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Eliana

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Eliana last won the day on December 12 2014

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About Eliana

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    Hive Mind Queen Bee

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  1. Thank you, everyone for the discussion! (not trying to cut it off, just wanting to be sure I express my appreciation!). This is a new world for me and you're all illuminating the many aspects that need to be examined - and the complexities of sorting through it all. This daughter would have been around 3 or so when the board started and first came here for companionship and shared knowledge - and here she is still benefiting from your insights!
  2. Teach English at the high school level (composition and literature, not ESL). Thinking of the longer term goals is an important angle - thank you for the reminder!
  3. Thank you, everyone! This has given her some great starting places and resources. As always, the Boards are an amazing source of information. ❤️
  4. One of my adult daughters took a break from college while having her first two kids, but would like to finish her degree (she had one year left as an English major). The kids are still really little, so, ideally, she would like to find an online option. Any suggestions?
  5. Rates of addiction and mental illnesses are not higher in people without homes than people with. (How to help those who have an addiction or a mental health need who are also homeless is still an issue, but housing first programs have been very effective.) (There's also the truth that being homeless can be deeply traumatic and isolating. For some healing from that takes time and support and opportunities to reintegrate into society.) As I mentioned before, many of the people living unsheltered are already working. And then there are the homeless kids - older teens who aged out of foster cqre, LGBTQ kids kicked out on to the streets, and younger kids whose families are homeless. Those kids are going to be looking for a way out too.
  6. Our homeless population continues to increase - as is happening in most of the large cities around the country. I can see that things might be better in areas with lower costs of living where a full time job is enough to live on, but so many of the homeless people I know here already have jobs. Where I live, and in the areas where I have contacts I'm talking with about these issues, more people are struggling and suffering. It's intensely painful to witness. Health care costs, rent, tuition, general COL are going up faster than the incomes of those in the most challenged demographics across the country - clearly with some pockets of exceptions, but this isn't just a local issue. ...but I am really happy to hear some good news from somewhere! Sorry, everyone, for the derailing!
  7. I'm not advocating for bubble wrap - but the ordinary risks of daily life and activity are different than those of tackle football, for example. And the risks you listed are not greater for people sitting and looking at their phones! ...and it someone developed a problem from too much sedentary time, the fix is easy... **there is no fix for brain injury** What people do with those facts, how individuals and communities weight the risks is going to vary - but we can't get to those decisions without looking clearly at the facts.
  8. I'm also seeing firsthand the number of people struggling to survive in my wealthy city - there are more people than ever in desperate economic circumstances. There are people for whom things have gotten better - and many, many others for whom it has gotten worse. Not trying to derail the larger conversation, but I don't want people's struggles erased in our perceptions & I believe this context is important, in many areas where we might make policy or social decision.
  9. As I said above, I'm basing my risk assessment on the lived experience of a close loved one and the experiences my friends on an international support group shared of their husbands, children, siblings and their experience of TBI. ...and those were **single** concussions, not multiple ones. I've seen so many people discover the brutally hard way that there is no reliable fix for a brain injury - and I cannot fathom understanding that and choosing to take on an avoidable risk of having my child face that.
  10. But the risk isn't instead of those daily risks, it is in addition. I think the question then becomes, what level of lifestyle alteration seems worth it to lower that cumulative risk? Bike helmets? Seat belts? Those have become fairly normal precautions parents feel are well worth the cost and minor restriction. For me, not playing sports that significantly increase that total risk of brain injury was a clear choice. Because, for me, there is not enough value added to be worth increasing my children's risk of brain injury. For other reasons as well, I would like to see competitive sports out of schools, more precautions in kids' sports, and better education for everyone about the risks of brain injury. Culturally it has been very minimized and I am glad to see that shifting. I'm also very concerned that young people in desperate need of path to college are choosing to risk their lives and bodies for the entertainment of others (and the profit of a few). And to the poster who doubted that people are choosing the military for financial reasons: I see homeless vets regularly who chose the military for financial need and the hopes of a path to financial security. Many of them now have physical injuries or illness from their service and are living on the streets, some in physical pain. Our economy might be doing well for some, but it is leaving an ever increasing number of people behind. We have to look at those facts clearly to understand the factors going into people's choices.
