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StartingOver

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  1. If you are looking for someone, adopted, or want a tree then Ancestry is your best bet. 23andme is more for health, you can connect to family but it isn't much more than a list. 23 and me did find a 1/2 we never knew about. ;-) I highly suggest both, if you can afford it.

    • Like 1
  2. I've had first, second, and third cousins show up via Ancestry in the last couple of years. A good bit of adoption in our family! The second cousin found his birth parents within a week of getting his test results and joining the DNA detective group. He met them both right away. Sadly, his birth mother died of natural causes within a couple weeks after the meeting...but so neat that his wish to meet her was fulfilled.

    So awesome that he got to meet her. I am afraid with my dad's age, that he might not get to meet his daughter. That would be sad.

  3. Isnt it the most wonderful feeling?  My own mother, who is 72 is going through the same thing.  She just discovered that the man who raised her is not her bio dad.  And within a few months had tracked down her her bio dad most likely was.  Then she found a half sister (one of more than a dozen half sibs) who has already submitted her own sample to verify they are half sisters.

     

    That half sister of my mom is in her mid 80s and willing to do the test to confirm.  

    Yes, just wonderful! That is awesome! Dad is 76 but in really good health. He is ready to fly out to meet her as soon as she says the word. ;-)

  4. A person's privacy ends when another human is created.  Of course they are free to tell the child they gave up they want nothing to do with them.....

    This !! My children have a right to know where they come from, even if their dad doesn't care. They have a right to their history, medical info, and heritage.

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  5. I’m so torn anout this. On one hand, adopted children have a right to know their history. But, otoh, parents who have chosen adoption have some right to privacy, don’t they? And I’ve watched enough sci-fi to be concerned that private info put in a public place might end badly. Idk, I left my tinfoil hat at home today so i’m extra jittery, I guess.

    You can keep your results private, but they can still connect through cousins, siblings, and other family. Biological parents don't have to accept contact. 

     

    I believe every child has a right to their medical information by any means. If it goes beyond that it is up to all parties involved. My husband has no interest at all. But he did take the test for the kids benefit,

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  6. That's so cool! Dh and I were given Ancestry DNA tests last year, but he wants nothing to do with it. He's adopted and never had any desire to go looking for his birth mother or any other relatives. He's ok if ds wants to do a test but ds isn't interested at his age, so I'm going to sell the test. Mine came up as I expected and did help with tracing my family back through other matches. I also ran the raw data through Promethease, which was very interesting and definitely worth the small fee. It's not for the medically anxious person though!!

    I would test him or your son just to run through Promethease for medical info. You don' t have to share info and can totally opt out now so no one will ever see the results but you. And opt back in later if they wish. I found out that hubby's paternal family all, parents, siblings, siblings grandchildren ( a large spread in ages ) even all died before 50 of heart issues. That was important info for our children to know.

  7. :hurray:  So cool. There is family lore that my dad had a kid when he was much younger. I'd love to know for sure.

    My dad was 22 and fresh out of the Navy. He never knew. It is possible to find the child if they have tested. More and more Adoptees are testing. Or even those who just don't know a parent.

  8. I'm so happy this all turned out well for you!

     

    This year for Christmas I got 23 and Me for my mom who was adopted and AncestryDNA for me since I have a subscription. I'm really nervous about it. I'll check out that FB group. 

     

    This video helped a lot too, I am a visual person. 
  9. Thats Amazing. And I'm hoping for similar when my test results come in - I have two siblings I've never been able to find thanks to adoption. DNA is my only hope. 

    If you aren't on DNA Detectives on Facebook, CeCe Moore's group, you might want to join. They provided so much help in finding my husband's family. He was also adopted. Ancestry proved to be the best choice to test with to find them. Then I transferred to everywhere else. 23andMe was the best for me to test on because I found her.

    • Like 1
  10. OK, I'm going of topic, but I had to share this in case anyone is interested in supporting this cause. There is a bill before Congress called the PAWS Act. It's intended to provide more funding so that more vets who suffer from ptsd can receive support dogs. 20 veterans a day commit suicide. This bill won't solve everything, but it does something!

     

    https://www.k9sforwarriors.org/blog/paws-act-time-act-now

     

    www.congress.gov/bill/115th-congress/house-bill/2327/text

     

    Will share this link !! Thank you.

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  11. I am hosting this year.

