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Lady Florida.

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Everything posted by Lady Florida.

  1. I wonder if I'm the only person in the U.S. whose mother never once made a jello salad. Was it because she was a busy working single mother? She just made plain jello and put it in the fridge. The end. She never, ever put anything in it and only occasionally added whipped cream on top when serving it. Dh's mother made weird jello salads and we're only 2 years apart, so I don't think it's my age.
  2. When I've felt like talking to the salesperson more than usual I've said something like, "I know you have a spiel and you're supposed to say X but can we just discuss Y for a bit?". Someone who actually has sales experience can switch gears and talk to me about what they're selling, with more than just the sales pitch. Those who are inexperienced or took the sales job temporarily always get flummoxed. Unfortunately many of them are young people who were tricked into thinking they could make good money when in fact they're working on commission (another reason to learn basic logic).
  3. That would be a side effect of the medication, as was already pointed out. Many of us have said that it's important to try different doses and different medications, so we aren't saying they can't possibly have that effect on people. We're saying not what the meds are supposed to do, not what they normally do. It's an unacceptable side effect and that a different medication might not do that. People - in general, not specifically anyone here - sometimes have a bad experience with ADHD meds, don't have the doctor try something else and/or different doses, and just stop and say that ADHD meds did such and such to me/my kid.
  4. I don't get it either. Ds has always liked to draw and hated to write. In his early homeschool years I used to let him draw a recap of his lessons as a way of testing him, rather than making him write. He drew all the time, both on and off meds. Right now, as a 21yo he's drawing something to do with D&D characters for his group and as as far as I know his meds haven't worn off yet. I don't get the belief that meds curb creativity. Rather opposite as you pointed out about your writing. They let you use what creativity you have instead of being side tracked.
  5. I completely agree. I have a good friend with inattentive type who was diagnosed as an adult (actually watching me go through the dx process with my son helped her realize she probably had ADHD). Her symptoms of inattention and inability to focus are similar to his, but there are so many differences too because she doesn't have hyperactivity or impulse control issues. My son has combined type-moderate, so he has both inattentive and impulse control issues. Some medicines only target inattentive type, Strattera for example, works better for that type and not for those with hyperactive-compulsive or combined type. We did try it when it first came out and it was useless for him. My friend finds Vyvanse very helpful for her. OTOH, it made him tired and he also felt like it didn't work as well as some other meds he had tried. Concerta or Adderal are the two have been the most beneficial for him, and he currently takes Adderal. That medication has such a stigma and angers me when people make jokes about him taking it. They act like he enjoys it when the sad reality is he would much rather not need that or any other medication. As I said upthread, he tried not taking meds. He knows that's not an option for him. I wasn't aware of the choline studies, but knew about the dopamine theories. People usually think of dopamine as the feel-good hormone but it's also the neurotransmitter that regulates impulse control. It's what helps most of us say, wait a minute, maybe doing this isn't such a good idea, and it's what those with combined or hyperactive-impulsive type ADHD are lacking. Having that type of ADHD is like living life with hindsight, always being able to look back and realizing that they shouldn't have done what they did. Afterwards they can tell you exactly what was wrong with the action and why they shouldn't have done it. They can likely tell you what they should have done instead. It's before they do something that they have trouble with 'stop and think first'. That's why a lot of kids with that type of ADHD get labled as troublemakers because those who don't understand it say things like, "See. He knew it was wrong and he did it anyway". Medications don't increase the amount of dopamine the brain makes but help the brain to release more and/or use it more efficiently. There was some hope among the ADHD crowd back before DSM-V was released that there would be changes to how the types were diagnosed and treated but of course that didn't happen. The changes were subtle, mostly covering symptoms and criteria, but it's still ADHD with the three types lumped together. It did help clear up how to properly diagnose adults, which is a good thing but it's a shame they didn't go further. (They also changed the wording from Type to Presentation but I've been saying type for so long that it's hard to change.) There are levels of ADHD - mild, moderate, and severe. People with mild ADHD, regardless of type, often find they can control it without medication. This can lead people who are only familiar with mild ADHD to think meds are unnecessary. Those with moderate or severe ADHD usually find life without meds to be unbearable. The co-morbid conditions of anxiety or depression often go along with moderate or severe ADHD.
