See, I see saying "could you hand me that glass?" to someone as being way more polite than "hand me that glass." For one thing, the question lets someone answer "oh, I can't, my hands are full." Which is perfectly acceptable. If I said that to my child and they responded that way, I would say "I didn't realize, I'll get it in a minute" or "well, put your video game down and get it!" It's an opening to a dialogue- not an executive order. And if I am talking to an adult- it IS a request, I don't give orders to anyone aside from my kids or other kids who I am specifically in charge of.

Oh, he does know exactly what I want. It's hard to let go of the "nice" way of saying things, because basically, I feel like I'm walking around barking orders all the time. And he does not respond well to directness either. He gets mad and turns it into a confrontation. I'm trying to avoid the confrontation by letting him know what I want without confrontation.

Ds always does the exact opposite of what I tell him to do. It's always when I say things in a nice, lighthearted way. Last night, he'd been playing outside barefoot and came in and jumped on my bed. I laughingly, said "oh, yuck, gross feet! Don't put gross feet on my bed!" He started rubbing his feet on the bed. (Referencing another thread) if he poured a ton of chocolate sauce on his ice cream, I would respond "whoa, buddy, easy on the sauce", he would grab the sauce and put more on. Why does he do this? How can I change to get different results. I have tried to train myself to not say things that sound like requests "can you put your shoes away?" As opposed to "put your shoes away now" Because anything said in a question form is answered with a "no". It is really hard to change these speech patterns because they are so ingrained. It was always considered more polite to say things as a question when I was growing up, and it has never been a problem for me before now. He has no obvious "issues", he has had no trauma in his life, Any ideas on how I can deal with this? He's 8, but he's been like this for at least 3 years. He does have other behavior issues, but I'd like to try to tackle this first.

Well, I go to bed early, but I don't fall asleep early. After I put the 2 year old to bed, I just don't have it in me to walk back downstairs, so I usually just lay down. (Dh is in charge of putting the other 2 to bed, and he's usually still doing that.) But I play on the computer, watch Netflix, or read. If I can talk myself into walking back downstairs, I get a snack to bring back up. Sometimes, I try to talk dh into bringing me something!

I don't have teens, but I saw an organizing tip on Pinterest that might be helpful. The pin showed dollar store plastic bins in the cabinets with everything for a particular meal inside- all the ingredients for each recipe. Maybe if you did that and kept a couple shelves in the fridge as "meal" shelves and a couple as "snack" shelves, that would help?

Our co-op had a mom's night out where we all brought snacks and our curriculum and we browsed through each other's stuff. It was awesome!

I'm sorry that happened to you. I was yelled at one time for not "separating my items". I had no clue what the guy was talking about, so I just kinda stood there and stared at him. He finally realized that I wasn't paying with EBT or WIC or whatever makes you separate things out and mumbled an apology. I remember being so taken aback that I didn't do anything. If that happened to me today, I would talk to a manager. Not because he was rude to me, but because he obviously thought it was okay to be rude to people using assistance. I had run out late at night to pick up candy to bribe my potty training toddler and also grabbed some staples that we were low on, like bread and milk. There wasn't anyone behind me or anything, but I still remember feeling embarassed walking out to my car and also feeling mad at myself for feeling embarassed. Dang, emotions are complicated!

I have never been asked that and I use debit 98% of the time. That part must be a location thing. But seriously, I realize that I am not the most observant person in the world- I have numerous examples of things I should have noticed and didn't. But still. I just can't imagine noticing how someone was paying. I can't imagine knowing someone was paying attention to how I was paying. Sure, I have been irritated when things are taking forever- but it is usually because something doesn't have a tag or whatever or there's some issue that takes two cashiers to figure out. I would never be rude to someone about it, but that I can understand people's irritation about that. I was involved in a Facebook discussion not too long ago where people were talking about this. I mentioned there that I couldn't imagine people noticing other payment methods and someone seriously responded with "I always notice, banks use different colors" and she seriously started telling me which bank used which color. My mind was blown that someone could seriously care that much about it. I thought she needed to get a life.

That woman is a b*tch. I have never seen this happen. If I did, I sincerely hope that I would be able to overcome my shock quickly enough to give that woman a piece of my mind. How did she even know that was how he was paying? How would anyone know unless they were close enough to read the card. And NO ONE should be invading a person's personal space so much that they can read their card. My heart hurts for people who have faced this attitude.

I was a kid who didn't ride for a long time. I was scared of falling. My parents tried all kinds of things to get me to learn. Then, one day, someone was visiting and she wanted to ride bikes and I was not going to admit that I couldn't do it. So I just got on and rode. My dad came home while we were riding down the alley. He just looked at me with a shocked expression, but he didn't say anything. My point is, he may pick it up very quickly when he is motivated. I would try to make the effort to get to the park regularly.

I've got sensory issues too, though probably not as bad as yours. I have been known to wear earplugs. You can still hear the kids, but it's not as jarring. I also have hyperactive kids and trampolines have been life-savers. We have a 7 ft one in the basement. 30-60 minutes of jumping helps them not be bouncing off the walls later. Quiet time- everyone in a different area with a book or audiobook.

There were a couple of years where color, cut, paste activities were my dd's favorite thing in the entire world. I couldn't keep up with providing her with those things. There was plenty of worth for her just in entertainment value.

I wish I knew! My just turned 2 yo has been picking up shoes from all over the house and carrying them to the shoe bin by the back door. It seems as if he can figure it out then the 5 and 8 year olds should be able to do it too!!