  11. Concussions can be life altering - brain injury has serious implications for someone's future education, career, and even relationships. I've seen TBI up close, in a loved one, but also in a support group for folks whose loved ones had TBI or ABI and I can never consider concussions trivial again. There is no sport or entertainment or exercise worth that risk. I hope that as people learn more about brain injuries and their consequences that our cultures around what is 'acceptable risk' will shift.
  12. I think class analysis is incredibly important, but I also know that I have all too often let my class lens obstruct what folks of color are trying to tell me about the role of racism, since it is something I am trying very hard to improve on, it jumps out at me more when comrades or kindred spirits do the same. I'm so glad you know there is nothing but positive intention and love from me to you - the challenges we are both striving against (from climate catastrophe to racism to income inequality) are both incredibly simple and amazingly complex. Discussion can help bring out the complexities - and help us focus on the simple urgency. I was chiming in on the 'don't erase this important component of a complex issue' side, you've been bringing home the larger context, both important pieces.
  13. There are (some) Black Britons who feel strongly that racism *is* a significant factor in this situation - I am uncomfortable with hearing that dismissed and this painted as simply about Meghan's American-ness, when there are voices with lived experience of being Black in England who are saying they see a more complex picture - and one in which race is a non-trivial factor. I don't have any capacity to argue about this couple or anything about their lives - as you've been dealing with fires and smoke, I've been worrying about getting coats and sleeping bags out to people living outside as our temperatures plummet and snow falls... the inverse of your experience of climate catastrophe and that highlights the growing income inequalities. ...but the racial component is one I think is worth spending some energy on. It is all too easy to explain away the impacts of racism as being all about something else - just as happens with misogyny, there's some other reason than gender that is plausibly presented as the 'real' reason for X, when those who know these issues better, or have lived in first hand can see clearly the role misogyny is playing in a situation. Here are two articles, from the perspective of Black folks in Britain that say their experiences there lead them to be certain race was a significant factor in this situation: [ETA I've used up my free view at the New York Times, so I'm not sure which of these is the one I remember reading a few days ago, sorry! I'll link them both.] NYT1: Black Britons Know Why Meghan Markle Wants Out NYT2: Black Britons Wonder What Took Harry and Meghan So Long and Daily Mail: Racism drove Meghan Markle out of Britain, say prominent black Britons including Labour leadership contender Clive Lewis. [Note: I only saw these because Black activists in my Twitter feed were talking about it and sharing some articles - there were others, but this is all I could remember well enough to pull up again - though I'm not sure that Daily Mail article is the right one, I remember there being more to it, but I might be conflating multiple things.]
  14. Oh, Taryl, love. I am so sorry. The image you used of last time around being hit by a truck and this time being tied to the train tracks is such a powerful one for the stress and sorrow your family has experienced - these past few months have asked so much from all of you, and I am heartbroken that this has ended with tragedy. You did everything possible, and you did it over and over again for months - you worked and prayed and cried and strived. You have been an amazing mother - to little Grant and to all your other children - through a nightmare of stress of fear and now grief. I hope and pray that as your family goes through the grief and healing that there is some space for you to, eventually, process the trauma this has been for you. Sending you do much love. May G-d bring comfort to you, and all who mourn. And may the memory of your precious little one be a blessing.
  15. Each time I took an under-18 kid to fly solo I got a gate pass from the airline. We waited in line at the counter and they printed one out for me (and often my little guy as well). ...and the person meeting them at the other end can get one as well to meet them at the gate. (I believe you need to request this at the counter when you get your pass so it is authorized ahead of time, but the airline does have a fair bit of discretion.) Even when a kid isn't nervous, it's a nicer way to be sent off and means an extra pair of hands for juggling luggage and company for the long trek to the gate from security. The airlines were all lovely about it and never hesitated to authorize the pass - for both drop off and pick up. If you want to go all the way to the gate with her, don't hesitate! They've all been fine flying with state ID cards - and that will remain true with the Real ID, but we did need to make sure their IDs complied with the new regulations. (In WA that meant getting an "enhanced" ID, but I'm sure that varies from state to state). Even with kids who have passports, I've preferred for them *not* to take their passport if they don't have to since they are much more expensive to replace, but ymmv. 🙂
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