Ha! We are reading the Secret Garden and I'm trying to read Martha and Dickon in broad Yorkshire. :001_smile:

Ask Father. I'm sure he will have some way of helping, knowing how eager you are for church. :grouphug:

My sweet, kind, MIL would love a hug. Sometimes my kids are being stubborn and won't do it. It's not because they are feeling that something is wrong with MIL. They are just feeling put on the spot and contrary. MIL has been vetted! She is trusted by our family. DC should be able to hug her, no problem. I confess I do get annoyed when they won't. I don't think I'm trampling on their individual liberties by encouraging them to do so. That is totally different from making them hug someone that I or they don't feel right about. Some distant relative that see seldom, or who is a little 'off.' In that case I would pay attention if I saw they were reluctant. I have to say I agree with Spycar on this one, though I do think that PTG is a good book and he doesn't.

He wants you there; he's scared; you should go. I don't know how long the surgery is, but I don't think you are really expected to make conversation with GF for all that time, sitting on plastic chairs in some waiting room. Just be there for him before he goes in, and after he comes out. Bring your newspaper, your knitting, or even go to the coffee shop. You can always say, 'when I am nervous I need to be doing something. I can't just sit here! I'm sure he will be fine, and I will be back at the time that he's supposed to come out. Text me if there's any concern. So nice to meet you, hope we get a chance to know each other better at a less stressful time!'

:001_smile: So glad he is OK for now.

Re: Mary/marry/merry-- in certain parts of the country they ARE all pronounced the same, that is why some of you don't hear any difference. I think if you heard 'one of us' saying them differently, you would notice. For example, I had a friend named Cheryl. I pronounced it "Sheh-rill" but she said this was not right, she said it sounded like I was saying "Shirr-ill" and I had to keep trying til I called her "Shay-rill" which sounded very unnatural to me, but that's how it was right, to her. :001_smile:

Go and get your BP checked formally at the Dr/midwife's.

My kids have not picked up my accent. I'm from the East coast and we live on the West coast. I don't know where they've gotten it from, but my kids pronounce these three words alike: Mary marry merry They say 'may-ree' for all of them. To me, these are 3 different vowel sounds. I'm trying to train them out of this, but I don't think it's going to work. :001_smile: I can only imagine how I would feel if we had more significant differences, because I really don't like it! ETA I don't have the Boston accent, though I am from there, but I like to say "wicked good" or "bubbla" (water fountain) or "bookin' down the highway" just for fun.

:grouphug:

Thanks! I have this on my shelf right now-- unused as yet!

How about this? DS8 (Lying on the floor): "I can't get up and go get dressed! I'm under the Petrificus Totalus curse!" Me (waving my invisible wand): "Relashio! Now you're not! Now get up!" (Not sure if that's the right counter-spell, but it worked!) :001_smile:

:001_smile: Congratulations!

You've gotten some great advice! so I will just chime in with an additional thought-- maybe the anxiety is worse because of noticing things, but not being able to do anything about them. At that age it is so hard. If there was some way that she could be involved helping people who are suffering or who have some difficult problem to cope with. Or even animals. I suppose she is too young to do much with suicide prevention? but she could be involved in community activities which are supposed to 'keep kids off the street' and/or strengthen the bonds of community so that people who are in despair have people around them who they can talk to before it gets bad. Or helping anyone. Like volunteering someplace, even tutoring kids who are having trouble reading, or at a soup kitchen, or Habitat, whatever her interest is. Anecdote: I recall when I was in nursing school, I hated to go into the E.R. because it seemed like a horrible place of suffering. It made me feel faint, actually. And anxious. But when I learned that there were things I could do to actually help, it did not make me anxious anymore and I was glad to be there so I could be useful. People need to feel useful. That is what is so hard about being a teen, that you can be so empathetic that the world is like a giant ER, and you feel you can't help. :grouphug:

:001_smile::001_smile::001_smile:

Thinking of you & praying.:grouphug:

Happy anniversary, matey!

:grouphug: and a bump

Over-emphasis on personal freedom, as a reaction to and protest of communism/totalitarianism.

Ask the nice midwife if she will "special" you which means deliver the baby even if she's not on call. Ive done this many times.

I also recommend doing a pre-marriage counselling program. Also: find out what the flashpoints are that can make you mad at each other, and find a way to deal with them. I'm not talking about major things. I'm talking about small things that can wreak havok if you let annoyances build up. Everyday things. For example, for us we are not good when it comes to packing for a trip. We run around getting frustrated with each other. So we made a computerized packing list that we use everytime we pack. It has everything we might need in categories and places to check off. And, putting up a Xmas tree. Sometimes if you are trying to get the tree up and you want the holiday to be perfect and the other person just WILL not hold it straight, it produces stress which is not so fun. There's a brand of Xmas tree holder (if you don't have Xmas trees, apply this to some other holiday situation) which is really easy to put the tree into so that it stands up nicely. I have even heard it called "the marriage-saver"! And, try driving someplace new, and one of you drives while the other navigates-- by paper map, not GPS. See how you do and if you get frustrated with each other, and learn how to accomplish this task together and how to relate to each other and give/take directions gracefully. I hope these examples do not seem too mundane. When you are young and in love, you think that love will overcome all such petty things. But actually life is composed of petty things. And it's the little things that build up and make major issues harder to deal with. If you've been nice to each other lately in your marriage, it is easier to stay on the same page when you are faced with some kind of challenge.

pm'd you.

Congratulations!:001_smile:

The thing is, our definition of things turning out right may not be God's definition of things turning out right.

Does it mean, "You won't be a good Christian example to those outside the church if you do XYZ" ? meaning, a hypocrite?

OP, I would be uncomfortable with having my littles cared for by men, too, and you have every right to expect that church policy would be followed. Good thing the Bp has backed you up. My take on her email is that the Bp scolded her and she is trying to save face by making a general kind of apology. My guess is that she will toe the line in future. I think that is the subtext you are noticing. If it were me, I would prefer to go to a church which is smaller, so I could have more of a handle on things, but if I understand right, you need to go to the church closest to where you live, right? So that wouldn't be an option. If there is trouble in the future I would address it as "the church has this policy and it needs to be followed" rather than "I have this special request and I want it to be honored." :grouphug: