I did. I said that I welcomed their input. I'm not really wanting pages of feedback (I know they are busy). I guess I just would imagine that anyone who specifically chooses to show me something they wrote or painted or sculpted is looking for some kind of feedback (or at least acknowledgment that I saw it).

I wrote something very personal (an essay) and worked pretty hard on it. After a couple of drafts, I felt brave enough to send it to two friends whose opinions I trust. I have heard nothing. I sent it two nights ago. I'm struggling. I know people are busy but I feel super vulnerable right now. Would it be so hard to write a quick "got it, looking forward to reading it"? When do I follow up and ask if they received it? Now I'm regretting sharing my work. Ugh. Help talk me down. :crying:

My husband had this happen and it took about a week til he could sit or walk normally. He got an Rx for muscle relaxers and than helped. So sorry!!

I hated it to but because of the constant battles over length. When my dd was going to prom, everything was SO SHORT.

This makes me sad. :( I'm sorry.

Do you really think this is the case? Like, an emotional adult "cries wolf"(by crying when a family member hurts their feelings or something) and so when they get cancer, no one comforts them??? I have no category for this. I don't consider anything "too little to cry about" (even though I don't cry over smaller hurts, I would never judge someone who does) and I cannot imagine disqualifying someone for care/compassion because they cry over smaller things. I also can't imagine anyone (including someone like my dh) ignoring the pain of someone with cancer or a dead parent. He might feel awkward but he certainly wouldn't ignore them. Can you explain what you mean?

I totally agree with the above. If I just went out and bought myself jewelry, whenever I looked at it, it would compound the hurt... almost like a little shiny memorial to my dh's failure to love me well. Yuck. I think you need to bring it out in the open and let dh understand that he hurt you, and have a do-over. Let him make it right.

This is sort of a spin off of the missed anniversary gift thread. Someone said there that their dh doesn't respond well to tears or sadness due to his upbringing and it made me wonder... how common is this? My dh is the same way and I can't figure it out. If I am crying (even if it's not because he hurt me, just some other hurtful thing that happened), he seems panicked. To me, it's so instinctive to reach out and hug someone who is crying or at least say things like "Oh Honey, I'm so sorry. I understand. It's not fair that this happened (or whatever empathetic thing is appropriate)." But dh just seems frozen. He does feel sympathy for people who are hurting but he processes things rationally, like "how can this be fixed?" rather than empathetically (emotionally). It used to really hurt me that he doesn't have an instinct to comfort (doesn't everyone comfort those they love?!?), but I guess I've just gotten used to it. He would hug a kid who got hurt or whatever but then quickly move on to distraction techniques or trying to make the kid laugh. And if a kid's feeling are hurt, it's more about helping the kid figure out how to process the situation correctly (than letting the kid feel the feelings). Is this a stereotypically male thing? A product of upbringing? A function of personality? He was raised by an unemotional (except anger) military dad and a mom who rarely lost it/cried. So I have wondered if it's partly that he never really saw emotion (and empathy) expressed when he was a kid.

"Prude" is what I was called in 7th grade, assumedly because I didn't have any experience with boys and was not actively seeking it. This makes me laugh now. I was still 4 years from puberty at that point and had zero male friends, let alone a boyfriend! Somehow I think prudishness should correlate with opportunity.

I think it's standard marketing and I'm sure it's more related to crime rates (esp. sexual assault) than shootings. I rarely worry about shootings (they are rare) but I worry a lot about sexual assault.

My daughter just had hand, foot and mouth and for her, it was just like a mild cold. But the spots were exactly like the ones you describe. That's my vote.

I have an 8-year-old Eeyore. When he was 5, his brother lost something (small) of his and he sighed deeply and said, "I guess I'll just have to learn to live without it."

I have a Yukon XL and mechanics always call it a "truck." Something about the chassis. It has rust issues and we have had to replace the brake lines. It's a gas guzzler. I wouldn't get one again. But I also wouldn't get an Escalade because I would feel weird driving a Cadillac!

