Thank you board family for all the love and prayers and good thoughts. My dd’s twins were born at 28 weeks weighing 2lbs 10oz. They spent almost 3 very long months in the NICU, and I spent those long months in UT away from the rest of my family. So here they are at home and so happy to be there: In true WTM fashion Eliza is reading about astronomers and Freya is reading about Earth Science.

I think this has been harder than when I brought my own newborns home! Both girls are 4lbs! Not too bad for starting at 2lbs 10 oz. They have had tub baths, breathed room air, tried non-nutritive nursing, had brain scans, lung scans & eye exams. The most frustrating part has been when something is hinky, “This area of her lungs is cloudy” ”Their eye development seems to be delayed for their age and there is some swelling” The recommendations is always “wait & see.” That is my least favorite medical plan! Because COVID cases are spiking here the NICU has changed their visitor plan last week, so that only one parent gets to visit at a time and for a limited time. My SIL had a sore throat for 2 days last week so they required that he get COVID tested and both my Dd & SIL had to wait for the results before going back to the NICU. It was a very long 4 days. The test was negative and Dd was out the door on her way to the NICU almost before SIL hung up the phone. She got to hold them at the same time For the first time. Freya told her dad all about her first tub bath through interpretive dance with a surprise punch in the nose at the end. I have baked lactation cookies, lactation muffins, lactation baked oatmeal and lactation brownies, but have done zero of my school planning for Fall. Amber in SJ

The girls are growing well. Both are 3lbs now. They have been moved down to a ventilator that “reminds” them to breathe instead of a ventilator that breathes for them. I still haven’t been able to meet them in person, but I am taking care of my Dd & SIL as best I can. Both girls got shots today to increase their red blood cells. Eliza has her binky, so she isn’t too bothered, but Freya looks very concerned. Freya is also giving the Hulk pose.

That’s it! Thank you

Hi all, I have been making someone here’s fabulous baked oatmeal recipe for a couple of years now, but right now I am in another state far away from my recipes cooking for my daughter & her husband during the few breaks they have from the NICU. She is being encouraged to eat oats to support breast feeding, so I thought the baked oatmeal would be great but it turns out I don’t have the recipe memorized. I have tried searching but to no avail. I tried another recipe yesterday, but it was not as good, so I am begging if someone has that long ago posted recipe to help me out.

Hi all, I have been making someone here’s fabulous baked oatmeal recipe for a couple of years now, but right now I am in another state far away from my recipes cooking for my daughter & her husband during the few breaks they have from the NICU. She is being encouraged to eat oats to support breast feeding, so I thought the baked oatmeal would be great but it turns out I don’t have the recipe memorized. I have tried searching but to no avail. I tried another recipe yesterday, but it was not as good, so I am begging if someone has that long ago posted recipe to help me out.

The girls are doing well. One doctor said Freya doesn’t seem to know that she was born early and is small. Eliza is struggling to fully inflate her lungs but wait and see seems to be the usual NICU mode, which I totally understand. Yesterday they were one week old so my baby got to hold her baby for the first time. pictures 1 & 2 are Freya’s feet doing baby ballet and pictures 3 & 4 are Eliza holding her own binky and giving the stink eye if you are coming to change her tiny diaper. I am still waiting to meet them. Amber in SJ

After a few days in the hospital, DD went into labor at 28 weeks and 2days. I hopped on a plane but they didn’t wait for Grandma and arrived via c-section before I did weighing 2lbs 10 oz each. Both started on a ventilator, but have since been moved to a NIPP-V, which is less invasive. No one can hold them yet and thanks to COVID protocols I don’t even get to see them in the NICU, but my Dd has been FaceTiming me so I can see them. One hates to be swaddled and wriggles herself free and then pulls her tiny hat off. She also removed her umbilical line so they had to put a tiny PICC line in her tiny arm. The other baby is more chill but doesn’t like the nasal cannula that comes with the NIPP-V and soon discovered if she repeatedly opens her mouth wide in a fake yawn she can work the little poky things out of her nose. photos are: Freya the Wiggly, Eliza the Calm and Eliza holding her Momma’s finger It is going to be a loooong Summer. Hopefully I will get to meet them sooner rather than later Amber in SJ

