I know this is a really "old" post, but I feel it is worth an udpate seeing how the Maxwell family still has conferences and I know people are doing research before attending and coming across this board. We first heard of them almost 3 years ago. We were at a homeschool conference and our 9yr old daughter at that time saw a book with a golden retriever on the cover at a vendor's booth. We had recently moved and left a beloved golden retriever behind so she was particularly attracted to it. After a quick scan, we bought it for her. This was the first in the series of the Moody books. She really enjoyed the book and when we heard they would be in a nearby town doing a conference, we went (the conference was near the end of 2012). We enjoyed the conference very much, finding it both challenging and encouraging. Seeing their family interaction, and actually speaking with them all was such a blessing for us. A little over a year later we went to another one of their conferences. They get many, many emails from people who are heart-broken over their relationship with a spouse and/or their children. We could see how the Maxwell's genuinely care for these families and ours and desire to help spare people from that and help people change course who are in that situation or heading down that path. It seemed very clear to us they were not preaching a thou-shalt message, but sharing from their heart and pleading for us to consider it well. We did not feel any judgmental type of attitude coming from them. Just a desire to share their experience and knowledge and encourage us to consider and live intentionally and with purpse in what we choose to do (I do believe they share it strongly, but because they believe so strongly about it and care about people so much). A couple of months ago we went and spent a weekend in their home. 6 kids are still living there, the others live very close by. We went to church with them as well, in the assisted living facility. There were at least 8 families there in addition to all the residents. They spent a lot of time visiting with the elderly before and after the service. It is truly a ministry opportunity for them. There are no expenses so they do not take any collection. Instead they encourage everyone to support other missionaries, Gospel for Asia, the needy around them, and so on. This is especially neat to me, as they could certainly justify collecting for their sound equipment, the preaching of the word, and the music ministers. But, it's beautiful that it is just their way of ministering as a family and freeing up all those funds to go out into other areas of ministry. During our stay with them we did some work together, ate many meals together, talked and shared many things together, went to church together, ministered together, and their kids even played games with our kids :) They are very evangelistic. They minister in many ways to their neighbors and people they meet in public at grocery stores and such. Their children have many skills, and are extremely talented in many things, from construction, to music, to computers, to cooking...and it is not like certain skill set for the boys and certain skill set for the girls...they were all doing it all. I understand some people just don't get them and their views. I understand people's concerns. I realize their message can be seen as judgmental and extreme. However, our experience is such that we greatly value and appreciate their ministry and we have some pretty close and recent first-hand experience to say their family has made some decisions that are worth considering.

We just paid too much for a kirby vacuum. Anyone else want to let me know they are part of that club too so I can feel better? :grouphug:

we have our house up for sale...so we won't be starting a garden anytime soon :(

I would inquire about what version of the Bible they use and what verses they are using for their understanding of that. Then thank them and go research it and see if you can understand their POV better and also help you to further your POV and then possibly dialogue more about it with them if there be any reason to.

sad, huh! and they'll probably have a lot of money in damages because of all the time delay and then try to blame you for that.

Good thing we aren't neighbors, we'd never figure things out :) Our carrots last year looked like string beans. The birds got all the sunflower seeds before we got any. Now we moved to a new state and planted 2 peach trees right away...which the deer quickly destroyed. I'm pressing on though and will try some more.

I don't have any great insights or ideas, but I can share my experience which hopefully at the least will make your current situation not seem so bad. I was homeschooled from 2nd-6th grade. I was never excited about it or went around telling all or anything like that. And, we even got to travel to many great places which I really enjoyed such as cosi and Thomas Edison's Winter Home. I was much like your kids. Just get through it. I ended up doing fine in Jr. High, High School, and College and became pretty successful at a fortune 500 company. I still didn't enjoy "learning" but because I did like the outcome of the learning, I self-taught computer programming along the way. I had hopes our kids would really enjoy school. We have some fun moments and things that are fun in school, but most of it seems to be just get through it. I guess my main point is if it never changes, I think it can still work out ok. A big difference between me and my kids is I did/do not like reading, and they love it. I'm very glad for this. We also find things they are interested in and try to focus more on that and incorporate it into the learning.

thankfully this sort of thing has come up during discussions at our house before it became an issue. So, we have some grounding in case it ever starts to happen. If it does happen, I'll start with questions and try to get an understanding from their point of view and then work to change it. For example: (of course, words and tones have a lot of meaning that can be hard to capture with just text.) q: 'Did you write the number 17 because you thought that is what I wanted or because you were just trying to be funny?'. a1: 'uh, you said write 17 so that is what I did' - to me, if they were trying to be smart alec or not at this point, their words/expression would be enough to tell me they are being rude/disrespectful so time for discipline. a2: 'I thought it was what you wanted. That is what you told me to do' q: 'ok, I believe you and appreciate your obedience. Can you think of what else I could have meant?' a1: 'no' - then it would be time to add some critical thinking / reasoning books and assignments to their coursework. a2: 'I guess you could have wanted me to write out the problem given for number 17' 'yes, good thinking. Just like when I ask you to clear the table, I do not mean to just swipe everything off onto the floor, but to put things away where they belong and wash the table. So, it would help me to help you if you put more effort and thought into this as we go on'. ...