  6. My mom was a good cook but she's from a generation when commercially canned food was a new and convenient thing, especially since we were city dwellers. The only things I wouldn't eat today that she used to serve are Campbell's soups and some canned vegetables. In her later years she got away from that, but when she was a single working mother, that convenience was a big help to her. The main dishes she cooked were always good.
  7. Both of the above statements say so much in just a few words. I think people who either don't have ADHD or aren't close to someone who has it don't understand the full impact it has on a person's life. Some also think that meds change the person. They don't. They help the real person come out and help them to be their best selves. Meds are not a cure. They are simply a balance. They give people with ADHD equal footing to those who don't have it. Some meds work better on people who only have inattentive type with a focus issue, some work better for impulse control issues, and some work on those who have both types. That's why it's important to both have a proper diagnosis and to try different meds/different doses to find work works best for the individual. ADHD involves more than just misplaced attention. Two of the three types involve lack of impulse control. That's not a good thing on a hunting trip. I've often said it should be called ADID, with the I standing for impulse. The H makes people often think of the hyperactive kid who just needs some exercise or needs to be directed towards what they love. It's more about inability to focus (A), inability to control impulses (H or I), or both if the person has combined type.
  8. The only time I read a paper book anymore is if I really want to read it but don't want to own it, and I can't borrow a digital edition. Then I'll check out the paper copy from my local library. Otherwise it's all Kindle books all the time.
  9. Yes. I don't use Adobe for anything other than their free PDF reader and never heard of using ADE to read books. I check out Kindle editions of books and send them to my Paperwhite. It goes through your Amazon account once you click on the button for the Kindle edition, but then you just tell it which device to send it to. We have the app on our phones, plus dh and ds each have Paperwhites. Since I'm the biggest reader in the family I have my Kindle set as the default device. ETA: You could also physically add it to the device by plugging it in to your computer, but there's no need unless for some reason you don't have wifi on the Kindle.
  10. I'm sure that's part of it but there are many positions (I can't think of the right word) that aren't battlefield related where access to meds wouldn't be an issue. Ds became more mellow once he hit his teens in that his hyperactivity calmed down. His focus is still an issue and he has to work harder than his peers to control his impulses. When he was in 9th grade he insisted he didn't need meds. With the approval of his doctor he came off of them. He basically wasted nearly his whole freshman year of high school. One day I found the medicine bottle with a few left, that for whatever reason I hadn't thrown away. I asked him to humor me and try it. He did. The next day I asked him how it worked. He had a light bulb moment of realizing he really does need meds. He said he forgot he had taken it and just though he was having "a really good math day". Fortunately with homeschooling, we were able to make up for the wasted year. If he had been in school it would have been a disaster.
  11. Yes, many public libraries offer ebooks through Overdrive. Apparently your library system uses something different in Cloud Library. Overdrive seems to be the most common. If your library doesn't offer Overdrive (and if Cloud Library is a competitor I'm guessing they don't) there are other options. There are a number of public libraries around the U.S. that allow you to pay a yearly fee for an out of state e-card. The one I belong to is in Fairfax Co. VA, and I pay $27 a year. My library system has Overdrive but the number of ebooks is fairly small and the number of "copies" aka licenses, is also small. To me it's worth the fee to have access to more ebooks, plus with more licenses my wait time for the more popular books is lower. I found the link. This is 3 years old so I'm not sure how up to date the costs are but it's worth looking into (I know the VA one is still correct).
  12. Seriously. I would not want to take my kid, who has the kind ADHD that includes lack of impulse control, and put a gun in his hand without him having taken his medication. That would be the worst hunting trip ever lol. On a related note, really irks me that the U.S. military requires anyone with ADHD to have been off meds for a year AND to pass a test with no accommodations, to prove they can focus, before being allowed to join. Um, duh. Does the military not know how ADHD works? Apparently not. And they are missing out on some fantastic people who would be an asset IF they're allowed to continue treatment during their enlistment.
