My distractable son did better studying in his room. He's at school now, but if he was still at home I would probably work on getting a desk set up in there and removing as many temptations as possible.

PSE would be the most user friendly of them all. Photoshop really isn't necessary if you're not a professional. Lightroom is helpful if you are planning on shooting RAW (uncompressed files), which offer a better quality image but they eat up hard drive space FAST. It is also nice for organizing and batch editing. Actually, there are free Photoshop actions for photo editing all over the place, as well as paid ones. Photoshop is virtually limitless for editing photos--it is (I think) the industry standard for professionals. So if you're not planning on going pro any time soon, I would start with PSE, get used to it, then get the 30-day trial of Lightroom and see if you like/need it.

I voted #1, but "having the true & correct view of salvation and God and believing it with all your heart" will result in regeneration (or the other way around, actually), which results in a change in behavior. Also, Paul and James weren't in conflict. At least, Peter didn't seem to think so.

I think if she's doing well academically and socially I wouldn't worry about it too much. Even though it sounds like the teacher is being nitpicky, your DD doesn't seem to be picking up on the negativity. I would do whatever you would normally do to motivate her to remember her books, and try to observe some of her friendships to see if there's any truth to what the teacher is saying. We just started DS in school last month, and his first teacher seemed very negative and harsh to me. I saved my negative comments about her for when DS wasn't around and encouraged him to do his best and work on the things she wanted him to work on. He ended up needing to switch grades so he doesn't have her anymore. But in our situation I have felt like I am setting him up for failure if I don't back his teacher up and give a unified front...like in parenting.

Yes, we're definitely light on LA. I think we'll probably redo WWE1, since I already have it and I don't think they'll remember it well enough to find it repetitive. Maybe add in another silent reading time, too....and maybe load up on art supplies and other things that they will enjoy. I do want them to be able to find interesting, worthwhile things to do during unstructured time and not need every moment planned for them. Thanks, everyone, for helping me think through this!

Up until Nov, DS took about 90% of my energy during our school time. Now that he's in PS, I'm finding that I'm capable of doing more, and I'm considering how I might make the younger girls' educations a little more rigorous. This is what we're doing so far (they are in 1st and 2nd grades): Read-Aloud Bible Study Guide for All Ages (and/or Scripture memory) SOTW, Science, or Art (1x/week each except SOTW, which is often 2x/week) Math (2nd grader does TT3, 1st grader does MUS Alpha) Spelling Workout 30 min. of reading (2nd grader usually does more on her own) To me, the most glaring hole is writing--we were doing WWE2, but dropped it when DS started school. Neither of them was ready for it. So we could go back and redo WWE1, or do something different. Neither of them really need penmanship practice. We are also in an enrichment co-op one day a week--the classes are fairly meaty, but not anything I would factor into our normal curriculum. Why do I feel like we need to add anything? Mostly because the girls have a lot of free time now, and so do I. They are able to do more than they currently are. My ideas about what to add are these: more time doing math, a supplemental math curric, more time reading independently, American history, definitely a writing curric, maybe a reading curric. Or I could just leave the time open (and the TV off) and let them develop their interests. What would you do? Thanks in advance!

When you can make out distinct shapes under a t-shirt, it's time for a bra, imo. Especially when the t-shirts these days are so thin. It's just part of covering up, like wearing a swimsuit or pants that don't slide down too far when you bend over. The less you make a big deal out of it, the less it will seem like a big deal to her. DD can still get by with one of the thin ones that looks like a light sports bra, before that she would wear a tank top, but the bra is less bulky.

Mine were 5, 9, 6, and 8 days late, respectively.

Ok, now that I've read a little more...the football thing doesn't seem that weird to me, esp if he bought the tickets in advance. There is no way I'd give up time with no kids to watch someone else's kids. I wouldn't mind going to their house for the occasional party. If it was becoming too frequent, I'd probably ask them to make their plans earlier in the evening so the kids could come to my house and then go home at bedtime. Also, I think you should make yourself ask him to reciprocate, whether you "need" him to or not. It's important for relationships to be mutual whenever possible.

I didn't read the whole thread, but I would be over the moon at the opportunity to babysit my nephew at his house. I would limit it if I felt like I was being taken advantage of. If I had the option, I would always ask family before a paid sitter--not because of the money, but just to provide an opportunity for family bonding. I wouldn't do it every Saturday night, but I would do it if I could without hesitating, and my sister would be the first person I asked if she lived in town. If the kids were out of the needing-a-ton-of-gear phase, I probably would ask them to come to my house and have a sleepover. It is hard to babysit at someone else's house. I'd do it for my sister if I could, though.

Puzzles?