This will be full of crass talk about money so look away if you must Before getting pregnant my dd had 2.5 part time jobs. One with the local public school as the reading specialist where she worked 1 hour less than they would be required to give her benefits, another job with the same public school running the after school program, again no benefits and the .5 being the 2 hours/ day from 4-6am she spends online teaching English to kids in other countries. Her husband worked the maximum allowed 28 hours/ week on campus while finishing his Masters. Because she is turning 26 in June and thus will be off our insurance which only offers her emergency services because she is in another state, she went to the exchange and got on a plan that costs her just over $400/ month. Just her, as her husband pays $500/ semester at the school for his insurance. Fast forward to today and she is pregnant with twins and in the hospital for the next 6 weeks until the babies are born. The nice insurance person came in today and told them that the cost for her to stay in the hospital is $8K/ day (!) but her current plan has an OOP cap of $6K/ year......wait for it....per person, so when the babies arrive it will be an additional $6K/ baby. The woman told her to apply for Medicaid and everything would be covered.....wait for it.....unless her husband got a job. Even a part time job at the grocery store, if he makes more then some ridiculously low amount then they would lose the Medicaid and have to re-enroll in another insurance. The woman told them if they qualify for Medicaid, then their best bet is for her husband to not get a job until the babies are born and out of the NICU. But who is going to pay their rent? Their bills? They have some savings but not enough for months of no income. aaarrrggghhh OK, I am better now Amber in SJ

This will be full of crass talk about money so look away if you must Before getting pregnant my dd had 2.5 part time jobs. One with the local public school as the reading specialist where she worked 1 hour less than they would be required to give her benefits, another job with the same public school running the after school program, again no benefits and the .5 being the 2 hours/ day from 4-6am she spends online teaching English to kids in other countries. Her husband worked the maximum allowed 28 hours/ week on campus while finishing his Masters. Because she is turning 26 in June and thus will be off our insurance which only offers her emergency services because she is in another state, she went to the exchange and got on a plan that costs her just over $400/ month. Just her, as her husband pays $500/ semester at the school for his insurance. Fast forward to today and she is pregnant with twins and in the hospital for the next 6 weeks until the babies are born. The nice insurance person came in today and told them that the cost for her to stay in the hospital is $8K/ day (!) but her current plan has an OOP cap of $6K/ year......wait for it....per person, so when the babies arrive it will be an additional $6K/ baby. The woman told her to apply for Medicaid and everything would be covered.....wait for it.....unless her husband got a job. Even a part time job at the grocery store, if he makes more then some ridiculously low amount then they would lose the Medicaid and have to re-enroll in another insurance. The woman told them if they qualify for Medicaid, then their best bet is for her husband to not get a job until the babies are born and out of the NICU. But who is going to pay their rent? Their bills? They have some savings but not enough for months of no income. aaarrrggghhh OK, I am better now Amber in SJ

They have applied & been denied. Their landlord sent them a letter saying because they reside in a state that was never officially closed, he is under no obligation to waive payment and/ or late fees. And that everyone’s rent is due on the first, late on the third as usual. Nice, huh? It was a form letter to all the rental properties but considering they have never been late it seemed a little harsh. But we are trying to focus on getting everyone here and healthy. tomorrow she gets to have the cool 3D ultrasound because the doctor can’t “find” the membrane that separated the babies earlier in the pregnancy. If it has ruptured or disappeared (?) that puts the other baby at risk and she will be confined to bed for the rest of the time. Right now she can get up and use the restroom, sit in a chair, or walk down the hall with her IV pole. amber in SJ

My pregnant dd was admitted to the hospital last night at barely 29 weeks pregnant because the amniotic sac around one twin has ruptured. She is receiving steroid shots to rapidly mature the babies’ lungs and now we get to play the waiting game in the hospital until the babies are born. Best case scenario is everyone sits tight for the next 5 weeks and they are delivered at 34 weeks, and then get to hang out in the NICU for a few weeks. Even with the best outcome this could be devastating for them financially because both of them are unemployed due to COVID, but are ineligible for unemployment. This grandma is about a thousand miles away from her baby and grand babies in the hospital and the other grandparents are in another country! Please send your positive thoughts and prayers for stay-put babies and calm hearts all around. Amber in SJ