  13. Technically, scientifically, medically, ADHD is a mental illness. It's more often referred to as a disorder but the definitions are the same. It's a mental illness. Sometimes it can be treated without medicine, sometimes it can't. Some chronic mental illnesses can be treated without medication. Some can't. Some chronic physical illnesses can be treated without medication. Some can't. Regardless, self diagnosis or parental diagnosis is not the best practice. Diagnosis by a professional can rule out the numerous other conditions that can mimic the symptoms of ADHD. Then together the parent, doctor, and child if old enough, can discuss the best treatment. There are three types of ADHD and each type can be mild, moderate, or severe. Whether or not more children (and adults) are diagnosed and/or treated in some countries is irrelevant. This is an interesting article about how different cultures treat and respond to ADHD. To me it reads more like an opinion piece but is worth considering imo. Exercise? When my now grown child with ADHD was young, the more active he was, the more active it made him. Also, it had absolutely ZERO effect on his impulse control or his ability to focus, which are basically the definition of his type of ADHD, known as Combined Type. Exercise or other physical activity made him tired at the end of the day, sure, but it did nothing whatsoever to control his ADHD. Overdiagnosed? Perhaps. Perhaps underdiagnosed. More likely, neither. The following was not a study, but instead a review of the literature - 99 articles related to ADHD diagnoses. From the Results section - bolding mine: "In a large proportion of children with ADHD, symptoms persist into adulthood. However, although adults with ADHD often experience chaotic lifestyles, with impaired educational and vocational achievement and higher risks of substance abuse and imprisonment, many remain undiagnosed and/or untreated." Two articles on undiagnosed/untreated ADHD and how it impacts adults with the disorder - Myths and misunderstandings about ADHD - More on overdiagnosis, from this link, again the bolding is mine. Myth # 3: ADHD is Over-Diagnosed The rate of diagnosed ADHD in children has increased approximately 5% every year, according to the National Survey of Children’s Health, 2003—2011. This has led many to wonder if the condition is being over-diagnosed. But the report based on the 2014 National Survey of the Diagnosis and Treatment of ADHD and Tourette Syndrome found that children are being carefully diagnosed by healthcare practitioners. The vast majority (9 out of 10) of the 2,976 children diagnosed with ADHD had been diagnosed by practitioners using best practice guidelines (Visser et al. 2015). Possible explanations for increased diagnostic rates include improved awareness about ADHD among healthcare practitioners and parents, more screenings by pediatricians and other primary care givers, decreased stigma about ADHD, availability of better treatment options, and more cases arising from suspected environmental causes such prenatal exposure to toxins or high blood lead levels. Finally, the FDA just approved the first non-medication medical device for treating ADHD. Unfortunately, it's limited in who can use it, but hopefully it's a start. I am not saying every person who has ADHD needs to be treated with medication. However, I feel very strongly that if ADHD is suspected it should be properly diagnosed by a professional. Trying things like exercise, constant redirection, supplements, home dosing with stimulants such as Mountain Dew or caffeine pills, are not a substitute for a proper diagnosis. The first step is to find out if the child's problem is truly ADHD. From there, there are a number of options depending on the type and severity of the condition, and several of those options do not include medication. I'm also saying when those options don't work, it makes no sense to deprive the child of proper medication, if that's what's needed.
  14. One type of allergy relief doesn't work for me. I take Zyrtec in the morning and use Flonase spray at night (generic versions of both). Neither make me drowsy.
  15. I'm going to pm you with some links and info.
  16. That seems totally weird to me. I live in a place where people just assume you're Christian. For example, I can't begin to count how many times I've been wished a Happy Easter this past week since everyone just assumes you celebrate it. Yet I still can't imagine something like that happening here. I would find it awkward and inappropriate.
  17. Well, it is kind of delicate because there are things you can do on Calibre (which the OP has) that will allow you to read on a different format. OP, I'm not familiar with Cloud Library. I borrow quite a few books from the library through Overdrive, and there are a lot of Kindle books available to me. Go online and look into doing more with Calibre. You probably can't do what you want to without an add-on to Calibre, but if you're only going to use it for your own reading purposes it shouldn't be considered wrong. I totally agree about not wanting to read on a tablet. I much prefer my Paperwhite and only choose to read magazines or cookbooks on my tablet. ETA: I've never tried to read epub on a Kindle and I'm not sure it can be done. I have converted epub books to Kindle format (mobi or azw) for my own use, using Calibre.