Totally!! Of course, it would depend on the group leadership and the kids in the group, and we would have a talk about safety, staying in groups, making good choices, etc. What an amazing opportunity for her! I went to the USSR with my high school marching band (May of '91, just before the Soviet Union fell). It was an unforgettable experience that I will always value. My mom came on the trip as a chaperone, but most parents didn't. Something to keep in mind, too, is that the chances of something bad happening to her (kidnapping, plane crash, etc.) are almost statistically impossible, whether she's in Europe or the US. The risk of something happening is so small, I don't think I would even factor it in. By the time they're leaving, they should be able to give you very specific behavior guidelines, a trip itinerary, details on how to communicate while they're gone, some cultural training, etc. A good group will put a lot of effort into preparing the team. I would definitely make sure the director (or a lead chaperone) has done a trip like this before, too.

Why don't you give the kids three options that Grandma can make, and tell them they *have* to pick one of these? You could maybe even pick the fabric (or let the kids pick it) and buy it yourself if that is an option for you. "Hey MIL, I happen to know that DS would really like a drawstring bag. Also, I found this fabric the other day that I'm sure he would like since he's so into tractors right now, and was wondering if you would like it?" She'll probably see through it, but she might appreciate the help. Otherwise, it might be a great opportunity to teach your kids how to graciously accept gifts they don't like. We're working on this one ourselves.

It sounds to me like you have let a lot of bad attitudes go unchecked and they are coming back to bite you now. With the 12-year-old, I would definitely be giving consequences for that kind of backtalk--whatever his/her currency is (isolation, no screen time, etc). The 16-year-old is trickier...she does sound selfish to me, but she's at an age where you can't make her do what you want. I would probably go the route of a behavior contract or something, and make it really clear what you expect from her, what kind of privileges are available when she meets your expectations and what kind of consequences there are when she doesn't. I know what it's like to feel put upon as the oldest child. I think it's important to for her to know what is expected, but also to know when she's done enough. Also, to have a fair reward system (allowance) that values hard work. Someone recommended the Boundaries series--I think these are excellent books that teach an important principle. Being a Christian and a servant doesn't mean allowing people to trample upon us. As parents I think we do our kids a disservice to allow them to continue in that mindset. The Bible tells us to "bring our children up in the training and admonition of the Lord". This covers our words and our actions. You should definitely model servanthood, but it's a rare mom who doesn't lay her life down for her kids. And sometimes we serve our kids best by teaching them right attitudes and actions. As far as the foster child issue...it does seem to me that dealing with these attitudes needs to become a higher priority.

DS is in school, the girls are homeschooled. DS has struggled with school all along. I always told myself that he needed to be homeschooled more than the girls because of his struggles, that he needed the individualized attention and expectations tailored to his abilities. It has turned out to be the opposite--he needs the structure and positive peer pressure he gets at school. We started him about a month ago in 4th grade (according to his age), it turned out that his low test scores and emotional maturity made 4th grade basically impossible for him, so we transferred him to 3rd grade, where he is doing much better. Granted, it's only been a week, but we're starting to see him understanding the material taught in class and responding well. It has been hard trying to accommodate a schooling lifestyle and a homeschooling lifestyle at the same time. It used to be that we would all do school in the morning (oldest DD would continue after the rest of us were done), I'd have some down time, then we'd do our evening activities. Now I have to do homework in the afternoon, and we've had to get more strict about bedtime. We have one evening where all 3 girls are in activities, and it takes 4 hours to do all the dropping off/picking up. That's hard for him after being in school all day (and still having homework when we get home). Also, our school lets out early on our co-op day, so that's been a challenge. One of the best pieces of advice given to me when we were deciding what to do was that I'm not locked into anything. If we try something and it doesn't work, we can do something else. I know that can be more difficult than it sounds when you factor in kids' desires and attitude....but I think if your nanny is ok with it, I would let your son give online learning a try. Why keep a kid somewhere if they're not thriving and you have the ability to move them? We have to work to maintain family unity, but the girls and I go to his assemblies and talk to him about his school and friends, and we show/tell him what we're doing. Again, it's still early in the game, but it seems to be working.

Exactly.

I excelled somewhat at math and loved science, but got off the STEM track because Calc scared me. People talked about it with such foreboding. Also, I loved my marching band experience, but as a senior I did have to choose between Calc and band...I chose band. I think people are afraid of (or disinterested in) hard work. Also, schools tend to squash those who are different or have compelling interests in anything--it seems like you would need to have a passion for math or the hard sciences to be willing to put in the effort when your peers are skating through a less rigorous program. I think the pendulum is swinging a *little* more toward geeky heroes, sciency shows like Mythbusters, LOST, Doctor Who, etc....maybe that's just in my house?? I don't know enough to comment on #2, but I don't know why ability to memorize would be a determining factor. On one hand I see why it is important to encourage women in STEM fields, on the other hand I think it is wise to encourage women to pursue careers that will not require them to be locked into a M-F, 8-5 schedule. Flexibility and the ability to work from home would be important (I think) to any woman who has an interest in having kids...not that men shouldn't also be flexible, but there is a difference. Also, it seems like things change so rapidly in STEM fields that taking time off to start a family could hinder a career more than in other fields...or even going through seasons where one can't put in extra time in the evenings and on weekends. And yes, I agree with the OP that it would seem that a BA won't get someone very far in pursuing a STEM career...maybe to an entry level position? Am I wrong?