Speaking of teenage boys and their appetites.... Late last night (10:30 pm) I noticed the back corner of an egg carton was squished and 2 of the eggs inside were broken, so I decided to cook the remaining eggs right away. I could do make ahead scrambles for breakfast sandwiches, or hard boil for snacks. Seeing the light was still on in the boy’s room, I opened the door a bit and asked, “If I hardboil some eggs will you eat them?” He said yes immediately so I got started. About 10 minutes later he came out of his room and sat down at the table. I asked him what he was doing and he said, “Waiting for the eggs to be done.” He ate 4 and went to bed. I guess I wasn’t clear that I was making eggs for the next day. I didn’t think I needed to be any clearer. Amber in SJ

I got the kids KanJam for Easter. It is a frisbee game. They have played several times a week in the backyard since its arrival. The “kans” arrive flat and have to be made into rounds, so they can also travel flat or rolled up. I ordered from Amazon and while it can be a bit pricey the trick is to look at all the different options. Some of them have flags on them, some of them have different college or professional sport teams, or other options. Some of these less popular options are as low as $20. No matter what you order the “kan” is solid black or white and the options are stickers you add on. So if the cheapest option is a college team you have never heard of, get that one and leave the sticker off 🙂. Some of the stickers are peeling off of ours already. I would also advise getting an inexpensive pack of frisbees. White ones with frisbees in the wedding colors if you can find them would be cute. Or giant beer pong. For the wedding you could use white or wedding colored buckets & balls. Amber in SJ

The limit 4 is on coupon usage and shows up during check out. The coupon is for $3 off paper products (limit 4) so it can be applied to multi packs and that is considered a single item, but the best deal is to apply it to 4 of the single reams that are $5 each. Both the Hammermill Copy Plus and the HP Office20 are both showing as $5/ 500 page ream, but you can apply the coupon to any of the paper products shown. amber in SJ

Staples.com is running a deal on 500 sheet reams of paper for $5 limit 4 Stack with coupon code 22700 for $3 off each ream. https://www.staples.com/zq9zq9copy-printer-paper/cat_CL140691/olxzk?icid=LPB:PPR:1RM We are trying to reduce the amount of paper we use, but we still use some. Amber in SJ

They thought that would be the case, but they both applied and the stated reason for turning him down were: As a grad student he worked 20 hours/ week as a TA & lab assistant (a weird thing about BYU is there is a cap on how many hours you can work as a student) and that wasn’t enough hours/earnings to get unemployment and he has had his “green card” for less than a year. Before that he had a student visa. My daughter (a citizen) applied and the reasons given for turning her down were: As a special category teacher, her work is “seasonal” and just ended, she was not laid off and because she is on limited activity, due to being pregnant with twins, the unemployment office declared her “unavailable to work” and therefore ineligible for unemployment. It seems like if there is a crack to fall into they have fallen into it. Amber in SJ

This seems like such a mess. I was one of the ones complaining that we got nothing for our Dd who turned 17 in Dec of 2019, and not nay did we get nothing for our college age daughter who we claimed as a dependent, but she got nothing even though she worked and paid/ filed taxes. My oldest daughter and her husband each got the full amount even though he is not a citizen (permanent resident) which is an incredible blessing because his job ended in April, hers ended in May, neither is eligible for unemployment and they are expecting twins in August. Last night I had a virtual conversation on FB with a woman who was ranting that immigrants shouldn’t get stimulus $$ when hard working citizens like herself get nothing. When I tried to figure out why she thought she was ineligible, it finally came out that she is self-employed and has not paid or filed any taxes for years. Somehow I don’t think it is the fault of immigrants that the IRS doesn’t know where to send her check. Amber in SJ

Dh is a mechanical engineer at a large-ish biotech firm. Because their machines are being used in healthcare the manufacturing department is still going to work, but Dh is in R & D so he has been home since 3/17. Those who are at work are able to maintain social distance, because only about 1/3 of the bldg is being used. Everyone must wear masks in common areas and more frequent cleaning protocols are in place. Dd 22 works at a residence home. All of the residents are in their rooms, unless a PC (personal care) assistant is taking them for exercise. A few weeks ago they gave my dd a paper surgical style mask in a paper bag and that is her PPE for the week 🙄. They told her no gloves because it is upsetting to the residents 🙄🙄 Last November she moved out of our house into the tiny house that Dh built for her in our backyard. She keeps herself isolated out there to avoid bringing anything home to my high risk Dh. I buy her groceries & leave her meals in her refrigerator. I make sure to talk to her by text or Alexa everyday. Amber in SJ

