus and meeting the faculty, small class sizes, awesome Study Abroad opportunities, each of them within 15 minutes of Center City Phil. and clean, safe campus in beautiful suburban setting with shopping and downtown nearby. Classes that sound interesting, and engaging and enough clubs and activities that there should be something to join. As a process of this thread and talking with my dd we moved some things around, and it has been super super helpful!!!
  8. 1. So far most of the replies have been with high stat students in mind. What about above average students? 2. Define "blew away test scores" (is that like 200 points above their average 75th percentile?) (100 points?) 3. Also, is there merit in sending a kid to a school that's well below stats and they feel like they're awesome, and sail through the first two years pretty much unchallenged? Or where the people are just not as smart, overall? Wonder if the student who was much smarter would feel that difference and regret it? (I am thinking a college where average 75th SAT is 950-1000 but student is a 1300 type kid from a well read home and childhood where homeschool mom and dad exposed them to a lot of museums, reading, documentaries, discussions, philosophy, etc...)
  9. You know you've got something going when CM is a safety for Engineering/STEM! Laughing with you not at you!
  10. Also, right now my dd is in an interesting situation as a future art major because some schools that are "safety schools" academically might not be due to Portfolio. Her one Art School she is applying to cares more about portolio and essay than anything else....so absolutely no way to make a guess....and her one safety as far as Portfolio is a Reach as far as academics! It really changes the game and adds a whole 'nother twist. But just in general, I am looking for your definitions, what you went on, and what your idea of a safety is....
  11. I just want to hear what your definition is...my idea of Safety School seems to have morphed during the process with my son and now with my dd. ....
  12. True, that is the one thing that we love so much about PSU, all the kids are so friendly! They'll stop and give you directions, and everyone is like a big family. I wish the same for my dd! I want her to feel comfortable and excited about opportunities.
  13. Lanny, yes technically our EFC for the second child would be less than the attendance at a 70K IVy. But this child is not going to one, and we are not willing to pay as much even as our EFC by any means. 🙂 This thread has been great- thanks for all of your thoughts. We might just focus on the ones I know we can afford and then visit the others only if we are in the mood while in town, but even then I'm not sure as I really don't like raising expectations, when perhaps the other schools are just as great she and would have been excited and content with them.
  14. Thank you so much Lanny for the reminder that this year and next will be stressful as it is! We don’t qualify for work-study but kids have good summer jobs. Which helps. They got in early as 15 year olds with the City working at our local Aquatics Center and the pay is good. Anyway, what I’m doing with this dd is applying to 3 OOS public institutions (for a hundred good reasons not to bother going into) and she’s looking at another 2 privates. For the better one of the privates, her SAT is above the 75th percentile but not by much- maybe 30 points. She doesn’t have any AP classes and like I said not a stellar record of involvement. GPA is looking like it’ll be about 3.7 after junior year. The other private U 75percentile is well below her SAT score so maybe better chance for scholarships but the school itself is not nearly as good as her PUblic Reach (PSU) or her Target school. She also has a public safety. So really now that I think of it the second private U would definitely be Pointless to visit. In order to go there she’d need to not get into her public reach, her public target and get a huge 20k scholarship. I feel like that’s gelling together! so we could just make a last minute trip to the Private better school if she gets in and gets significant money in April which is doubtful. thanks everyone!!! Glad you’re helping trim down my plans 🙂
  15. we are definitely not eligible as our EFC is extremely high. However, we definitely will continue to submit the Fafsa Because we opted for a small amount of Parent Plus loans and they require the fafsa to have been submitted first. 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻
  16. Hah, good point! I think I will do just the two I know we can afford during our summer visit to PA/NJ ...keep it simple...(we are going to PSU Main campus in the spring separately which will be fun on every level cause we get to visit her brother too!) We didn't have to do any last minute visits last year because ds got accepted to PennState in January and didn't get accepted to Carnegie Mellon or Cornell which were his only two he would have probably preferred. Thank God we didn't shell out money to travel around randomly! BEFORE he got accepted to PennState, we took a winter trip to PA area for UPenn, Villanova, and a few others that I can't remember now and they were really FUN but really COLD and it was a lot of money, and he totally randomly got a concussion in the mix due to being sleep deprived and a low beam above the stairs in my grandma's house that anyone over 5'9" has to duck for. SO basically, it was a very weird expensive visit for nothing that changed the course of his entire semester due to concussion. We had done UC Davis in the summer and Santa Clara U as well since it's nearby in good weather and way beforehand....so looking back that extra money was rather pointless... So it's a little different because these extra schools would be included and lumped into the Summer Intensive and see grandma visit. but they would make it more stressful with trying to get to more schools...one things for sure I am NOT flying over there in February!! haha!!! With my luck we will surely have a Vortex and icy roads. 🙂
  17. THis is for applying next year but we will be visiting this summer after Junior Year: Two of the private colleges we have on dd's list are out of the question unless she gets significant merit aid- absolute minimum of 15K... We will be visiting some OOS colleges in spring and or summer, and I am thinking of leaving these out of the visit, but having her apply. Then if she miraculously gets a huge scholarship we could always spring for the last minute plane tickets to run over there in April of 2021. ?? Both schools don't really publish the stats for their regular Institution Scholarships which, from what I am reading on college confidential, average 12-15K (Not Dean's but the regular ones)....My dd's SAT scores will be above the top 75th percentile, but no AP's to speak of and not an amazingly "involved" student. Ran a Book Club for a year, does Student Government, and Library Service that's really about it, although she does work at a very adult and high responsibility summer job, and have about a 3.8 GPA. As an art student, she's not a super exciting candidate either - as pre-Med, pre-law or Sciences at both schools are more advertised and focused on. I am thinking so as not to get hopes up or set unreal expectations, to leave it off the Visit List, but have her apply. If they THEN throw a huge scholarship at her and she feels it's worth a look then we'd spring for the plane tickets to get out there in April.... Has anyone made long distance out of state last minute visits in April? Was it super stressful or fun?
  18. Stephens threw my son a huge scholarship. He chose PennState Main campus - it‘a more well known around the world whereas Stephens is kind of east coast. But I really really liked so many things about Stephens, and I feel it would have been a good fit. Maybe your dd will get some merit money too.
  19. Just check the rules. Two campuses are not “most” either. a more accurate word might be “many”
  20. Also in the rainy and wet winter climates there is very little time for use of bikes. And also they might provide a free campus bus link.
  21. Most campuses do not allow scooters, or skateboards or anything other than a bike which would have to be ridden on the roads. ....you need to check the rules and also find out if there are decent bike lanes. Some campuses are awesome for bicycling but many are an accident waiting to happen. At my sons campus there have already been three bike/car accidents This year and those are only the ones I know of. When it’s busy and kids trying to get from A to B scooter ands skateboards are extremely rude and dangerous. There just isn’t room for the faster moving objects to make it through the crowds.
  22. Congrats to everyone, so far really exciting stuff to read! Also community college and saving money too! My kids are ready to “get outa dodge” by this age but If yours is happy and content at home it’s so awesome to save money and enjoy the next step whatever that is.
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