     

    Cajun injected roasted Turkey

    Smoked ham

    Green bean casserole

    Sweet potatoes

    Mashed potatoes

    Corn

    Sage stuffing

    Giblet gravy

    Rolls

    Deviled eggs

    Cranberry sauce

    Ambrosia

    Cheese cake

    Brownie cheese cake

    Pumpkin pie

    Peanut butter fudge

    Fudge

    Trisha Yearwood's Crack.

  12. My, Navy, son did a tour in 2007 in Afghanistan as a medic. When he came home he so far removed from the boy who joined. Once he got his dog he was so much better. He is an emotional support dog, and he did take him everywhere with him for a while. He stopped looking over his shoulder at any little noise, stopped ducking at loud noises, his anger slowly came under control... I am so grateful for his dog. He does not take him everywhere anymore but I am thankful for the law, even if misused, that allowed him to have his companion with him at all times for those first couple of years. He is off all medications and coping much better now. 

     

    Being older and knowing many Vietnam Vets, including many family members, who really struggled for years I am extremely happy that many have used this loophole to heal even a little bit in our time. We are losing so many, daily, that I feel people should just go about their business and leave them be. My son has attended many funerals since he has returned state side. It is beyond sad.

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  13. I have been investigated 3 times. I had a two year old and when we went for shots the pediatrician reported on me because he thought my 2 year old had knuckle marks on his face. He didn't ask me, he just called. When CPS got to the house I told them that it most definitely was not. So we went to his room to look for what could have caused it. I pulled out his toddler bed and a toy fell down. The feet of the toy fit the marks perfectly. Case closed.

     

    The second time another neighbor called because I locked the same child in his room at night. When CPS came I explained and told her to walk with me, before we crossed the room I asked the child if he wanted to go to the park. As we turned our backs he grabbed the dining room chair and dragged it to the door. He climbed up and unlocked the dead bolt and the security chain. I walked with her to the door he opened and pointed to the road adjacent to our apartments, a major highway, and asked her if she wanted him playing out there before I got up in the mornings? ( I had a simple hook on his bedroom door.) Case closed.

     

    The third time I went on vacation while my kids stayed in Montana for 3 days, with family in town. They were 14, 13, and 11. My neighbor stayed with them and someone else reported I left them alone. When CPS came to the door my daughter told them the sitter was next door at her house for a few. Montana law says 12 to stay home alone and after they talked to the adult in charge the case was closed.

     

    I have had some nosy neighbors that didn't have the decency to ask, which is annoying. But I was never scared.

  14. Minimum is so subjective. I have seen many more that seem to me to be doing less than the minimum, in the last 5 years of so, in my area, in my opinion. It is hard to judge as we are very rigorous. I would say 1-2 percent are likely guilty of educational neglect. I personally know of 5 families who have been ordered to send children to public school, all of those children were years behind their peers. In all of those cases I don't believe the parents were teaching at all.

     

    Edited to add: I see a lot of, "My child doesn't want to do XYZ", with a lot of replies like, "Oh, my child doesn't either so we are waiting till they want to." There seems to be a new way of thinking around my area that what they want to do just isn't necessary.

    • Like 1
  15. Absolutely. I have lived a life with awkward truths and devastating lies. The lies have always been the most painful.

     

    Even this thing with my long dead grandmother. I question everything now. We really never knew her

     

    So many lies, so many secrets. Just be honest.  I am on a search for an unnamed father, not my own but someone very close. I just found a great grandmother I had been searching for, for over 20 years, it was all through DNA. 

     

    Anyone who doesn't understand why these tests would be done could visit DNA Detectives on Facebook, run by CeCe from the Long Lost Family show. You will see all sides of the issue and what DNA is bringing to it. 

     

    I am thankful for my DNA health results too. It proves my suspicion about many preventative medical issues. 

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  16. 23andMe was half price through Amazon on Prime day; if you are wanting to test I'd check back around black Friday weekend.

     

    Thank you, I was so focused on Ancestry last year, I must have missed it. I have been doing Genealogy for 23 years, I want all the info I can get from every company. ;-)

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  17. I did Ancestry, the transferred to FTDNA for $18, and to Gedmatch.com and Myheritage.com for free. I want to still test at 23 & me. I also ran my Ancestry DNA through  https://promethease.com/  for medical info.

     

    I am very happy that we tested with Ancestry first. I tested by father and husband for Y-DNA at FTDNA and plan to test myself for MrDNA soon. 

     

    All sites have sales through the year, except I have never seen one at 23 & me. So I would sign up, join mailing lists, watch on facebook, or join a DNA genealogy group. 

    • Like 2
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