I had a lovely family member put this article on my FB page today. My reply was “Oh no! A homeschooled child could be abused! Homeschooling should not be allowed. It is a good thing abuse could never happen if all those homeschoolers enrolled in public school” and then I added this link https://www.investors.com/politics/editorials/media-and-unions-tamp-down-news-of-children-abused-by-teachers/ just for fun not only is my “turn the other cheek” button broken, my “ignore the stupid” button seems to be malfunctioning as well. Amber in SJ

Sadly enough our 17yo dd got her drivers license 6 days before the county SIP order. Dh put her on the insurance to the tune of an additional $200/month, but we pay annually so he paid for the six months until our renewal all at once, and she has driven the car exactly 2 times since getting her license. Oh yeah that $30 back from Allstate for her part of April & May seem like a drop in a big stupid bucket. Amber in SJ

Well, I don’t know if you are referring to me, but our AGI is under the $200,000 limit, so we got less than 10% of what it would have been if it had been based on our 2018 AGI, where we would have received 100%. The drop off between getting 100% at $150K to 0% at $200K is pretty sharp. As I explained there were mitigating circumstances that led to our AGI being almost double what it has been in our highest earning year and even though that increase didn’t lead to an influx of cash due to the very high tax rate for the one time gain as well as the gain that was to be had was rolled into our 401k that just got flushed down the toilet with everyone else’s. We live in one of highest COL areas of the US and one of the areas that has been hit hardest by COVID-19. We have 2 children who fall into the 17+ hole of not getting money for themselves and us not getting any money for them. Our income has definitely been affected by all of this and will definitely have an effect for many years to come. It will even have an effect of whether or not Dh can retire when we planned. As for my job title? Mine is the same as many on the boards, homeschooling mom. My Dh is a mechanical engineer in R & D at a small biotech firm, not a project manager, not a VP or a supervising engineer. And if you think that we make too much for me to complain about not getting a larger stimulus check, let’s discuss what housing, food, insurance and even gas cost here compared to where you live and then you can tell me how you would trade your 100% stimulus check for my AGI. Amber in SJ

We are going to receive little or nothing and I am super irritated Our 22 yo college attending, multiple health challenges dd is stil claimed as a dependent on our taxes so she gets nothing & we get nothing. Our middle dd turned 17 mid-Dec of 2019 so nothing for her. After years of barely paying their employees Dh’s company was finally sold in 2019 and stock options, PTO & any unused vacation time had to be paid out therefore on paper Dh made more than double what he made the year before, even though it was all so heavily taxed or rolled into our 401K which just took a nose dive, that we didn’t see a big cash influx, but it put us over the top of receiving the full stimulus payment. Amber in SJ

I haven’t read all the responses, but because I live in a state with and official SIP and my adult daughter lives in a state where they are just relying on common sense (🙄) one of the things I have noticed is that without the official label there is no protection for those who need to shelter in place because they are in a high risk category. For example, my daughter is in a high risk category because she has asthma and is pregnant with twins, but because there is no official SIP her employer is not required to give her any kind of leave, or make any effort for her to be able to work from home. Because she is home “voluntarily “ she may not qualify for unemployment. Here, where there is an official SIP, landlords are not allowed to evict for non-payment until the SIP is lifted. There, the landlord sent a letter reminding all tenants that their rent is due no matter what the circumstances, even though they have never been late. Here, water & power can not be turned off during the SIP, there no such protection exists. Here, because of the SIP, people in need can apply for WIC or other necessary aid online; there she must apply in person even though her OB said she shouldn’t be leaving the house. Her appt is Thursday. Wouldn’t it be nice to rely on the common sense and compassion of others during this time to protect those who are most physically and financially vulnerable? Unfortunately, where business is concerned we value the right to make money and the freedom to do whatever we want more. I am tired of seeing this kind of selfishness couched as patriotism. A person who feels like official SIP is the right thing to do does not love and value freedom less than the next person. Amber in SJ

I had the surgery when I was 3 years old. My mom was very strict about the therapy. I wore the glasses and an eyepatch forever, even to school. My mom was so upset by looking at me with the skin colored eyepatch that every day she drew something on the eyepatch. One day she drew an eye. Seriously, an unblinking eye, because that is less upsetting than no eye, apparently. Anyway, I had the one surgery if my kids needed it then I would get it done, but I think the therapy is the actual key to success, because my BIL had the same surgery and his parents never did the therapy and he has struggles as an adult with one of his eyes wandering when he is tired. Amber in SJ