There are numerous studies that show that teenagers start distancing themselves from parents and attaching more to peers. This is widely considered a normal/healthy part of establishing an independent identity. What I am trying to figure out is, how do you think about the norm today vs. what is actually psychologically necessary/healthy? How do you know if we (as a culture) have just given up and actually should press for stronger family bonds even during teen years? How would things be without kids in school all day and/or constantly connected on phones and social media? What is worth fighting for and what should we resign ourselves to as parents of teens? My questions come out of our own family dynamic... we have 3 teens and more coming up. Dh tends to think that the idea of teens pulling away and attaching to friends is modern and that we shouldn't just accept it as what is. (Side note: He grew up in a family that moved a lot and so, as the constant "new kid," his identity was strongly rooted in his nuclear family.) I tend to think that this is a normal part of adolescence and that it's important that we not take it personally. Our kids know we are here for them and will come back around as young adults. (Side note: I grew up with an absent father and an emotionally unavailable mother and strongly attached to a "best friend" very early on. I never moved and so my friends were stable.) Our dd18 pulled away a lot during her senior year of high school. Again, this was hard for me but I don't think of it as negative (although in retrospect we should have stuck to our rule about no phones in her bedroom overnight -- we got lax around age 17 and I think that added to the distance). But now she talks to me a LOT and I believe we will always be close. On the other hand, dh is really grieved by the place her friends occupied (and still occupy) in her priorities. And I get it... it is hurtful when she comes home and it feels like the highlight is time with friends. But this is so common that I've sort of accepted it (and I identify with it personally, because thats how I was) whereas dh is kind of like "NEVER AGAIN" -- meaning that he wants to do all in his power to keep family as our other kids' primary attachment. So. What do you think and why? I guess I am not so interested in what is "out there" (because that's descriptive, but how things are isn't necessarily a rule of life, you know?) but what can/should be. Is it foolish to aim to be your kids' primary attachment until they are married? To fight against the propensity for teens to emotionally adhere to peers over parents? Or is this a worthy goal?

OP here and just to clarify, I use the word "cute" to mean "nice." This is a very common usage where I live -- put together, attractive, etc. I do not mean that I aspire to look like a child (or whatever your interpretation may be).

Jump on the trampoline, even when it's freezing out Make movies Origami Board games Teaching self to play guitar (YouTube, big brother) Draw/paint Learn magic tricks (YouTube) Play soccer in the field with friends Ride bike Read (Harry Potter right now) HOWEVER... this is my most creative/self-entertained child. I have other kids who would just mope around bored and ask for screen time. I think a lot depends on the kid.

I just realized that while it's cold, I have zero interest in looking cute. I delete emails from stores that I love without even looking. I throw out catalogs that I might page through in other seasons. I make do with whatever I have and am not even tempted to buy clothes. I am ONLY interested in staying warm!!! Anyone else? Not much fun, but good for the budget. ;) ETA: I still wear it. Just in case you were concerned.

For me, it was after #5 was born. I just felt satisfied, complete. I love seeing babies at church, I think they are a beautiful blessing, but I *never* yearn for another of my own now.

It was frozen and I defrosted it in my fridge for a day and a half.

:lol: Good qualification! :lol:

It's still cold.

I put a turkey breast in the crockpot 3 hours ago and turned it on low... you guessed it, it wasn't plugged in. ARGH! Can I still cook it and serve it? Please say yes...

We didn't do Santa with first 3 kids for religious reasons. Then we chilled out some and started doing Santa for fun with the younger two. The older of those two kind of figured out on his own that Santa is pretend (like I did as a kid)... no big fanfare, just kind of a "Mom, I know it's you!" and an agreement that it's fun to pretend. And then we have ds8, who still believes. Deeply, with his whole heart. And now I am thinking "crap, what have we done?" I feel like telling him is going to shatter his trust in us. He asks questions like "do you think there is one Santa who always was, or has it been different Santas over the years?" and I just vaguely say "what do you think?" He is a very serious, rule-following kid, an old soul who trusts us completely. We're starting to feel like it's almost time to tell him the truth (maybe like it's going to be worse the longer we let it go)... How in the world are we going to do this? If you had a kid you had to tell (rather than the casual "figured it out along the way" thing), please share how you did it and how it went. And if your kid still trusts you. :crying:

The man who helped me at Home Depot the other day had a very realistic-looking hornet tattooed at the outer corner of his eye (not on his eye, on his face). It was so distracting while I was talking to him... not just because it was a face tattoo but because, you know... hornet crawling towards someone's eye. :scared:

Never. That's terribly rude and selfish and would not be tolerated.