I heard that produce crops will be a lot more expensive this year because the winter weather was more intense and widespread causing loss of many crops. So, less supply = more cost. The informer of this also suggested planting your own garden because of this. Anybody planning on doing a garden this year because it will be too expensive otherwise?

This post inspired me to think of something better we could start doing. Here is what I got: Make red and white popcorn balls (a little popcorn, food coloring, and caramel). Give them to neighbors (or anyone else) with a card that explains red=Christ's blood, white=how God sees us, and that God loved us so much...and we wanted to share His love with them on Valentine's day.

Oh, great post!! We have two traditions: 1. go out for ice cream as a family 2. have a scripture memory recitation with other homeschool families They don't really tie in to your "particular" request, so I look forward to ideas from others.

It doesn't sound to me like you have a good enough reason to leave, so I would work on myself if I was in that place and go from there. If I did have good enough reason, I would start having some good discussions with the kids and work through it together, taking some time to do so. Ultimately doing what is best for the family and that would be best for the kids, though it may be very difficult. There is much in the process on either side, such as prayer, but I think other often overlooked and under-considered are fasting and Bible reading. A good process will lead you to the right path and help you down that path.

I think I get what you are saying and can see the problem with the post then. My attempt was to relate the statement (with the idea that not fitting in or relating is a bad thing) to Christ. So, maybe instead: "Did Christ relate to the masses?" That can still imply that my kid is like Christ and the other kids are the unwashed masses but the intent is to challenge the thought of this teacher expressed in the statement. However, if there is a situation where my kid is acting in a way that is like Christ, I would promote it (though careful as to what promote actually would play out as).

even if puke didn't bother me I'd be staying home. I do not roll well with that type of frustration (kids sick in car) so I will avoid it when I can. I can handle it better if it just happens, but to take the chance and then if they get sick I would be too upset. Not worth it to me. Of course, you could just name it and claim it and curse the sickness demon that has entered your house and...(yup, that smell is a nice fresh can of open worms) :)

""My only fear is that she will have a problem relating to other teens."" I sure would love to know the reason for that thought and then start considering and replying to that, instead of just replying to that alone. Otherwise, seems like a lot of assumptions get made. On the other hand, assumptions to a comment like that, especially following the compliment made, are most likely very accurate. So, I would love to be able to get faster at responses and not think of all the good ones later, but perhaps I could get lucky enough to at least come up with "no worries there, she can relate well with them. They may have a very difficult time relating to her. You know, like Christ could relate very well with the masses, but the masses could not relate to Him at all."

Yet another reminder why I love not having TV. Although, I do agree that it is not surprising coming from the world, and if I did have to see it (and my kids as well), I would use it for learning. Yet, I also agree that it is awful and they should hear the displeasure of it.

I figured if I hang around well trained minds, my mind might get trained well.

I have loved the old yellow (maybe they don't start out yellow :) egg carton type pads. I can not find them anymore and then saw the gel. I tried the memory foam before but it was way too hot and did not relieve pain like the old kind. I might have to give the gel a try. It's at costco and if I don't like it, I'll just have to return it (like we did the memory foam). But, I'd rather get the old type if I could find it since I know it worked for me and was much cheaper.

One idea would be to consider some ministries you enjoy and contact them to see if they could use your family. Maybe International Alert Academy could use a family for service type projects on location. Maybe Gospel for Asia could benefit from your family coming in to help take care of a family that volunteers for them but is having some major medical issues or injury. Maybe Focus on the Family is going to be doing a city wide outreach for spring break.

looks like kids are 13 and 9...? Seems like at that age, you could have a meaningful conversation with them about it. Explaining to them how you were treated growing up and what you felt and wanting to make sure that you do not end up doing the same thing. Welcome their feedback and feelings along the way and see if what you are doing is making them feel that way. I thinking pointing it out straight is good, and not shameful, but tone and facial expression can make a big impact. Of course, praising them is a good counter measure too: "looked like you made a great effort there. it was done incorrectly. can you see how it should be done?" or something along those lines.

vinegar tip sounds good. Does it matter if it is light or dark wood when using vinegar? Thanks!

I see no problem with stated scenario. I would be very concerned if there were video games, cable/satellite TV, internet...

based on your cons list, I would take them. I would not tolerate bored/tired remarks. A little upfront coaching, some interactive upfront planning/preparation (things to do, goals, fun things to look forward to...), and some prethought discipline would be in order if I were in that situation.

It seems to me that "repeating" 3rd grade wouldn't really be repeating. From what I read she isn't doing "3rd grade" work and so is not really in the 3rd grade. Since she is aware of being in 3rd grade, I would not move her on to 4th and then work at her level. What happens when someone (kid or adult) asks her what grade she is in and then they see that she doesn't know some things that most kids in that grade know? I would have a conversation with my child and explain the situation and that there is nothing wrong with repeating a grade and that the grade is just a guide and you care more about them working hard than knowing it all and getting it all right and....