I wouldn't give up on the babysitting idea just because he is a boy! If he is interested in babysitting- put the word out that he's available! I am always looking for a teenage sitter and I'd be fine with a boy. My MIL looked specifically for male sitters when dh was little- 30 years ago!- because she had triplet boys.

My dd was just asking me why we moved into our house (she was too little to remember before the move). And I have to say that I would NOT move back to the house we were in for anything. It was tiny, didn't have a/c, didn't have a dishwasher, 2 square feet of counter space, the layout was horrible. Of course, we were renting, so we couldn't make huge changes. Now I live in an almost perfect house in an almost perfect neighborhood (for me- lots of people could find things to be unhappy abut here.) Only about 8 blocks away from where we rented before. I just don't think I could be happy with the kitchen I had before, even in a perfect location.

My kids do have pajamas. My 8 yo wears running pants or basketball shorts to bed most of the time. I have lots of pjs that I never wear to bed! I cannot sleep in long sleeves or long pants- I HATE the way the fabric twists in bed. So I wear shorts and a tank to bed all year. But during the winter, it is too cold to wear that while sitting around eating breakfast or watching TV before bed, so I change into pjs to be comfortable and then right before bed, switch to my shorts/tank. In the summer, I don't mind lounging around in the shorts/tank.

The beast academy books have games in their "recess" sections. Some of them could work.

A couple things spring to mind. One time, I said "oh, he didn't really do that- he's not that stupid." About my brother. In front of him. When I realized he actually DID do it, I felt so awful. I felt awful about it for years. Then one day, the subject came up again in convo with him and I apologized for having said that. He had forgotten. Didn't even remember when I reminded him of it. He thought it was hilarious that I was apologizing for something he didn't even remember. Another incident, which isn't exactly the same- my mom was here when my youngest was born. He was a few days old and I was feeling very overwhelmed. I said "I don't know how I am every going to manage to leave the house again." My mom looked around at the chaos and children and said "honey, I don't know either." I know she was trying to be sympathetic, but my visceral reaction was to pack up those kids and head to a museum. And I probably would have, if the convo hadn't happened at 8:00 at night! The conversation made me realize that when people tell me I cannot do something, I WILL do it. If she had said "oh, honey, of course you will, lots of people manage this and you can too" I probably would have continued wallowing in self-pity. There are a few worse ones that I don't want to mention. I had a convo similar to what I think prompted this thread not very long ago. I had met a homeschool mom and we were doing the "how many kids, how old are your kids" small talk and she said her oldest was 19. I was shocked and said "wow, you don't look old enough to have a 19 year old." She said she wasn't. She and her now-husband had both been widowed and the older kids were his from his first marriage. I did say sorry for your loss, etc. But later, I went over and over it in my mind. I didn't know if I handled it correctly. I didn't feel like I said enough- but I'm not sure where the line is drawn between saying enough to express your sympathy and acknowledge it without dwelling on it.

Yes, they can. That's what they told me after the 2nd. But after the 3rd, they advised not having any more kids (which was a moot point for me, I had already asked for my tubes to be tied since they were already in there). I probably would have had serious complications if I had not had the c/s. I am thankful for my c/s. (though I was upset after the first- not because I felt like it was unnecessary, but because I had an ideal in my head and it didn't happen)

Wow. I kindof feel like I should stand up for the OBs! They are not all bad. My first was an emergency c/s. He was a week late and when we arrived at the hospital the nurse was all friendly and chatty and laid-back but the minute she hooked me up to the monitors, she started yelling for other nurses/doctors. The doc came and said we need to get this baby out now. She said it very calmly, and I distinctly had the vibe that she was trying not to freak me out. Everything turned out fine- but he had pooped before he was born and had inhaled it. They had called docs from peds too- there was a whole team of people in the room just for him. Before my next one was born, we had moved. The OBs at the practice here said I was welcome to try for a VBAC, but when my due date came and went, they said they didn't want me to go more than a week past, so I had a c/s scheduled. When I arrived for the c/s, and they hooked me up to the monitors, they said that I had started contracting and I could hold off on the c/s and wait if I wanted. I opted to go ahead with the c/s because I had mentally prepared for it and didn't want to change plans again. Afterwards, they told me it was a good thing because my uterine wall was very thin. The 3rd was t the same practice as the 2nd nd they were very upfront that they would not consider a VBAC since I had 2 previous c/s. They were upfront about that at the very first appointment, so I could have found another doc if I wanted. After the 3rd, they told me I shouldn't have any more kids. Apparently, my uterus was so thin, it was see-through. I already knew I was done having kids, so it wasn't upsetting. Anyway, all this to say that I did not feel bullied into anything and there are good OBs out there.

I have covered boxes with duct tape for my kids to use as boxes like that. But that probably isn't the look you are going for! I would cover it with fabric- wrap it like a present and hot glue the edges to the inside.

Does anyone know if the Spiderwick chronicle movie is based on the first book or the whole series? I tried to google it, but couldn't figure that out. Thanks!

You know how exciting it is when a new box of books arrives for the new school year? Well, as I was ordering the things I need for next year- I realized that 1st grade dd isn't getting much. The 4th grader is getting tons of stuff. I want her to have something new for herself. But since I already have 95% of her curriculum, I'm looking for something that won't take a ton of time or be terribly expensive. Any great ideas?

I always do a double-take when I see high-school classmates pics on Facebook! They look so old! But they are my age! And some who had kids early are posting about their kids high school graduations, meanwhile, I am changing diapers.

I would not think anything of it. I probably wouldn't even notice. I don't own a hair dryer, but I shower at night.