  18. It's incredibly hard for abused children to turn on their abusers if the abusers were their parents. The human need for parental love is strong and it's not uncommon for children, even when they're older and know better, to try and rationalize why their parents might have done what they did. It's better (in their minds) to think their parents had an undiagnosed mental illness or that they were doing the best they knew how to at the time. The alternative of 'they didn't really love, want, or even like me' is too hard to process and accept. I hope those kids can heal enough to have healthy relationships of their own one day. It's not going to be easy for any of them,. Not the older ones and not the younger ones.
  19. This. Exactly. There is nothing wrong with using meds for mental illness, and ADHD is a mental illness. Adding on to the "what if it was a physical illness" question, would you do the same if it was a different mental illness such as bipolar or schizophrenia? Depression? Anxiety? ADHD, like other mental illnesses, can be treated with meds, and often it should be. It looks as though you've tried other methods and they haven't helped. It's time to see a doctor to discuss medication. Every adult I know who was diagnosed and put on meds as an adult has said they wish their parents would have had them dx'ed and treated when they were young. Yes, that's just my experience but that seems to be wider than my circle. People diagnosed as adults often spent their childhood trying to live up to something they just can't manage, and are relieved to know they have an actual illness that can be treated.
  20. I spent years trying to find a pillow that allowed me to sleep comfortably and not wake up with my neck hurting. I tried various types of fiberfill and memory foam pillows. I tried cheap ones and expensive ones. I made sure I bought pillows for side sleepers. I tried the kind with the neck cutout for side sleepers. I tried pillows that were recommended here on WTM (I might have even started a thread or two asking for pillow help). Each time I either hated it from the first night or it was fine for a week or two, but then started giving me neck aches. Finally one of the searches I did brought up this latex foam pillow. I don't know why I didn't think of it myself. When I was a kid my mother always got me what used to be called "foam rubber" pillows and they were perfect. I think at some point they fell out of favor. This one is basically the same kind of pillow I had growing up. I bought it in January and am still happy with it.
  21. Mine too. Even as an atheist I'm terribly upset over this but there's nothing religious in my sadness. I didn't even know that mass was still said there so I didn't think of it as an actual active church. To me it's all about the history.
  22. There was a worldwide outage of all their services for several hours. I used both Facebook and Messenger shortly before coming here so it seems they're back. Whether it's back for everyone or whether it's back consistently, who knows.
  23. Before we moved to Florida all the white people I knew or knew of were either Catholic or Jewish. I hadn't heard of Protestantism in general but I knew some Baptists. They were all Black, so my young, immature mind told me "Oh, okay. Baptist must be the Black religion.". And no, I didn't think to ask any adults, though I don't know why not. When we moved to Florida one of the first friends I made was white and Baptist. Only then did I start wondering and asking questions. I didn't know some Christians don't consider Catholics to be Christians until we started homeschooling, so that would have been the early 2000s. I was well into adulthood then. I know I wasn't explaining it well which is why I tagged Laura. It's more about an attitude towards Christmas than an attitude towards how Christmas is celebrated. Check her posts above, esp. the one with the clips from Love, Actually. When I first saw that movie I thought the writers were just being silly, but as Laura said, it's somewhat over the top but not completely.
  24. I went bowling with my boyfriend when REO Speedwagon was popular. There was a guy in the group next to us named Mario and all night long his (very loud) friends were calling him Mario Speedwagon. We laughed at first but were so tired of hearing it by the time the night was over.
  25. Oh I remembered another one. The Long and Winding Road ( @Dotwithaperiod's Uncle Albert post made me think of it). It came out after we moved to FL but at that point we were still making frequent visits to family in NJ. I had cousins who lived at the top of a hill and at the end of a long, winding road. We used to sing the first line because the long and winding road really did lead to their door. 🙂 I was listening to the Beatles station on Sirius not long ago and heard the song. It transported me back to those days. There are really so many. It's funny what music does to us in relation to memories. Kodachrome by Paul Simon was actually playing on the radio as I was on my way to my high school graduation. "When I think back on all the crap Iearned in high school" 😂😄 I still think of that when I hear the song. In case you're wondering why I still hear all these old songs, it's not me listening to oldies stations. Ds likes 70s and 80s music so we listen to it a lot when he's around, and we've been listening to it since he was in his early teens (he's 21).
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