That is offensive (MP's comment). My son will be 10 in 3 months, has been homeschooled all along (until 2 weeks ago), and would definitely not be able to pass the GED, no matter how wide awake he was.

The only thing I have to say that hasn't been said is that most schools can accommodate a kid who is working 1 year ahead. It is not all that uncommon, and actually might cause your son to reevaluate how he sees himself to be with other kids who are bright. My understanding is that high school challenge programs add depth to a standard workload, rather than breadth, which may provide more of a challenge to him than you think. Until recently, I never would have encouraged someone to consider school. But it ended up being the right answer for my son, who is younger but also struggles with motivation. The structure of a classroom has been helpful to him, as has the "positive peer pressure" of seeing other kids being successful and wanting to do what they do.

Depending on how formal you're going, you could just go barefoot...a lot of people do that. I think you'll be really happy going with grey, black, and white--you'll have a lot more options with your background that way.

I would try to find solid purple headbands, maybe with a flower, in a purple as close to your cardigan color as possible. White tops with jeans for the boys and your DH would be perfect. Adding in colors and patterns will take away from the subject--you want the attention to be on your beautiful family, not your clothes. Black, grey, white, and purple is a simple color palate, which is what you want. You might even consider dropping the purple and stick with black, grey, and white, or else go all black, grey, and purple (or white, grey, and purple). This would give you more options with your backdrops (if you want your main portrait to be on a white backdrop, you won't want to wear white clothing, etc.). If you look at the pictures professional photographers and photography studios use on their websites and promotional materials, The family is usually wearing the same color.

How clean is clean? You might enjoy Parenthood. It's a new series, so only the 1st 2 seasons are on Netflix. It does have some steamy/romantic scenes and a couple marijuana scenes, definitely nothing worse than LOST though.

This school sounds like it would be a great opportunity for him. If he was that excited about it, and then suddenly changed his mind once he found out it was a viable option, I wouldn't let him off the hook that fast. Especially if his ability is greater than that of his grade level. You could at least take him to meet the principal and take a tour of the school. Just because he's backpedaling now doesn't mean that you have to. It sounds like this school will give him a head start on a successful military career...or let him know if the military isn't a good fit before he's committed for 4 years. Somewhat different situation, but we just put my 4th grader in school. He was having problems paying attention and being motivated, and the outlet for his frustration was bullying his sister. He is thriving in school! He works harder on his homework with a better attitude than he ever did for me...and that is after being in school all day. He is engaged. I think you need to have a sit-down with him, tell him kindly your concerns, and have him talk to you about how he intends to address them. If he can't answer you, I would probably require school through the end of the year. I really don't see how anyone can homeschool a 15 year old that isn't taking responsibility for his/her education. If school doesn't work out, I would consider doing a "modified unschooling" approach. Only require what is necessary for graduation and/or community college admission, but also cut off his screen time and let him choose how to fill his time. Of course, I don't have teens so I don't know how much of this is based in reality. :P I just know that for my kids, motivation has been key and trying to do anything without it is like trying to push a parked vehicle.

For me, homeschooling has always been my first choice. However, we finally made the decision to put our son in school; he just finished his first week. He has struggled for a long time, but I always thought school would make his issues worse (quick, violent temper, easily frustrated, impulsive, sneaky, etc). Lately, though, he has been bullying his sister past what I would consider normal sibling rivalry, and it finally got to the point that I didn't feel like keeping him home would be safe for her. It turns out, the structure and positive peer pressure he has in school have been really helpful for him. He thrives on predictability and order, and I haven't been able to provide that to the degree that he needs it. Part of me wishes I'd put him in earlier...part of me hopes I'll be able to bring him home at the end of the year...I am loving how much less stressful my life is now that he's in school, though. He probably took about 75-80% of my attention (on a good day) and wanted constant attention and help. I actually think he might have ADD, but I want to see if being at school is enough to get him on track. I should add that we are in one of the top school districts in Western WA...the few that are as good as ours are in the wealthiest neighborhoods in the Seattle/Bellevue area. If his school wasn't so good, we would possibly be looking at a very different outcome. Anyway, all that to say I don't think there's an easy answer. I believe strongly in homeschooling. I also believe in doing what's best for my kids...and sometimes those aren't the same thing. I don't intend to put my other kids in school (except for band and maybe sports)....I don't have any reason to. So far, the hardest part has been that our school's schedule and our co-op's schedule aren't always the same, and we haven't been there long enough yet to make friends who can watch him when the girls and I have co-op and he doesn't have school. So there's that.

None of the above. I do think it's morally wrong and disgusting, I don't believe my tax dollars should be used to pay for it. I *do* care about the first amendment, I just don't think that stuff should be protected as free speech.